I am 23 years old, non-binary and I like horror movies.
đ¨đ¨ Before you go any further, I need to make sure any minors coming into this page take precaution. I do post nasty stuff sometimes. I have a mouth like a sailor. Iâm not very minor friendly. But I am not your mama so you can do what you want. Donât come crying to me if you get disturbed by something I post on here aight?
Anyways, I write things sometimes. If you click below, you can see just what I offer!
Some of the characters I may write drabbles for include:
Remmick from Sinners đЏđŞ
Sir Jimmy Crystal from 28 Days Later đđ
âŚThatâs pretty much it, but the list may change based on if I get that feeling for a new character (especially if itâs a Jack oâConnell character, that man has me in a chokehold).
I am open to writing smut but you gotta understand, Iâm a loser ass virgin who has no idea how sex works outside of watching it in movies, but Iâll do what I can.
I will warn you, I work full time at a factory so updates may be here and there, maybe faster if the creative sparks start flying. But if you are interested in a one shot of any of these characters or even some I ainât mentioned that youâd like to see, shoot me a message or an ask and Iâll see what I can do!
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your daddy sticks the strange new farmhand in the small house by the barn, figuring itâs safer to keep a man like that close. it isnât. remmick spends his nights watching you, and when you finally sneak down in your nightgown to âset him straight,â he bends you over his table and fucks the fight right out of you. (wc: 22k). ao3 link
ănotes â¸â¸.áâ i was mad horny everytime i opened the doc to work on this⌠this is def one of my fav fics that i have written, and iâm ngl and say i wonât write anything else with this dynamic bc itâs too juicy. beta read by my offline irl bbg (iâm trying to get her to make an acc đ)
ă contents â¸â¸.áâ morally dubious behavior. virginity taking. peeping tom behavior / voyeurism (heâs a creep). m!masturbation. size kink. vaginal fingering. very light choking. groping. manhandling. breeding kink if you squint. messy sex. cum play. light overstimulation. rough sex. table sex. unprotected p in v. power imbalance. period-typical misogyny. small talks of purity culture. predator / prey vibes. praise w a little degradation. possessiveness. mdni 18+
Night eases down over the fields slow as molasses, settling in the furrows and fence lines until everything looks dipped in ink.Â
The porch sits right on the edge of it, a little island of yellow lantern light with you cross-legged in your chair, enamel bowl in your lap, fingers slick with bean juice. Crickets grind away in the ditch, frogs answer from somewhere near the pond, and the heat that pressed on your skin all day finally lets go a little, turning soft and damp and heavy instead of mean.
Your daddy, Joe, stands out by the road with a cigarette, just that small orange coal drifting up and down whenever he draws on it.
Heâs mostly shadow, hat brim pulled low, shoulders a dark cutout against the pale strip of dirt lane. The smoke hangs around him in thin gray strands, catching the lantern glow before the breeze worries it apart.
The wagon makes itself known before you see it. A tired rattle carrying over the fields long and low, iron and wood complaining in a way that could belong to any old rig on any old night.Â
The mule steps out of the dark first, ears flicking, hooves whispering in the dust, harness creaking, then the wagon-bed, then the man riding it, the whole shape of him hunched against the evening like the roadâs been sitting on his back.
He climbs down slow, not careless, one boot testing the ground, then the other. He isnât tall; not one of those long, scarecrow boys you see come through town sometimes. Heâs put together closer to the earth than that, thick through the shoulders and arms, weight settled in the meat of him instead of stretched out.Â
Shirt pulls across his chest where the fabric has been asked to hold too much too often, sleeves rolled to his forearms, muscle and old work written in the dust and veins there. Suspenders run straight over his torso, holding everything decent, but thereâs something loose under the neatness, a restless set to the way he carries himself, like heâs got more energy than his frame knows what to do with.
His hat sits low enough to shade most of his face until he steps up nearer and the porch light reaches for him.
âEveninâ, Sir,â he says, voice a slow scrape, low and worn, like itâs been dragged over gravel and cigarettes for years.Â
The vowels donât belong to your county, not exactly, but he leans into them like heâs been practicing, trying to make them fit the dirt under his boots.
âEveninâ,â Joe, flicks ash toward the ditch without turning. âYou Remmick?â
âYes, sir.â
He takes off his hat then, presses it to his chest in a gesture that seems to be humble, and in that little bow you see the line of him clear.Â
Hair dark and close-cropped, stubborn where itâs tried to wave up and been tamed with water and a hand. Jaw rough with stubble that looks more forgotten than stylish.Â
Thereâs a hardness around his mouth, something that could tilt into a grin or a snarl with not much provocation either way.
When he straightens and lifts his eyes, they cut toward the porch, and you feel it right away when they land on you, as sure as if somebody laid a hand on your bare ankle.
A limp green bean hangs between your fingers, ends torn and wet.
His gaze drifts, following your calves where your skirtâs ridden up, running along the slope of your shins and the span of your knees pressed together, sliding up the line of your apron and the thin open V between your collar buttons where the night air pushes in against your skin.Â
He looks like heâs reading you, not just seeing you, taking his time over every line.
You go still, sharp-aware of every place your dress touches your body and every place it doesnât.
The bean pieces drop into the bowl as you lower your eyes to the boards. The porch wood is dark and warped from years of feet, knot-holes winking like little eyes in the dim.
You fix on those, on the small wet snaps and soft taps of beans piling against enamel. Anything that is not the feeling of a strangerâs stare walking up and down you like a man checking fence.
âBaby,â your father says, voice flat, cigarette smoke curling out on the word. âSay eveninâ.â
You wipe your hands on your apron and stand, bare feet quiet on the boards. âEveninâ,â you say, polite as sunday, letting the rest of what you feel sink down where it wonât show on your face.
Remmick smiles like he hears it anyway. It isnât wide or warm. Just a slow tug at one corner of his mouth, a small, crooked tilt that never quite reaches his eyes.
âEveninâ, miss,â he answers, and thereâs a drag in that word miss, the s held just long enough to make it catch.
Miss, when he could have asked for your name, when any decent man might have. Your father hasnât offered it yet, so you keep it closed up in your mouth.
âGirl oughta be in bed this hour,â Joe mutters, eyes on the yard, not on you. âAinât no call for her to be sittinâ out like some boy on watch. Nightâs for men workinâ, not for women gawkinâ.â
The words land on your shoulders like an old coat, familiar weight, old smell. You bite down on what you want to say and feel it burn on the way down.
âIâm finishinâ the beans,â you tell him instead, hands tightening on the bowl till the rim bites into your palms. You donât bother trying to explain that the dark sits easier on your skin than the hard white noon does, that the night gives you a little space to stretch.
You can feel Remmick watching you still, not with that sloppy hunger youâve seen from boys in town, all elbows and gawking.
This is like heâs comparing what he sees to something heâs held in his head a long time.Â
âDonât reckon thereâs any harm in her gettinâ some air, Sir,â he says after a moment, pitched low, as if heâs offering reason and not meddling. âSo long as she stays where you can see her.â He tips his head, and his eyes make another lazy path over you, unashamed. âWorldâs rough for a girl on her own.â
Your daddy snorts, jaw tightening just enough for you to notice. âYou just worry âbout them fields, son. I didnât hire you to advise on my girl.â
The almost-smile on Remmickâs mouth doesnât quite leave. âYes, sir,â he says. âIâll give all my attention to what youâre payinâ me for.â
He keeps his words aimed at your father, but his gaze is not that obedient. It flicks back to you when he says attention, and thereâs weight in it, promise, something that makes your skin prickle fine all over. Something in you bristles right back, lifts its head like a barn cat whose tailâs been stepped on.
You draw a breath and set the bowl against your hip. âWhere you want him sleepinâ?â you ask your father, eyes fixed out over the yard so you donât have to meet either manâs stare straight on.
âIn the old place.â Joe jerks his chin toward the smaller farmhouse slumped beyond the wellâa squat little shape where the lamplight doesnât reach, half-eaten by shadow. âCloser to the barn. Got a bed and a stove. Man donât need more than that.â
Remmick turns to look at it, and the lantern light catches his eyes in a strange way, making them flash for an instant like thereâs something slick behind them.
The little house sits there like itâs been waiting, windows dark, door shut up tight, roofline sagged just enough to look suspicious.
âThatâll do,â he says. âIâm a night sort myself. Easier workinâ when the sunâs gone and the air ainât tryinâ to boil you clear through. Less trouble all around.â
He says it easy, like itâs about sweat and shade and nothing else, but you hear the way he shapes night in his mouth, the soft way he lets it roll off his tongue, and something in your belly curls up smaller and sharper.
âHeard you donât care much for daylight,â Joe says, watching him out of the corner of his eye.
Remmickâs jaw shifts, a muscle ticking like it wants to answer on its own. He glances at you, quick and bright, before he looks down at his boots. âSun donât care much for me,â he finally drawls. âBurns me to char if I let it. Always been that way. Doctor said I got delicate skin.â
The word sits wrong in your ear as soon as itâs out, delicate, dangling over this stocky man with forearms roped up in tendon and dirt ground into his knuckles, hands that look like they were made to break things, not handle them gentle.Â
It slips out of you before you can catch it, quiet and skeptical. âDelicate,â you repeat, eyes finding his without meaning to.
He catches that and settles into it like a cat into a warm spot. âYou donât think so, miss?â he asks, voice a touch softer now, gaze steady and unblinking.
You ought to let it pass. Ought to dip your head and let the men talk over you, let delicate lie between them like some joke you werenât meant to get.Â
Instead you hold his stare in the lantern glow, take your time looking back the same way he did to you, tracing the faint hollows under his eyes, the line of his nose, the mouth that looks used to biting down on words and maybe on other things too.
âNo, sir,â you say finally, after a beat that stretches long. âYou donât look delicate at all.â
Something shifts behind his eyes at that, something pleased and sharp that makes your heart knock once, hard, against your ribs. The corner of his mouth tugs just a shade higher.
âThen I suppose Iâll have to live up to what you see,â he murmurs. âWould be a shame to disappoint you.â
Your daddy grinds his cigarette out under his heel, done with this line of talk. âYou can unload what you got, then Iâll show you the place,â he says. âGot work waiting for nobody. You ainât too tired from sittinâ on a wagon all day, are you?â
Remmick rolls one shoulder, hand rubbing the back of his neck. The stretch shifts his shirt over his back, pulls the fabric across solid muscle there.
You feel your breath snag for half a second and hate that it does.
âWagon ainât heavy,â he says. âIâll get settled quick, then you can put me to whatever needs doinâ.â
Joe nods and starts toward the dim outline of that little house, his boots crunching through the loose gravel near the well. The lantern light falls behind him with each step until heâs just another moving patch of dark.
Remmick lingers at the foot of the porch. He settles his hat back on his head, brim bringing his eyes into shadow again, but you can still feel them.
âYou finish them beans,â he tells you, voice gone softer, aimed up at you like a secret. âMan works better with a full belly.â
Thereâs nothing in the words you could point to and call wrong, nothing on the surface you could carry to your father and hold up like proof.
Still, the way his gaze drifts down and back up as he says them leaves something slick and uneasy under your ribs. Heat crawls up your neck, hot in a way that has nothing to do with the air.
âIâll see to whatâs mine,â you say, gripping the bowl till your fingers ache. âSame as you should see to yours.â
His laugh is low, a rough little sound that lives in his chest and doesnât quite make it to his teeth. He dips his head a fraction, like youâve handed him a dare instead of brushing him off. âOh, I intend to,â he replies. âYou can count on it.â
Then he turns and walks after your father, stride easy, body moving with a loose sort of purpose. His shadow stretches out along the yard behind him, tossed strange and long by the lantern, then swallowed up as he and Joe move past the well.Â
The small farmhouse waits ahead, black windows staring, door a darker cut in the wall. It looks, for one breath, like itâs swallowing the two men whole.
You stand there with the lantern hissing softly at your elbow and watch the dark take them.Â
When the yard settles again, when their footsteps fade and the crickets creep back up to full volume, the space between the barn and the house does not feel the same. Itâs as if something else has stepped into it and sat down, something you cannot see but can sense just the same, like a pressure change before a storm.
You sit again, bowl back in your lap, fingers finding another handful of beans by habit alone. The wet snap of them breaking sounds too loud in the hush, echoing in the hollow boards under your feet.Â
Every few seconds, your eyes drag toward that low silhouette out past the well, toward the little house that is not empty anymore.
You tell yourself youâre only minding where your father put a stranger.Â
The first night after he arrives, he walks the fence line while you wash dishes.
You hear his boots dragging through the loose gravel near the yard, then the softer sound of steps in the grass.Â
The screen door hangs open to let the air move, lantern burning low over the sink. Your arms are wet to the elbow, suds creeping up your forearms as you scrub at a pan thatâs older than you are.Â
Out past your own reflection in the dark window, you catch a small shape of motionâthe swing of a lantern out near the barn, then the shorter, solid outline of him moving along the fence, checking posts, rattling wire.Â
He doesnât look up at the house that you can tell, doesnât lift the light toward you, just keeps on with that steady pace, head bent.Â
Still, your shoulders hunch like youâve been caught at something you havenât done. The glass fogs a little with the breath you donât remember letting out.
You tell yourself itâs good your father found a man willing to walk the property at night. Thatâs what you tell yourself as you rinse plates and stack them, as the little yellow circle of his lantern slides back and forth along the edge of your sight.
The second night you have to bring him his supper, because your father âforgets.â
Itâs late by the time the last of the pots are scraped and put away, your back aching from standing, hair pasted to your neck. Joe leans back in his chair, radio humming low on the table, and says without looking up, âThat boy eat?â
You still your hands on the dishrag. âAinât seen him at the table.â
âDamn it,â He grumbles, more at himself than you. âTold him come in if he heard me holler and I ainât never thought to holler. Fix him a plate and take it down. Man donât work right hungry.â
You swallow whatever you were about to say about whose job it is to feed farmhands, scrape together a plate from whatâs leftâtwo biscuits gone hard at the edges, a ladle of beans, a piece of ham with more bone than meatâand cover it with a clean cloth.Â
The air outside hits your damp skin and feels cooler than it ought to. The night smells like dirt and hay and whateverâs blooming along the ditch.Â
The smaller farmhouse sits out near the barn with a faint thread of light leaking around the edges of its curtain, not bright enough to spill onto the yard. You walk out there, skirt brushing your ankles, plate balanced careful in both hands.
You knock, knuckles soft on the wood. For a second thereâs nothing, then the faint scrape of a chair, the hush of someone crossing a small room.Â
The door opens only halfway. He fills the gap, shoulder and chest just there, heat and sweat.
âEveninâ,â he says, voice a little rough, like he hasnât used it since sundown. âYou lost?â
You hold the plate out, not stepping any closer than you have to. âDaddy forgot to call you in. Told me to bring your supper.â
His eyes go to your hands first, to the way your fingers wrap the rim of the plate, then to the food, then back up.Â
He doesnât reach right away; he lets the moment stretch, his gaze traveling from your wrists up your arms, lingering on the damp on your skin, on the few stray strands that have worked loose at your temple and stuck there.Â
âThatâs mighty kind,â he says at last, taking the plate so slow his fingers brush yours.Â
Theyâre not as rough as you expected, just warm and solid, the pads of them catching against your knuckles. âHope he didnât drag you out here from your bed on account of me.â
âI wasnât in bed,â you answer, because lying feels worse than telling him anything true. âKitchen donât clean itself.â
He makes a small noise at that, somewhere between agreement and amusement. âNo, maâam. Worldâd fall apart if it werenât for everything women do men donât think about. Least he can do is call me in for a plate now and then instead of sending you.â
You donât like that it sounds almost gentle, that thereâs no clear edge you can grab onto and call wrong.
You nod once and start to turn away, wanting the room behind that door to stay his business and not have to wonder whatâs in it.
âMiss?â he says, and you stop even though you donât want to. âYou tell your daddy Iâm obliged. To him and to you.â
You keep your eyes on the yard. âHeâll hear you tomorrow.â
âMaybe I like the thought of you carryinâ my thanks,â he says, voice dipping lower.
You donât answer to that. You walk back toward the big house with your empty hands and you feel his eyes between your shoulder blades all the way to the porch steps.
Another night you pass him by accident at the pump.
You come around the corner of the house with a pail in each hand, too focused on not sloshing well water onto your skirt to notice him right off.Â
Heâs just there suddenly in the lanternâs edge, sleeves rolled high, suspenders hanging loose at his hips, hair damp with sweat or water; you canât tell which.Â
The pump squeaks once as he lets go of the handle. Moonlight catches the wet on his forearms, the curve of muscle there, the scar that runs pale along his left wrist like a rope burn that never faded.
You stop short, pails swinging. âDidnât know you were usinâ it,â you say. âIâll wait.â
He tips his head, that same little crooked half-smile thinking about showing up. âYou scared Iâm gonna dirty the water, standinâ too near?â His accent is thicker tonight, as if heâs tired of smoothing them for everybodyâs sake.
âI ainât scared,â you say. Your voice comes out flatter than you mean it to, which only makes him watch you harder. âJust got taught not to crowd folk when theyâre at work.â
âAnd here I thought you were just beinâ polite,â he murmurs. He steps back from the pump, gives you room to pass. âGo on, then. Wouldnât do to have Mr. Joeâs girl haulinâ from the ditch âcause I hogged the handle.â
You move past him, the damp of his skin ghosting near your elbow, the smell of iron and sweat and something like tobacco clinging to him. You set a pail under the spout and work the handle, arm moving in a practiced rhythm.
The pump groans, then warm water shudders up from below, splashing cold over your fingers when you misjudge the first rush.
His gaze sits on your hands again, on the bare forearms you didnât bother covering because itâs night and thereâs no sun to scold you. âYou do all that yourself?â he asks. âWater, cookinâ, everything inside?â
âMe and Mama,â you say, though your motherâs cough has been bad enough lately you both know itâs more you than her. âDaddyâs got the fields.â
âAnd now heâs got me,â Remmick says, watching your arm work. âGuess Iâm supposed to make life easier âround here.â
âThen do it,â you answer, a little sharper than you meant. The second pail fills and you swing it away, careful not to splash your toes. âDonât stand around talkinâ about it.â
For a heartbeat thereâs quiet. Then he laughs, low and delighted. âThere she is,â he says under his breath, as if heâs been waiting on that bite.Â
When you glance over, he isnât offended. He looks satisfied, eyes bright, lean mouth curled up. âYou keep snappinâ at me like that, miss, I might start thinkinâ youâre sweet on me.â
âOr you might start thinkinâ wrong,â you shoot back, lifting both buckets. The weight drags at your shoulders, but youâd sooner drop in the yard than ask him to carry them.
He doesn't offer, just watches you walk away, and you can feel that as keenly as the pull of the water on your arms.
There are other little moments like that, small as splinters. Like, when you cross paths in the barn one evening when you go to check on a cow that lowed funny through your window.Â
Heâs already there when you reach the threshold, one hand on the animalâs neck, murmuring something soft and nonsense in her ear.Â
She calms under his touch, sides heaving slow, eyes rolling less. The lantern hangs from a nail overhead, throwing golden light over the dust in the air, over his shoulders, over the cowâs hide.Â
He glances up when he senses you, and for a blink his irises flash almost too light, as if the lanternâs in them and not above him. Then theyâre ordinary again, a color you could name if you got close enough, and heâs saying, âShe just didnât like the thunder,â even though the skyâs been clear all day.
You lean on the stall rail, arms folded, watching his hand move in slow strokes along the cowâs neck.Â
The steadiness of him with animals makes something twist in you, something like reluctant respect and something like fear, because if he can soothe two thousand pounds of nervous flesh with a voice and a touch, what could he do to yours if he ever decided to try.
On another night you fix a tear in one of his work shirts at the kitchen table because your father plops it there and says, âStupid foolâs gonna walk around with his arm hanginâ out if someone donât thread a needle.âÂ
You mutter that Remmick has two hands and surely they can manage a seam, but you fetch your sewing basket anyway.Â
The fabric smells faintly of him, sweat and field and that odd metallic thread thatâs been nagging at the back of your senses since he arrived.Â
You push the needle through worn cotton and wonder how a man gets a rip that clean across the bicep, by snagging it on barbed wire or nail head, without a single bloodstain around the torn edge.
He shows up to collect it before you take it down yourself. Donât know how he knows itâs ready, but heâs at the door not long after you knot the last stitch, hat in hand like heâs paying a call.
Your fatherâs gone out back to piss or smoke or both, your motherâs dozing in her chair, so itâs just you in the quiet kitchen with your fingers still sore from the work.
âYou didnât have to,â he says when you hand the folded shirt over. âCouldâve walked around indecent a day or two, see if anyone complained.â
âMy father would,â you say. âDonât like loose things on his land.â
He takes the shirt with his good arm, the other rolling his shoulder like it aches. The lantern throws his eyes into little warm coins.Â
Some nights you only see him from a distance.
Through your bedroom window when you should be sleeping, you catch the sway of his lantern again and again, marking his rounds. In the moonlight, his stride is compact, efficient, not showy.Â
He moves like someone whoâs spent a long time walking alone, someone who knows better than to waste steps. He never seems to stumble, never misjudges a rut or loose stone.
You watch him slip between the barn and the smaller house, in and out of shadow, and you tell yourself youâre just making sure heâs where he should be, that you are only doing what your father would want.
You notice, too, the nights when the light in his window stays on longer than makes sense. Long after your fatherâs snores have settled and your mamaâs breath has evened into sleep, after youâve lain there staring at the ceiling until your eyes burn, that far-off square of yellow will still be sitting out there at the edge of your sight.Â
Sometimes you think you see the shadow of him cross it, head bowed, shoulders hunched, moving back and forth in a tight little path, but when you squint itâs gone.
Once, you step out onto the porch for air and catch him already looking.
You donât see him at first; you just feel that prickling awareness that has become his signature in your body.Â
Then your eyes find him where heâs paused near the barn, one hand on the fence post, the other hanging loose at his side. No lantern this time, just moonlight on his face, flattening all the hard parts, making his eyes look too bright and his mouth too soft.Â
He doesnât look away when you notice him. He doesnât call out or tip his hat in greeting. He just stands there in the dark, steady as another post, and lets you decide whether to step back inside or stay where the night can see both of you.
You stay a breath longer than you should, chest tight, heartbeat stepping up loud between your ears. Then you reach for the door, fingers curling around splintered wood, and it feels, for a strange second, like youâre the one retreating and heâs the one who lives here.
By the time a week has worked itself around, his presence has braided into the place.
The horse knows him, ears twitching toward his voice before dawn. The dogs have quit barking when his boots scrape the yard at dusk. Your father has stopped watching him like he might bolt and started calling for him when something heavy needs lifting.Â
The small farmhouse doesnât look so empty now; youâve grown used to the idea of a manâs breath in there, a manâs boots by the door, a manâs shadow on the curtain.
Youâre the one still wary, nerves still stretched thin every time you feel his eyes, even if nobody else in the house seems to notice how often that is.Â
You catch him in little reflectionsâa sliver of him in the pumpâs metal, in the window glass, in any surface that throws back lightâand heâs always looking your way.Â
Not always outright, not always rude, but always aware of you. Always clocking where you are in the yard, whether your sleeves are rolled, whether your hem rides high on your calf or hangs proper at your ankle.
You tell yourself itâs just because thereâs not much else worth watching out here.
You donât quite believe it.
Clouds bruise up toward the horizon, swallowing the moon a few bites at a time. Youâre at the kitchen table with mending in your lap when you hear itâone sharp, panicked bawl from the barn that cuts straight through the hum of crickets and the low murmur of your fatherâs radio.
Youâre on your feet before you think about it, thimble still shoved on your finger, needle stuck tight in a loop of thread.Â
Your father says something about âdamned horses spookinâ at their own shadowsâ but doesnât move from his chair.
His backâs been bad all day; heâs been walking like every step hurts. Mamaâs dozing, her breath a thin whistle.Â
So you grab the lantern from its hook, light blooming up in a hot bloom that stings your eyes, and head out barefoot into the yard.
The grass is cool against your soles, damp from the thick air. The little farmhouse where Remmick sleeps has a strip of light at the curtain-bottom, but you donât see him outside. The barn looms ahead, big and dark, door standing half-open like a mouth. Another low, fretful sound comes from inside, not as sharp as the first but enough to hurry you along.
âEasy now,â you call as you slip in, lantern held high. âHush yourself, girl, Iâm cominâ.â
The barn swallows the outside sounds. In here itâs hay and dust and the soft shuffling of hooves, the rustle of wings up in the rafters.Â
Your mare stamps once, snorting, eyes rolling white when the lantern light hits her. You cross the packed dirt quick, set the lantern on a hook so youâve got both hands, and reach for her halter, stroking her long face.
âItâs just the weather actinâ strange,â you murmur, words more for yourself than her. âAinât nothinâ gonna hurt you.â
She settles a little under your voice, but her muscles are still tight, skin twitching under your palm.
Youâre so focused on her that you donât hear him until heâs already in the doorway.
âSomethinâ wrong?â
His voice slides through the gloom, low and rough.Â
You jerk a little, head snapping toward the barn entrance. Heâs just inside the threshold, lantern in his hand turned down low, throwing more shadow than light. Sleeves rolled, suspenders hooked proper tonight, hair damp at the temples like heâs just come in from a hard walk.Â
âLord,â you mutter, heart kicking hard. âYou move too quiet. Thought you were a ghost.â
He lets out a short huff of a laugh. âNot yet.â The lantern swings by his knee as he steps inside, setting the hay shadows dancing. âHeard her fussinâ. Figured Iâd check before she took it into her head to kick through a stall.â
âShe just spooked,â you say. âStorm brewinâ somewhere.â
He comes up nearer, close enough that you can see the sheen of sweat along his throat, the bead of something darker at the cuff of his shirt where it brushes his wrist.Â
His gaze does a quick, automatic sweep of the stallâmanger, bucket, the mareâs flanks, your hand on her halterâand then it hooks on you, like it always does, like thereâs a string between his eyes and your skin.
âYou shouldnât come out here by yourself at night,â he says, quiet, not rebuking exactly but not gentle either. âBarn full of spooked stock, any one of âem could knock you right off your feet. Ainât proper for a girl to be runninâ around after dark alone.â
âThat girlâs got ears,â you answer, voice tight, stroking the mareâs neck to hide your own nerves. âShe can hear you fussinâ without talkinâ over her head.â
His mouth does that little tilt again, amused. âReckon she can,â he says. âReckon she donât listen half as good as she ought, neither.â
Youâre just shaping a sharp reply when it happens.
Something cracks outside, a dry, sharp soundâmaybe a limb breaking, maybe a board settling wrong, maybe thunder grumbling way off where the clouds are thickest.Â
It doesnât matter what it is. The mare flinches hard, shoulder slamming sideways. The stall rail shudders under the hit, and youâre standing too close, lantern throwing crazy shadows as the world jolts.
Your first instinct is to get out of the way. You jump back, skirts swishing, hand flying off the halter. You pivot toward the stall opening and catchânot air, not clear space, but the edge of an old nail head thatâs been working itself loose from the post for years.
The sound of fabric tearing is loud as a gunshot in the barn.
It rips from just below your hip down the side of your thigh, a long, rude run that opens your dress like a mouth.Â
Cool air hits bare skin where cotton should be.
You gasp, more from the exposure than pain, and slap your hand down, fingers clutching at the split to keep it from gaping wider.
For a heartbeat you stand frozen, lantern light swinging, breath shallow, your leg half-bared through the torn seam.
You donât have a slip on under this dress, not a proper one. Itâs too hot. Youâve got plain cotton drawers and a whole lot of skin, and you know without looking that the tear has gone high, high enough that if you werenât grabbing it shut heâd be seeing places no man has any business looking at on you.
âYou all right?â Remmickâs closer before you register him moving, his boots whispering over packed dirt. His lantern clanks against a beam as he hangs it up. He reaches for you by pure reflex, hands coming to your arms, steadying you where youâve stumbled.
âIâm fine,â you snap, too quick, humiliation burning your face, neck, chest. âLet go.â
You twist away from his grip, turning your hip, trying to angle the torn side away from him.Â
The dress shifts anyway, hem dragging through straw, and thereâs a flash of thigh where your fingers donât quite cover everything. You feel the rush of blood under your skin like youâve been slapped.
His eyes drop before you can stop them.
Itâs an instinct with him just like yours, hungry and automatic. His gaze hits the split, the glimpse of your leg, and sticks. Time slows down around that look. You see it happen, see the way his pupils widen, see the quick, sharp inhale he tries to hide.
âJesus,â he breathes, almost soundless.
You yank the torn fabric tighter, the motion making the rip strain up higher, edge brushing the curve where your thigh meets your hip. Your whole body feels like a lantern flame, exposed and flickering. âDonât you look,â you hiss, low and furious. âTurn around.â
One of his hands lifts, like he might actually offer to cover the tear for you, fingers curling as if they want to fit over the place youâre guarding. He stops himself, hand hovering for an awful second near your hip, close enough that you feel the heat of him even through the thin cotton.Â
âAinât my fault you went tearinâ yourself open on every nail in the county,â he says, tone trying for light and landing somewhere rougher.Â
His eyes drag up slow, from your knuckles clenched in the fabric, up the bare strip of thigh he already saw, up the shape of your waist and the heave of your chest. âMaybe you should let me look and make sure you didnât cut that pretty skin to ribbons.â
The way he says pretty makes your stomach flip and your teeth set.
âI ainât cut,â you spit. âAnd I sure as hell donât need you inspectinâ me.â
He should look ashamed. Though, he doesnât. Thereâs color high in his cheeks now, not from heat, not from work. His mouthâs gone a little slack, like heâs holding back words. His gaze keeps sneaking back to the place your hand guards, greedy, any time you arenât staring right at him.
âIf you say so,â he murmurs finally. âWouldnât want to offend your delicate sensibilities.â
You hear the echo of his earlier lie in that word, delicate, and decide if you stay here another minute you might do something you canât take back, like slap him or cry or both.
You shift your grip to catch more fabric, bunching the torn side up in your fist so nothing shows. It makes walking harder; youâre hobbling, half-skipping, desperate not to let the skirt fall. âYou see to the mare,â you manage, chin up, eyes burning. âIâll fix my dress.â
He steps back enough to let you pass. As you squeeze by him in the narrow space, your shoulder brushes his chest, your bare calf bumps the hard line of his boot.Â
âCareful,â he says, voice quiet, right by your ear. âWould be a shame if the rest of that dress gave up and left you standinâ in nothinâ at all.â
You donât give him the satisfaction of a reply. You duck your head and hurry out, every step measured so the torn seam doesnât pull, one hand clamped between your thighs, lantern bumping at your knee.Â
The night air on your exposed skin feels wrong, every stray breeze finding its way up under the rip.
You keep your eyes fixed on the glow of the house, on the square of the kitchen window, on anything that is not the barn behind you.
You slam the kitchen door with more force than you mean to, startling your mama awake, mumble something about a nail catching you and make straight for your room. You donât light your own lamp; you donât want to see what he saw. You stand there in the dark with your back to the door and your dress torn open under your hand, heart hammering, ears roaring, shame and something hotter and uglier twisting up together in your belly.
Down by the south fence, in the smaller farmhouse, Remmick sits on the edge of his narrow bed with the easy, humming satisfaction of a man whoâs been saving something up.
He lit the lamp as soon as he stepped in, not out of any real need for light but because he likes the way it throws shadows, likes the way it paints dim gold over bare wood and gives him something soft to look at while his mind runs back over the evening.Â
The room is small and warm from his own body heat, close enough that every breath feels shared with the walls. Old wood, dust, a curl of tobacco from the roll-up he finished outside, and under it all the ghost of you clinging to his clothesâsoap and starch and sweatâmake a thick little stew in the air.
He shrugged out of his shirt as soon as the door shut, tossing it over the chair without bothering to check if the seam you mended had held.Â
The rip in the fabric is nothing next to the rip in your dress that he canât stop savoring. He works the buttons of his trousers loose without hurry, fingers moving with the contented patience of a man about to sit down to a meal heâs been smelling all day.
He doesnât try not to think of you. That would be a waste of a perfectly good night.
He leans back against the wall, boots kicked off, pants open at the fly, and lets the picture come as easy as breath.Â
You in the barn with your hand clapped between your thighs, dress split wide, that slick little strip of thigh flashing when the cloth slipped. The way your eyes flared when you realized heâd seen, outrage and mortification and something bright under both. The sound of your voice when you told him not to look, like you already knew he was going to anyway.
âHell,â he mutters, half laughing under his breath as his cock swells heavy against the thin barrier of his briefs. âAinât nothinâ on this earth Iâd rather think on.â
His palm drifts down over his belly, fingers tracing a slow path to the bulge at his groin. Even that light touch makes him suck in air through his teeth.Â
He presses his hand over the outline of himself, feeling the hot, solid weight of his cock straining upward, and a low, pleased sound curls up out of his chest. He palms it once, a lazy roll, enjoying the way it kicks against his fingers like itâs eager too, then he slides his hand inside.
Warm cotton gives way to hot skin. He wraps his fist around the thick base of himself and exhales like heâs been holding that breath since the barn, relief and hunger tangled up in it. His cock sits heavy in his grip, veins standing up, the head already wet where precum has gathered from how long heâs been walking around hard on the memory of you.
âLook at that,â he murmurs, voice low and rough, thumb smearing that slickness over the swollen tip. âWorked up over one little tear. Youâd laugh yourself sick if you saw me now, wouldnât you?â
The thought of you seeing him like this, spread out on his narrow bed with his trousers open and his cock standing full in his hand, only makes him harder.Â
He drags his fist down slow, savoring the drag from head to base, then back up again, the friction sharp and sweet all at once. The first few strokes are measured, a man settling into a rhythm he plans to enjoy, not something hurried and guilty he has to choke down.
He lets his head tip back against the wall, eyes slipping shut so he can see you better behind his lids.Â
Not the church version, not the good girl with the hem tugged just so and the buttons done up high.Â
The barn version. Lantern light sliding over your bare thigh, the tremble in your fingers when you clutched at the rip, that split second when your hand wasnât fast enough and he got the clean, unearned look heâs been replaying ever since.
âShit,â he breathes, hand tightening, the slide of skin on skin picking up a little speed.Â
He drags his fist down again, slower, getting a feel for every inch, for the way his cock swells harder in his grip with each pass. Arousal slicks his thumb, gathers at the crest of the head, and he spreads it with an easy, greedy little twist, working it around until the slide turns wet and smooth.Â
His hips lift into his own hand without much prompting, body eager after nights of walking around with you on his tongue and in his teeth and under his nails.
âBare leg,â he mutters, watching his hand move now, eyes half-lidded, lashes throwing shadows on his cheeks. âGoinâ about your business like you ainât got that tucked up under your skirt. Like I ainât seen it now.â
He remembers exactly how the tear opened, how the cotton gave and the seam surrendered, how your thigh flashed in the jumpy lantern light.Â
That first raw glimpse lives in his chest like a hot coal. Skin smooth and soft-looking, the curve of muscle under it, the sweet thickness where it met your hip.Â
He remembers your drawers too, plain white cotton clinging to you, riding that line between demure and lewd when the fabric shifted wrong.
His hand moves faster at that, instincts catching up with memory. He curls his fingers a little tighter, pulling from the heavy base up to the slick crown, milking a fresh bead of precum up with each stroke.Â
âBet you went home and stitched that dress up neat as a Sunday virtue,â he says, voice roughened by breath. âHead bowed, lips bit, pretendinâ that leg ainât still there underneath, smooth as cream and just as soft. Bet you canât stop thinkinâ about me seeinâ it neither.â
He can picture you at your little table, lamp burning, needle in hand, fingers trembling just enough to make the thread snag. Your face hot, your mouth set, your thighs pressed together under the cloth as you sew shame into every stitch. He imagines you tugging that seam tight, that same hand that clutched the torn fabric now working the needle, every pull a memory of his eyes on you.
His free hand slides down his belly, fingers pressing over the flexing muscles there, holding them tight as he fucks up into his own fist. The bed creaks under him, wood complaining, but he doesnât slow. He spreads his legs wider on the mattress, giving himself more room to move, and the extra slack lets his strokes lengthen, his hips roll, everything turning into a slow rhythm.
âYou know what I see when I close my eyes?â he asks the ceiling quietly, dragging his thumb across the slit. âNot that pretty little mouth tellinâ me not to look. I see that hand of yours slip. I see that dress fall open just a little more.â
The picture in his mind sharpens: you, back against a stall post, hand too busy clutching at rough wood to hold your skirts closed, light catching on the full line of your thigh as the rip edges skid higher.Â
He imagines the flap of cloth falling aside, full view of your leg from knee to hip, drawers pulled tight over the mound between your thighs, a faint darker patch where heat and sweat have gathered.
His cock throbs in his grip at that. He grits his teeth, pushes his palm down hard, and his hips jerk, chasing the pressure.
âYeah,â he growls softly. âThatâs it. Dress up around your waist, showinâ all that sweet flesh. You holdinâ on to that wood like itâs gonna save you, eyes full of righteous fury while your bodyâs tellinâ on you.â
His fingers slip lower on the stroke, pausing to cup his balls, rolling them in his palm, feeling the tight, heavy pull there. The sensation punches another sound out of him. He goes back to his cock with renewed urgency, arm working harder now, hand pumping.
He lets himself wander further than any real moment has gone. Lets the memory of that tear turn into something else, something he can taste.
He imagines stepping in close before you can bolt, one hand catching your wrist, the other gathering your torn skirt up and out of his way. Imagines your gasp, that little sharp intake he already knows, your bare thigh hitting his hip as he pins you to the stall. Your panties stretched tight over the soft swell of your cunt, his fingers pushing up against the dampening cloth, feeling how hot you are through the barrier.
âPretend you donât want it,â he murmurs, throat rasping. âTry to act like you ainât gettinâ wet for me while you fuss.â
The words sound vulgar and right in his mouth. His cock swells at it, the head aching now, sensitive with every pass. He squeezes at the top, thumb pressing just under the crown, and his whole body shudders, pleasure rushing up his spine.
âBe a good girl,â he hears himself whispering to the woman in his head, the one pressed to barn wood with her dress in tatters. âSpread âem for me, let me see what youâre hidinâ.â
His hand flies now, finding a quick, dirty rhythm. His breath comes rough, each inhale catching, each exhale spilling out in curses and half-formed praises.
âYouâd flush right up to your hairline,â he pants, head rolling against the wall. âAct all offended while your thighs tremble and that pretty thing between âem throbs. Might even cry a little, wouldnât you? All sweet and scared and soaked.â
The image of you cryingâeyes bright, lashes wet, lips bittenâwhile your body betrays you sends him right to the edge. His balls draw up tight, cock jumping in his fist, veins standing out under his skin. Heat coils at the base of his spine, that familiar pull gathering everything in, ready to snap.
He spits into his hand for more slick, doesnât even bother wiping his mouth. The added wetness turns his strokes into something obscene, the sound echoing in the small room. His forearm snaps, muscles burning, chasing the crest bearing down on him.
âCome on then,â he grits. âShow me.â
He imagines hooking a finger under the edge of your drawers and pulling the cotton aside. Imagines the first sight of you bare between your thighs, folds swollen, maybe already glistening, all that heat finally out in the lantern light instead of tucked away in shadows and good manners.
âThatâs it,â he rasps, voice breaking, hips jerking harder into his fist. âKnew youâd be pretty there. Knew youâd be soft.â
The wave hits with no ceremony; it slams through him like a mule kick. His whole body locks, stomach clenching, heels digging into the thin mattress, head thumping dully against the wall.Â
A groan tears out of him, rough and strangled, half-swallowed behind clenched teeth. His cock jerks in his hand, once, twice, then again, spilling hot over his fingers and across his stomach in thick, pulsing ropes.
He rides it out, hand still working, strokes shortening but not stopping, milking every last drop. Cum coats his knuckles, drips over his fist, slicking his grip until his palm slips on the softening length.Â
âFuck,â he breathes when he can breathe again, voice low and wrecked.
His strokes slow, then ease off altogether, fingers loosening their grip.Â
For a moment he just sits there, chest rising and falling, wrist slick and heavy, cock giving a few last, half-hearted twitches in his hand. Sweat cools on his forehead, a bead sliding down along his temple.
He looks down at the mess on his belly, streaks shining in the lamplight, dripping off the side of his hand. Thereâs no disgust in the way he examines it; if anything, thereâs pride. A crooked smile tugs at his mouth, lazy and satisfied.
âLook what you pulled out of me, and you werenât even here,â he murmurs, more pleased than ashamed.Â
He wipes his hand across his stomach, smearing instead of cleaning, fingers drawing idle patterns through the stickiness before he drags them off onto a wadded-up shirt at his side.Â
The cotton takes the worst of it, darkening where it soaks, but he doesnât fuss about the rest. Let it dry on his skin. Let it sit there as a reminder.
He tucks himself back into his briefs, though he doesnât bother fastening his trousers all the way, leaving the fly gaping a little for air.Â
His body feels loose and heavy now, bones sunk deep into the thin mattress. The edge is blunted, that sharp hunger dulled to a warm, low thrum, but itâs not gone.
He leans his head back and lets his eyes drift half-closed, the lamp still burning low.Â
In the quiet, he can almost hear you tossing under your own quilt up the rise, feel the echo of your indignation, imagine the way your fingers might trace absent circles over the mended seam of your dress while you tell yourself you hate him.
He runs his tongue along the back of his teeth, savoring that thought as much as any touch.
âGonna see it torn again,â he says softly, not quite a promise, not quite a threat.Â
The lamp flickers, a tiny flame fighting sleep. Outside, crickets scream and something small scurries through the grass.Â
The little house settles around him with soft creaks and sighs. He closes his eyes fully at last, the picture of your bare thigh and your furious face smoothing together into one sweet, ripe ache heâs already wondering how soon he can taste again.
Most nights Remmick does his rounds like heâs supposed to, lantern swinging at his knee, gate latches checked, fence wire plucked and listened to like strings.Â
But once he knows the map of the place in his bones, once he has counted every post and measured every path, his feet start wandering off the straight lines your daddy would like him to walk.Â
He learns where the shadows fall thickest under the pecan tree by the side yard, where the dark under the eaves hides a man from anyone glancing out through lamplight.Â
He learns just how far back he can stand and still see into the kitchen window when youâre up late, sleeves rolled, forearms wet to the elbow, talking to your mama while you scrub a pan.Â
He learns that when you think everybodyâs settled, you lean your hip against the counter and tilt your head a little while you dry your hands, and that little shift of weight does things to your dress youâd never let it do in town.
He finds out you like the back porch at night even more than you like it at dusk. That when the work is done and your parents are loud in their sleep, you slip out with a glass or a cup and sit with your legs stretched, ankles crossed, toes tracing idle circles on the board beneath them.Â
From the fence line he can see the shine of lamplight on your bare shins when your hem rides up, can see the loose, tired way you soften back into the chair.Â
He watches you tilt your face toward the dark yard like youâre asking it questions it hasnât answered yet, listens to the little sounds you makeâhalf-sighs, half-humsâthat never show up when anyone else is awake.Â
He leans on a post with a cigarette hanging from his fingers and looks until heâs had his fill, no hurry in him, nothing but a lazy, steady satisfaction in knowing you have no idea.
He learns your bedroom window, too. Where it sits in relation to the oak, how far up the slope he has to stand to see its square of light.Â
The first time he notices the curtain isnât quite shut, itâs by accident; heâs walking back late, boots slow on the path, when a slice of movement catches his eye.Â
Curtain gapping, lamp turned low, you moving around your room in that soft circle people make before bed.Â
He stops in the shadow of the tree without even thinking, shoulder to rough bark, the leaves above him murmuring in a wind that doesnât get down into the yard.Â
From there he can see you in fragmentsâan arm as you reach up to unbutton, a brief glimpse of the side of your neck, the line of your shoulder as fabric slips.Â
He tells himself heâll move when youâre done, that heâs only making sure you got in safe. He stays until the lamp goes out.
The night he sees you in the bath, thereâs not even that thin excuse.
Itâs late enough the frogs have worn down to a sleepy chorus and the crickets sound drunk. A low, warm fog sits over the fields, pressing scents in close: damp earth, animals settled in their pens, soap drifting thin from the open kitchen window where somebody forgot to latch it right.Â
Heâs finished his rounds early, all the work of the night sitting behind him instead of ahead, and he feels that restless itch under his skin again, that soft, prowling urge that has nothing to do with fences and everything to do with you.
The house is a square of softer dark against the sky, only a couple of windows holding light.Â
He knows which is which now without having to think about it. Kitchen, front room, your parentsâ room. The little back room off the side where the big galvanized tub sits when somebodyâs been lucky enough to haul enough water.Â
Tonight itâs that one glowing gentle behind its thin cotton curtain, lantern hanging somewhere just out of sight, making the fabric look like a pale, breathing thing.
He circles wide, slipping along the edge of the yard where the grass meets the packed dirt of the lane, where the shadows from the trees throw him one more thin cloak.Â
The bath window is low, glass fogged a little from steam. The curtain is drawn but not all the way, left a thumbâs width open on one sideâenough for light to leak out in a narrow spill. Enough, if a man stepped in close and angled himself just right, to see inside.
He comes up under the sill, breath slow, boots quiet, and lays his palm flat against the siding to steady himself. The boards are cool and rough under his fingers. He leans his shoulder into them and tilts his head, lining his eye up with that careless little gap.
Heat hits him first, a wet, sweet breath rolling out into the night. The lantern inside throws shadows high on the wall, flickering over the curve of the tub, over the length of you in it.
Youâre sunk down in the water with your knees bent, one leg drawn up just enough for him to see the shape of it under the surface, the other stretched straighter, foot braced on the far side.Â
The water glows around you, gone cloudy with soap, clinging in beads to your skin where itâs out of the tub.Â
Your shoulders show above the rim, bare and slick, drops running down in slow trails.Â
Steam curls off your chest, off the slopes of your breasts where they rise from the water, soft and heavy, nipples pebbled tight from the heat or the air or both. The lamplight loves them, catching on every curve, laying little gold crowns on each peak.
Your head is tipped back against the rolled towel youâve wedged between neck and tin, eyes closed, lips parted just enough for breath. One arm drifts along the tubâs edge, fingers dragging lazy patterns through the thin scum of soap there, the other resting across your stomach.
He watches your ribs move with each inhale, the slight swell and fall of your belly under your palm.
You're so unaware of him that it feels almost holy.
He drinks it in like itâs what he came here for all along, no flinch in him, no apology. His gaze roams where it will.Â
From the line of your throat down to the hollow between your collarbones, where a small puddle has gathered and overflowed in slow rivulets; down over the slick, shining hills of your breasts, the way they shift just a little with every breath, the way the waterline cuts across them. Lower, to where the curve of your stomach disappears under the opaque water, hinting at more, promising everything.
You shift, lifting one arm to drag the washcloth over your shoulder. The washcloth trails over the round of your shoulder, down the outside of your arm, across the swell of your breast, nipple tightening even more when the rough cloth skims past.
You donât seem to notice the way your own body responds; youâre too busy chasing day-dirt away, lifting your arm to scrub your neck, tilting your head to give yourself better reach.
From his vantage, he sees everything. His hand tightens on the siding, knuckles going white, that buzzing hunger flaring up bright and hot behind his eyes.
He stares, not making a sound.
You work the cloth down your arm and set it aside, then slide both hands into the water, scooping and pouring over yourself.Â
You lift your leg a little, knee rising higher, water spilling off in sheets, showing him the smooth length of your thigh all the way to the place where it vanishes back under the cloudy surface. The muscles there flex as you shift, your toes stretching, calf defined a moment before settling again.Â
For a brief second, the water thins enough he can see the shadowed shape where your thighs meet, softened by the haze but there, real and mouth-watering.
His eyes go dark on it, pupils swallowing light. He leans in a fraction more, cheek almost touching the glass, breath fogging the edge of the pane where it meets the frame.Â
Every small move you make sends little waves across your body, playing light over the parts he can see, hinting at the parts he canât.
You sigh, the sound faint through the wall but clear. Your head tips a little to the side, cheek turning toward the window without quite facing it.Â
One hand skims over your sternum, following the center line of your body until it disappears under the water.Â
Your fingers paddle lazily there for a moment, moving along your own stomach, over the soft give of your lower belly.Â
He imagines exactly where theyâre drifting, what warm, slick places theyâre brushing, even if youâre not thinking of it like that. Your face gives nothing away but relief, a tired little slackness, the expression of someone finally easing aches out of their bones.
âYou ainât got a clue,â he breathes, lips ghosting the words against the flaking clapboard. Thereâs satisfaction in it, not cruelty. âBathinâ like Eve in a picture book with the curtain open and the devil on the outside lookinâ in.â
His hand, the one not braced on the wall, shifts restlessly by his side, brushing the front of his trousers.Â
He doesnât touch himself proper, not yet; this is looking time. He wants to be empty enough of the last time to fill up on this one entire.Â
His fingers flex anyway, his palm pressing for a moment against the growing bulge, acknowledging it. His cock swells quick and eager, remembering the barn, welcoming the new fodder.
You lean forward to reach the soap, and the angle changes.Â
For a breathless few seconds he gets the long line of your back, the way it curves from nape to waist, the hollow above your hips, the dimples that show when you move just so. Water slides off you in glittering trails, trickling down along your spine, pooling in the small of your back before spilling lower.Â
As you sit back again, that same water slips over the round of your ass where it breaks the surface, catching the light along the curve, then vanishes under the cloudy bath.
He closes his eyes briefly, just to fix it, then opens them again. He doesnât want to miss a thing.
You lather your hands, work the soap into your skin, fingers massaging into your shoulders, down along your collarbones.Â
The more you scrub, the slipperier you become, water beading and running, foam clinging in thin streaks before melting away.Â
When you finally slide your hands under the water, scrubbing lower, your elbows move in a rhythm that makes something low and obscene curl in his gut.Â
He knows youâre only washing, just doing what needs doing, but to him it looks like a preview, looks like a rehearsal of things you havenât yet learned to want.
He watches until the waterline creeps lower on the lantern as the bath cools and you sink down, chasing warmth. Watches as you finally let yourself relax fully, shoulders sliding under, just your face above the surface, eyes closed, breaths slow and even.
Only when you sit forward and reach for the towel hanging on the peg beside the tub does he ease back from the window.Â
He knows if he lingers another second, if he sees you stand, water sheeting off every inch as you step out, heâll plant roots under this sill and never leave.Â
There will be other nights, he tells himself.
He peels himself off the wall, body humming, and slips back into the darker yard, breath still measured, strides easy.Â
By the time heâs at the edge of the light, he has his lantern in hand again, held low, the picture of a man just passing through on his way to some small piece of work.
He doesnât feel a lick of shame. What would be the use of it, when the memory of you in that tub is already lodged in his body like a polished stone, something he can roll under his tongue whenever he chooses.Â
Youâll go to bed clean and soft, thinking maybe about chores and storms and the seam you mended this morning.Â
Heâll go back to his little house with your wet skin behind his eyes and no confusion about what he plans to do with it.
The dayâs been long, the kind that starts with a rooster and ends with your back feeling twice your age.Â
By the time supperâs put away and the kitchen wiped down, your fatherâs in his chair with his boots off, socks so full of holes you donât know why he bothers wearing them, radio mumbling low out of the corner. Your motherâs gone to bed early with a headache, door cracked just enough that you can hear her cough now and again.
Youâre halfway through folding the dish towels when you remember.
Mamaâs good jar of salve.
You can see it plain in your mindâs eye: small tin with the blue lid, the one she guards like treasure.Â
She sent you looking for it just after dinner, when she noticed the raw place on your fatherâs wrist from rope burn and the darkening bruise on your own hip from where the stall rail caught you days ago.Â
Youâd gone to fetch more wood for the stove first, meaning to get the salve on your way back, and somehow it slipped right out of your head, chased off by smoke and scolding and the rush to get biscuits off the fire before they burned.
Your fatherâs already grumbled twice about the barn nail and told you if youâd been paying mind you wouldnât have torn your dress, wouldnât have bruises, wouldnât have needed fussing.Â
You can hear him in the morning if he finds that wrist still angry and your hip still tender. Can hear that disappointed click of his tongue.
Youâd seen him hand the tin to Remmick earlier in the week, mumbling something about âkeep this on hand, boy, in case you tear yourself up,â and watched the new hand tuck it into the pocket of his coat before heading down to the little farmhouse.
âThatâs where it is,â you murmur, more to the quiet kitchen than to anyone. A little knot between your brows loosens when you place it. âDown there.â
You glance at the clock. Itâs late enough the newsmanâs gone off the air, early enough the world hasnât quite tipped into the dead hours where the dark feels thickest.Â
Outside the window, the yard is quiet, the barn a heavy shadow, the smaller house beyond it just a darker square against the field.
âWhereâs that boy?â Your father mutters around his cigarette, not really expecting an answer. âAinât heard him come in for coffee. He out checkinâ fence or sleepinâ on my dime?â
âOut, I reckon,â you say, folding the last towel with a sharp little snap.
Truth is, you havenât heard his boots either. You havenât seen his lantern bob by the window. Itâs been a soft, blank stretch of night, no sign of him.
You tell yourself that means heâs at the far end of the pasture or walking the ditch line. Exactly where heâs supposed to be.
âIâll fetch Mamaâs salve,â you add, already untying your apron, tucking it over the back of a chair. âSheâll want it first thing in the morninâ.â
Joe nods, smoke curling out of his nose. âDonât you linger,â he says, not looking up. âGet what you need and bring your tail back in this house. I donât want you down there visitinâ like itâs social hour.â
You bite back the urge to say youâd sooner visit the pig pen. âYes, sir,â is what comes out instead.
The night air catches you on the porch, damp and soft, smelling of cooling dirt and a hint of something sweet blooming out by the fence.Â
You step down barefoot, skirts whispering around your calves, the boardsâ splinters familiar against your soles. The big houseâs light spills just to the bottom of the steps, then gives up, letting the yard roll out into dark.
The little farmhouse sits a ways off, past the well, past the worn track where the wagon turns. All its windows are black. No orange seam under the curtain, no silhouette rising and falling against the glass. The barn is quiet too, doors thrown shut, only a thin line of moon-silver along the roof.
You latch onto the sight of that dark little house like proof. Heâs not there. Heâs out somewhere with a lantern and a bad attitude.Â
Youâll be in and out before he knows youâve even left your room.
You wrap that thought around yourself like a shawl and start across the yard.
The grass is cool and a little slick with dew under your feet, clinging between your toes. Crickets saw at the edges of things, frogs mutter down in the low spots. The wellâs stone lip rises out of the ground like something old and patient; you ghost past it, keeping your eyes on the squat shadow of the farmhouse.
Up close, it looks smaller, somehow meaner. The door is shut, the porch bare save for his boots lined up neat off to one side. You take in that detail with a little flick of reliefâboots off means man in bed, not loose in the yardâbefore another thought slides in behind it: or just inside.
You hesitate only a heartbeat.
The want to not get scolded in the morning, the want to have Mamaâs salve where she can lay hands on it, outweighs the whisper of sense telling you this is foolish.
You lay your palm on the door and push.
It gives with a small, tired creak, the smell of the place rolling over you in a warm wave: wood, straw, tobacco, sweat, and that faint metallic thread youâve started to think of as his alone. Thereâs a lamp turned low on the table just inside, wick pinched till the flame is barely more than a coal in a glass throat, enough to lay out the shapes of things and nothing more.
âRemmick?â you call, voice barely above a whisper, more habit than hope. When nothing answersânot a word, not a shift of boardsâyou let your breath out slow and step over the threshold.
The door eases halfway shut behind you, not latched. You donât bother with it; you donât plan to be here long enough to worry about whatâs open and what isnât.Â
The room is small and spare, just like your daddy said it was. Bed against one wall, blanket rumpled from someone sitting, if not lying. Chair with a coat thrown over the back, shirt draped careless on top. Table with the lamp, a chipped cup, a folded knife. A shelf holding a few tin plates, a jar of coffee, the heel of a loaf.
You move quick but careful, eyes trying not to linger on the smaller things that say a manâs been living hereâhis belt coiled on the chair seat, his hat hanging from the peg, the empty space on the floor where his boots were.Â
You head straight for the coat, remembering your fatherâs hand dropping the salve tin into its pocket.
You pinch the fabric between your fingers, easing it aside, but the weight you expect to tug at the hem isnât there. The coat hangs light. You pat the pockets; theyâre empty, save for a wadded rag and a stray button.
âDamn,â you breathe, annoyed, under your breath.
Maybe he moved it. Maybe he took it out so the tin wouldnât fall and get lost when he shrugged the coat on.
You cast your eyes around the room, searching high shelves, low boxes, any place someone might set a small, important thing.
The table catches your attention next. You circle it, gaze skimming over the knife, the cup, the lamp.Â
There, near the edge, half in shadowâa squat little tin no bigger than your palm, blue lid dulled with age.
You smile in spite of yourself and reach for it. âGot you,â you murmur, closing your fingers around the cool metal.
You pop the lid just enough to see the salve inside, pale and thick, smelling faintly of herbs and camphor, then press it back down with a soft click. The jobâs done. Simple as that.
You turn, already thinking about the path back to the house, about slipping this into Mamaâs hand and letting yourself be proud she wonât have to wonder where it is in the morning.
You donât make it two steps.
There he is.
Standing in the doorway that leads to the small back room, shoulder braced against the frame like heâs been leaning there a while, like he grew right up out of the wood.
Heâs shirtless, skin slicked faint with sweat, the rise and fall of his chest slow and easy. Suspenders hang loose against his hips, clipped to his trousers but fallen off his shoulders, framing the cut of his torso in dark lines.Â
The lampâs low light paints him in gold and shadow both, dipping into the hollow between his collarbones, skating over the plane of his stomach, catching on the trail of hair that runs down from his navel into the waistband of his pants.Â
His arms cross over his chest, veins standing faint along the backs of his hands where they rest against his biceps.
His feet are bare. His eyes are not gentle.
âFind what you was lookinâ for?â he asks, voice soft, too soft, the scrape of it wrapping around the words like a touch.
Your heart gives one wild jump, slamming up against your ribs hard enough to hurt, then starts to run.Â
You hadnât heard him come in. Hadnât heard the back door, hadnât heard the floor protest, hadnât heard anything but your own little fussing search and the tiny pop of the salve lid.
For a foolish second you think about hiding the tin, tucking it behind your back like a child caught in a pantry. You donât. Thereâs nowhere to put it he wouldnât see, and you refuse to give him the pleasure of watching you scramble.
Instead you hold it up just enough that he can see the blue lid glint in the lamplight. âMy mamaâs salve,â you say, surprised at how even your voice comes out. âDaddy gave it to you. He forgot where he put it. I came to fetch it.â
He doesnât move. Doesnât look at the tin for more than a passing glance. His attention stays on you, heavy as a hand between your shoulder blades. He rakes his gaze from your face down to the salve, then lower, slow as a man looking over a field heâs about to plow.
You suddenly know exactly how your dress is sittingâwhere the fabric pulls across your chest from turning too quick, where the skirt clings to your thighs from the damp in the grass, where your collar gapes just a breath more than it should because you didnât bother with the top button in the heat. Your skin prickles under each place you picture his eyes touching.
âYou always just walk yourself into a manâs house without knockinâ?â he asks after a beat, one brow ticking up.
âThis ainât a house,â you reply, chin lifting a shade. âItâs a shack my father stuck you in so youâd be closer to the barn.â
Something like amusement flickers across his mouth. âStill mine for now,â he says. âDoor was shut, wasnât it?â
âYou left the lamp on,â you shoot back. âAnybody with decent sense would take that as invitation in case of emergency.â
He uncrosses his arms then, letting them drop to his sides. The motion makes muscles jump in his chest, the lines of his shoulders shifting under skin. âAnd whatâs the emergency, miss?â he asks. âThat your mamaâs medicine was sittinâ ten yards farther than you like it?â
His tone isnât mocking. It isnât kind either. Itâs something in between, something testing. Like heâs poking at you with words just to feel where youâre soft.
You swallow, the salve tin suddenly heavy in your hand. âI said why I came,â you answer. âIâll be goinâ now.â
You move to head toward the front door, the one you came in, but the room is small, and he doesnât move. One pace brings you close enough to smell him. Another pace would put you near enough to brush him if you misjudged your route.
He shifts his weight to fill the doorway more fully, one hand lifting to rest on the frame to the side of him. It leaves his ribs bare, that patch of hair under his arm catching the lamplight. Thereâs a faint scar along his flank, pale against the warmth of his skin, old and ugly, like something tore him open once and he lived anyway.
âSeems a shame,â he says, looking at you. âYou cominâ all this way just to snatch up a tin and run.â
Your pulse hammers harder. âIt ainât far.â
âFor you,â he agrees. âFor me itâs a long, lonely walk most nights. I might be grateful for a little company.â
âYou got company,â you say, words a little sharper than you intend. âYou got every cow, every dog, every fence post on this land. You donât need me.â
He lets that roll over him like water off a duckâs back. âMaybe Iâm tired of talkinâ to things that canât talk back,â he murmurs. His eyes flick down to the salve again, then to your hand, to your wrist where your pulse beats visible in the hollow. âYou tore yourself up any today, or you just borrowinâ this for show?â
âBruise on my hip,â you admit before you can remind yourself you owe him nothing. The words come out stiff. âAinât your concern.â
âEverythinâ that happens on this farmâs my concern when it means workers showinâ up busted in the morninâ,â he says. âYou do work, donât you? Or are you just here to keep the place pretty.â
Heat flashes through you, quick and mean. âYou've seen me work,â you say. âYou've seen me at that pump, at that stove, out in the yard. Donât you stand there half-dressed and ask if I do my share.â
His mouth twitches at half-dressed. He doesnât bother to hide the way his gaze drops, quick, down the front of himself and back up, as if to say he knows exactly how much heâs wearing and how much youâre seeing. Itâs deliberate, that small, shameless acknowledgement of his own body.
âBelieve me,â he says, voice dropping lower, âIâve seen you.â
The words land between you, heavy and thick. They mean more than they say. Every peek heâs stolen presses into the space they open up: your bare leg in the barn, your shoulders shining in the bath, your tired posture on the back porch, one strap slipping careless down your arm before you hitched it back up.
You donât know about most of that. What you do know is enough to make your throat go dry.
âI ainât supposed to be down here visitinâ,â you say, trying to wrestle the conversation back onto some ground that feels steadier. âMy father told you that when you got here. Told me too.â
His eyes gleam at the mention of your father, some dark amusement sparking there. âHe told me to show you respect,â he says. âAnd I have. Havenât laid a hand on you that you didnât walk too close to yourself.â
Your mind trips over the memory of his fingers catching your arm in the barn, steadying you when your mare spooked. The way his hand hovered near your torn dress, heat just shy of your hip. The way he stood in the yard with his eyes on your mouth and called you miss like it was something he wanted to lick.
You draw yourself up as tall as you can manage in the little room, salve tin tight in your grip, refusing to yield the step heâs trying to take without moving his feet. âThen youâll move,â you say, voice low but steady. âSo I can go on home and keep livinâ my life with all that respect youâre so proud of.â
For a moment, you think he might laugh in your face. His lips part, teeth catching on his bottom lip, eyes glinting.
Instead he just looks at you.
Itâs worse than if heâd laughed. He looks like a man deciding how honest he feels like being tonight. Like heâs weighing whether to keep playing at politeness or lay something sharper on the table between you.
The lamplight flickers, shadow jumping along his jaw as he tilts his head. âYou walk out that door,â he says finally, nodding toward the porch, âand Iâll let you. I ainât gonna drag you nowhere you donât step first.â
Relief and something colder flick through you at the same time. âGood,â you start to say, but he isnât done.
âBut,â he adds, and that one little word lands heavy, âyou come walkinâ into my place after dark again, all alone, dressed like that, lookinâ at me like you donât know whether you wanna slap me or cry on meâwell.â His gaze drops to your mouth and back. âThatâs you steppinâ. And Iâll take it as such.â
Your heart stutters, one hard misstep in its rhythm. âYou overestimate yourself,â you snap, even as your fingers twitch on the tin.
He smiles then, slow and wolfish, the expression finally reaching his eyes in a way you havenât seen yet.Â
âWeâll see,â he says.
For a long, tight second, nobody moves. The walls feel closer, the air thicker, the lamplight too intimate. You hear the frogs outside, the creak of the house settling, the little wet sound of your own swallow. His bare chest rises and falls, steady, like heâs got all the time in the world.
Then he steps to the side.
The doorway opens up behind him, a narrow slice of night visible over his bare shoulder. Itâs more space than you expected him to yield, less than youâd like.
You duck past, your shoulder nearly brushing his chest, the heat pouring off him making your skin prickle. You feel his eyes on the side of your face, on the line of your throat, on the way you have to hitch your skirt just a little to keep from tripping as you step over the threshold.
âGoodnight, miss,â he says softly, right by your ear, breath warm as it ghosts over your neck. âYou be careful now. Darkâs full of things you donât know about.â
You donât trust your voice not to shake, so you donât give him the satisfaction of hearing it. You just walk, bare feet hitting the packed earth hard, fingers biting into the salve tin so tight the metal cuts a little crescent into your palm.
Rough wood presses into your hips, edge digging a little where your nightgownâs ridden up, breath catching in short, shallow pulls because heâs got one big hand flat between your shoulder blades, holding you there, and the other is on your ass, fingers clawed into the thin cotton, bunching it up and away from your thighs.Â
The lamp in the corner throws a low, mean light over the kitchen, just enough to show you the knot in the tabletop and the chipped plate someone left on the shelf, just enough to catch the shadow of his arm when it moves.
You came down here hot with it. Anger, mostly.Â
At him for looking at you how he does, for crowding doorways and talking low in your ear. At yourself for feeling anything besides disgust when he does it.Â
For weeks that feeling has sat under your skin like a burr under a saddle, rubbing everything rawâevery brush of his eyes, every sly comment, every late-night glimpse of his lantern out in the yard when you shouldâve been sleeping.Â
Tonight it tipped over. Tonight you lay in your bed and stared at the ceiling and saw his bare chest in that little house instead, heard his voice saying weâll see, felt your own body answer in a way that wouldnât quit.
So you got up after the house went quiet, barefoot on the boards, heart in your throat.Â
You didnât bring a lamp. You told yourself you were just going to tell him off, to say plain that you didnât want him looking, didnât want him speaking to you sideways, didnât want the innuendo and the smirks and the way he made you feel peeled without ever laying a proper hand on you.Â
That was the story you wrapped yourself in as you crossed the yard, nightgown clinging to your knees.
He opened the door before you could knock, like heâd been standing right on the other side with his palm on the handle, listening.
You remember the way his eyes moved over you, slow, no shirt, just those loose trousers hanging low on his hips, lamp behind him making his shoulders look broad and his face unreadable.Â
You remember his mouth forming your name, quiet and satisfied, like heâd been waiting to say it like this.Â
You remember the way all that anger and want surged up together in your chest, wild and tangled, and how you said something too sharp, voice shaking, about him needing to keep his eyes to himself if he wanted to stay on your daddyâs land.
Now here you are with his hand on your back, pressing, holding you down exactly where you cameâover his small scarred table in his small farmhouse kitchenâyour own fingers gripping the edge in a white-knuckled clutch.
âThought you werenât supposed to be down here visitinâ,â he drawls above you, breath warm near your ear, words rolling over your spine. âThat what you told me?â
You glare at the knot in the wood like it did you personal harm.Â
Your face is hot, your body even hotter, a slow, heavy throb deep between your thighs that started halfway across the yard and hasnât done a thing but grow.Â
âI ainât visitinâ,â you say, the words a little muffled by the way heâs got you folded. âI came to talk sense into you.â
His laugh is low and pleased, hand on your back sliding a little, fingers spreading, thumb settling along your spine. He presses down just enough to remind you whoâs holding you where you are.Â
âIs that what you call it,â he says, âshowinâ up in your bed things after dark, sneakinâ through my door with your hands empty and your eyes wide? Talkinâ sense?â
His other hand cups your ass through the thin fabric, palm wide over you, squeezing like heâs testing a piece of fruit at the market.Â
The nightgown has twisted up, hem caught high over your hips, leaving the bottom curve of you bare to his touch, only the cotton of your drawers between his fingers and your skin.Â
Heat floods that spot, a sharp, shameful pulse that makes your breath catch.
âYou been walkinâ around twitchy as a cat for days,â he goes on, hand kneading, thumb digging into the give of your flesh there. âSnappinâ at me, snappinâ at your daddy, gettinâ that look on your face every time you see me like you donât know whether to spit or spit somethinâ else.â
âShut up,â you hiss, mortified at how true it feels in your bones.Â
You shift your hips, trying to wriggle away from that hand, and all it does is grind you back against his palm, soft cotton dragging over the swell of you, catching on the seam that runs right over the place youâre trying not to think about.
He makes a sound at that, low in his throat, rough and appreciative. âYeah. There she is,â he says, words coming a little thicker now. âAll that fire. You walked your own self down here, girl. Nobody dragged you.â
âI came to tell you to stop,â you manage, though the way your voice climbs at the end takes the bite out of it. His fingers curl, grab a little handful of your ass cheek through the cloth, and you feel the ache spike hotter. âStop lookinâ. Stop talkinâ like that. Stopâstopââ
âStop makinâ you feel all twisted up?â he supplies, not unkind, just plain.Â
His hand on your back softens, spreads, rubbing along your spine like heâs soothing a spooked animal even as the other keeps kneading at you.Â
âStop remindinâ you thereâs more to be had in this world than hymns and beans and mendinâ?â
You suck a breath in through your teeth. âYou ainât the only man alive,â you snap. âYou ainât special.â
His grip tightens, a hard squeeze that makes you gasp. âNo,â he agrees easily. âBut Iâm the only one you marched down here to cuss out in your bare feet and nightclothes, so Iâd say Iâm doinâ something right.â
You hate how your body answers that, how something low in you liquefies at the thought of it, at the truth you donât want to name. You hate the way your thighs press together of their own accord, seeking pressure, seeking relief, even as you hold yourself rigid under his hand.
He feels it. His palm slides down, fingers curling under the heavy curve of you, thumb dragging along the crease where your ass meets the top of your thigh.Â
Youâre hyper-aware of every inch, every callus on his skin, every place the old wood digs into your hips. When his hand moves inward, fingers bumping close to the center of you, you flinch.
âDonâtââ you start, panic and want knitting together, but the word thins out when his touch presses just a little firmer over the damp cotton there.
âYouâre soaked,â he says softly, no mockery in it, just raw, hungry wonder. âWalked through my door mad as sin, all full of pretty speeches, and your cuntâs already cryinâ for somethinâ to hold on to.â
Shame scorches up your neck. âDonât call it that,â you choke, mortified, the word hitting you deep and low and making everything worse.
He hums, thumb tracing a slow circle over that swell, pressing right where the cloth is clinging. The pressure is perfect, unbearable.Â
âWhat you want me to call it, then?â he asks, voice brushing the shell of your ear now.Â
âYour virtue? Your purity? That sweet spot between your legs that ainât nobody touched?â His thumb moves again, firmer, and your hips jolt against your will. ââCause I see it all over you, darlinâ. You came here wantinâ me to stop, but your body came here wantinâ somethinâ else entirely.â
You shake your head, even as your toes curl, even as your lungs drag in another sharp breath that tastes like him and the lamp smoke and the hot, close air of this little house.Â
âYouâreâyouâre foul,â you say, but it comes out thin, breathy. âYou been lookinâ at me, watchinâ me, talkinâ to me likeââ
âLike I know what to do with you,â he cuts in, a hint of impatience threading through his heat. âAnd I do. You think I donât see whatâs eatinâ at you every time you glance down at my hands, or my mouth, or lower?â
His fingers slide along the seam of your drawers, finding the little ridge where cloth meets cloth and pressing right there.Â
It sends a jolt through you big enough you canât muffle the small sound that drops out of your throat.Â
His hand on your back pushes down, keeping you bent, letting you grind into that touch without rising off the table.
âListen here,â he says, voice roughening, patience fraying. âYou came. Youâre here. You can tell me to stop and I will. I ainât gonna take what you donât hand me. But donât stand there in my house, drippinâ on my floor, and try to lie about what youâre feelinâ.â
The room seems to shrink around those words.Â
You know heâs right. You also know how far you are from where you were supposed to be, from the girl who said sheâd never let a man like him get close, from the girl who swore sheâd keep herself intact till some tidy, respectable husband came along with a ring and a house and his hat in his hands.
You think about those men. Faces youâve seen in church, in town, men who look at you when they think youâre not noticing with a hunger they donât know what to do with. Men whoâd apologize if their fingers brushed your wrist too long.
Then you think about this man, bare-chested behind you, hard and unashamed, his hand pressed between your shoulder blades, the other on you like youâre his to handle.Â
You think about his eyes in the barn, on your torn dress. About the words he said in this very room, about stepping. About how youâve been walking around with your jaw clenched and your thighs pressed together ever since.
âTell me the truth,â he says, thumb pressing a little harder, his other fingers spread wide over the swell of you. âYou want me to let go of you and send you back up that hill with your temper, you say it. Iâll move. You can go pray extra loud come Sunday.â
The lamp crackles softly, a tiny sound in the heavy dark.
âAnd if I donât?â you hear yourself ask, voice small but steady. âIf I say I donât want you to move?â
His hand stills on your back for one beat, then both of them tightenâone pressing you down, one grabbing a handful of your ass like heâs staking a claim. A breath leaves him in a long, shuddery exhale that ghosts hot over your neck.
âThen Iâm gonna take real good care of what you brought me,â he says, tone gone hoarse and thick, the restraint in it the only thing keeping you from shaking. âGonna give you somethinâ to think about next time you lay awake in that bed of yours. Gonna fuck you on this table till you donât remember what you came down here mad about.â
The word fuck lands hard in you, a punch and a promise all at once.Â
You grip the edge of the wood like itâs all thatâs keeping you upright, though youâre already bent, already braced.
âSay it,â he murmurs, leaning in until his chest brushes your back, bare skin hot where it touches the thin cotton.Â
The admission sits in your throat like a hot stone. It feels enormous. It feels like stepping off a ledge.
âI wantââ The word catches, but his thumb flicks over you again, sharp and sure, and your hips roll without permission, a little helpless grind that betrays every fight youâve been waging with yourself. âI want you,â you gasp, shame and relief crashing together. âI want you toâto do somethinâ about it.â
He lets out a sound thatâs almost a groan, almost a laugh, almost a curse, his body crowding you tighter, his weight a solid wall of heat at your back. âThatâs my girl,â he says, and the possession in it makes your knees wobble, makes that core of you clench hard around nothing.
His hand leaves your back long enough to grab a fistful of your nightgown at the hem, yanking it up in one rough motion that leaves it bunched around your waist.Â
Cool air hits your drawers, the bare backs of your thighs, the soft part just under your cheeks, and then his palm is there, skin to skin at last, cupping you hard.Â
His fingers dig in, thumbs pressing outward, spreading you slightly, mapping the give.
âYouâre shakinâ,â he says, sounding pleased. âAinât even touched you proper yet.â
âYouâre takinâ your time,â you manage, though the words shake too.
He chuckles, low. âFirst timeâs never good when a man rushes,â he answers, matter-of-fact. âAnd I know you ainât had nobody in you yet, feelinâ the way you do under my hand.â
Before you can answer, his fingers hook into the waistband of your drawers and tug. The fabric resists for a second, elastic biting into soft flesh, then slides down, dragging over your hips, over the swell of your ass, down the backs of your thighs until they tangle around your knees.Â
He leaves them there, trapping your legs just enough you canât kick or close up, just enough that youâre open and vulnerable and aware of it.
Cool air kisses you everywhere the cloth just left.Â
You feel filthy, bare from waist to mid-thigh, bent over his table with your nightgown rucked up, your cunt exposed to the room, to him. It makes your head swim.
Then his hand is back, and there is no room for anything else.
He cups you from behind, fingers sliding through the slick heat of your folds, and you hear a sharp breath hitch out of him. âOh, hell,â he says, reverent.
You make a broken, helpless sound that doesnât sound like it belongs to you.Â
No oneâs ever been there before, not like this, not with fingers spreading you, rubbing through you, middle finger catching on that aching bud youâve only ever touched in the dark with guilty hands.Â
The sensation is lightning-bright, stabbing up your spine.
âEasy,â he murmurs, palm flattening across your low back again, his body curving over yours, caging you. âI got you. Gonna make it good for you before I stretch you around me. Donât want you too scared to enjoy your first fuck.â
The way he says first fuck, like heâs staking a flag there, like heâs carving his name into it, makes something fierce flicker through you, a strange pride knotting up with the fear.Â
You push back against his hand without meaning to, chasing more.
He feels it. âThatâs it,â he encourages, fingers pressing deeper between your lips now. âAsk for what you want with that pretty body. Tell me where it hurts.â
âEverywhere,â you pant, honesty ripped out of you on a wave. âIt hurts everywhere.â
He laughs, breath hot against your neck, mouth close enough you feel the shape of it. âThat ainât hurt, girl,â he says. âThatâs need.âÂ
His fingers finally find your entrance, slick and hot and clutching, and he presses the pad of one inside, just the tip, testing. Your whole body clenches around that intrusion.
âYou relax for me,â he tells you, tone sliding into something commanding. âBreathe.â
You suck in air, lungs burning.Â
He slides the finger in a little further, thick and probing, opening you.Â
The stretch is sharp, uncomfortable, but thereâs an undercurrent of relief in it. He works it in and out slowly, letting you get used to the feel, letting your body learn the shape of him.
âThatâs good,â he murmurs when he feels you soften around him, the praise lighting up something small and hungry in your chest. âSee? You take my finger just fine. Gonna take my cock too when Iâm done with you.â
He adds a second finger before you can brace, and this time the stretch makes you gasp loud, muscles clamping down. It burns, a deep, insistent ache, like youâre being pried open.
âShh,â he soothes, his index finding that little bundle of nerves again, circling steady, sending sparks to chase the hurt. âI know. I know. We gotta loosen you up some or youâll split yourself on me.â
The blunt truth of it makes you squeeze your eyes shut, face hot against your forearm.Â
You can feel him behind you, solid, his chest glued to your back, his arm moving between your legs. When you manage to breathe past the initial shock, the burn eases, replaced by a full, pressurized feeling that fills your head with nothing but sensation.
He moves his fingers, slow at first, pumping them in and out of you in short strokes, stretching, coaxing.Â
Your body starts to answer despite itself, hips rocking back in tiny motions, seeking that deep, sweet drag.Â
Every thrust brushes against something inside you that makes your legs tremble, makes your breath hitch.Â
âListen to that,â he says, voice thick, and it takes you a second to realize he means the wet sound loud in the little kitchen as his fingers work in and out of you. âYou hear yourself takinâ me in? Thatâs you wantinâ it.â
Itâs filthy and true and you canât deny it.Â
There's a coil tightening low in your belly, every nerve in your body funneling to where his hand is. Your grip on the table edge goes slippery with sweat.
âRemmick,â you gasp, not even sure what youâre asking for, only that youâre strung too tight.
âThere you go,â he groans, fingers driving a little deeper, curling just right.
It hits without much warning. One second youâre climbing, the next youâre over the edge, everything snapping.Â
Your body seizes around his fingers, clenching so hard it almost hurts, that coil unspooling in a rush of pleasure so intense it blanks your mind.
A breathless moan tears up your throat. Your thighs shake, knees nearly buckling, if it werenât for his hand on your back and the table under your palms youâd be on the floor.
âThatâs it,â he groans, riding you through it, fingers still working, still moving until youâre whimpering, too sensitive, twitching with each little aftershock.Â
You sag against the table when it finally lets you go, chest heaving, sweat cooling on your neck. He eases his fingers out of you slow, gentle for the first time since you walked in, his hand sliding up to rest on your hip. You can feel his other hand at your back again, rubbing small circles, keeping you grounded.
âFirst oneâs always a little wild,â he says, sounding almost fond. âYou doinâ all right?â
You nod, or try to. Your head feels full of cotton, floaty and heavy all at once. âIââ Your voice comes out hoarse. You clear your throat. âIâm fine.â
âYouâre more than fine,â he says, and thereâs a smile in it. âYouâre perfect.â He shifts behind you, and thatâs when you feel it, really feel itâhis cock pressed up against the back of your thigh through the fabric of his trousers.Â
Heâs been hard this whole time, you realize dimly, all that while he was working you open. The blunt head drags over your skin when he adjusts, the thickness of him obvious even through cloth.
Your stomach flips, fear and anticipation knotting together. âYouâre reallyââ
âOh, Iâm really.â He sounds almost amused. âYou wanted me to take you on this table, remember?âÂ
His hand leaves your back and you hear the soft, familiar sound of a belt coming loose, a buckle clinking, the rasp of leather through belt loops. Then buttons, quick and practiced, fabric shifting.
You suck in a breath, every sense straining.
A moment later, something hot and slickânot his fingers this timeânudges against your entrance. He slides the head of his cock through your slick folds slowly, up and down, coating himself in you, bumping your clit on the downstroke, making you twitch.
âJesus,â he mutters, more to himself than you. âYou feel that? How youâre grabbinâ at me already and I ainât even in?â
You do feel it, and itâs terrifying. Your body recognizes him as something itâs meant to hold, meant to take, even as your mind stumbles over the size of him, over what this means.
âIâwait,â you say, panic flaring for a second, the reality of it looming. âRemmick, Iâmââ
âI know,â he says, and for once thereâs no teasing in it. âYou listen to me. Itâs gonna burn at first, then itâs gonna feel like you never shouldâve gone without it this long. You trust me?â
You hesitate. He feels it in the way your muscles tense around the head of him. His hand comes up, fingers wrapping loosely around your throat from behind, thumb tipping your chin just a little. The touch sends a different kind of shiver through you, sharp and grounding.
âI ainât gonna break you,â he says quietly, close to your ear. âI want you cominâ back to this just as bad as I want you right now.â His hips roll just enough that the blunt tip presses hard against your opening.Â
The hand at your throat, the tone in his voice, the memory of his fingers and the way your body just came apart on them thirty seconds agoâthey all crash together, and you find yourself nodding before you know youâre doing it.
âGo,â you whisper, the word trembling, but there.
He makes a sound then thatâs half-growl, half-groan, all man. His grip on your throat tightens just a hair, his other hand clamping down on your hip.
âThatâs my girl,â he says again, rough with need. âHold on.â
The head of him breaches you with more resistance than his fingers ever met.Â
Your body tries to clamp down, to keep him out, muscles fighting the stretch. He doesnât slam in, but he doesnât baby you either. He works himself in slow, steady pressure, teeth gritted, hips driving forward inch by thick inch.
The burn is real. Itâs sharp, like youâre being split open from the inside. You gasp, nails scraping at the wood, whole body bowing. For a second itâs too much.
âBreathe,â he grunts through his own strain, hand at your throat sliding up to your jaw, thumb pressing at your cheek. âBreathe through it. Youâre takinâ me. Look at you. Youâre takinâ me.â
He isnât wrong. Beneath the pain, thereâs this breathless aweâat the size of him, at the way your own body yields, at the feel of being filled in a way you never have before.Â
You force yourself to inhale, exhale, again, again. Your muscles flutter around him, protesting, then slowly easing.
When the broadest part of his head passes the tight ring of your entrance, the rest slides in easier, still stretching, still burning, but less violently.Â
He sinks deeper, stopping only when his hips are flush with your ass, his pelvis pressed to your backside, balls snugged up against your cunt. You can feel him everywhere, heavy and solid in your core, pulsing faintly.
âChrist,â he rasps, the words hot against your neck. âI can barely think straight. Sweet girl, you just swallowed every inch of me.â
You exhale shakily, overwhelmed. Full doesnât begin to cover it. You feel stuffed, stretched to the point of coming apart, and yet under the ache, something else is already startingâa low, thick pleasure that moves like honey, spreading outward from where youâre joined.
He holds still for a long moment, breathing hard into your hair, chest rising and falling against your back. His hand at your hip rubs little circles, the one at your jaw softening its grip.
âYou tell me when it stops hurtinâ so sharp,â he says. âI ainât in no rush, even if my cockâs yellinâ otherwise.â
You try to focus. The worst of the burn ebbs, leaving a throbbing soreness, but the sense of himâdeep, impossible, yoursâis starting to bloom into something almost good.
âMove,â you whisper, surprising yourself. âJust a little.â
He laughs, breath short. âGreedy already,â he says. âAlright.â
He pulls back, just an inch, maybe two, dragging that thick length along your walls. The friction is intense, raw and tender and electric all at once. Then he pushes in again, slower, watching for any flinch.Â
Your fingers dig into the table, but you donât cry out, donât tell him to stop. Your body clutches at him on the way out, sucks at him on the way back in.
He does it again. And again. Each shallow thrust smooths the hurt a little more, replaces it with deeper sensation. The initial sting fades into a deep, stretching fullness that makes your knees weak, that makes heat lick up your spine in waves.
âThatâs it,â he murmurs, hand sliding from your jaw back down to your throat, wrapping around it more firmly this time, not cutting your air, just pinning you, reminding you where you are and whoâs holding you. âNow weâre gettinâ somewhere.â
He lengthens his strokes, pulling back farther, pushing in harder. The wet slap of his hips meeting your ass starts up, quiet at first, then louder, the sound of skin on skin obscene in the still night.Â
Every push drives him deeper, nudging at something inside you that makes your breath jump, that sends little shocks through your belly, like heâs bumping the edge of something tender and secret and his.
Your body has learned the shape of him, stretching you from the inside.Â
You can feel every ridge, every vein, the way the fat head spears through the tight clutch of you and then disappears into that deep, hot place that was empty your whole life and now is nothing but him.
His hand at your throat tightens, just a little. Not enough to cut your air, but enough to make each breath a thing you have to pull for, chest heaving against the table edge. His palm is broad and warm, thumb resting under your jaw, fingers curved along the side of your neck.Â
Every time his hips snap forward, that grip reminds you heâs there; it pins you in your own skin so you canât float away from whatâs happening, canât pretend itâs anything but what it is: you getting fucked open on a manâs cock in his kitchen like you were meant for it.
Then his hand drops. It slides down the column of your throat, over the dip of your collarbone, fingers spreading wide as they drag lower, rough palm grazing the top swell of your breast through the thin cotton.Â
He cups you from behind, big hand wrapping around the weight of it, lifting, squeezing. The nightgown bunches under his fingers as he kneads, thumb rolling over your nipple until it stiffens hard, the fabric rasping just enough to make you whine.
âThere,â he mutters, voice gone thick, like he has to taste every part of you. âKnew theseâd feel good in my hand.â
He squeezes once more, harder, the pressure sending a sharp line of sensation straight down to where heâs buried in you, your nipple trapped between his thumb and the heat of his palm.Â
Your back arches, pushing more of your tit into his grip even as his cock grinds deeper.Â
For a second youâre caught between the drag inside and the rough, greedy hold on your breast, pleasure ricocheting between the two.
Then his hand is moving again, leaving your aching nipple peaked under the cotton, skimming back up over your breastbone, returning to your throat like it owns the place. His fingers curl back into their collar around your neck, thumb settling under your jaw, holding you where he wants you while his hips keep driving.
âListen to you,â he groans, and you realize he doesnât just mean your voiceâwrecked and breaking on every inhaleâbut the wet, filthy noise your bodyâs making, the slick drag of his cock pulling out of you, the obscene squelch when he pushes back in, the slap of his balls hitting the curve of your cunt. âYou hear that? Thatâs this pussy lovinâ every inch Iâm givinâ her.â
The word makes your stomach flutter and your cunt clench down around him so tight he curses, hips stuttering.Â
Thereâs no room for modesty now; everything between your legs is wide awake and telling on you.Â
Every time he pulls back, your inner muscles chase after him, hugging, clinging, like youâre frightened of losing that fullness, like your bodyâs praying heâll push right back inâand he does, like heâs answering a call.
He adjusts his stance, feet shifting on the rough floor, and angle changes. The next thrust lands different, deeper, the thick head of him driving up and forward to grind against a spot inside you that makes your vision white out around the edges for a beat.Â
You jolt, a strangled noise ripping out of you, fingers scraping along the tabletop as your whole body goes tense.
âThere it is,â he pants, catching that reaction, chasing it.Â
He does it again on purpose, hips rolling instead of just snapping, driving that same path, making sure he hits that spot with the crown every time.Â
âYou feel that? Right there? Thatâs what you been needinâ, girl. That ache way up high you ainât never had a name for.â
He's right on it now, relentless.Â
Each stroke is a steady assault, steady enough your body starts to learn the pattern, tension building with every collision. The soreness from taking him the first time smooths into a deep, hot throb that wraps around the pleasure, one feeding the other.Â
Your toes curl, your thighs tremble, your stomach ripples around the intrusion like youâre trying to swallow him even deeper.
He slides the hand from your hip back around your front, into the slick heat between your thighs, and finds your clit like heâs been doing it all his life.Â
His fingers are slick with your own mess, rough pads moving in tight, ruthless circles over that swollen bud. It sends lightning directly up your spine, straight to the base of your skull.Â
You choke on a sound that isnât quite a word and jerk against his hand; his arm around your throat holds you in place.
âGoddamn, youâre twitchy,â he groans, grinding his hips down so the bone of him presses your ass, so his cock bruises into that soft spot inside while his fingers roll your clit. âYou gonna fall apart on me again? You gonna let me feel you squeeze all over my cock proper this time?â
Your answer is a breathless, broken, âPlease,â your voice ragged, half sob, half prayer.Â
The table shudders under the force of his thrusts now, the legs complaining in small creaks that match the rhythm of his hips. The lamp flame jumps in its glass, throwing wild shadows against the wallâa tangle of your bent body and his frame hunched over you, shoulders rolling as he works inside you like heâs plowing up hard ground.
Spit slicks your lips; you realize at some point your mouth fell open and just forgot how to close, breath dragging in ragged, wet pulls.Â
You couldnât be bothered to care if you tried; everything is narrowed to the hot place his cock is sawing through and the bright, brutal pulses from his fingers on your clit.
He can feel you climbing, feel your body drawing in tight around him, feel your channel starting to flutter. He growls, low and guttural, the sound pressed against the back of your neck. âThatâs it. Thatâs it, squeeze me.â
His hand at your throat tightens a hair more, narrowing the world to his breathing and yours, the rush of blood in your ears, the drag of wood under your palms.Â
The smallest bit of pressure makes every sensation hit harder; your body goes light and heavy at the same time, limbs tingling, cock-deep pull inside you the only thing that feels solid.
He pistons into you now with a steadier, punishing rhythm, cock dragging from the fat base at your entrance all the way to that deep end that makes your belly flip, then back again.Â
Your ass jiggles from each impact, flesh rippling under his grip. His fingers at your clit donât falter.
You can hear yourself now, high and ruined, begging without even knowing what for. âDonât stopâdonâtâRemmick, donâtâohâoh Godââ
âMhm, use my name,â he hisses, hips crashing into yours, the wet slap echoing off the close walls. âYou say it when you canât hold yourself together no more.â
He leans forward, the sweat on his skin slick against the thin cotton of your nightgown bunched at your waist.Â
His mouth finds the side of your neck, teeth scraping over the delicate skin there, then biting down just hard enough to make you gasp. He sucks, draws blood closer to the surface in a hot sting that only makes your cunt flutter harder around him.
Between the choke of his hand, the sharp pinch of his teeth, the relentless grind of his cock, and the ruthless attention on your clit, you donât stand a chance.
The orgasm slams into you hard enough your knees buckle, your body trying to curl in on itself while he holds you stretched over the table.Â
Everything constricts at onceâyour throat around his hand, your belly around the deep ache, your cunt around his cock. You clamp down on him with startling force, walls seizing, milking, clutching like youâre trying to suck him straight out of his skin.
You cry out. Thereâs no pretty word for it. Sound rips out of you high and raw, your voice cracking on his name.Â
Your vision goes fuzzy with white at the edges, the kitchen shrinking to the rough wood under your hands and the thick, unyielding length splitting you and the brutal roll of pleasure ripping through you in waves.
âFuckâfuck,â he grunts at your ear, the feeling of you spasming around him cutting through every ounce of control he has left. âThatâs it, thatâs it, girl, grip meâJesusââ
He doesnât stop moving, not really; he grinds through it, forcing his cock to keep sliding, short, deep thrusts, using the vice of your orgasm to wring everything he can from you.Â
Youâre shaking all over, thighs trembling so hard your feet skid a little on the floor, toes digging uselessly for purchase.Â
Another rush of slick gushes around him, soaking his cock, dripping down over his balls, sliding warm along the inside of your thighs.
Your body keeps clenching in pulses, the pleasure cresting and breaking over and over until it tips toward something sharp, too much. You whimper, the sound small and shredded. His hand leaves your clit finally, stroking shaking skin instead, but his hips donât stop.
The rhythm goes ragged, less measured, more frantic. His thrusts turn into short, hard ruts, like his bodyâs the one begging now. His fingers flex around your throat, then loosen just a little, thumb stroking your jaw instead as his breathing unravels.
âGonna fill you up,â he groans, voice pitched low and rough. âYou want that? You want me shootinâ deep in you, huh? Want to feel me leakinâ out you all the way back up to that house?â
The words, filthy as they are, punch right through your oversensitivity and light up something molten in your gut.Â
Your sore, flooded cunt tightens around him involuntarily at the thought of carrying him inside you, his spend rolling down your thighs later when you climb into your own bed.Â
You canât shape the answer into full words; what comes out is some strangled mess that sounds like y-yes and a choke.
âYeah, you do,â he snarls like he heard it. âYou greedy little thing, cominâ down here pretendinâ you just wanna talk when your cuntâs hungry as hell.â
He drives in hard, once, twice, three more times, each thrust bottoming him out, pelvis grinding against the round of your ass.Â
The slap of his hips is loud now, sloppy, wetter, your combined mess making the impact slick.
Then his whole body locks.
His stomach clenches tight against your back, jaw clamped against the side of your neck. A sound tears out of him, not quite human, something between a growl and a groan. His cock jerks inside you, swelling even thicker for a heart-stopping second, and then you feel itâhot, heavy spurts of him spilling deep, pounding against your cervix, flooding that space thatâs been empty your entire life with a hot, liquid fullness.
He curses low and hoarse on each pulse, hips rocking in tiny, helpless movements as he empties himself, his own climax dragged out by the way your slick, oversensitive walls keep squeezing and fluttering around him. Every time your cunt milks him, another rope of cum kicks out of him, painting you inside.
âGodâdamnââ he grits, shuddering, one hand sliding from your throat to slap down next to your own on the table, fingers splayed wide, knuckles white on the wood. âYou feel that? Feel me givinâ it to you?â
You do. You feel all of it. Every pulse, every twitch, every deep throb of him lodged inside, filling you, staking a claim. Your whole body feels stuffed, weighty, like heâs poured something molten into your bones.
The shakes take him then. You feel them where his chest is plastered to your back, quivers running through him in waves as his orgasm tapers off.Â
His cock softens a little inside you but doesnât slip free; your swollen entrance and the spent thickness of him keep you plugged together. Each small movement sends a slow, slick ache radiating outward.
For a long moment neither of you says anything.
He slumps more of his weight onto you without meaning to, and you sag under it, cheek pressed to the tabletop, breaths coming in harsh, uneven pulls.Â
Sweat has glued your nightgown to your ribs where itâs still covering your upper body; where itâs bunched around your waist, the fabric clings damp to your skin with a mixture of your own wetness and his.
Eventually, he finds his voice, though itâs wrecked, scraped raw at the edges. âJesus,â he mutters, words ghosting hot over the shell of your ear.Â
For the first time since he pushed into you, he eases his hips back.
You gasp, a little shocked moan slipping out as his softening cock drags along your raw walls.Â
When his head slips past your entrance, your muscles clench on instinct, reluctant to let him go, but gravity wins. He slides free, leaving you empty in a way that feels sharp, unfinished, even with his cum already starting to seep down, warm, from inside you.
Something thick and wet trickles out immediately, a slow, viscous roll that slides over your swollen folds and down the curve of your inner thigh. You feel it clearly, a hot trail in the cooler air of the kitchen. The knowledge of what it is, whose it is, makes your face burn and your belly tighten all over again.
He sees it too.
âLook at that,â he says softly, voice full of rough, satisfied awe.Â
His hand leaves yours and slides down, palm cupping the underside of your ass, thumb catching one of those white streaks, spreading it lazily over your sensitive skin. You flinch, a little gasp escaping before you can stop it.
âToo much?â he asks.
âA little,â you admit, breath still stuttering.Â
He makes a pleased sound at that, thumb dragging one last lazy stripe through the mess before he rubs his hand off on his own thigh.Â
He straightens slowly, the absence of his weight making you sway for a second. His hands, empty now, come to your waist, smoothing down the bunched nightgown. He tugs it back into place over your hips, hiding what heâs done as best cloth can hide it.
Then he crouches a little, fingers catching the waistband of your drawers. Theyâre still tangled around your knees, sticky with your slick.Â
He coaxes them up, guiding the cotton over your tender flesh, covering your cunt, trapping his spend where it is.Â
The pull of the fabric against your oversensitive skin makes you hiss and bite your lip, but it also feels lewd and intimate in a different wayâhis cum pressed up against you, soaked into the cloth that sits right over your entrance.
He knows exactly what heâs doing, sealing you up like that. It shows in the way his thumb lingers a second too long at the gusset, pressing lightly, as if to make sure the material is snug, as if to feel one more time that heâs right there even with clothes between you.
âGonna be walkinâ home with your panties stickinâ to you and a piece of me tryinâ to leak right back out,â he murmurs, voice a dark purr. âYouâll be thinkinâ of me every step.â
You make a weak noise, somewhere between a protest and something softer. Your legs feel unsteady when he finally helps you pull them fully into place, when he urges you upright with hands at your waist.Â
When you stand, itâs like your bones have gone wrongâheavy at the hips, light at the knees, a deep, interior throb that makes you aware of your own body in a way youâve never been.
He turns you gently, so your hip leans back into the edge of the table instead of your chest, so youâre facing him. His hair is damp and rumpled, a curl fallen low over his forehead, chest and stomach slick with sweat.Â
His gaze sweeps over you, taking in the mussed nightgown, the bite marks blossoming at your throat and shoulder where his teeth worried your skin, the slackness of your mouth, the glassy shine to your eyes.Â
Confidence sits easy on him; he looks like a man whoâs put in a long nightâs work and is proud of the job heâs done.
âYouâre gonna cuss me tomorrow,â he says, voice low and a little smug. âWhen you sit down. When you walk. But you ainât gonna regret it.â
You swallow, throat thick, his words settling warm and heavy between your ribs.
âNo,â you admit, even quieter than before, and thereâs no sense lying now. âI donât⌠regret it.â
His mouth curves. âGood.â
You look away, suddenly aware of the time, of the silence of the big house up the hill, of how your mama and daddy are sleeping through something thatâs gone and rearranged their daughter from the inside out.
âI need to go,â you say, voice small but steadying. âBefore my father wakes up for water, or Mama starts callinâ and finds my bed empty.â
His hands fall from your waist, though not without one last, slow sweep along the curve of you, like heâs committing it to memory.Â
âGo on,â he says. âBefore I talk you into layinâ down on that bed in there and not leavinâ till the rooster screams.â
Your body responds to the image with an exhausted throb, a clench around nothing.Â
You push off the table and take a careful step. Your thighs rub, slick, the damp cotton of your drawers pulling against you; you feel a fresh little leak of him inside you, a warm ooze that soaks into the fabric and clings. It makes you stutter a little, the soreness set deep in your core.
Remmick watches the way you move, jaw flexing, something like pride and hunger both tightening his face.Â
He reaches for his trousers, tucking himself away, but he doesnât bother with a shirt yet, doesnât bother pretending heâs anything but what he is: the man who just fucked you on his kitchen table and filled you til youâre walking crooked.
You make it to the door on legs that still shake. Your fingers land on the frame as you pull it open, the cool breath of the night spilling in.Â
Before you step out, you glance back. His eyes are on you, unreadable now, dark and steady in the lamplight.
âYou come down here again,â he says, voice quiet, sure, âdonât pretend youâre just here for salve or scoldinâ. You knock on my door after dark, I know what youâre askinâ for.â
You hold his gaze, the soreness between your thighs, the fullness inside you, the ache in your muscles all speaking louder than any denial you could muster.Â
His eyes follow you out into the dark, low and pleased, and as you cross the yard barefoot, nightgown brushing your knees, his cum warm and sticky between your legs, you know heâs standing there in that doorway shirtless, watching you go with no shame at all, already planning just how heâll take you the next time you come scratching at his door.
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Call Out Sick ⢠Remmick x (gender neutral) reader
warnings!!: none really, maybe some swearing because we are all adults and such, mostly fluff, perhaps some innuendo if you know what I mean
(no song for this one, sorry, this was just thrown together to make sure Yall know Iâm still alive lol)
The alarm went off at the exact time you scheduled it.
With a groan, you tried to roll over in bed to turn it off but to no avail. Remmick was holding you in a vice grip.
âRems, lemme go for a sec. Gotta turn the stupid fucking thing off,â You mumbled, trying to pry his bony fingers off you.
He grumbled a âmm-mmâ and held onto you tighter.
âRemmick.â
He sighed and finally loosened his grip. You leaned over the side of the bed to slap the snooze button. You sat up and stretched out your tired limbs. Mondays always came harder to wake up for.
âMm, darlinââŚâ Remmick whined, putting on the best set of puppy eyes for you. âDonât go, itâll be so lonesome without you.â
âI wish I could, but the bills donât pay themselves. You know itâs only for a few hours and Iâll be back.â
He dramatically flopped forward to wrap his arms around your torso.
âThose hours are torture without you. Please, honey? Just stay. Itâs dangerous out there. And cold, andâŚâ He continued listing bullshit reasons for you to stay in bed with him.
âSorry, Remmick, you know I canât. Iâll make it up to you later, I promise.â
âCruel lilâ thing, you are,â He grumbled into your back.
An idea popped into his head as he laid there. If he couldnât convince you to stay with words, he could try with actions.
He immediately pulled your shirt up and began kissing his way up your back.
âRemmick, come on, Iâm gonna be late.â
âWhat a shame,â He smirked against your skin. He pulled himself up and brought his lips to your neck and began sucking and kissing.
âRemmick, fuck, stop that,â You weakly protested. You couldnât deny that it felt amazing, but you knew better. âWhatâre you trying to do, get me fired?â
His sharp teeth grazed against the tender spot that makes your knees buckle every time without fail. âNaw, âm not trying to get you fired,â He said above a whisper. âTrying to get you to change yer mind.â
You let out a moan when his tongue lapped against the bites he was leaving. Sadly, his plan was working.
As you were about to give in, your cell phone began buzzing. The two of you stopped and saw the caller ID. Shit. Your boss was already resorting to seeking you out.
Before you could reach it, Remmick swooped his arm over you and grabbed the phone, tapping the answer button.
âTheyâre sick, canât come in today, sorry!â He hissed. He turned off your phone and chucked it across the room.
Your eyes were wide with shock as you gawked at him.
âWhat the f-?!â He covered your mouth with his big hand before the words could come out.
âShh, donât worry, yer sick, remember? Now let me give ya yer medicine.â
~~~~
A short little Drabble for today because today was especially hard to get up for work for me lol
To those who requested stuff, I am SO sorry! I swear on god Iâm still working on them, Iâm just very very very slow. They shall be released someday hopefully soon!
Summary: After losing all seven of his Fingers and nearly dying himself, Jimmy has never felt so lost. So stranded. So devoid of purpose. He prays to his father for a sign. Instead, he is met with a vision: You, an uninfected woman, making love to a red-eyed Alpha. One who speaks, touches you with care, and ensures you enjoy it just as much as him.
The sight overwhelms Jimmy. Fills him with fantasies and desires he never thought possible.
He returns to that spot, eager to see your lovemaking again. Eager to be part of it, if only by watching.
Neither you nor your Alpha lover, Remmick, wants to harm him. No. You want to keep him.
"I believe that the infection can be treated."
Three months since Dr. Ian Kelson, who'd long ago become 'Da' to you, had spoken those words, yet they still clanged within your skull like rusted church bells. He may as well have said that fish can fly, or that hemlock was a great seasoning. It would've been just as preposterous.
When the virus struck, you'd spent the first three days of the new world's existence cowering in a broom closet with your parents' lifeblood drying on your clothes. If Ian hadn't found you... you'd have been there still, nothing but bones and dusty clothes. He'd taken you in. Loved and nurtured you. Taught you everything he knew. Been there for you. Yours wasn't just gratitude, but genuine love for the man.
That was why, for the first week or so after he'd made his declaration, you'd tried time and time again to talk him out of it. Told him that it wasn't possible. That even if the rest of the world had found a cure, they'd written off the British Isles as lost, all those living there as not worth saving now that the virus had been cleansed everywhere else. And leaving wasn't possible, either. Not with powerful eyes watching the islands, ready to bomb any vessel they saw to Kingdom Come.
"And even if you did find a cure, somehow," you'd carried on, "whatever meds you have are finite. You'd never be able to cure every single infected here."
Ian had given you a sad smile, his chlorine-blue eyes crinkling with affection. "I know, dear," he'd said, "but if I can cure even a small handful of people, then that'd make all the difference."
You'd groaned. Begged. Insisted that it was a pipe dream. But in the end, when he'd gone hunting for an infected to bring back home, you'd seized your weapons and shadowed him.
As the morning mists curled around the hills, the sun a silver coin just beyond the tree line, the two of you had set a trap. Laid out the boar organs you'd been intending to grill and stew. Made sure the line was nice and taut. Then, you hid in the blackberry bushes, which were just starting to bear fruit.
That last part was your idea. Waiting for a trap to spring could take a while. At least this way, you'd have something to eat. You weren't a fussy eater by any meansâhard to be, when you grew up hunting in the woods and scavenging in long-abandoned supermarketsâbut blackberries were easily your favorite.
You and Ian munched on a few berries, the juice staining your lips until you probably looked a little like infected yourselves, when something came into view. Sniffing. Tilting its head.
You were holding a rock. Ready to throw it at an animal and scare it away from the trap. But as the thing stepped out of the shadows, the stone slipped from your fingers.
It was an infected. Male. Dressed in a filthy white wife-beater and black trousers, the shoes soggy and full of holes. Its pale skin was marred with dried gore, its dark hair hanging in stiff clumps, and its eyes were rubies. Its fingernails had grown so long, they were practically claws. That old movie, Nosferatu, sailed before your mind's eye. Its teeth, too, were those of a predator. Sharp. Jagged.
It wasn't the biggest infected you'd ever seen. Not by a long shot. It was only a little taller than you, its build strong but slender. But somehow, the way it carried itself was unmistakable.
It was an Alpha.
Anxiety gnawed at you with broken fangs. Presently, Alphas were the crème de la crème of the Rage Virus. Stronger, faster, smarter, and more tenacious than other infected. If an Alpha was ever in a herd of infected, you could bet whatever you liked that they'd be the unquestioned leader.
Honestly, you'd have preferred a weak, pathetic specimen. At least, when Ian's optimistic endeavor failed, the creature would be easy to kill. An Alpha in the Bone Temple? In your home? The thought was too horrifying to consider.
Even so... You couldn't deny that this was a good-looking specimen. Handsome, yes. But beyond that... there was something almost pensive in the way it carried itself. Like a musician trying out a tune in their head.
Who had this Alpha been before being bitten? What had it been like? You knew that whoever he'd been was lost now, with only a rabid carcass to prove he'd existed at all. But as you watched the Alpha inch closer, tilting its head like a curious bird, you felt the faintest stirrings of pity for it. Maybe even compassion.
Ian had rubbed off on you even more than you'd thought.
The Alpha neared the organs, each one glistening in the anemic sunlight like a wet jewel. It began to drool at the smell; thick, viscous tendrils hanging from its lips. Its fingers twitched with anticipation.
It took another step.
The wrong step.
With a snap and a whir, the line went taut and the Alpha was reeled into the air. Its ankle was bound with steel wire, already cutting into the pallid flesh, and its body flailed like a fish out of water. It began to scream and howl in outrage, sending several flocks of frightened birds careening into the sky.
Gone was the pensive gentleness. Gone were the contemplations of who'd lived in this body before. Only the virus remained. Only the madness. Only the Alpha.
You looked to Ian one last time. "This is never going to work."
Ian gave your hand a gentle squeeze. "I think it will," he told you. "But even if you're right, dear, even if it's hopeless..." he gave you a beseeching look, "... how will we know if we don't try?"
You looked at him for a long time, seeing the kindness and sweetness that the world hadn't beaten out of himâthough not for lack of trying. The same kindness that'd compelled him to build the Bone Temple, take you in, and knock out the infected rather than kill them.
You emptied your lungs of air. "Let's get this over with."
Ian smiled at you. "That's my girl."
The two of you approached the screaming Alpha. Upon seeing you, its furious howls grew louder and somehow even angrier. It tried to force its body towards either you. Reaching out, ready to tear you limb from limb.
Promptly, you hit its head with the butt of your spear. In one, precise blow, the Alpha was knocked out. Hanging there like a side of veal.
Ian cracked his knuckles. "All right," he murmured, "let's work, pray, and work some more."
You grunted. "And get a big dose of morphine ready. Just in case."
***
Ian injected the Alpha with his homemade cure, hope twinkling in his eyes. You were just happy that he'd agreed to chaining the creature's wrists and ankles while it was still unconscious. You kept your spear ready, just in case, the blade sharp and keep and ready for service.
Sitting far enough away to be safe, yet close enough to protect your adopted father, you watched. Waited. Simultaneously dreaded and looked forward to the Alpha waking up and proving you right.
It wasn't that you didn't want it to work. Of course you did. You'd have been over the moon if Ian could cure even one person of the virus. But this world loved to kill hope. Some days, it seemed too much to hope for a stag plump enough to feed you both for a fortnight. Hoping for something as monumental as a cure felt like asking for disillusionment.
The Alpha's eyes snapped open, its pupils blood-red. But instead of lunging for either of you, or fighting against its restraints like you expected, it simply growled. A warning. Nothing more, nothing less. It assessed its environment with something within shouting distance of intelligence, its body stiff with tension.
Ian held his hands up for the creature to see. "Easy," he spoke softly, as though to a spooked animal. "My name is Ian. And this," he nodded in your direction, "is (y/n). My adopted daughter. We don't want to hurt you. We only want to help."
You hummed. A noncommittal reply. It was the best you could do.
The Alpha hissed, but still made no move to attack.
For a long, tense moment, none of you moved.
Then, slowly, the Alpha shifted. Raised its hands.
For a second, you thought it wanted to attack. You tightened your grip on your spear.
Then, you realized what it was doingâand your jaw dropped.
The creature had raised its clawed hands. Imitating Ian.
Ian laughed. You could only stare.
***
At first, the creature remained chained to the bed in the supply chamber. You and Ian took turns feeding it, injecting it with the cure, cleaning it, and simply sitting with it. Keeping it company. It never bit either of you. Never showed any aggression. If anything, it became more docile by the day.
But by the end of the fifth day, it was anxiously tugging at its restraints, looking at the grate leading to the outside.
You could almost see its thoughts. It wanted to run. To hunt. To breathe fresh air, as it had for who knows how long before it wandered into your trap.
Ian didn't notice the creature's restlessness. He was too busy taking notes and ensuring the cure's ingredients were stocked.
But you noticed. And, despite a part of your brain screaming at you to not be stupid, to keep the danger to a minimum, you found yourself undoing the straps.
The Alpha massaged its wrists, staring at you without an ounce of hostility. You half-expected it to thank you. If it had, you would've fainted.
Slowly, almost timidly, it got to its feet. Approached you slowly. Your spear was close enough to grab, but you made no move to seize it. You simply let the Alpha get close to you, meeting its gaze. Sensing not anger or madness from it, but simple curiosity.
It was clean now, donned in some of Ian's old clothes. You'd even used some of your shampoo on its hair, its dark waves now glossy in the poor lighting.
That, combined with the almost gentle way it was looking at you, made the Alpha look human.
The creature reached for you. Slowly. Hesitantly. Its long-clawed hand traced your cheek as though it were made of delicate lace. The edge of your mouth quirked up, and the Alpha mirrored you. Was it just mimicry? Or did it feel as you did?
You swallowed. Letting yourself hope, if only for a moment. "What's your name?"
The Alpha's lips moved, but no sound came out.
"My name is (y/n)," you told it in a gentle voice. "Can you say that?"
The Alpha kept looking at you like you were the moon peeking out of a storm cloud. It touched your cheek again. You found yourself leaning into it. "Would you like to go outside?" You pointed to the exit.
The Alpha's gaze lit up, no better than a child being offered candy. You smiled. Widely, genuinely, for the first time. You nodded, moving slowly for the exit. "Come."
It did.
You watched the Alpha for the rest of the day, smiling to yourself. You watched it bask in the sunlight as though it hadn't had the chance in years. Watched it splash around in the river. Watched it sniff a flower, try to eat it, and then spit it out in angered revulsion, floored that something that smells so sweet could taste so vile. The display made you laugh. The Alpha turned towards your laughter... and smiled at you. The sight did strange things to your heartbeat.
***
From that night onward, it didn't sleep with any restraints. And, one day at a time, you and Ian began to interact with it more. You assigned it with simple tasks, like fetching firewood or guarding the Bone Temple.
But in between chores, you began to teach the Alpha what it meant to live as a human. Ian played music, fully encouraging the two of you to dance along with it. You taught the Alpha how to play checkers and poker, often letting it win. With the patience of a saint, Ian reintroduced the Alpha to words, holding up the items so that it could make the connection. You talked to the Alpha about this and that, letting it grow used to conversation.
One day, it left. You held back tears. Convinced that it'd abandoned you both.
It came back at nightfall with a stag, carrying it without breaking a sweat. Reverently, the Alpha laid the dead beast at your feet. Looking at you from beneath its eyelashes. Is this good? that gaze screamed. Did I do good for you?
Two things happened that night: The three of you ate well, and you started calling the Alpha 'him'. Both in your mind and with your voice.
***
One day, three months after you and Ian first dragged the Alpha's body to the Bone Temple, you heard his voice for the first time.
You were reading to the Alphaâa daily ritual for you, today's selection was Paradise Lostâwhen he said something.
A single word.
Your name.
You froze, the old tome nearly falling from your hands.
"Could..." you swallowed hard, "... could you... repeat that, please?"
From his place at your feet, the Alpha smiled at you. He did that a lot. "(Y/n)." He said the word with all the gravitas of a priest quoting Scripture.
You chortled. Just a little at first, then more. Loudly. Happily. Almost overwhelmed by the joy flooding your mind and heart. Putting the book down, you nodded as you abandoned your chair. Moved to kneel on the ground beside him, your hands finding his shoulders. "Yes!" you exclaimed. "Yes, that's right!" Your hand found his cheek, and he leaned into it with a sigh. "You did it! You..." You laughed again, though it was tinged with sadness this time. "But I still don't know your name."
The Alpha looked back at you, saw your distress, and took a few rapid blinks. Straightened. Visibly racked his brains to remember.
"It's okay," you said quickly, wanting to shield him from that potential disappointment. "It's all right, you don't have toâ"
"R... Remmick."
Your jaw dropped. For a moment, it was stuck like that. Then, carefully, you echoed him. "Remmick?"
The Alpha brightened. Nodded eagerly.
You giggled even as a couple of hot tears ran down your face. "Okay. Remmick." You exhaled, feeling like you'd just been given a priceless gift. "Nice to meet you, Remmick."
After a moment's hesitation, Remmick reached up and covered your hands. Keeping them on his shoulders.
***
Ian was ecstatic. Even more so when, in the following weeks, more and more words bloomed on Remmick's lips like flowers. Warm. Cold. Hungry. Okay. Then, as summer made way for autumn, he began to speak in short but clear sentences. Full moon tonight. Infected nearby. Need more water. I go hunt. And, your personal favorite: One more story?
You briefly freaked out when Ian disclosed, out of Remmick's earshot, that he was going to begin weaning the Alpha off the cure. "He's been taking it for a season now," he explained. "I think that it's well and truly in his system. Giving him more might just be a waste of limited resources."
"Yes," you hissed, your eyes darting anxiously back to Remmick, "or it might keep him human! Son of a bitch, Da, what if he regresses? What if he attacks us? I don'tâ!" You cut yourself off, but Ian heard the rest anyway. I don't want to lose him.
Ian covered your hand with his. "Let's just see what happens, hmm?"
You worried your bottom lip. And that night, when the time for Remmick's daily dose came and went, you sweated bullets. Watched him closely. Waited for any relapse. Any regression. You were so anxious, you couldn't even eat dinner.
That night, Remmick tapped on the curtain that separated your portion of the shelter from Ian's. And when you let him in, he approached you. His eyes were still red, but clear. His body language, gentle. That alone helped you relax, if only a little.
"Are you okay?" you asked, sitting up in your cot. "Are you still hungry, or...?"
Remmick shook his head. Suddenly looking as timid as a child, he nudged the cot's corner with his foot. "Can I...?" He gave his lips a nervous lick. "With you?"
Your shock must've shown on your face, for Remmick added. "Wanna... be near... you." The longest sentence he'd said so far, each word raw and bloody. His face, ashen with longing and vulnerability.
That was when you knew, beyond any doubt, that Remmick wouldn't hurt you.
You didn't know if the cure's effects would wear off. But whatever tomorrow brought, you knew that for tonight, all he wanted was closeness.
Your heart somersaulting in your rib-cage, you slowly nodded. Remmick smiled. Sweetly, almost childlike. You threw back the blankets and scooted back in the cot, making as much room for him as you could. He crawled in, eyes like embers, and wasted no time taking you in his arms.
You gasped at the sudden contact before slowly relaxing, pulling the afghans to cover you both. Then, once you were both tucked in, you rested your head against his chest. Listened to the steady drumbeat of his strong heart.
His hand found your hair. Stroking it gently.
You two lay there for what simultaneously felt like seconds and hours. Time softened all around you, the world narrowing to this small chamber, the bed, the candle burning on your nightstand, and your intertwining bodies.
"Goodnight, Remmick," you whispered, your eyelids growing heavy. "I wish you good dreams."
"Goodnight, (y/n)," he murmured in reply. Then, you felt him shift against you.
Felt his lips press against the crown of your head.
You never slept better than you did that night.
***
As autumn froze into winter, and Remmick's doses withered away to nothing, he continued to mesmerize you.
On one hand, he never became fully human. His eyes stayed red. His freakish strength remained. And when he was bitten by a couple of other infectedâwho didn't live long enough to regret their poor decisionâthe bite marks healed, and that was the end of that.
On the other, Remmick's mind continued to emerge from its virus-induced fog. His sentences grew longer still, his memory coming back in fragments. He began to read to you, just as you'd done for him, his hand never far from yours. He and Ian began to discuss matters over dinner, while you mostly sat back and watched with a mixture of admiration and affection. They discussed politics in the Before times. History. Philosophy. Even cooking shows and music.
Remmick revealed that he'd once played the banjo. That he'd loved it more than air.
Not long after, while scavenging in one of the many desolate towns, you found a relatively intact music store. It didn't take you long to find what you were looking for.
Remmick stared at the banjo for a long time, his eyes and mouth forming three perfect O's. Hesitantly, almost fearfully, he strummed the strings. Notes sweetened the air like perfume.
"Do you like it?" you asked, caught between giddiness and anxiety.
Remmick set the banjo against one of the many pillars of femurs and humerus bones. Then, he turned around, cupped your face, and pulled you into a kiss.
It was gentle, almost chaste. No tongue. No teeth knocking together. You two barely even tilted your heads.
You didn't rush, either. Neither of you did. Just slowly fell into the sensation together, like stones sliding into warm water.
Your eyes slid shut. His clawed hands, capable of rending flesh like tissue paper, cradled your cheeks with the utmost tenderness. After a moment, you wrapped your arms around his neck.
When you parted, if only a little, you felt as though someone had stuffed your head with wool fluff. Remmick's cheeks were dusted pink, his ears the color of Pepto Bismol, and his pupils were the size of bullet holes. You'd never seen anyone smile so widely, and it was beautifulâsharp teeth and all.
"Wow." The word, more sighed than said, warmed your own, crimsoned cheeks.
You giggled. "I know."
Remmick suddenly seemed to realize something. "I'm sorry I didn't ask first. I was just so happy, and..." he gave a helpless shrug.
You arched a brow. "Do I look upset to you?"
"... No?" Remmick ventured.
You laughed. "How about you kiss me again? Just to be sure you didn't cross any lines?"
Remmick chortled, his unease melting away like spring snow, and he leaned in for another kiss. This time, he coiled his arms around your waist and picked you up as though you were weightless. You cackled against his lips, tightening your grip around his neck, before kissing him back with fervor.
It was one of the happiest moments of your life, bar none. And somehow, you knew that it wouldn't be the last. Not for you, and not for Remmick.
***
Neither of you two said it out loud, but ever since the kiss, you became a couple.
You held hands all the time. You went hunting and foraging together. You shared a bed, often cuddling before sleep claimed you both. You kissed and touched each other over your clothes. You read together, often for hours, sitting shoulder to shoulder with mugs of home-brewed tea and snacks within arm's reach. You talked about everything and nothing. You told each other things you'd never told anyone else. You gave each other little gifts, from necklaces made from small animal bones to flowers to unexpected treasures you found in the wreckage. When either of you was sick or hurt, the other was right there, ready to help in any way possible.
Nobody told you how to act in the relationship. Not even Ian. He smiled at you two, showed his approval and joy in everything he did, but he never once tried to dictate your behavior. And even the few romance books you found and read didn't leave much of an impact.
It felt better this way. More genuine. More yours. You did things because you both wanted to, not because you were obeying some pre-approved script.
The more time passed, the more you wondered how you'd gone so long without ever feeling this way. Being in love was like living in a country that was different, brighter, softer than your own. Where colors were more vibrant, food had more flavor, and problems weren't as earth-shattering.
You didn't even realize that was what you felt. Not right away.
But one night, as the first flowers began to poke through the snow, you and Remmick sneaked into the woods in pursuit of some time alone. You found a small clearing, along the whispering river, and settled on a blanket you'd brought.
It was a beautiful night, clear and starry, with the bright moon painting the landscape silver. That, coupled with Remmick's gentle touches and reverent kisses, fished the words right out of your throat. They stalled in the air, as thick and warm as the breath that'd carried them.
"I love you."
Remmick froze. Slowly drew back to stare at you with eyes the size of dumplings.
Eyes that were quickly watering.
Your heart nearly broke at the sight. "Oh, honey, no," you began to wipe the tears cascading down his pale cheeks. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I shouldn't haveâ"
"I love you, too," Remmick rasped.
You blinked at him, your fingers still wiping his face. "You...?"
Remmick began to nod, clutching at your hands to keep them near his visage. "I do, I really do," he croaked, his eyes locked with yours, desperate to make you understand, "I do, (y/n). I love you. I love you. I..." With a small whimper, he closed the distance between you. Claimed your lips in a deep, slow kiss salted by his tears. And, you soon realized, yours too.
You kissed long. Hard. As though trying to stamp yourselves into each other's DNA. And when you finally parted, you were both panting.
Remmick's eyes, those iridescent rubies you'd grown to adore so much, gazed into yours. His eyelashes were still wet, a few errant tears still gleaming on his cheeks like liquid silver.
In a voice as soft as spidersilk, he whispered, "Kelson may've given me the cure... but you made me human again."
Your heart fit to bursting, you cupped his cheeks and kissed him again. Hoping to pour everything you felt into his mouth and down his throat. Hoping to nourish him with it.
Remmick kissed you back with equal passion, his clawed hands trembling as they held you close. Gently, posed more as a question than a command, he pushed you down to lay on your back.
You let yourself lie on the blanket, tugging Remmick down with you. He covered his body with yours, planting a hand beside your head so as to keep the majority of his weight off you. The two of you continued to kiss, to have a conversation in a language only you knew, until the pesky need for air got in the way.
"Please," you whispered against his kiss-bruised lips, "I want us to make love." Nervously, you added, "I don't think you can infect me. Not when we've been kissing for as long as we have. I..." you traced his face with feather-light fingertips, "... I just want to be with you."
Remmick's face crumpled. "I want the same, love." He leaned in. Not to kiss you, but to nuzzle you like an affectionate housecat. "Lemme make ya feel good?"
You chuckled despite the love and joy threatening to drown you. "How can I turn down an offer like that?"
Remmick grinned, eyes lighting up like distant wildfires. Stealing one last quick kiss, he began to crawl down your body, peppering you with butterfly kisses as he descended. Even through your clothes, you felt his lips and longed for more.
Remmick made it to your trousers. Stopped and looked up at you. You nodded, breathless and eager. Smiling, he undid your buttons and pulled the cloth down your legs. You were happy to shimmy out of them, leaving your lower half completely bare, even as your skin was immediately overtaken by goose-bumps.
Remmick hiked your legs over his shoulders, giving him full access to your entrance. Then, meeting your gaze across the landscape of your body, he grinned. "Ready?"
You grinned right back at him. "Are you?"
Remmick laughed. "Your tongue's quick..." he winked, "but mine's quicker."
Before you could reply, he dove in like a scuba diver from the Before.
The first sweep of his tongue made your knees buckle against his shoulders. By the time you'd caught your breath, he'd already slipped his tongue back inside like it'd always been meant to fit there. His slow, long drags made your whole body lock up. Remmick licked you like he meant it. Like heâd earned it. Like he'd been dreaming of tasting you for weeks, if not months, and had finally gotten his wish.
Remmick worked his jaw, his tongue gliding along your folds, until you were nothing but a trembling, soaking mess.
All thought abandoned you. You were nothing but pure, primal need, desperate for more, more, more. You bucked against Remmick's mouth, combing both hands in his hair to keep him right where he was, and moaned without shame.
Let Ian hear you. Raiders. Infected. You didn't care. You were in Heaven, and Heaven was a long way away from Earth.
Remmick parted just long enough to say, "That's it, baby. Ride my face. Take what you want. I wanna make you feel so good. Better than you've ever felt. Gods," he began to lower himself again, "I love you so much..."
"Y-you, too!" you cried out. "R-Remmick, you feel so good, you're doing so good... God, I love you..."
Remmick groaned. You felt him shifting. Heard his belt buckle clinking.
Then, you felt his arm slide down his own body. Felt ripples of steady movement connecting his body to yours, all the while he kept working you like he'd been born to do it.
You realized it then, through the thickening fog of pleasure: Remmick was touching himself while pleasing you.
The thought was so erotic, it made you cry out. Remmick moaned in reply, muffled by your folds.
The rhythm of his mouth grew sloppier then. Louder. His hand quickened along his length, the slick glide adding to the orchestra of your rapture.
Your toes curled tight. Your clit throbbed against Remmick's greedy lips. You were close, so, so close, legs trembling, stomach tight, ready to reach the zenith of your pleasure.
And just when you were about to come hard enough to see starsâ
Remmick pulled away. Suddenly, like a deer hearing a twig snap.
Even as you mourned the loss, you sat up. "Are you okay?"
Remmick didn't answer right away. He scanned the woods just beyond the river. His face looked like it'd been carved from soap.
In that moment, he wasn't your lover. He was an Alpha. A predator.
Gently, you touched his claw.
Remmick blinked. Looked back at you with softening red eyes. "Sorry, darlin'," he mumbled.
"No, it's okay," you promised, "but what happened? Infected?"
Remmick shook his head. "Just thought I heard something, is all." He gave the tree-line one last survey before reverting his gaze to you. "I left my girl unsatisfied." He sounded genuinely ashamed. Closing the distance between you, he rested his forehead against yours. "Forgive me?"
You caressed his cheek, damp with your slick. "There's nothing to forgive."
Remmick exhaled with relief. "Still..." he gave you a cheeky smile, "... we ain't done yet, are we?"
In response, you climbed on his lap, looping your arms around his neck. Instinctively, he cupped your ass. Keeping you right where you both wanted to be. You gave his cock a few strokes, pleased by the precum easing your movements and Remmick's moan.
"May I?" you asked.
Remmick swallowed. Hard. "I think I'll die if you don't." He only sounded like he was half-joking. No, more like one-third.
You tutted. "Well, I can't have that." Guiding the engorged, reddish-purple head to your entrance, you gave him a playful smirk. "You still have to finish reading Anna Karenina to me."
Remmick's laugh turned into a moan as he slipped inside you. He coiled his arms around you, burying his face into your neck and breathing you in with ragged desperation.
"You're so... so warm..." he groaned against your skin. "So soft... Wanna live in you..."
You carded a hand in his hair. Turning your head to kiss whatever you could reach. His temple. His cheek. His earlobe. "You feel good, too," you told him. "So hard, so perfect for me."
You two started moving then, your bodies falling into a rhythm that should've belonged to people who'd been lovers for years and not a couple exploring each other for the first time. Remmick thrust up. You ground down. The two of you kissed as though you were trying to suck the very oxygen out of your lungs. All the while, the pressure climbed. The heat off your bodies made it feel more like summer than winter.
"Remmick," you moaned, "my RemmickâI love youâGodâhow'd I get so lucky?"
Remmick moaned your name as though it were salvation and damnation both. "That's right, I'm yoursâand you're mineâfuckâwe both got luckyânever lettin' you go, not unless you tell me to..."
You hid your face in his neck. Not to hide. Just to be closer. And Remmick reciprocated, burying his face in your hair. You both held each other so tightly, you wouldn't have been surprised to find you'd branded each other with your fingerprints. Nor would you have minded.
Soon, you were back where you'd been before Remmick had stopped. Pleasure climbed up your spine like ivy. Found your brain. Prepared to crack open like an egg inside it.
Desperate for more, for that wonderful peak, you slid your hand down your belly.
But Remmick gently batted it away. "I gotcha," he promised with a toothy grin.
Then, his fingers found your clit. Tight, slick circles that matched his thrusts.
You cried out, jolting as though you'd just received an electric shock. You kissed him, hard, and then trailed your lips along his jaw. His neck. His shoulder.
That was when you saw him. Across the river. Hiding behind a tree. Trying to be inconspicuous and doing a rather poor job of it.
Hard to be invisible when you have blond hair painted silver by moonlight. When you're wearing a velvet tracksuit. When you're fumbling with the bulge in your trousers like you hardly know what to do with it.
That was when you understood, even with pleasure addling your brain. Remmick had heard something, and you were looking at itâhimânow.
He was a few years older than you, around Remmick's age. Handsome like Remmick, same body type, but with less definition than Remmick. Softer, in every sense of the phrase... except for a certain part of his anatomy, barely hidden by his pants.
You should've been angry. Indignant. You should've sicced Remmick on the interloper.
Instead, you felt even more aroused than before. Flattered that your moment with Remmick was feeding a stranger's pleasure. Excited to see the naked desire on this man's face, to see him barely stop himself from touching his throbbing cock.
Beyond the erotic elements, you were strangely moved by the emotion on the stranger's face. The longing. The loneliness. The hunger for more than just flesh. It was all there, clear as day, and it broke your heart a little.
You had Remmick, and he had you. But who did this blond guy have?
Still moaning, still writhing against Remmick, you nodded at the stranger. Silently gave him permission. His eyes widened, his already flushed cheeks going beet-red. But the moment his shock faded and he realized you'd given him your blessing, he untied the strings of his trousers and pulled himself out. Began to stroke himself furiously, biting his bottom lip to keep quiet.
You saw the relief on his face. The simple joy of partaking, if only from a distance.
"That's it," you murmured to both men, "that's it, you're doing so well, so perfect for me, baby..."
Remmick whimpered, rutting into you harder, as his hands trembled against your flesh. "Oh, fuck!" he cried out. "IâIâm gonnaâ"
You felt Remmick's cock pulse inside you. Saw the stranger's face contort as his own orgasm took him. Saw the tendrils of cum spurt out of him, painting the half-melted snow at his feet.
That was all it took for your climax to finally strike you like lightning. You clung to Remmick with every part of you, crying out his name.
Remmick followed seconds later, shuddering against you as his own peak tore through him.
The two of you stayed like that for several long, blissful minutes. Holding each other close. Trading kisses that were slow, almost lazy, like sips of fine wine. Letting your heartbeats slow down together.
It was there, with your forehead against Remmick's, that you finally told him. "Someone was watching us."
Remmick drew back a bit. "Huh?"
You nodded. Jerked your chin towards the tree the stranger had been hiding behind. Unsurprisingly, the man himself was nowhere to be seen. "He enjoyed it quite a bit, too."
Remmick growled lowly, his claws twitching along your flesh. "He did, did he?" He flashed his teeth, no doubt already imagining what the man's flesh would feel like between them. "I knew I sensed somebody about."
"I don't think he meant any harm," you told Remmick, brushing some sweat-dampened hair out of those lovely scarlet eyes. "He looked... well, horny, yes. But lonely, too."
Remmick looked at you for a moment, a thoughtful expression settling over his face. All the while, he touched you. Caressed your back. Fiddled with your hair. You let him watch. Let him think.
At last, he spoke. "Well... let's see what happens next time, hmm?"
You arched a brow, smiling faintly. "What?" you asked. "You'd let him join us?"
"Hey," he replied, "stranger things have happened, love." He cupped your cheek, and as you leaned into his touch, he added, "Like an Alpha bein' cured. And finding love with a human."
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1. Remmick (Sinners)
2. Oliver Mellors (Lady Chatterley's Lover)
3. Lion Kaminski (Jungleland)
4. Jimmy Crystal (28 Years Later)
5. Unnamed (Noel Gallagher MV)
6. Blake-Fielder Civil (Back to Black)
7. Brett (Eden Lake)
8. Brick (Cat on a Hot Tin Roof)
9. Louis Zamperini (Unbroken)
10. Boxing Guy (9 Kisses)
11. Cameron Todd Willingham (Trial by Fire)
12. Jack Solomon (Seberg)
13. Willem Brok (Tulip Fever)
14. Eric Love (Starred Up)
15. Scarecrow (Robot & Scarecrow)
16. Kyle Budwell (Money Monster)
17. Peter Collins (Ferrari)
18. Jan Kubis (The Man with the Iron Heart)
19. Gary Hook ('71)
20. Jack (Home)
21. Bobby Charlton (United)
22. Dylan (Weekender)
23. Adam (The Liability)
24. Calisto (300: Rise of an Empire)
25. Charlie Peaceful (Private Peaceful)
26. Kurtis (Tower Block)
27. Private Charlie Miller (Shelter)
28. Chris (Black Dog)
29. Dale Baxter (Waterloo Road)
30. Shepherd Lad (Wuthering Heights)
31. Pukey Nicholls (This Is England)
32. Connor Yates (Doctors)
33. Jude Williams (Little Fish)
34. Ross Trescot (The Bill)
35. Man 10 (The Somnambulists)
36. Thug (The Hardest Part)
37. Jack Norton (Wire in the Blood)
38. Dylan Spokes (The Nap)
39. Marky (Harry Brown)
40. Davey Hunt (Holby City)
Summary: Jimmy Crystal awakens from a wretched nightmare. One where he'd grown up alone, become a sadistic cult leader, and killed people because the voice in his head told him to. He wakes up still feeling the nails in his wrists. Thankfully, you are there to comfort him.
Content Warning: Contains smut (p in v sex) and mentions of skinning, torture, disembowelments.
Nightmares were a staple in the world you lived in. The infectedâor demons, as Jimmy had always called themâhad a way of forcing their way into one's mind. And if their blood-red eyes and bone-chilling shrieks didn't haunt your dreams, some of your fellow survivors did. Plenty of newcomers and transplants in your community had stories about raiders, cannibals, cults, and more. Stories you personally didn't want your children to hear.
But when Jimmy woke up with a jolt, snapping you out of your slumber, you instantly knew something was wrong.
He was panting, nearly wheezing. Frantically touching his wrists as though searching for wounds. And crying like a child. Big, wet gulps that instantly yanked at your heartstrings.
"Jimmy? Sweetheart?" you placed a hand on his shoulder. He flinched, his cries halting. For a moment, his watering eyes seemed to merely look through you. Then, whatever he'd been dreaming of relented enough for him to recognize you. "Oh, (y/n), honey..." His voice was nothing like the smooth, rich baritone that preached your people for hours, read fairy tales to your children, and sang softly to you. It was brittle. Weak.
You pushed an errant lock out of his face, getting the best view you could in your dim bedroom. "Are you okay?" Your gaze flickered to his wrists, but found only smooth, pale skin.
Jimmy opened his mouth, but whatever answer he would've given you was lost to fresh sorrow.
"Oh, baby..." He let you pull him into your arms, hiding his face in your neck like it was the only safe place in the world. Already, you could feel hot tears soaking into your skin. Could hear the cries he was barely muffling. You held him close, cupping the base of his skull and rubbing his back.
All the while, you tried to keep your own tears in check. This was the man who'd been your husband for nearly five years now. Who'd found you in the wilderness and brought you here, to the best home you'd ever had. Who'd given you two beautiful children. You'd seen him command his Fingers, take down infected, and execute justice with nary a twitch in his jaw. And now, he was crying with a fear that seemed almost too profound, too intense, to expel.
A part of you was tempted to call his father, Ian, and get him to make Jimmy something. A concoction to help him sleep, or at least calm him down. Why not? Ian had already created an elixir that kept the voice in Jimmy's head quiet. Comparatively, a sleeping mixture would've been child's play.
"It's okay," you kept saying, using the same tone you employed with the kids when they were littler, "you're all right. I'm here. I'm right here. Shh, shh..."
Eventually, Jimmy's sobs died down to the occasional sniffle. Shuddering against you as though gripped by a fever, he kissed and nuzzled your saturated neck. "M'sorry, dovey," he managed to say through his tears. "I just... I..."
"It's all right," you promised him, tucking some hair behind his ear. "Just breathe, okay?"
Jimmy nodded, taking one shuddering breath after another. You breathed with him, using the edge of a blanket to wipe his face as best you could.
"I..." Jimmy trailed off, cleared his throat, and tried again. "I dreamed I..."
"You don't have to talk about it now," you cut him off gently, fearing he might get upset again. "It can wait until tomorrow."
"No, I... I can do it." Jimmy shifted so that he wasn't distributing so much of his body weight on you. You moved along with him, making sure that he stayed in your arms. Your legs tangled together, your hearts beating in gentle synchrony.
Finally, Jimmy spoke. "I dreamed I..." he shuddered, "... was a monster."
You kissed his forehead. "I've dreamed of being an infected, too." It'd been horrible, too. You'd been trapped in your own body, unable to stop yourself from tearing other living things to pieces.
Later, Ian had shared his two cents with you: That the infected were suffering from psychosis. That they looked at us and saw monsters. You hadn't believed it until he'd healed Samson, who was now your community's best warrior and one-man patrol unit. On occasion, you'd even let him watch the children while you and Jimmy went out on a hunt or patrol.
Ian still regretted not having enough medical supplies to make the cure more readily available. The fact that the rest of the world had washed its hands of the UK didn't help. Surely, they would've had the tools he needed to make more. But at least he'd saved Samson, and that had to count for something.
Jimmy shook his head. "No," he rasped. "I... I wasn't infected. I was human." He huffed. "Barely." The disgust in his tone, bordering on venomous, was one you'd rarely heard from him.
That was when you understood: However horrible his dream had been, he had to talk about it. Get it out, lest it rot him from within.
You patted his back. "Do you want me to turn on the light?"
Jimmy shook his head. "No, thanks, lovey. Some things're easier t'say in the dark."
"That's true." You began to comb his hair with your fingers, knowing how it soothed him. "Go ahead, honey. I'm listening."
Jimmy gave your jaw a tender kiss, silently showing his appreciation, before speaking once more. "I dreamed way, way back. On the day the demons came. Mostly, it started the same. The strange noises drownin' out the sounds o' the telly. The blood. Me mum tellin' me tae run. Me... me father tellin' me it's the end o' days and givin' me that necklace."
You nodded, both to show that you were listening and to silently recall the tale yourself.
In a way, you'd be lucky: You'd only been about two when the virus came. Whatever you'd witnessed was stored away in the darkest corners of your mindâand it could stay there forever, as far as you were concerned. Jimmy? He'd been eight. Just old enough to remember not only the Fall, but the Before a bit as well. And sometimes, you both knew, memory could be a curse as well as a blessing.
"But here's where the story changed," Jimmy recounted, his tone more contemplative than scared now. "I... I never met Ian. He never took me in. I... I wandered the Highlands for years, dodgin' infected and survivors by the skin o' me teeth."
"All by yourself?" You nuzzled his hair, if only to dispel the mental picture. It'd only been a dream, but it was still upsetting. "I'm sorry, honey."
Jimmy swallowed. "Aye. And... and I grew up into a beast, (y/n)." His voice trembled once again, and you rubbed his back. Ready to spring back into action if the dream overwhelmed him once more. "I... I killed people. Skinned 'em. Disemboweled 'em. Called it 'charity'. Made me Fingers, who were all me for some reason, fight tae the death whenever we found a promisin' new fighter. Did things that'd make a saint swear. I..."
You could feel tears once again dampening your skin.
Then, in a terrible whisper, Jimmy said, "I stabbed me father, darlin'."
That made even you go rigid. Ian Kelson was one of the kindest people you'd ever met. He was a sweet, doting grandfather to your children, helped anyone who came to him with a sprained ankle or a broken bone, and was largely responsible for Jimmy turning out the way he had. In a world that gorged on blood and violence, Ian had taught Jimmy kindness and empathy. It'd been that very empathy that'd compelled Jimmy to save you back when you'd been but a stranger.
To imagine him dead, even in a dream, made you shiver.
But it'd been a different Jimmy, not the one cocooned in your arms. That was why your voice was free of judgment when you asked, "Why?"
Jimmy's throat worked, as though dislodging the shameful answer. "'Cause he wasn't me father in the dream. I thought Satan was, imagine that. Called him 'Old Nick'. Thought the voice was his. I only met Da once in me dream. He was kind t'me, but what did I do? Made him put on a charade for me Fingers, made 'em think he was Satan, and then stabbed him when he went off-script."
Jimmy began to cry anew, and you cradled him to your chest. Hushed him gently. Wiped his tears with the heel of your hand. "It's okay, sweetie," you whispered. "Your dad's fine. He's just pulling an all-nighter in his lab, like always."
"I-I know, but..." you could hear him grinding his teeth, your own jaw aching in sympathy, "... but it felt so real."
"I know, baby," you cupped his cheek, wiping away errant tears.
Jimmy took a few ragged breaths before forcing out the rest of his story. "Then, I... I was crucified, lovey. Upside-down. Kellieâ'cept I called her 'Jimmy Ink'âand a boy I never saw drove those nails in deep. Tied me torso up. Left me on an upside-down cross. Cried and whined on it, I did. Then, Samson came and took Father away, leavin' me alone. And... and an infected came, and..." He trailed off.
You cupped Jimmy's chin, gently guiding his gaze to meet yours. "Sweetheart," you said, "that wasn't you. None of it happened. You didn't kill your father. You never skinned or disemboweled anyone. You didn't die so miserably. You're right here, in our bed, with your father in his lab and our children sleeping downstairs."
"I know, but..." Jimmy let out a trembling sigh, giving your fingers an absentminded kiss, "... when I was there, I... I was that man."
"But you're not," you insisted, your voice firm but gentle. "You're my Jimmy. You're the leader of this community. You're strong, fair, kind, and smart." You gave him a small smile. "You're the best man I know, and the love of my goddamn life."
Jimmy's face crumpled. "And yer the love o' mine." He pushed himself forward, his lips skimming yours. Your hand moved from his chin to his cheek, holding it tenderly. Jimmy's hand found yours, pressing it into his skin.
The two of you spent the next few minutes kissing, caressing each other's faces and combing back one another's hair. It was a conversation made entirely through touch and soft breaths. A mutual reassurance.
Then, steadily, it became something else. Something more passionate.
You slipped your tongue into Jimmy's mouth. He mapped out your body with his hands, treating every inch as though it were holy. Your breaths grew heavier. Hotter. Mingling in the dark air.
You could feel the faint stirrings of desire sparking deep within you. Feel your heart thudding harder against your ribs and your head getting fuzzy.
Even so, you cupped Jimmy's face and gently pried him off you. "Wait," you whispered. "Wait."
Jimmy stopped, his eyes scanning yours. "Somethin' wrong, bonnie?"
"No," you shook your head. "I just... You were really upset, honey. I don't want you to feel like you have to do anything with me."
"I don't," Jimmy promised. He kissed one of your palms, and then the other. "I just... I love ya so much, and I love all this, our life, it's so much better than the one in the dream, I..." He gave a small laugh, "... I just wanted to celebrate it. Wit' ye."
Slowly, you nodded. "Okay. But only if you're sure."
Jimmy smiled at you, revealing his crooked and less than spotless teeth. Dear Ian had taught his adopted son many things, but one lesson he'd never been able to impose on Jimmy was oral hygiene. But fuck it, you loved him anyway.
Leaning in, he whispered, "I'm sure, love," on your lips right before he claimed them in another searing kiss.
Your lips remained firmly locked as you freed each other of your clothing. Jimmy pulled your cotton nightgown over your head while you undid the buttons of his purple silk pajamasâa find he'd immediately snatched up while scavenging in a luxury hotelâ and helped him shimmy out of the bottoms.
The moment he was free, he took your hand and brought it to his groin. Understanding immediately, you began to stroke him. Tight and slow, just the way he liked it. He moaned into your mouth, turning the sparks in your belly into a small but bright fire. His hands found your breasts, kneading them lovingly. His thumbs brushed your nipples, making you gasp in your kiss and stroke him harder, caressing the head in a way you knew drove him wild.
"So good, dove," he whispered against your lips. "Y'make me feel so good..."
You smiled in the kiss. "Funny," you remarked, your free hand cupping his cheek, "I was about to tell you the same thing."
Jimmy whimpered against your lips, your tongues locked in a delicate dance.
Your bodies moved in tandem, guided by instinct and desire. Before you knew it, you were straddling him, his hard cock pressingly against your belly. The head was lobster-red and weeping precum.
As the kiss broke and you drew back, you giggled at what you saw: Jimmy, thoroughly drunk on you. His eyes were glazed, his cheeks flushed, and his lips drawn in a wide, dopey smile. "I love ye," he panted, his tone as soft as feathers.
Your heart did a backflip. Even after almost five years of marriage, those three little words made you feel warm like no tea or campfire ever could. Adjusting your position, you took both his hands. Maintaining eye contact, you kissed his wrists. Right where, in his dream, the nails had driven through his flesh. "I love y'too. With all me heart."
Jimmy's eyes watered once again, but he was still smiling. "Put me inside ye, lassie," he murmured. "Right where I belong."
You couldn't bring yourself to disagree. Maintaining eye contact the entire time, you took Jimmy's cock in your hand and angled it towards your entrance. Slowly, carefully, you lowered yourself onto it. Let your body swallow that familiar shape, inch by precious inch.
"Fuck," Jimmy groaned, his head dropping back on the pillow. His hands flew to your hips. Not to control. Not to squeeze. Just to hold on for dear life. Your hands covered his. Trying to anchor him further as you bottomed out. You moaned at the feel of him stretching you, of his length filling out every crevice.
"Feel that?" Jimmy gasped. "S'for ye, angel. All o' it."
"Mine," you whispered back, unable to stop yourself. You began to ride him then, starting off slow. Almost testing.
Bliss washed over Jimmy's expression. His thighs twitches under you. "Let go, lassie. Fuck yerself on me, gorgeous."
You grinned. "Oh, I intend to, sweetie." You picked up the pace, if only slightly. Ground your hips against his. Tightened your muscles around his length.
"God, look at ye," Jimmy remarked, his voice rough with want. "Ridin' me like a queen. That's me girl. Takin' charge."
You moaned at the praise, squeezing his fingers as you rode him. Leaned your head back, letting yourself simmer in the heat of your lovemaking.
Jimmy began to thrust into you, fingers flexing on your hips and eyes shining like polished coins. He met your every moan and gasp with one of his own, loud and shameless. Your noises, combined with the slapping of skin against skin and the bedframe clanging against the wall, made for a song meant for lovers in the dark.
You grabbed Jimmy's hand, hoisting him in a sitting position. The moment he was in your range, you wrapped your arms around him and gave him a passionate kiss. One that he returned wholeheartedly, his hips jerking to meet yours.
Your senses were spiraling, utterly lost to the fever of Jimmy and the ache of being stretched and filled. The small fire within you grew, singeing anything beyond the here and now.
"So good," you pressed your mouth to his temple. "You feel so damn good, Jimmy... so hard, so perfect for me..."
"So're ye," Jimmy moaned, his hand sliding down your bodies. "Ye open up so well f'me... Takin' me so well... Ye were made for me, and I was made for ye..."
His fingers found your clit, rotating in tight little circles.
You cried out, writhing against him, and rode him with a ferocity that surprised even you. Chasing nirvana for you both.
All too soon, your body began to show telltale signs. The tremor of your hips. The gasps rattling through your lungs. The shivers down your spine.
Jimmy's, too. His breath was catching. His rhythm turning erratic. His almost pained expression.
But he kept pushing through. Stroking your clit with steadfast precision, he brought his lips to your ear. "Yer almost there, aren'tcha?" He kissed your earlobe. "Come wit' me, love."
You nodded frantically, your hips rocking in tandem with his thrusts. You kissed him, hard and deep, as the flames beneath your skin climbed ever higher. Your body locked. Your toes curled.
"Jimmy," you gasped, "Jimmy, sweetheartâyou feel so goodâlove you so muchâIâI'm about toâ" A broken cry cut you off as your orgasm took you hard and fast. Your release soaked your thighs and his, your hips jerking uncontrollably, your vision abandoning you for the briefest of instances.
"So beautiful," Jimmy panted, pounding into you with abandon, "my wife, my darlin', I loâohâ" he spilled thick inside you while his hips kept grinding, fucking his seed into you so you could feel it all. Every spurt. Every throb.
You collapsed onto your bed, your hands still roaming each other's bodies in gentle strokes. The sheets were damp, your skins were sweaty, and the air smelled of sex. It was perfect.
Jimmy kissed you all over, making you giggle. He kissed your pulse, which was fluttering wildly beneath his lips. Your forehead. Your eyelids. Your cheeks. And your mouth. Again and again, your mouth. Laughing softly as he ravished you.
"(Y/n), my (y/n)," he muttered against your flesh, kissing between each word. "I love ye, I love ye... I love ye wit' all I am." He drew back, gazing at you with eyes still slightly damp and bloodshot from crying. "I'd endure a thousand crucifixes just t'be near ye."
His words struck you deeper than any thrust. You cradled his face in your hands and brought your foreheads together. "You won't ever have to."
Jimmy fell asleep soon after that, his head resting on your chest and his arms coiled securely around your waist. You stayed awake a while longer, going back to combing his hair with your fingers and nuzzling the crown of his head. Waiting to see if any more nightmares would come.
Sugar on my Tongue ⢠(Vagina owning) Reader x Remmick
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Warnings!!: Period sex, blood as lube, blood eating, swearing obviously, a literal vampire eating you out on your gotdamn period because Remmick is nasty, youâre gonna need a new set of bedsheets babe
Authors note: Guess who got their stupid shark week and got inspired?? đđЏ
You woke up with a sadly familiar sticky feeling between your legs. You knew it was coming and somehow forgot to prepare yourself with a pad in your underwear before going to bed.
As you sat up, thatâs when the cramps struck. Like earthquakes all up and down your stomach.
It hurt. It always fucking does. But you didnât have any more sick days off work, so you trudged on to the bathroom to get ready.
Suck it up, buttercup.
With a fresh change of underwear and some ibuprofen to calm your aching body, you were mostly ready to take on the day.
You went back to your room to continue getting dressed. Itâs cold outside but warm in the building you work in, so you settle on some old brown corduroy pants, an olive green sweater, a tank top for an undershirt, and some compression socks with foxes printed on them.
As you proceeded to get ready, a few rapid loud taps on your window made you freeze.
You opened the curtains on your window, peering outside. It was still dark out, the sun was about to rise. You looked around to find what caused the sound and jumped when it happened again. Your eyes meet two glowing red ones.
Oh. Your boyfriend came for a visit. Early in the morning for some reason this time.
You pushed the window open with a grunt. âRemmick, what the hell are you doing? The sun could come up any minute!â
âAww, donât you worry. Jusâ wanted to see you, darlinâ,â His voice drawled with a goofy grin. His eyes were shining with want, drool dripping down the side of his open mouth.
âAh. Well,â You waved your arms in exaggeration. âYou see me. Now, I gotta get ready.â
He frowned. âWhat for?â
âWork. Iâm sorry, I forgot to tell you, Iâll be home later though.â
You hated to see the disappointment on his face. Being a creature of the night had to get lonesome at times. A hive minded âfamilyâ is fun and all, but heâd trade it all just to stay in your pocket all day long.
âWell, can I at least come in? Give you a proper send-off before going into that godforsaken job of yours?â He hummed, pulling himself up onto the windowsill, supporting himself with his elbows. âI could make ya some breakfast orâŚâ
He trailed off. You stopped trying to put your shoes on as you noticed his tenseness. He sniffed the air and his eyes seemed to glow brighter red.
Shit. Thatâs why heâs here so early. He followed the scent of you.
âOhâŚoh, myâŚâ He moaned. âI knew I smelled somethinâ bleedinâ around here.â
As much fun as it would be, you knew better than to let him in now. You canât miss another day of work. You shrugged and continued working towards leaving. âDonât know what youâre talking about, Rem.â
He chuckled darkly, pressing against the window screen. âI think you fuckinâ do, honey.â
âListen, Remmick, I gotta go to work or Iâm getting a write-up,â You sigh, now attempting to sound exasperated. âWe can do something later, alright?â
âOh. Thatâs fine. Jusâ fine. Only one little problem.â He then hopped down from the window and walked over to your car, sitting down on the hood. âHope yer not planninâ on using this.â
Son of a bitch. You crossed your arms and rolled your eyes. He smiled and crossed his legs.
âWell?â He snickered. âThought you had somewhere to be. Ainâtcha gonna go?â
âRemmickâŚâ You growled under your breath, walking through the house to the front door, slamming it open to glare at him through the screen door.
âCome on, honey,â He teased. âItâs either you come out here or you let me in. Iâm gonna fuck ya till ya cry my name either way.â
You stood firm, not budging to open the door. Thatâs when the first gleam of sunlight hit your eye. Your eyes darted to Remmick, watching as his skin began sizzling.
âRemmick, seriously, fucking stop! Youâre gonna hurt yourself!â You yelled.
âYer the one that hurting me, honey,â He groaned, raising his finger to the light, letting it catch on fire. âFuckâŚwhatâs it gonna be?â
âFine! Come in! Come in, goddamnit!!â You screamed as you swung the screen door open.
Didnât have to tell him three times.
He all but pounced like a wild animal, tackling you to the floor. You wrestled out from under him to shut the doors and immediately began to pat down the burning flesh on his arm.
âDidnât think you were ever gonna let me in,â He chuckled breathlessly. âGot yer curtains shut in yer room?â
You wordlessly nodded, still trying to fix his burns. He promptly stopped you by yanking you up into his arms and running down the hall to your room.
You protested, something about âgotta go to work,â calling him a spoiled brat of a vampire, threatening to eat garlic bread next time he comes around and such. All of it fell on deaf ears.
He dropped you onto the twin size bed and pushed you back down when youâd try to get up. His nose pressed against the tight fabric of your pants against your cunt. He began fumbling his hands with your belt and tugging down your pants.
âFuck, you smell perfect,â He moaned. âThink I wouldnât find out itâs that time of the month that easy, huh?â
You gasped as his nose roughly bumped against your clothed clit. He realized you were using a pad and a deep growl rumbled through his chest.
âWastinâ all this sweetness on a piece of paper. Fuckinâ crazy,â He mumbled as he ripped your underwear down, exposing you to the cool air of your room.
He wasted no time burying his tongue between your folds, making you jerk and moan under him. You were never prepared for how it felt when heâd take you like this. It felt like how heaven is described by religious zealots. But better. So much fucking better.
You grabbed his head and began grinding against his face. He snickered and fully pulled away, leaving you whining with desire.
âNow, now, darlinâ,â He licked his blood soaked lips with a wicked grin. One of his hands had travelled under your sweater, teasingly squeezing one of the mounds of your chest. âDidnât you say you were going to be late for work?â
âShut the fuck up, you bastard, you started this! Now either be a man and finish it or Iâll drag you to the nearest church and lock your ass inside!â You hissed.
That was all he wanted to hear.
âLove when ya talk dirty, sweetheart. Say no more.â He immediately stood up, shoved his pants down, and quickly lined himself up to your entrance. No preparation needed, he was already hard as a rock and dripping with need.
He pushed in, both of you letting out a groan at the sensations. Warm, sticky, sweet; or sweet at least in his case. The pain of cramps had been replaced by the melodic slapping of skin on skin and the vibrations of each otherâs moans.
âFuck, fuck, baby, Iâm gonnaâŚI ainât gonna last,â He whined, his fangs now glistening with your blood. âCan..can I please come inside?â
âYes, yes, Remmick, come in!!â
The both of you rode out the high, blood and cum gushing everywhere. Your bed sheets were ancient history.
His claws left indents and small scratches that youâd discover later. You never minded though.
He collapsed next to you, gasping and panting along with you. Suddenly your phone rang, breaking the silence between you. He looked over at you with a grin. âGonna get that?â
You rolled your eyes and picked up the phone, sending it directly to voicemail. His smile widened. âGood. I ainât letting you waste no more of that blood. Get comfy because yer gonna be here for a while.â
~~~~~~
Was this me projecting? Maybe.
(I whipped this together in like twenty minutes, Iâll be back with one of them requests hopefully)
For Yall that requested one shots, Iâm sorry for how long itâs taking for them to come out, my dumb ass got addicted to Animal Crossing again and work is fucking my free time with no safe word so yeah, but I promise to drop some crumbs soon!
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Here's another acapella edit, this time for Rocky Road to Dublin (movie version)! You can hear Jack's voice a little clearer, and there's a prominent female vocal in the second part that may or may not be Lola Kirke.