Jaylee Banks

@theherogig …

{My head shook slightly and my nose wrinkled when I heard him mention that Barbie scooter. To be honest, it took me a hot second before even remembering that commercial} Actually, I preferred the chemistry sets and telescopes over the Barbie dream house…. scooter…. dolls…. Whatever. My mom was afraid that would deem me a nerd though, and just ask for me to get picked on at school, so she compromised by not only getting me the scientific stuff I liked, but that stupid scooter too. She even got me the bike. {A slight shiver moved through me as I remembered how ugly that thing was} I don’t know what was worse about that bike…. The pink streamers, the shiny wheels with those awful charms, or the matching pink helmet with, I kid you not, hot pink glitter bedazzling it. I mean, Mom was worried about me getting picked on over my interest in science, but not that froofy bike? {I shook my head before adding} Clearly she was delusional. {My shoulders rolling into a slight shrug} Long story short, I rode the bike a couple of times, it ended in disaster, and my mom decided that my interest in science was safer, so she never pushed that other stuff on me ever again. {I added before taking another sip from my bottle of water. In hearing Tony point out to me that he wasn’t a wuss, I wasn’t sure who he was trying to convince more; me or himself. Now, for my part, I didn’t see him as a wuss, but maybe he did? Otherwise, why would he feel the need to speak up in defense of his freak out sessions} Hey, you battle monsters, aliens, and other ridiculous things on a near daily basis, so if you didn’t freak out after something like that, I’d think something was wrong with you. Honestly, I don’t know how you do it. I mean, aliens? What’s next? Flying cows or armed chickens? {Okay, so I know how nutsy that would sound, but arguably speaking, so did the idea of aliens. Who would have thought those actually existed} Yeah…. for someone who doesn’t think the “dad thing” is coming naturally to him, you already have the cheesy dad jokes down, so that’s something. {I added in teasing retort} I get it though…. We’ll talk to Mom. She travels so much for work that I’m not sure she’d care where our home base is. You know, as long as her boss would let her relocate to New York. I guess it would all really come down to what she can work out with her job. {My shoulders rolling into another carefree shrug} For the record, and I know this is a lot to process… I mean, to be clear, I don’t picture calling you “dad” anytime soon or anything like that, because I think we can both agree that we’re not there, but I’m glad you gave meeting me a chance.

While Tony was impressed that she showed such an interest in the same things he did, he was also worried that what they were currently in was a never-ending cycle. Tony’s father didn’t show him any attention or appreciation for anything he ever did, and given that Tony had just found out about his own offspring? Well, he didn’t think he had the best track record as a father, either. He was flattered that she seemed to have gotten some of the Stark genes, but in his less selfish moments, if he could sculpt the perfect child, he or she would be nothing like him.

“I’m glad you stuck up for what you believed in.” He paused to hold up his fist and acted like he was going.. fist-bump her shoulder? Shoulder-bump her? Pound her shoulder through the air? “Go you. Atta girl.”

He could literally feel himself deteriorating at how every other word that came out of his mouth showed his inexperience, but he was just glad that his vocal cords seemed to work properly after the bomb that was dropped on him.

Tony’s brows furrowed and he hung his head a little lower, eyes focusing on his shoes.

“It’s pretty weird out there, kid. An armed chicken would be the least of my worries. I’ve got suits to take care of that. Wouldn’t even have to be in one.”

And his time to start pacing came back around. He was on his feet in no time with his hands behind his back, one resting in the other, as his eyes wandered the room that was beginning to look a little familiar to him.

“Money talks. She can come to New York if she wants to. That’s not the problem.” Would Tony buy her boss off if it came down to it? Absolutely, with roughly zero hesitation. “As long as it’s what you both want.”

He shook his head, realizing how ridiculous he was sounding. He was talking to a teenager, at the approximate age of thirteen, about picking up and moving across the country to live with him, who she had known for what felt like hours, but measured out to roughly ten minutes.

“I should probably get going. I’ve got a whole lot of nothing to do and a short time to do it in. Tell your mom to call me.” He dared to make eye contact with her, but when he did, he immediately turned his head. They weren’t there yet.

Tony embarked on his own adventure of finding a pen and paper, and while the paper on the kitchen counter had some writing on it, he didn’t think it was more important than the father of her child’s number. Unlike most girls, he gave this one the correct digits, signed by ‘You Know Who I Am’.

“Make sure she gets this, alright?” He spoke as he finished writing, eyes not lifting from the paper. He placed the pen down and finally lifted his head to look at her. “And uh, yeah, call me Tony.”

@theherogig …

{It didn’t take a genius to know that Tony was only talking down about alcohol because he knew it was the “parental” or like the “adult” thing to do. I knew he didn’t really actually believe it though. He didn’t have anything to worry about though. I mean, my mom either, for that matter, because I meant what I said…. I tried it once and thought it was gross. Not something I have any intention of delving into again, so you know, lesson learned or whatever} Trust me, I won’t. I tried it once and thought it was awful. Never again. I’d rather stick to soda, to be honest. {I added honestly while my shoulders rolled into a casual shrug. Giving an approving nod though in response to Tony informing me that he knew a guy. I have to say though, I felt a little better about it when he mentioned that the guy was my age. That would make attending a new school easier for sure} Good, cause I don’t want to be that kid, ya know? The one who goes in with a rep for getting into the school only because my dad knows people in high places. I especially don’t want like the dean of students addressing me by name like we’re friends or something weird like that. That sort of thing would just make me come off as some kind of kiss ass with the other students, and I’d be labeled as the loser to avoid, cause they’d be afraid that I’d snitch on them every chance I get. I know that probably sounds foreign to you, but that’s how school tends to work these days. Kids and their stupid labels and snap judgements. It sucks at times. {Okay, so if I said something like that to my mom, she’d probably just roll her eyes and call that silly teenager thoughts. Still, she didn’t know what it was like to be a teenager. Kids found any reasons to label you and place judgement. It’s just how it worked in school} But yeah, someone my age who can show me the ropes there would be cool. {I added agreeably, but my eyes narrowed slightly in a mixture of question and slight confusion as I heard his follow up inquiry about my mom reaching out to him sooner; eluding to the fact that all of this now was about money. I know Tony told me that I didn’t need to answer that, but honestly, I wanted to. He should know me nagging my mom to reach out to him about me had nothing to do with money} Tony, me wanting to know you has nothing to do with money. I wanted to know who my dad is. Simple as that. I didn’t care if you were the richest person in the world, or you were living in a hut in Burma. I just wanted to know /you/ was all. {I shrugged casually once more, but felt a relieved smile shifting to my lips when Tony mentioned that he had been considering moving to New York until recently. Of course he didn’t come right out and say the words, but I guessed from his failed attempts to finish his partial thoughts and his circular hand gesture toward me, he was eluding that he didn’t want to just pick up and leave now after finding out he has a daughter} Good, cause yeah, I mean, I’d love to go to that school in New York, but I wouldn’t want to just up and move there if I didn’t think you’d at least come visit us, or whatever, when you were able to. {I stated as I casually retrieved the unopened, cold bottle of water from the coffee table, and then gesturingly scooted it closer to him to take when he mentioned it getting hot in here. Remembering what he said about people handing him stuff, but I figured moving it closer to him was enough to let him know that was for him if and when he wanted it, without freaking him out by actually hold it out for him to take} Yeah, I know this is all probably weird, and I don’t want to freak you out or like, scare you away, but I want to get to know you. I don’t want this to be a one and done type of thing. If it’s weird for you though, or you’re not looking to add a daughter to your already pretty demanding life, I get it. I know Mom dropped this one you out of the blue, and I’m sure it’s a shock, to say the least, so no pressure.

Tony was on the verge of panic simply because he was on the verge of panic. Was it clear by now how he operated? He lived a life that no one could understand, including him. As if his life wasn’t already as complicated as it could get, there was now a teenage offspring that was thrown into the mix with a woman he could barely remember. He really needed to get his shrink on the line, but there was a girl in front of him that he really didn’t want to run away just yet. He needed to try to calm himself and really make use of the present, unlike what he was used to doing when he charged through the days like they were replaceable.

He took in a deep breath & released it slowly, eyes meeting hers as he shook his head in response to the water. He didn’t think hydration would play any part in fixing whatever was going on with him. He shifted in his seat and cleared his throat.

“I didn’t think you two were the type. It would’ve happened long before now when you wanted that Barbie scooter on that annoying commercial. Trust me, I know you wanted it. It was crammed down everyone’s throats for years.”

Tony rolled his eyes and folded his arms across his chest. He was starting to get himself functioning more, or at least enough to form sentences.

“Just so we’re clear, I get freaked out a lot easier than I used to. Doesn’t make me a wuss.”

His image was important to him, and making himself seem like a weak, hyperventilating duckling was not the impression that he wanted to give off. He wasn’t used to feeling much of anything except for the unwanted weight on his body, both physically and mentally, so being in front of someone that was technically fifty perfect his was giving him some type of foreign feelings.

He took in what she said about not wanting him to be in her life one minute and out the next. Maybe it was because he didn’t really have that father figure in his life who ever showed him any type of compassion, or maybe it was because his next response would be what any decent human would say, but he found himself nodding and speaking immediately.

“I want what you want. I don’t think this could get any more awkward or weird for me, so just lay whatever you want on me.”

He didn’t mean it in a negative way per say, but he was just being honest because what else was he supposed to do in his current situation? He couldn’t fake the feelings that he had never been on the receiving end of, so for the time being, he couldn’t pretend to have that love a father was supposed to. Did that make him horrible? Probably. Was he used to it? Absolutely.

@theherogig…

{I gave a quick nod of agreement to Tony’s assessment about Spider-Man. The doting grin lingering on my lips as I spoke about him once more} Oh yeah, he’s pretty dreamy. A real hero…. and you know, so smooth about it too. {For all I knew, Spider-Man could be an old man under that mask…. I mean, really, he might be like in his thirties or something, which would be really gross, to say the least} Anyway, as far as not telling you about my sex life…. when there is one, you have nothing to be worried about. That’s not something I’d tell you or Mom either one. I mean, that would be really weird, right? {Not necessarily expecting an answer here, because in spite of however he might respond, that’s not a topic of conversation I’d ever feel comfortable talking to my parents about} But yeah, I don’t want to be grounded either, so I think it’s just best if that’s a topic that we always keep off the table of discussion. {My shoulders rolling into a casual shrug, before my lips pursed a bit in confusion as his remark about my mom’s private cabinets} Yeah, if you’re worried that I climb up onto the counter to fish out her alcoholic beverages when she isn’t here, there’s no need. I don’t do that. I prefer to sneak the soda she keeps hidden. {I paused. My lips pursing slightly for a second or two of thought before I finally confessed} Okay, so I did that once… The alcohol, I mean, but that stuff was gross, so you know, lesson learned. I’d never do that again. {I shrugged my shoulders casually once more. I admit, I was pretty relieved though when the topic changed to the school in New York. Glad to know we brushed right over the cabinet above the refrigerator conversation…. I hoped so, at least, cause Mom would probably ground me herself if she found out that I knew where she kept her booze} Oh yeah? You know someone who goes to that school, or do you mean like someone old who works there or something? {I asked curiously, but my face lit up a bit when he mentioned that he had some pull and could probably get me in there pretty easily} Mom and I were in New York for a couple of weeks during the summer. She was there for a work trip, and while we were there, we toured the school too. I mean, school was out for the summer, at that point in the year, so I didn’t get to see much more than empty hallways and classrooms. It looks interesting enough though, so if Mom could figure out a way to pay for it and her boss lets her transfer to New York for work, that would be cool. {As I spoke about New York though, I admittedly wasn’t as excited about the possibility of it like I was before. The only thing I could figure that accounted for that though was Tony. I mean, it figures I finally get to meet my dad, and Mom and I might end up moving to the other end of the country, so I can attend some special science school. I’d probably never see Tony again, which surprisingly bothered me, since he was a stranger to me for all intents and purposes. Still, he’s my dad, so I want to know him. Then again, after today, he might not want to see me either though, so I guess I shouldn’t get ahead of myself} You live here in California, right? Like, full time, or do you move around a lot because of work and you know, the superhero stuff too? Do you ever go to New York?

By this time, Tony was on the edge of his seat. He didn’t know that having a daughter could be so…intriguing. He kind of liked that he met her at an age when he could ask her something and she would respond, not just drool and struggle to hold her head up like all babies did. 

Tony squinted when she spoke of the topic that he was way too comfortable with when it came to himself, but suddenly didn’t like when it was being brought up in regards to her. The drinks topic, though, was much more soothing. He was afraid he would say something wrong since she was definitely not old enough for any of that, so he settled with a short response after clearing his throat.

“Bad. Disgusting. Absolutely atrocious. Never try it again.”

Years down the road, should they stay in contact, perhaps it would be a different story. For now, he would settle with lying to his own flesh and blood. Let’s face it, he had done much worse.

“I know a guy. He’s your age.”

He was suddenly feeling much more relaxed as he leaned back in the chair. For some reason, the kid made him feel like he wasn’t all that tensed up. The way he was around Peter surprised him, so he could only assume that it came as quite the shock to others, too. If only he could be the same with his own daughter.

He listened as she spoke, and although he was hearing every word she said, he couldn’t help but notice how dark and beautiful her natural hair was, and those eyes? There was no longer any need for further confirmation from him, and if one would look close enough in that moment, they could see a corner of Tony’s lip twitch as he threatened to smile.

Tony nodded slowly after hearing the money situation, and apparently he was the only one in the room who knew what was going to happen next. He was going to give her and her mother the funds to live whatever life they wanted in New York. What he didn’t know, however, was whether or not he would be in the picture. He couldn’t imagine what the next day held a lot of the time, and months after finding out he had a teenager? That only took a further toll on his predictions. He wasn’t one to just let things play out because he always felt the need to write the script on his own, but this was something that he might not have full control over.

“Alright, let me ask you this.”

He cleared his throat, straightening his posture to present himself well ahead of what he was about to ask.

“If your mom needed the money, why didn’t she come find me sooner?”

In a split-second, Tony realized that maybe he just made the first big mistake since finding out he was a parent. He wasn’t for sure how much Jaylee actually knew about the situation, so his words were far from called for. He remembered when his father would ask him things about his mother and why she did what she did, and the way he felt was something that he wouldn’t wish on anyone. He didn’t want to make it seem to Jaylee that he was only there to be a bank and not put forth any emotional effort, but it was kind of hard when he was practically made of money. Too cocky?

“You know what, don’t answer that. Not for you to know. Point blank, if New York is where you both want, I can make it happen.”

Her mother was worried about her job letting her transfer, but Tony would buy her a company where she could call the shots and never look back. Jaylee could go to her dream school, and as for Tony? Well, like always, he was still a mystery.

He took in a deep breath and released before replying to her questions regarding his residence.

“I have a place upstate. It’s more of a work in progress, but I thought about- Actually, I made plans to move there permanently before I found out about…”

He paused, his finger pointing toward her and doing a little air circle like he was afraid of saying something.

“Anyway.”

He waved his hand dismissively before placing it back in his lap.

“I don’t want to just pack up and leave now without-”

He cut himself off as he felt the collar of his suit start to become uncomfortably tight. He pulled it out from his neck as his eyes lifted to look at the ceiling.

“How did it suddenly get so hot in here?”

@theherogig …

{My eyes widened slightly in surprise, first when Tony mentioned that it was my life, so I could do what I want in regard to my whole virginity thing. Okay, normally parents were weird about that stuff, but apparently that wasn’t the case with Tony. He actually seemed pretty cool, so no complaints from me there. I blinked though when he offered to help me with that. Okay, I definitely didn’t see that one coming. Wow, he’s so much cooler in my eyes now. Makes sense too that he knew Spider-Man. Either way, my face lit up and a bright smile filled my lips at the mere thought that I might actually get to meet Spider-Man} Really? You’d help me with that? Wow! That’s so freaking cool. I love Spider-Man. He’s awesome. I sorta met him once, you know? Some idiot on a bike was speeding down the sidewalk and almost hit me. Next thing I knew Spider-Man was webbing through the air, swung down, picked me up, and moved me to a safe spot. I didn’t get to say much to him, because he went after the menace on the bike after saving me, but wow… He’s so dreamy. {I gushed without thought for a bit, but forced my attention back to the present conversation when I heard Tony speak up again. This time to clarify that he meant as a friendship, but hey, that was good enough for me. All that other stuff could come at a later time. You know, when I was ready for that sort of thing} That would be really cool of you if you’d introduce me to him, actually. And you know, no worries on the sex thing. I’m in no rush for any of that anyway. {I assured him, before casually glancing over at him when he finally sat down on the sofa} Wait…. sitting makes you feel vulnerable? Don’t your legs get tired and stuff after standing for so long though? {Barely getting out my questions when he was back up on his feet again. Wow… He sure did have a lot of energy} Was it in the form of energy drinks or espresso’s, by any chance? {I asked curiously; obviously referring to the fact that he couldn’t sit or stand still, at the moment} But yeah, I attend a Lutheran school, which is weird, cause Mom and I aren’t even Lutheran. Apparently when I questioned her on that fact though she explained that it’s a safety thing, because apparently the public schools are, and to quote Mom, “Going to hell and a handbasket.” I don’t really know what that means, but she seemed serious about it. {My shoulders rolling into a casual shrug} She’s saving up money currently though, because when I hit high school she wants me to be able to attend that Midtown School Of Science or whatever it’s called… If I could even get in there. I mean, my teachers have written recommendations for me, and my grades are certainly good enough, but apparently it’s not easy to get in there, since they’re selective in their process. {I casually explained as I quickly took the short walk to the kitchen; retrieving two bottles of water from the refrigerator, before bringing them back into the living room with me. Of course I kept the one bottle for myself, but I set the other bottle on the coffee table, in case Tony changed his mind about the whole thirst thing} Oh, and If you happen to find yourself thirsty, at any point, that bottle of water is for you. {I casually clarified while giving a gesturing nod toward the unopened bottle of water on the coffee table}

Tony was never a dad before, if that wasn’t clear enough already, but the closest he had come was taking the young buck known as Spider-Man under his wing. He couldn’t say that he saw Peter as his son at that moment, but he definitely filled a hole that had been with Tony since childhood. Peter was someone who wasn’t completely clueless but didn’t have the traction to keep up with everything just yet. Tony was always there to sort things out and to scold- my gosh, he was like a dad.

This sudden realization would have made him panicky on a normal day, but considering he was in front of his actual kid, the one he helped conceive some odd years ago, made that whole situation a little less daunting.

“Sounds like he’s a good kid. I’ll have to thank him later.”

Tony cleared his throat and slowly began his small adventure throughout the room once again. His eyes tried to find something new that he hadn’t looked at already, but they kept landing on the same photographs on the walls. He was torn between wanting to investigate them further and not looking at all, because they reminded him of the ones in his childhood home; the ones his father was never in.

Tony’s eyes were painfully shut as she mentioned the s-word again, only this time, he could confirm that she was referring to his mentee. Out of sheer awkwardness, he began wiggling his fingers and bouncing up and down in place.

“Rule number one: If you ever change your mind, don’t tell me.” He paused, his hand finally relaxing as his bouncing came to a halt. “I don’t want to know any details.”

He opened his eyes and began slowly walking once more.

“Plus if I don’t know, I can’t ground you.” He pointed to her. “Incentive.”

Playing the ‘cool dad’ was never Tony’s intention, he was just that clueless at it. He wasn’t even sure if Jaylee wanted to even keep in contact with him when he left their apartment, so he needed to stop getting ahead of himself and pump the brakes a little. If things were to work out in some sort of way, though, she would soon find out that he wasn’t the disciplinary type. He knew too much discipline all too well. He wasn’t sure if the latter was any better, but add that to the list of things he was silently panicking about.

After folding his arms across his chest, Tony looked at her with a serious expression.

“First of all, tired legs is no excuse to sit. Don’t be a wuss. Second, you know the things your mom has in her top cabinet? That’s what’s keeping me up.”

Tony puffed out his cheeks as he made his way toward his seat for the…second? Third time? He plopped down and placed an elbow on the arm rest before resting his cheek in his palm. He was past trying to look proper for her because he had failed from the beginning. If she even thought about wanting to know him, she had to realize what a mess he was from the get-go.

Tony’s brows furrowed in concentration when she talked about school. Maybe he wasn’t a very good judge, but it didn’t seem like she was too keen on the ‘private school’ thing. Tony knew her mother had the best intentions, but he was skeptical on this because he didn’t want Jaylee to end up like him in a lot of ways. He wanted her to see the world for what it was and not have the weight of it all later on in life.

He was sounding like a better person already.

He lowered his arm as he shifted in his seat. His upper body was soon leaning forward as he interlocked his own fingers and rested his elbows on his knees.

“Good school. I might even know someone who could show you the ropes.”

He had the smallest smirk as he thought of Peter.

“I, uh-” He cleared his throat as he gained his serious expression. “I have some pull. Think I could get you in pretty easily-”

He paused, brows knitting together impossibly tight. The school was at the other side of the country, so what exactly did that mean?

Here comes the nausea.

@theherogig …

{My brows furrowed a bit in confusion when I heard Tony’s question, all the while watching him making some gesturing motion with his hand as he fished for a response to his question. I didn’t immediately catch what he was asking me, until my mind returned to the topic of conversation we had been on. Well, it also helped when I replayed the statement he had made to me right before he dropped his question} Wait….. Are you subtly asking me if I’ve had sex before, or did I totally misread that question? {I asked before almost immediately adding} If that’s the case though, no, I haven’t had sex, nor do I have any desire to do so. At least not for now. I’ve decided I’m saving myself for Spider-Man. Have you heard of him? {I eventually blurted out without thought as I listened to Tony ask me about my middle name and then shot up to his feet; seemingly pacing nervously around our living room floor} It’s Maria, actually…. {I trailed off slightly. Prior to knowing Tony was my dad, I figured my mom just gave me that middle name after some relative of hers or something. Now in knowing Tony is my dad, and having done a little research of my own about him, I realized my mom gave me my middle name after Tony’s mom. A connection that I didn’t feel the need to say aloud, since I figured Tony could put two and two together on his own} And yeah, as far as personal space, it depends on who it is, and whatever my mood is at that point in time. {My shoulders rolling into a casual shrug as I eventually shifted up onto my feet; figuring I’d leave him to look at the pictures in the corner of the living room, while I grabbed us a couple of drinks from the kitchen area} Did you want something to drink? We have water, soda, milk, juice…. There’s also alcohol in the cabinet above the refrigerator, but I’m not tall enough to reach that, so if that’s what you choose, you’d just need to get a bottle down of whatever alcohol you wanted.

Tony’s face contorted in something between pain and being so awkward that he didn’t know how he still had a pulse. He almost began questioning if she was even his kid after all since she seemed to not have the same…desires that he possessed.

“I wouldn’t judge you if you did. It’s your life.”

He took in a slow, deep breath, but he immediately released it and closed his eyes when she brought up the young teen in the sticky suit. He almost shook his head, but honestly, he wouldn’t mind hooking his daughter with he-who-shall-not-be-named. He was a good kid. He needed a little extra TLC since he was just as messed up as Tony, but he was one person Tony could actually have a bond with without worrying about pushing someone away.

“Oh yeah, real charmer.” He opened his eyes as his lips formed a small smirk. “I can help with that, by the way.”

Tony pointed at her with his free hand and shot her a wink before returning his attention to the picture in his hand. He went to place the photo back onto the table like he had found it, except the frame didn’t want to sit up. He whispered a few profanities underneath his breath before he could finally get the stand to do its job.

“By the way, I meant I could set you up with a friendship with the Spiderling. Still save yourself.” He paused as he placed his hands behind his back and began to wander again. “I know I said I wouldn’t judge, but I changed my mind.”

With his back to Jaylee, Tony stopped in his tracks when he heard what his daughter’s middle name was. His eyes darted from side to side for a moment at the all too familiar name, but he cleared his throat and quickly got himself together.

“Maria… Nice name. Sounds fitting.”

He didn’t really want to go into the whole ‘that was your grandmother’s name’ thing because truth be told, he wasn’t there yet. He didn’t know how to have any bonding moments with his daughter, and one of the most uncomfortable feelings he had ever felt was when his heart grew soft; he wanted to avoid that if at all possible.

Tony spun around on his heels and faced her once again. He just hummed in response to her personal space comment before returning to his seat.

“I don’t normally do this. Makes me feel vulnerable.”

There was something about sitting down that made him feel defenseless, but he didn’t sense the girl in front of him as too much of a threat unless all of this was a plan for him to let his guard down.

And he’s back on his feet again. He walked over to the window and peered out, seeing a sight that he wasn’t used to. This made him a little too anxious, so he pulled the string that closed the blinds.

@theherogig ….

Chess? Yeah…. I’m sure that’s exactly what the two of you did that night. {I muttered out skeptically; all the while my eyes shifting into a slight roll. Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t fishing for any details from the night my parents slept together. No freaking way. I mean, ewww. I’d need therapy for sure after a discussion like that. Still though, I’m not an idiot, so I know how all of that works} For the record, I’m thirteen, not five, so I know how all that works. {Deciding there was no need to say anymore on that gross topic, and instead I opted to remark on Tony’s comment about my mom’s description of him nearly crapping his pants when he learned that I existed. At that, my shoulders rolled into a nonchalant, unapologetic shrug. Not seeing the harm in it, but deciding to humor him nonetheless} If it makes you feel any better, she did say you handled it much better than she thought you would. You know, minus her having to wake you up with ice cubes after you fainted. You didn’t have a heart attack and you didn’t actually crap your pants though, so you can take that as a victory, I would think. You’re also here now, so there’s that too. {My shoulders shrugging casually once more. My brows furrowed knowingly though when he told me how pretty my name was…. So pretty apparently that he wanted me to pronounce it for him. Who did he think he was fooling now?!} You forgot my name already, didn’t you? {My head shook slightly, before I added} I get it…. My mom told me you’re not so great with the names, and that I might need to walk around wearing a name tag if she didn’t completely scare you away with the news of my existence. {I was a little offended that he didn’t remember my name. I mean, I am his daughter for crying out loud. Still, he was here, in spite of how weird all of this was, so I’d cut him some slack for now} My name is Jaylee. {I aired out in casual response as the conversation drifted to the bouquets of flowers. Immediately shaking my head “no” when he suggested throwing them out the window} No, don’t do that. They’re pretty. My mom might prefer daisies, but I like the ones you brought with you. They’re better than daisies as far as I’m concerned. {Flowers were flowers. I really didn’t have a favorite. I just liked them in general. Not that they were for me, but still. My point was, these are pretty. I thought with a small smile when Tony set the bouquets on the coffee table instead of handing them to me. I figured he’d think I was weird if I commented on my dislike to people handing me things…. Or at least I did until he confessed that he didn’t like people handing him things either. Something I must have inherited from him} I actually don’t like people handing me things either. It makes me uncomfortable…. It’s like…. intrusive? An invasion of my person space? I don’t know if that’s the right ways to word it, but it’s how it feels.

Tony tilted his head from left to right several times, earning a small pop. He cringed at her words while shaking his head.

“Alright, you got me.”

His eyes shot open before meeting hers again. He wasn’t sure where his instincts were coming from because he was thought to be wired a different way than most humans. This feeling surprised him because there wasn’t a fiber in his body capable of thinking like a dad. Then again, being someone’s blood father didn’t mean anything unless they showed up in more ways than just physical.

“You just know how it all works, right? You’ve never…”

He used his index finger to make random shapes in front of him, not really knowing what else to say in the awkwardness of the moment. He had never been faced with difficulty speaking of the topic before, in fact he welcomed it, but it was much different with his daughter.

“Whatever. Your business, not mine. Been there.”

He rested his hand on his leg before continuing.

“Actually, I know how those guys are. I was one….am? Could be.”

He puffed out his cheeks and released a large breath, his eyes beginning their wandering session again. He couldn’t come right out and admit to his daughter that he hadn’t had physical contact with a person since he couldn’t even remember when, but that didn’t mean his mind was any different. Tony had a lot more issues with himself than what met the eye, and to trust that he was a changed man? That wasn’t going to happen overnight.

His eyes immediately went back to her when she mentioned the name thing. He simply stared, neglecting to answer any questions.

“Don’t ask me stuff like that. I have the right to an attorney.”

He couldn’t sit anymore. He got up and slowly started walking around, his eyes scanning the shelves of pictures, vases, a few deceased insects, and so forth. When he heard her speak her name, he mouthed it several times and gave her a thumbs up before shoving his hands into his front pockets.

“Got a middle name? Please don’t tell me it’s Stephanie.”

He wasn’t sure what beef he had with that particular name, but he was sure that his past could speak for it. Tony was superb at forgetting names as soon as the human’s body left his sight, and sometimes even before. That wasn’t always a bad thing because if one could look into Tony’s rear-view mirror, they would understand why the crazies didn’t make it to his memory.

He spun around and looked down at the flowers when she complimented them. Tony’s eyes shifted from Jaylee’s to the colorful petals several times before he eventually nodded. She also piqued his attention when she also admitted to the discomfort of things being handed to one person from another. Tony rocked back and forth several times while pursing his lips.

“The concept of personal space is a doozy. Sometimes I love it, other times I hate it. Depends on which day you catch me on. This you?”

{I could see he was unsure about joining me in the living room area…. I mean, what did he think was going to happen? That I’d smother him with a throw pillow or something? He’s Iron Man for freaking sake. Either way, he did eventually join me in the living room, then when he took a seat in the chair, I plopped down onto the sofa. My attention now on him as I waited to hear how he’d respond to my questions. My face dropped though when he admitted that he knew exactly why he was here, but that he didn’t know if he made the right call. Was I really that bad? He did add a little clarification to that original statement, but it didn’t make me feel all that much better, to be honest} I figured most of it out on my own. All my mom did was confirm that I was right about you being my dad. She did say you guys met at some party or something, hung out, and then nine months later, I was here. She said you two hadn’t talked since. {My shoulders rolled into a shrug, before adding} Until recently when she dropped by your house. She said she thought you were going to crap your pants when she told you about me. {I probably wasn’t supposed to tell him that part, but oh well. What’s done is done} As far as where to start, do you want to know anything about me? I assume you know my name, but probably not much else. My mom said I’m a lot like you in the sense that I enjoy talking about myself…. and well, she’s not wrong in that. I do like to talk about myself, so I’ll tell you whatever you want to know.  {I casually added as I sipped on my Pepsi; eventually sitting the can down on the end table beside the sofa} The flowers are pretty, by the way…. Did you bring them for my mom? She likes flowers… all flowers, but for future reference daisies are her favorite.

Tony’s head tilted slightly to one side when she explained how she figured it out on her own. Smart kid. Must be in the genes to let absolutely nothing go until there answers arise. His head aligned as his brows lifted at the words that followed. He cleared his throat and knitted his brows together.

“Sounds about right. A few games of chess and we’re here. Everything else is history.”

He was unsure how old teens had to be before they had that talk, so he would keep quiet about it. His eyes left hers to concentrate on a small vase on one end of the room. He had to concentrate on something to keep himself from being too in the moment and absolutely losing it. Did the vase have flowers that Hilary had forgotten to water? Was it the ashes of her deceased father? Was her father different from his and actually showed her that he cared? So many thoughts that weren’t related to the current situation in the slightest.

His head snapped toward...his daughter’s. He was about to crap his pants? Who put those words together and decided that it was an okay sentence?

“Unfortunately, having an offspring wasn’t on my agenda that day. Took me by surprise, and can you tell her to come up with something better than I tried to crap my pants? It was more like…minor heart palpitations.”

He leaned back in the chair and placed the bouquets in his lap before folding his arms across his chest. He listened to her speak, and boy, did her mouth have a motor. He didn’t think he talked that much as a kid, so it must have been from her side. The dash of arrogance, though, he’d take credit for.

“Your name…is pretty. So pretty that I would like for you to let me hear how you pronounce it. Now.”

He paused as his mind searched every crack and crevice to remember her name. Nothing.

“Talking about yourself gets easier. You get used to it.”

He looked down at the bouquets in his lap when she complimented them, then shot them down just like that. He unfolded his arms and sighed as he reached down to grab both of them with each hand.

“We could just chuck ‘em out the window and no one would ever know.”

His eyes lifted to meet hers, a brow raised at his bright idea.

“You know what, that’s probably littering. Let me just-”

Remaining in his seat, he leaned forward to place the bouquets on the table before leaning back empty-handed.

@theherogig …

{All I needed was for him to confirm that he really was Tony Stark. I mean, talk about fifty shades of awkward if I referred to this guy as “dad,” or worse, made a statement about him being my dad, if he wasn’t even Tony Stark. My mom kept all of this dad stuff a secret from me for years. Always just saying it was someone she was with once and never saw or heard from again. Of course she conveniently left out the part about my dad being Tony Stark… AKA, Iron-Freaking-Man. Like seriously, why would she keep something like that from me?! Talk about the worst mom of the year award for that one. Anyway, after I found the box of things she kept hidden, and managed to locate my birth certificate too, I figured out on my own who my dad was…. At that point, it was just a matter of my mom confirming as such, and then giving some crappy explanation as to why she kept it from me. Parents can be infuriating at times. Ugh. All that aside though, I’ve gotta say when I woke up today, I didn’t have any idea that Tony Stark would actually show up at our front door. How did he find us though was the question? And for that matter, why now?} Yeah, she’s on a work call….. Sorry for shutting the door in your face before, by the way. {I started to say as I glanced back toward the hallway area, then yelled out} Mom? There’s someone here to see you! {Figuring it would be awhile before she joined us though, since she was usually on the phone forever when it came to work calls. While we waited, I gave a nod toward the living room area} Do you want to sit? We have a decent living room. {I offered while my eyes never left him. I had so many questions for him, but I didn’t know where to start. Either way, I did put the tennis racket down, since I figured I wouldn’t need it now, and then as I started toward the nearby living room area, I stopped to look back at him} Do you know who you are? {Okay, so that was a weird question} I mean, obviously you know you’re Tony Stark…. Iron Man…. and all of that. That’s not what I meant. {I gave my head a light shake as I tried again} Did my mom tell you about me, I mean? Is that why you’re here, or does Iron Man make random house calls to fans now or something? {I wasn’t trying to make things awkward, and I didn’t want to put him in a weird position, so I didn’t just want to come out and say the “D” word, just in case he doesn’t know he’s my dad. I guess this way I could try and feel that out and see where it goes}

Of course she was on a call and unable to make it to the room, because why would she conveniently come in and save him from the situation that he didn’t have the ability to navigate?

“Whatever. Didn’t think anything of it.”

His eyes left hers and began to wander. It was a decent place they had for just the two of them, or so he suspected. He didn’t get around to asking her about her personal life considering he was busy concentrating on how his heart was shriveling up and falling out of his body at the thought of having a child.

Tony’s head whipped around when the daughter caught his attention. He paused, studying her question as if it required a formula.

“Ah….sure.”

He hesitated before following her toward the living room. He took a seat on a chair, making sure that no one could sit next to him; he wasn’t ready for that yet. He scanned the room, looking for anything yet nothing at all. He just needed to be doing something to distract his mind from what was really going on.

His eyes met hers when she spoke. He had raised a brow at many questions over the span of his life, and that one was no different. He knitted his brows together and reached up to rub one of his temples while he decided that it was going to be a long evening.

“First of all, Iron Man’s not a toy. The whole party thing was one time and the peeing in the suit is for emergencies only. Whatever, enough of that.”

He paused long enough to fold his arms across his chest. He released a breath before continuing.

“I know exactly why I’m here. I gotta be honest, I don’t know if I made the right call.”

He obviously needed to follow up after that because there were so many ways that one sentence could be taken. He could feel a headache brewing already.

@theherogig …

{I didn’t hear the sales guy knock again, so I figured I successfully got rid of him, and now he’s going to peddle his flowers off on someone else here in the apartment building. By now I had made my way to the kitchen area, so I could sneak a soda from the refrigerator, since my mom had been pulled away on a phone call for work. Only, I no sooner popped the top of the can and took a drink of my Pepsi when I heard the front door open. My eyes widening as I peaked out from the kitchen to the front door area. As I did so, my eyes immediately fell onto the guy with the flowers. Now, at this point in time I was somewhere between grabbing a large knife from the kitchen, throwing the Pepsi in the intruder’s face, or screaming for my mom…. Maybe a combination of the three} Dude, what the hell?! {I blurted out in a shaky voice. Ballsy, I’ll give him that. Only, as I heard him speak and he came more into my view, I realized there was something eerily familiar about him. I mean yeah, obviously I had recognized him as the guy I had just sent away, but there was more to it than that. It was like I knew him, which made no sense at all} Wait…. what? Old person humor, right? {Catching what he said, but not really understanding it at all. Reminding myself that old people tend to say lame things when they’re trying to crack a joke, so I let that one drop. I silently thought to myself as I now held my soda in my one hand, while I grabbed the tennis racket tucked in the hallway with my other hand; holding both in a tight grasp as I approached him. Maybe it was a little stupid of me to not be screaming for my mom at this point in time, or I don’t know, maybe alerting the police, since either scenario would make more sense than what I’m doing now, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that there was something familiar about him. I stood there for several seconds with my “defensive weapons” in hand before I realized why he looked so familiar} Wait… Are you…? How are…. What are you…..? {I trailed off. It was like I had a million questions to ask him, but the fact that I was kinda stunned to see him standing here face to face with me was surreal. I think that’s the right word. Either way, I cleared my throat as my eyes scanned his face once more; wanting to make sure this was the same guy from the pictures I saw before I said anything stupid. It was him. Definitely the same guy, but how? My brows furrowing in a mixture of question and confusion as I finally blurted out} You’re Tony Stark, right?

That definitely wasn’t the first time a woman nearly busted his eardrums, but nine times out of ten, there was a different reason behind it. He stuck the tip of his middle finger inside of his ear and wiggled, slacking his jaw in an attempt to hear a small pop and regain hearing.

He soon held his hands up, admitting defeat, but furrowed his brows and tilted his head to one side when he heard a comment she made. Did she…? Yeah, she did. She called him old.

He had parted his lips to come to his own defense, but when he got a good look at her again, he was speechless. His chest deflated as he lowered his arms to his sides, the two bouquets still in his grip. He stared at her in silence for several seconds, allowing her to get everything out of her system. He was in a very, very unfortunate situation, because judging by her reaction, she had no clue that he was someone other than a billionaire with armor.

He sighed and lifted one hand with a bouquet, using the back of his hand to wipe the beads of sweat off of his forehead. He also slipped off his glasses on the way to put his hand back down at his side.

“If you want to get technical, I’m-”

He cleared his throat. Not yet.

“Yep, that’s me. In the flesh.”

He displayed a small smile. He could not have put himself in a more awkward situation if he tried. There was this teenager, who wanted nothing more than to fight him in that moment, who was unknowingly a product of him. He had solved a lot of things in his years, but this situation was something that he couldn’t find the next step to.

He knew in his heart that he shouldn’t be the one to tell her. For all he knew, her mother had changed her mind; he left enough time to. As calmly as possible, he spoke.

@theherogig …

{Some days I thought my mom was the coolest person on the planet, and other days, I strongly considered running away from home, because I hated her. Today happened to be one of those days. At times, she could be so unfair. I mean, I wasn’t hurting anybody by listening to one of my favorite songs here in my bedroom. It’s not my fault that my mom’s taste in music is prehistoric, so she wouldn’t know great music if it slapped her across the face. Case and point when she not only insulted one of my favorite singers of all time, but just to be that much more of a pain in my butt, she told me to turn the song down. Yeah right. She’s dreaming if she thought that was going to happen. I thought in defiance as I did just the opposite of what she asked of me and made the music even later. I’ll teacher her a lesson. I guess given the mood my mom’s been in these last several weeks though, I shouldn’t have been that surprised when she gave me one more warning to turn down the music before she just took it upon herself to handle it on her own. Of course her way of “handling it” was stealing my CD player altogether, which just made me angry} Mom, you suck! {I yelled out to her as I slammed my bedroom door behind her and then locked it. My eyes automatically scanning my bedroom to see what I could annoy her with next, as a means of retaliation. I’ll teach her to steal my music. I thought in payback mode as I continued glancing around my bedroom. Only, before I could figure anything out, the sound of someone knocking on the front door caught my attention} I’ll get it! Wouldn’t want to disturb your work! {I yelled back to my mom sarcastically as I unlocked and then opened my bedroom door, before making my way through our apartment to the front door. Once I reached it and opened the door, my brows furrowed in seeing a kinda familiar looking guy standing on the other side holding two bouquets of flowers. He didn’t immediately say anything. Kinda looked like a creepy statue, if we’re being honest here. Either way, he had his chance to speak…. I gave him a whole second, maybe two, which was generous of me, so when he lost his chance to talk, I decided if he wasn’t going to start out the conversation, then I would} If you’re here to sell flowers, or really, anything else, we’re not interested. Bye. {I said flatly in response before closing the door in his face} “Who was it, Jaylee?” {My mom was asking as she left her office area and stood in the hallway where she could see me} A flower salesman, I think. I don’t know. {I gave a casual shrug as I paid no more mind to the man on the other side of the door, and started to walk away instead. I figured if he knocks again, I was wrong about him trying to sell us something, but if he doesn’t, then he took my hint and I got rid of an unwelcomed salesman. No harm, no foul}

Tony had been through a lot of horrific events in his life, but none were as agonizing as those few seconds of waiting. He gulped, but the large lump in his throat made it extremely difficult to swallow. Luckily, the anticipation wasn’t going to eat him alive for much longer, because he heard footsteps growing louder, which meant they were coming in his direction.

This is it. What was he going to say? He had nothing planned, because no matter which direction he took, nothing would be enough to make everything okay. It wasn’t entirely his fault that she was kept from him for so long, but he was definitely guilty for the majority of it; actions had consequences.

As the door swung open, he expected to see the woman that showed up to his house several weeks prior, but he did not. His eyes were met with a dark-haired girl, who was the first female to ever make his heart completely stop. She was absolutely beautiful, and those eyes looked as though he was staring into his own reflection. He was truly at a loss for words for the first time in his life. His lips slowly parted to speak, but instead, his eyes widened upon hearing her words and her harsh departure.

Okay, that was a first. No woman had ever quite literally shut the door on interacting with him, so he was at a total loss on how to react.

He had no doubt in the world in that moment that she was his. However, was it possible to not like his kid already? Number one, he was Iron Man: a fairly well-known individual that strived to bring world peace. Did the news not exist for teenagers these days? He couldn’t complain too much, because he preferred that she didn’t see how the media portrayed him anyway.

He was stunned. His mouth was capable of catching flies, and both bouquets laid on the ground after his arms fell limp. Was that a sign? He wasn’t great at picking up on those, so maybe he needed to read between the lines. Yep; this was a mistake.

He finally sealed his lips together and scooped up the flowers. He turned to walk away and got a couple doors down before he shoved both bouquets in the trash can along with his pride. He sighed and scratched the back of his head as he walked away, only to stop a few feet later. Ahead was a middle-aged man holding the hand of a little girl who couldn’t be older than three. She was doing a little hop every step, and her giggles showed how much enjoyment she got out of a simple walk. Tony’s head turned to follow them as they walked past, and soon enough, his body turned, too.

He couldn’t put a finger on what took over him, but he approached the trash can and scooped up the flowers before making his way back to the apartment. He was a little more comfortable in his skin this time, so with a quick deep breath, he lifted his fist to knock again.

Only he didn’t knock. He just turned the knob and swung the door open.

Before he could even get all the way inside, he started speaking.

@theherogig …

{I gave an understanding nod in response to Tony’s subtle agreement for me to leave, so he has some time to process all of this} Really, Tony? {I said with a shake of my head in response to him already forgetting my name. I swear, just when I start to feel bad about keeping our daughter a secret from him for all this time, that feeling immediately passes as soon as he opens his mouth again. If he has managed to forget my name this many times in the short amount of time that I have been here at his house, probably by the time I leave, he’ll conveniently forget we ever even had this conversation too. My point being, now more than ever I was standing behind my original decision just to raise our daughter on my own. Had I let Tony help me raise her, for all I knew he would have sent her up with the aliens as some sort of peace offering, or else just absentmindedly left her somewhere and forgot where. My head giving another shake as I put my contact information into the device, then once I handed it back to him, I shifted up from the floor, and onto my feet} The ball is in your court, Tony. {Was all I said in departure as I left the room, and then made my way toward the staircase, so I could ultimately take my leave from Tony’s house. I figured the drive back would give me time to decide how much of this, if any at all, I would decide to share with Jaylee}

Tony cringed when her tone alone scolded him. He had a lot on his plate, and her name was the absolute last thing he was concerned about. He would remember her face for certain next time, so didn’t that count for something?

Her words sent a shiver up his spine. He would decide the fate of that girl, his daughter, whether it would help her or wreck her. He couldn’t say for sure what the future held for him at that point, but he was going to try everything in his power to do the right thing, whether that meant to work on patching up the past or leaving himself out of the picture for good.

He knew first-hand what it felt like to have a father who never showed him he loved him, and he often thought about how much different his life would be if he never had that person in his life at all. Maybe he wouldn’t be constantly walking on eggshells with himself and thinking that he wasn’t good enough, or maybe loneliness and the what ifs would have been the worst of all.

Soon, Tony was left in a silent mansion. He sighed and stared off into the great beyond for several….minutes? An hour? Then, he finally decided to get himself up and get some work done.

And busy he was. He built everything from prototypes to a robotic dog named Tinker. Tinker was about as annoying as any piece of machinery could have been.

“Not the rug! Not the-”

He sucked in a slow, deep breath before mouthing ‘whatever’ and rolling his eyes. Oil on the rug served as a nice distraction from the equation he was trying to solve in his own mind.

It had been several weeks since he last spoke to….her. He had no contact with the outside since then, and he couldn’t say he hated it. He had a lot of time to focus on things going on in the basement, so much time that when he came out to go upstairs, it felt foreign to him. That’s what he got for deciding that his entire life revolved around one room and the things inside of it.

Those weeks didn’t come without difficulty. He tossed and turned all night, and remember that dream he had been having constantly? Well, now his daughter was drowning with him. He tried to fight the paralysis each time to get to her, but to no avail. He would wake up in cold sweats and headed straight to his personal bar, which resulted in him getting two hours of rest each night on average. it showed, too, because his facial hair was scraggly and- Wait, was that a gray hair? 

A nice hair trim was overdue, which he entrusted Dum-E with. He did a superb job, which resulted in Tony allowing him to wear a hat that said “number one son” for the next week.

After he was all freshened up, he made that sandwich that he had been craving. It was nothing too fancy, just the usual, but it tasted so good because he hadn’t had the time to concentrate on nourishing his body recently, if he ever did to begin with.

He kicked back on the couch with a content sigh and put his feet up on the coffee table. The television in front of him was already tuned into Downton Abbey for obvious reasons, so he left it. It was decent, but the scenes didn’t grasp him enough to take him away from reality.

Only a couple of bites in and he was full. He tossed the sandwich to the ground, and here came number one son with his handy dandy broomstick. He grunted as he got up off of the couch and flicked Dum-E’s hat as he walked past him, but not with enough force to make it fall off his….head?

He acted as if nothing was on his mind as he descended the stairs to his lair, rubbing the palms of his hands together. However, acting wasn’t his strong suit, and he wasn’t fooling himself.

“Jarvis, I need a favor, buddy.”

When Jarvis announced his presence, Tony didn’t answer right away. Instead, he stared off into space for the last time before making the life-changing call.

“Bring up-”

He stopped, eyes slamming shut as he searched in his mind in desperation. He snapped his fingers several times as he struggled.

“The woman. The one who was here-”

Jarvis: “Hilary Banks?”

“Yep, that’s the one. I need her address.”

He opened his eyes and folded his arms across his chest. 

Jarvis: “Mind if I ask what for, sir?”

“We’re going to be paying her a little visit.”

Once he got the street address for his destination, Tony ascended the stairs and went straight to his bedroom. He opened his closet, which held some of his finest suits. He pulled out one at random and made the clothing changed. His favorite pastime used to be staring at himself in the mirror, but knowing where he was going suddenly made him a little less confident.

It was the glasses. It had to be the glasses. Where were his glasses?

He located them and slipped them on, but neglected to shoot his reflection the usual wink; he was way off his game.

For the first time in a month, he left his place of residence and was behind the wheel, which he gripped so tightly that his knuckles were turning white. He would be lying if he said that he didn’t think about turning around more than once, but this is what he had to do. His life was based around all of his wrong-doings. The media would never let him forget the mistakes he had made and still does, but what they didn’t know? He was his toughest critic. He knew that he wasn’t someone that any normal person would want to be around and put their faith in, but if he had learned anything since his kidnapping, it’s that any situation could be turned around.

The car screeched as it stopped abruptly on the side of the road. The flowers were screaming out to him, and so was the man who was apparently a fan of his. Tony tried to keep the youngster as calm as possible, even giving him a signature on the forehead. For being such a great supporter, he tossed a few large bills at him and told him to keep the change before he was on his way again.

It wasn’t long before he pulled into a parking lot, which belonged to the apartment complex that she lived in. He pulled into a spot and cut the engine off before contemplating life for a good, eh, thirty minutes. It felt like he had all of the time in the world to waste, but that was about to change.

His legs were wobbly as he stepped out of the vehicle. With a bouquet in each hand, he closed in on the apartment building. He kept mouthing the apartment number so he wouldn’t forget it, but his mind had left his body so long ago. He didn’t blame it, because he would run away from the trembling mess, too. Tony of all people couldn’t accept the fact that he had weak moments, and with the number that he kept repeating coming into view, he felt like the smallest human on Earth. Every emotion rushed through him at once, causing the air to leave his lungs as if someone had smacked him in the back. Was he doing the right thing? Was another life going to be ruined because of his selfish choices?