me at age 11 learning the word ‘fuck’:
KIROKAZE
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@iwritesatirenotromance
me at age 11 learning the word ‘fuck’:

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power move: saying “that’s treason” every time someone does something that mildly inconveniences you
How Much Can Kill You?
Water - Everyone has heard that they should drink 2 liters of water every day. But if you drink 3 times as much, your kidneys will not be able to process this much liquid and get it out of your system. The result can be internal organ and brain edema and respiratory arrest.
Coffee - Half an ounce of caffeine is believed to be a lethal dose. It is approximately 113 coffee cups (of 250 ml). It is worth mentioning that in this case, a person would probably die not from the caffeine overdose but water intoxication: 113 cups are actually almost 30 liters of water. So if you don’t eat coffee beans or mouthfuls of instant coffee, you are safe.
Chocolate - Chocolate contains a small amount of theobromine. This alkaloid is a powerful agent that stimulates the central nervous system. But if you ate 22 lb of chocolate in one sitting, it could lead first to nausea and diarrhea, then an epileptic fit, then internal bleeding, cardiac infarction, and finally death.
Alcohol - For a healthy man, a deadly dose would be 1.25 liters of 40% alcohol (approximately 27 shots of 45 ml each). But it will happen only if the man finishes this amount within one hour and does not throw up.
Cigarettes - Taking into account that each standard cigarette contains approximately 0.8 mg of nicotine, 75 cigarettes can blow you to kingdom come.
Marijuana - Things are slightly different with marijuana. The fatal dose is 1,500 lb, smoked within 15 minutes or 48 lb eaten at one time. And you probably won’t enjoy it at all. Not even Snoop Dogg can do that.
Apple Seeds - You won’t die from eating 18 apples. But if you take out the seeds from those 18 apples, smash them to pieces, chew them thoroughly, and swallow them, then there is a possibility that you will die because apple seeds contain cyanide.
Bananas - Bananas contain potassium, an overdose of which can lead to death. But for this to happen, you would have to eat 400 bananas in one sitting.
Oranges - To die from an orange overdose, you would need to eat 11,000 oranges in one sitting.
Salt - The everyday norm of salt is approximately 0.1 oz. A lethal dose of salt is 9 oz in one sitting (approximately 48 teaspoons). If someone decides to choose this way to commit suicide, it will be a truly regretful choice because the death would be agonizing (from a lot of enemas) and long.
Sugar - The fatal dose of sucrose is 5 oz per pound of your body weight. This means that a man would need to eat 55 lb of sugar in one go, which equals approximately 500 teaspoons
Toothpaste - Theoretically, you would need to eat 24 tubes of toothpaste to get to the afterlife.
Appleseeds and bananas are more lethal than weed. Fuck anybody who ever says anything about weed ever again.
I’m actively screaming at my phone
the ‘big three’ of coping mechanisms are jerking off, fucking up your hair, and playing your favorite music real loud

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Lmfao 😩😂😂
Lmfao 😩😂😂
hello there
the only topic i am 100% a centrist about is cats vs dogs because they’re both good and theres no argument they both love you so dont fight

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when you’re really drunk looking in the mirror
im at a point where i just don’t fucking care about anything. nickleback’s photograph came on the radio and i didn’t change the station. just sat there and listened to fucking nickleback. who gives a shit. we’re all going to die anyways
Me: *Watches one episode of Mob Wives*
Someone: Hi
Me:
『ピューロハロウィーン』

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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