tw: child abuse, near death experience & mention of mild legal drug usage.ย
first and foremost, rain hates to be called her legal and surname. sheโd get it changed if she wasnโt so avoidant. to stay in her good graces, calling her rain is- for the most part- the key.ย ย
at first glance, sheโs pretty introverted, uninterested and typically evasive to conversations she doesnโt want to have. her manager probably seeโs this side of her the most. the authority they have over her paycheck is crippling since money is a critical survival tool for her.ย
a famous line would probably be;ย โsorry, iโll do it again.โย
has a weird sense of survivals guilt? her and her mother were in a bad accident coming back from a ballet recital when she was younger, and her mother died while she survived. this was the route of her families worsening dysfunction since her father grieved with aggression and alcohol. ireun was definitely your resident older sister that served as a mother, father and provider as a teenager- that stress ate at her mental health more than sheโd thought it did.
her father trying to choke her to death seemed to be the final straw. something snapped and life suddenly was about surviving. she left her younger siblings and father with that overwhelming emotion the same night. she was about 16.ย
had been living off the street since then, always feeling guilty for not taking her siblings with her.
probably should go to therapy, doesnโt because it isnโt free and requires participation. instead, she smokes when the stress gets too heavy. but for the most part- she quit. dancing sometime helps, but sometimes- it makes things worse.ย
if sheโs too quiet, she probably has lots to say or rather, sheโd trapped in her mind with the demons her trauma left her with. she doesnโt like hand outs though, so she wonโt ever physically hint at it.ย
โiโm fine. itโs fine. iโm okay.โ are common habits sheโs grown into.
is kind of still a child at heart. her tiny apartment is completely thrifted, but with unconventional things that have conventional uses. for example; a bowl- but in the shape of a shark. an ashtray, but its in a dinky shape of a pair of lungs. a keyholder but, itโs an old mannequin hand sticking out of the wall by the front door.
FOR MORE, IโLL ADD MORE DEVLEOPED THINGS HERE.ย
just so i donโt make this into unnecessarily long.ย
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as he was just about to completely lose his footing and fly onto his back, but just as he did, he felt someone grab a hold of his arms, pulling him back a bit to prevent him from falling. as he managed to steady himself, he finally managed to look ahead and see who it was holding onto him. as his eyes settled on the girl, feeling a sense of relief that it was just rain.
โit has to be something like that for sure.โ he said, letting out a small chuckle, rubbing the back of his head a bit. โyou okayโ?โ
โ
ย ย his chuckle brought a wider smile on her own features. it served as a little gateway to once again climb out of the social shell she continues to keep herself in. austin just always had an energy that did that for her. probably because she really admired his mind- and the way he thinks. after heโd stabled himself she moved back quickly, as if her touching him just in that degree made him uncomfortable. rain just wanted to be cautious. most times, she didnโt like to be touched.ย
a smaller, and unconsciously dry laugh left her after he agreed. the girl tucked her hands back into her pockets where her reddened finger tips could find some warmth.ย โah- yeah, iโve got decent balance on ice-... most times.โย
open starter
location: outside HYDRA after closing
made w/beta
it happened quite frequently that austin was one of the last to leave hydra when they closed for the day. not for any particular reason, but he took his time cleaning up the dj booth every night as well as making sure everything was set up how he wanted it for the next time he was coming in. then came just packing up the gear that belonged to him before getting out of there.. he pushed the heavy back doors open, just hearing them close behind him with a heavy thud. before the cold air from the outside hit his face as he opened the last door that lead to the back alley way.
turning on his heel started walking right until he reached the actual street where he'd soon get around the corner to continue his way to the closest subway station so that he could reach home.. but of course, luck wasn't always his best friend, so the very moment he managed to round the alley way corner, the short man walked straight into someone that else that came walking down the sidewalk, going in the opposite direction as he was going.. with the slippy ice underneath, he lost his footing, his arms flew out as he tried to catch and steady himself which couldn't have made him look any less dorky even if he'd tried..
ย ย xย rain missed the train she intended to take- which was quite irritating since sheโd tried to clean the club faster just to beat it. the manager never liked to make the task easy for her though. even with them gone, she could hear their voice- filled with irritation and disappointment telling her to do it again. rain hated it. realistically, she just.. hated being yelled at. it was almost like a trigger for her, spiking her anxiousness and pushing her further into her shell to cope with not having the means to speak up for herself. atleast- not yet. rain was lucky the cold always seemed to distract her, soon numbing the jittery feeling sheโd left with and replacing it with a shiver.ย
the next train was probably in the next twenty minutes, after dark- the times always slowed. her options were either, wait at the station with the weird and drunk creeps of the night, or wait back at the club for ten minutes and then head to the station. she took the latter. a chime came from her phone the moment she was ready to turn the corner, and she reached for it. just in time, she felt something bump into her and all of a sudden- it felt like she was on ice. rain looked up with sharp urgency seeing the other reaching for stability when there wasnโt any. without even minding the others personal space, slipping along with him sheโs grabbed his arms on the outside while a shaky and breathy gasp left her mouth. by the time they were both confidently on their feet, she had the chance to really realize this was austin.ย โthat patch of ice... had it out for you, huh?โย
ย ย โOkay, so whatโs next after I have got you some nice coffee,โ he said taking a sip of his coffee as he walked with Rain. Rain was one of the first people he met and in a way it felt weird because the clicked in a way and over time developed this brother and sister bond. In a way Evan had adopted her as a little sister even thought he would not admit it. Evan did not spending the his day off with her, he had gotten her text yesterday and he did not pushing things around.ย
โYou might be picky about your coffee, I know I could use some breakfast and then I have no clue what the plan is.โ
ย ย ย ย ย rarely does rain find the guts to actually ask someone to hang out. usually, itโs her checking in with them here and there- or telling them sheโd be over to drop off food- but never to ask for something. Itโs difficult for her to impede on some oneโs time. evan seemed to be an exception though. there was something about his energy that made her feel emotionally calm, and a bit cared for. the feeling was weird, the fact she found a familial bond from someone sheโd only known for a few months. that just goes to show how comfortable evan made her feel. it was like he was her older brother. a connection sheโd never known.ย
ย ย ย ย โthat is a.. good question.โ her gaze trailed, trying to find the mind to come up with an activity. really, she just wanted to get out of her home for a moment. utilize her calling in for a day where she isnโt being suffocated by the same four walls. rain was truly up for anything. she just- wanted it to be in doors. it was cold. her nose turning bright pink said so.ย โbreakfast for sure, and maybe- a museum after?โ there was a beat, tucking her hands in her coat pockets. โah... that pottery shop iโve been meaning to check out is open for walk in classes today-... wanna..โ her eyes lifted to his, expecting him to chime in.ย
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Cooking and food was something that Spencer did always enjoy. But most of the watching and helping cooking and eating the food. He lived at home and had great home cooking from his parents and grand parents when they were in town. Then he moved out and right into with his at the time girlfriend and she became his wife. So had not really ever been along that much, he had someone there and someone who would always cook and made the meals for the family.ย So he was pretty new to being on his own with things. He could cook some basics, but did tend to stick to take out. Even more when he was on his own and didnโt have his daughter with him. Spence did know he had few friends that worried about that, his diet now that was on his own.
He was at home doing his best to relax his last week off before going back to work. Something he wasnโt that excited for, but it was part of life. But right now he was doing his best to try and build this large playhouse that hisย daughter got for Christmas and it wasnโt easy.ย He sighed as he laid back on the floor of his apartment soon hearing someone at the door he jumped up. Going to the door using the peep hole to see who it was he smiled when he heard the voiceย โHeyโ he said opening the door.ย โMind the mess.. building somethingโ he smiled as he let her inside.
โ
rain didnโt mind a mess. in fact, her own home always tittered between clean and distressfully unorganized. that fact this his mess was just the chaos from setting up to what looks like a childโs play house? rain would be going insane to mind it. the sentiment was so sweet, seeing a father care so much for his daughter; even if they werenโt always together. rain almost wished her own father- wherever he was- acted like spencer. the thought quickly passed though, it was a joke in good taste but too bitter to really mean. rain smiled at the mess, and stepped in with a soft chuckle.ย โ-... that looks like it has been an adventure.โย
her gaze flickered to the mess, slowing her steps to examine the craft as she made her way to his kitchen. โfor your little one?โ of course, she knew the answer- she wanted to allow him the space to brag about his daughter. it was a selfish question, but also a little selfless as well. waiting to here his voice cut through her busyness- the smaller began to set the food on a counter, removing her jacket to embrace the warmth of his apartment.ย ย
As he realized it was Rain he was offering his bottle to it caused a big smile on his face, he enjoyed the girlโs company, even though she was very different than him, they seemed to get along alright.ย โYeah, but how often do you actually see me enjoying this shit?โ he sighed and placed the bottle on the groundย โI usually chug back a beer on my break to keep a nice happy buzz goingโ.
He looked around before realizing she wasnโt even supposed to be there right nowย โyeah just closed up, thinking about making my way home, or going for a greasy breakfast burritoโ he nudged her playfullyย โwhy are you here? miss me?โ.
โ
that was true. he didnโt seem to actually like half of the shit he picks up and serves, she guessed that was part of the business. rain blinked for a moment, watching the bottle in his hand. it doesnโt look to appetizing either. but, then again- rain wasnโt a fan of drinking in general. to her, it was all shit. a dry, and soft laugh left her- trying to make the moment sincere. really, it did humor her that he had a bottle of alcohol when his speed was always beer; rain was just awkward.ย โnot often.โย
rain gave him a slow nod to acknowledge his options. both seemed plausible, and probably much needed since he was there all night. had he eaten? feeling like sheโd know him, she assumed heโd hadnโt eaten yet and was ready to vouch for him going to do both. โdid you eat yet?โ rain felt an nudge, and she leaned a little- allowing herself to feel a bit off balanced in his playfulness. without knowing it, the janitor had crinkled her nose slightly. that was a sign she didnโt know what or how she was supposed to respond. miss who? pft. austin on the other hand, she just might.ย โ-cause my wallet, i left it. i was already on the train home when i realized.โย
It was ridiculously early, the club had finally shut down and Zepplin had been there from opening to close, of course doing bumps in the back room when necessary. Heโd done a line right before he left the club so his energy was still high.
Holding a bottle of champagne up he cheered the people leaving the club, keeping up the energy as drunk people stammered out. Zepplin kept it up until he rounded the corner and his features fell just a bit, staring at the bottle in his hand that was still basically full he shrugged.ย
Looking up he noticed someone sitting on a bench and sauntered over sitting beside themย โwant this?-โ he offered up the bottle in his handย โI hate this shit, Iโd rather a beerโ he chuckled.
rainโs energy was never high. that possibly was reserved for the distant memories of running around with her siblings, pretending to be got for the thirtieth time just to hear their giggles. now, her disposition probably wavered in-between a constant state of overstimulated and tired, especially around the likes of the night clubโs bottle boy. although he was handsome, and to some a charmer, his spirit was often a shock to her. every night, zepp found some way to be the life of the party. tonight was no different, and he proved that even now; cheering away the drunk stragglers. something rain would never have the mind to do.ย
thatโs one reason why they were so different.ย
rain had watched zeppโs interactions from a bench outside the club. sheโd been waiting for everyone to leave, so she can go in- sheโd left her wallet in the janitors closet last morning- and didnโt want to make the trip back then. so despite this being her morning off, she ended up here; watching the man look her right in the eyes offering her a bottle. how fitting of him. rain swiped her reddened nose and turned on a awkward but sociable smile,ย โ-no...โ her head shook, tapping away ash onto the floor beside her feet.ย โyouโre the bottle boy, keep it.โ a small, gentle chuckle finished that statement off and she sniffled at the cold.ย โjust closed up?โย
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SPECIAL DELIVERY
โณ 12:39 pm, spenceโs abode- for a late and forced afternoon lunch
withย @spencekozolvโโ / xย
rain knew how it felt to be hungry. not conventionally, when you know there is always food in your reach but- starving without knowing how or when sheโll be able to cure that empty pain. that was why she was sentimental when it came to feeding herself, and occasionally others. spence was a friend of hers that didnโt necessarily carry the same soft strictness as she, but thatโs exactly why sheโd tried to make it a sporadic habit to feed the man with real, and home cooked food. heโd brought this on himself though- always mentioning his constant stops to food trucks that charge more for a small wrap of food when cooking a few days supply was going to be way easier on his pockets. rain cared for things like that.ย
the woman stopped at his door, a few containers of food wrapped up in a dark green silk- tied and going strong in her thin nimble fingers. after rubbing at her nose, red from the chilled air outside she knocked with a quiet sniffle. cold temperatures always made her nose run.ย โspecial delivery.โ her voice friendly, but still lacking a natural sense of energy.ย
How do you move and carry yourself? What energy do you project?
"that... is a difficult question. i donโt know... like a person? who has gone through enough to just- want to be left alone i guess. i suppose my energy can be very, underwhelming? youโd have to ask a friend.โย
rain actually struggles with understanding how she moves because really, sheโs always in her head. grief, guilt, stress, and anxiety really do distract her from understanding what type of person she is since at heart, she can be very childish and simple. from her understanding, sheโs a very dull person cause she people have told her can look gloomy, uninterested and lost all at once even if sheโs just wondering what sheโs eating for dinner. if anyone ever gets close enough, her home personality is much brighter and inviting when she lets herself have fun. others will just have to find it through time?ย
i worried this would make it hard for her to have fun connections, but i plan to give her a bunch of awkward interactions with anyone that will take one with her. i def want people to challenge her energy, and even pull her out of her shell in a way that isnโt too clichรฉ. just her genuinely, feeling uncomfortable and struggling to adjust to it.ย
in order to survive, sometimes you need to result to violence in rainโs eyes. when youโre staring into someoneโs cold expression and their gaze can care less for your well being, whether you live or die? the power of friendship wonโt cut it. rain will always choose her survival, and if violence comes with that- so be it.ย
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