Nothingness is eternal

“No, he didn’t start it. He’s finishing it.” Xigbar corrected.

The one and only thing he actually knew about his Master’s plan was that it was supposed to be the end, not the beginning. For good or bad hardly even seemed to matter at this point.

“Well, duh I kept it to myself.” He retorted, rolling his eye. “Telling people that I’m a Keyblade Wielder from before the worlds were split is just inviting trouble.”

And not just from Xehanort either, there were other, worse enemies that Xigbar had to stay hidden from.

“Poor outcome? As if, that was perfect… Well, maybe not ‘perfect’ it did take a ridiculously long…” Xigbar sighed, “All I needed was the clash between Light and Darkness.” Xigbar did not have an answer for what happens next though.

“You know, I’ll ask what happens next when I see him.” He said, “If I see him again. I told you, he’s kinda MIA at the moment.”

That was actually a good point... so Xemnas decided not to comment on it. It was ridiculous to have somehow expected that he’d had any true allies in the Organization. Everyone had had their own agenda, moreso than he had realised. It hadn’t mattered at the time, as long as everyone fell in line. 

He wouldn’t have expected that Xigbar was pleased with the outcome of the war, though. “And if Xehanort had succeeded?” he questioned, “Would that have been a good outcome too?” 

𝙍𝘼𝙄𝙉 -   melancholy at best , introspective , severely misunderstood , pleasure in the subdued , helping in your own way , dreams in poetry , the slowness of falling asleep , refreshing meditation .

𝙎𝙐𝙉 -     sunbleached clothes , futures that are too bright , everything at arm’s length , balancing intensity , blind encouragement , comfort of sleep , distracting sunspots in your vision , necessity of growth .

𝙎𝙏𝙊𝙍𝙈 -     chaos with a purpose , emotions running high , natural comfortable anarchy , high volume , leaving your mark , brief flashes of violence , rambling quickly , the intensity of desire .

𝙒𝙄𝙉𝘿 -     running towards instead of away, instinctive motivation , making an impact , knows everyone who knows anyone , playful pranks , mood swings in a split second , collecting old trinkets , uncontrollable focus .

“Nothing ‘befell’ him as far as I know.” Xigbar said, “He gave us all our roles and then one day he just up and vanished.”

Luxu had actually already been long gone by the time the Master of Masters left, but he had stuck around close enough to watch the fall out. It was close enough to feeling abandoned as well, even if Luxu had to comfort of knowing that he would see the Master again one day.

As if that ‘comfort’ did him any good over the ages though.

“It’s been a very long time. Forgive me for skipping a few details ” He said. "Once I was given my role, I set out and have been watching the future unfold ever since and let me tell you, it hasn’t been a very fun ride.”

Surprisingly, Xigbar actually felt better admitting it, like a weight was finally being taken off his shoulders.

It was all starting to dawn on Xemnas. “So your Master... is he the one who started all of... this?” The Keyblade War, Xehanort’s obsession, the reason for why Xemnas even existed in the first place, was it all something that had been a part of this mystery Master’s plan? Xemnas wasn’t sure what to think about any of it, his mind still struggling to put all of the pieces together. 

A pout and slight glare appeared on Xigbar’s face when Xemnas needed the clarification.

“I’m only going to admit it once, Xemnas.” He said after a second of consideration he continued, “Actually, there’s a lot I’m only going to admit once, so pay attention.“

Xigbar would much rather not be admitting any of it, but if he was going to tell anyone, why not Xemnas. Who was the former Superior going to blab to? Certainly no one in the World That Never Was, there was no one else here for him to blab to. Still, any details that could be left out, Xigbar would happily skip over.

loneliness of the mask

“You’re directionless and lost. I get it.” Terra leaned against a tree, folding his arms as he looked out over the ocean below their castle. “I’m still trying to figure out what my roll is here. Master Eraqus always guided us, and sheltered us, without him, and without a clear goal, all I can do is… whatever I can do.” Well that was vague.

“I help the scientists at Radiant Garden, contribute to their research as much as I can. I keep my family safe… I just, keep going, finding little goal after little goal, hoping to find a major one.” He turned back to Xemnas with a smile.

“I even took up research of my own. Building generic keyblade armor, and maybe gliders. Something to train the new wielders on until they can summon their own. I can tell you its slow progress getting any new knowledge through this thick skull of mine, but, its something.”

Xemnas was definitely lost. His existence had been a short one, and his only purpose during that time had been to follow the plans laid out for him by his Master. It had been all he knew how to do, so what could he do now that his Master was gone and he had nothing. Nothing but an empty world and an empty castle. No friends, no allies, nothing. 

“Xehanort gave me purpose. Reason for being. I would not exist if not for him.” Terra knew that of course. “I am not like the other Nobodies. They had pasts, memories, no matter how buried, that were their own.” Ironic as it was, Roxas and Xion had been the closest in the original Organization to having the same experience as he did. Without memories of their own, or a past that belonged to them, created because of someone else. Used as tools. It was an uncomfortable thought. And even so, the kids had made friends, and they had someplace to belong, people who cared about them. 

“It’s exactly what it sounds like.” Xigbar mumbled and looked away, betraying how touchy the subject really was for him.

Among all the things that he had been hiding from people his whole life, that was the secret that Xigbar kept the most guarded. When he had been young it was a simple fear of rejection, but Xigbar liked to think it was more complicated than that these days. 

“That’s not something I like to bring up casually.” He said, “You’re lucky I like you so much.”