you drive me madden

If you want to go wild, why not do it fully? Chocolate sauce it is, darling. You went on to roll onto the floor without stopping? Why? Did you hurt yourself? I hope not. Aw, my poor Rich. It is a very sad life without said wandering hand… it’s very good in distracting me from sleeping, but I cannot bring myself to mind. And it isn’t like I don’t cop a feel once in a while, just to tease you.

Is there video evidence of this? I hope so, because I’d love to see that. The rapport you two have makes me so happy? She has her dad, of course, and she loves him. But then there’s you, her Richie. Lea deserves to have you in her life. I’m so happy she has you. I’m happy I have you, too, by the way. 

I rolled, and kind of fell onto the floor, if you could even call it that... It was more like a crash that woke me up. I remained pretty unscathed, apart from my dignity. Managed to dodge smacking my head against the nightstand so that’s something. I think that a life without a hand distracting you sounds more alarming than me falling to the floor. I might have missed that hand of yours, too.

I’m not too good at pushing swings with one hand and filming with the other, that would definitely be a casualty waiting to happen. I wouldn’t be without --well, the two of you. You’ve both shaped my life and grounded me in ways I can’t begin to explain.

I never said there’s anything wrong with it, but please, do dip your vanilla in sprinkles once in a while. Liven it up! Life is too short to play it too safe. I do love your vanilla-ness, and everything that comes with it. I love you, most of all. I can imagine, poor, poor Richie - did you flail about? Did you let our dogs sleep in our bed? Did you hug a pillow? That’s what I did. But it doesn’t smell like you, so it’s not the same. There’s also no cheeky hand distracting me, when I’m trying to sleep. I know, I know, but I will turn down some jobs, just so I can stay with you for a bit. I miss my family. 

You catapulted my daughter out of the swings? Are you mad?! Please tell me you caught her…

Sprinkles and... what about chocolate sauce? Or is that a step too far? Do you know what happened one night - and I know you’re going to laugh at me - I rolled right on over to your side of the bed and then, eventually onto the floor. From there, I went with building a pillow wall because I couldn’t risk landing on a dog. No cheeky hand? Sounds a sad life. What a good thing it is that that you’ve got that back. And we’ve missed you too, a lot, believe me.

Not catapulted! But I did push her quite high and there was a lot of squealing and laughing about it, any higher and it would have been a catapulting incident. 

You’re too vanilla for your own good, Richard. You’d see it’d be fun, if you just tried. Well, yes, that’s the whole point of getting tied up - or is it down? - somewhere. Mmm, always. I sleep better, when you are there with me. There’s just something about snuggling up with you, staying in your arms that is really safe and comfortable. Right?! How come we let that happen? I cannot get too busy for you and my baby. Babies, counting Charlie and Katie. There’s nothing short about you. No way.

Oh, I heard some adventures already. You let her fly apparently, Rich… I mean, if I were to take her word for word, you let her launch herself off the swings and fly…

I’m going to say what I always say, and that’s that there’s nothing wrong with being a little bit vanilla...  It’s a basic flavour, but you can always add to it make it just that little more interesting but at the end of the day there’s nothing wrong with it. I’ve not known what to do with them the last few weeks? It’s odd sleeping in a bed alone and trying to find a comfortable position. You know, at the end of the day, I think we both know being too busy isn’t a possibility..  

I’d go ahead and take that literally - have you seen my swing pushing skills? They’re to the extreme.

I made sure the kitchen was the first room to be fully done. Bedroom? Who cares, I can sleep anywhere. Living room? No need for a tv if I don’t have any food to enjoy while watching anything. So the kitchen was my first room to get done… and then the possibility of cooking loads of food distracted me.

It’s a good ethic to have, but let me convince you of this one... Do the kitchen and the bedroom together, because than you have your food, a place to relax with it, and a place to sleep. It’s a winner if you ask me. What was the first thing that you cooked in your new kitchen?

[text]: And Paul McCartney too! I'm sharing it with two legends.

I’d leave that up to you, but perhaps not too tight, I get bruised easily? How long have we known each other already? There’s still a lot you don’t know about me. But this… it was mostly theoretical. If I’m out of sight, no one can book me, and I can stay home with you and Lea, and cuddle back in bed with the both of you. Months? Try a lifetime. I feel like I’m on the road constantly, when all I want is to be home. Yes please, come with me. Perhaps I can smuggle you in my carry on luggage. I’ve missed you, Rich. 

How have my two loves been?

I feel like I need to get out of this quick before I dig myself into too deep of a hole that I can’t crawl out. If you’re out of sight and tied up to to speak, then the plan would work, wouldn’t it? We’re definitely both looking forward to those cuddles. It feels -- I’ll hand it to you, it has been a little bit of a lifetime. I’m short enough to fit into that carry on, you’d squeeze me in no problems.

We’ve been good! Your little bundle of energy had fun this morning at the swing park. I think her stories of what’s been going on are going too be better than anything I can tell you.

Will it sound desperate that I want you to tie me down somewhere, so I don’t have to leave so readily again? I mean… work has been something else these past weeks. I’m so happy to see your handsome face, though, @itsrichmadden​.

It can certainly be arranged if you tell me how you want it to be done... But I didn’t realise that you were into that sort of thing. It really has - these past few weeks have felt like a few months in total. But I’ve missed you, and I’m happy to have you home. Next time you jet off somewhere, I’m coming with you. 

INSTAGRAM: itsrichmadden uploaded a photo

Still to this day don’t know what I did to get so lucky, but I’m glad I did it. 

INSTAGRAM: itsrichmadden uploaded a photo

Last time I met up with you and Lea, she told me all about her unicorn friend, Papu, and when I spotted these in a shop in Boston I could not resist getting her friend another friends to play with. On top of that, their price went to a good cause at Boston Children’s Hospital. For every unicorn, a child patient gets a toy, too. 

Merry Christmas, Rich! Max

You have a step-daughter, after all, so colouring should come easy to you. And if you’re like me, and have long make-up trailer sitting times, you can use them to colour one of these tongue-in-cheek fun designs. 

Merry Christmas, Soph

There’s always a need for more dad jokes in this world, and you can practice them all on Lea, and Irina. And please, let us take part in that, too!

Merry Christmas, Rich! Alfie

This LEGO Christmas Box reminded me so much of us and our friendship that I couldn’t resist. I hope you enjoy having it in your study.

Merry Christmas, Rich! T & family