Growing up, people always complimented my hair. Full of spiral waves, full of energy and life. My parents kept it long because of how much they loved it. In my old photos, l see a petite child with a t-shirt and leggings (a lifelong outfit choice) with a high ponytail and locks that would rival Rapunzel. . . But I don't remember enjoying my hair. I remember the weight, the pain of individual hair follicles pulling at my scalp as my hairbrush snags on a fairy knot that sending a rush of overwhelming signals through my tiny body. I feel my tears sting my face as the person brushing my hair says, "I barely touched you. Why are you crying?" in exasperated tones. . . I remember the headaches, the two hour wash days, how warm and uncomfortable I felt when my hair trapped my body heat. When my hair is long, even though everyone thinks I look beautiful, I feel tired and heavy. . . Even as an adult I am reminded of why I prefer to keep my hair short. The wake up call for me this time was when I woke up at 4am to my partner and my toddler asleep in our bed and I was unable to move. Lifting my head caused immense pain and restriction. Then I realized they were both asleep on it, and I wouldn't be able to move unless I pulled my own hair free. . . Two days after that happened, my partner suggested I book an appointment to cut my hair. I called @curlco and met @hiltonjanie. She was so wonderful, empathetic, and gave me a huge gift when she cut 12 inches of hair and styled a short shag. I asked for bangs, explaining how my hair kept wanting to fall in front of my face because of how it grows and it was frustrating having my hair in my eyes. She nodded, and said no worries. She not only met my sensory needs, she validated them. . . When I got my formal Autism diagnosis, I spent time unmasking at home. In the last year I've learned a lot about myself, including my sensory needs. It took time to accept, but I know my hair is not just a part of my identity or a way to express myself. . . My hairstyle helps me feel confident because I can focus on what I'm doing instead trying to figure out if my hair is causing me discomfort or pain. . . My hair style is a sensory need. https://www.instagram.com/p/CUZYBx8LEcy/?utm_medium=tumblr





















