It's hard being a lesbian at Sea.

they hate me for my flat facial expressions and inability to contribute to conversations

Oh, sure. You slither down ONE wall like a lizard, and suddenly your new friend (the same friend you JUST invited to stay in your house for a MONTH!) starts calling you "a creature in the semblance of a man." Smh.

the human brain is so cool, if you're tired and stressed enough, your brain will go, "don't worry, I got you" and shadows will start moving

and what's the genital situation on the shadows

oh this is my post

just felt you with my feelers. Not interested. DO NOT LAY EGGS IN OR NEAR ME.

*polishes my sword*

DO NOT JERK OFF NEAR MY NEST.

This might be the funniest reply I’ve ever seen in my life

I AM WHEEZING

PLEASE STOP REBLOGGING THIS OMFG

Oh no, this is gonna be a 100 million post.

Item: Inappropriate Douglas

i love you vampires. i love you gothic horror. i love you unsettling themes. i love you religious imagery. i love you doomed narratives. i love you rot and decay.

Wishing you a relaxed nervous system

everyone rags on dunk for not figuring out egg's a prince but if you were in london for the olympics and a small bald british child started annoying you would you assume that's prince george windsor second in line to the throne of the united kingdom. or would you kick the child.

kissing you on the forehead

with tongue?

with tongue. 🥰