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to make it more lynchian can't you read

me putting the little tag back on the bread bag

minos was such a pussy. if my wife gave birth to an epic minotaur baby i wouldn't have locked him in a labyrinth. i would have taken him to the mcdonalds play place (athens) every day and let him eat as many stray mcnuggets (athenians) off the floor as he wanted. i love you hungry son

(pulling a painted vase out of my wallet) and this is my youngest at his first nose ring fitting. isn't he handsome

hello ethereal anime girl artist. Before you is a pencil and some paper. If you can sketch out a fat person, you can go free. Fail, and this rube Goldberg machine will activate the guillotine that kills you bad

[louder than everyone] MAN I THINK IT DEPENDS!

"all you ever do is complain" that's not true. I also resent.

oh my god all the new fnaf announcements im gonna hurl

all i wanna do is eat nectarines and think about aurora borealis st. elmo’s fire gigantic jets ball lightning green flash earthquake lights and will-o-the-wisps

see she gets it

yeah she's a total nepo baby. I heard her dad was one of floop's fooglies

in my little pony universe youd go to a job interview and theyd be like so how does your cutiemark reflect your dedication to this position. And every time youd have to spew some bullshit about how your cutiemark of two tennis rackets actually means youre a team player and good at multitasking and view the market like a playing field. or whatever. and you wouldnt even get the job

Thanks to Equestria v Sugar Sprinkle, cutie mark interview questions are considered hiring discrimination, so if anypony asks you any cutiemark related questions or even alludes to any questions about your cutiemark such as "In your own words, describe your life purpose" you can and should refuse to answer. Know your rights, ponies.