stream of unconsciousness

breathe wait let go let God

A big majority of my life was spent thinking about you. If love ever made any sense to me it only made sense with you. I never felt it for anyone else, this intense feeling for someone. And maybe you never felt that about me and didnt plan for us to be. Maybe I did cause a ripple in your life. Or maybe it was entirely out of our control and it panned out as it was meant to. Regardless of reasoning and understanding, I’m just glad you’ve reenterred my life somehow someway n effected me in the way only u can, the way you make me feel excited at all times, the way you make me feel emotions in a long range spectrum, the way you make me think of interesting concepts, the way you bring me out of me. Ur the only person ive felt unconditional love with and to be able to tell you and express it to you is a blessing I cannot take for granted. In many ways I need you, and i hope that you need me too. I dont want it to be a one way street where im reaping all the happiness while you’re not. I do hope theyre you’re own feelings and not something I’ve imposed on you. But i do plan to keep you in my life for the remainder of my existance one way or another, I cant imagine it without you in it.

:/

I realized today that this feeling of suffocation and angst is related to my longing for you more than anything else. I’m uneasy because at the moment we can’t be close as much as we’d like to be. Initially, I was too naive to understand your emotional moments but now it’s clear to me. It hurts to the core. I wish I was more emotionally aware, these things tend to hit me with a degree of delay, due to my emotional incapacity

being intellectual and being intelligent are two different things.. the intellectual thinks through the faculties of logic where the intelligent person thinks through the factulties of both logic and emotion

Quantum physics bridges the gap between “magick” and science....

you amazed me

Time to kick some ass

What if love was objective... or maybe subjective... or maybe both

I hope my heart stays intact

Randomness is a figment of our imagination. It’s our inability to calculate variables with an omnipotent accuracy. Randomness is a law we created in our minds to cope with the flaws and subjectivities in our measurements. Laws constructed by man are narratives subject to fault.