Don’t listen to what they say, go see.

I've been thinking a lot lately. And most of the time that's not a good thing.

But you know what I've really come to realise is that everything passes whether this be positive or negative. Over the past 12-24 months I've been through some shit and I've learnt things about myself I never thought I'd need to know. About my confidence or lack of. About how strong or weak I could be. What makes me happy or sad.

The reason I'm writing this though, is mostly to remind myself that I am the very best version of myself and the only person who has the strength to change that is myself. No one else is strong enough to beat me, change me, or make me a better or lesser version of myself. It is all up to me.

I've been through some shit, some really fucking crap shit but I've also been blessed in many ways that so many people haven't or couldn't even imagine - let alone want. I have felt immense heartbreak but I've also felt incredible love and not just from a boyfriend but from family too.

It was only through the help of a psychologist early this year that helped to make me understand why I am the way I am and why I cope or don't cope in relationships. Why I do / don't invest my love and compassion in some but not others and why I can't let some people go when others I could not care less if they fucked off.

I guess I'm writing this because I want to remind myself that I can and I always will get through this. There have been times recently I've wanted to quit, quit my relationship, my job, life as it was but to just remember that for as long as I centre my mental health as my priority - I will forever continue to be happy and healthy and be able to get through anything.