Help

the subtext of dio is so funny like hes never explicitly hilarious but he just lounges around his mansion fucking feeding and looking sexy just in case his grandnephew checks in on him and he has a pet falcon

one of his favorite butlers is a gamer who just plays video games in the cellar all day and his henchmen include an evil baby, orangutan, and man whos stand is the entire sun; remind you hes a fucking vampire. and the rest of his minions are just his polycule

He froze time, physically moved Polnareff to the bottom of the stairs, then went back to pose on his throne just to fuck with his head

I feel like its important to note he did that last bit not just once, but every time Polnareff took a step up.

i don’t blame the part 3 villains for being evil really. if a vampire with boobs bigger than the sun came up to me and was like “ello luv cool stand how would you like to live in my mansion and get paid in either money or cock (your choice) and all you have to do is kill some guys for me?” i wouldn’t even let him finish talking. i would be there in an instant.

"Ello luv"