· “wtf it’s like the third to last day of school and you walked into the wrong classroom what even are you” au
· “hey so I gave you a fake name when I ordered my coffee but you wrote your number on my cup and we arranged a date now how do I tell you that the foundings of our relationship were based on a lie” au
· “I need to break into this classroom to get my pencil bag back, and someone told me that you’re good at picking locks sTOP LAUGHING I NEED MY PENCILS” au
· “I’m a doctor and you’re apparently here because… oh. You have an entire carrot shoved up your ass. I’m trying my best to be professional but oh my god why a carrot and not something that’s, I don’t know, not pointy and edible” au
· “i’M SO SORRY I THOUGHT THAT FITTING ROOM STALL WAS VACANT WHY DON’T THESE THINGS HAVE LOCKS” au
· “I have terrible aim and was trying to throw this raw egg at my friend from far away and I’m sO SORRY THIS WASN’T SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN shit you’re really cute but nOW YOU’RE CRYING I FUCKED UP” au
· “I tripped on nothing in the middle of the hallway and people are staring and I want to die but you spontaneously trip and lie down on the ground with me thank you you’re an angel” au