bad news

as bitter as it might feel, it's also another reality check about their current situation right now. despite everything, it's still hard to communicate with the other boy. he wants to deny, tell insu that he's wrong and that he's completely fine—but he can't, all he can do is stand there awkwardly as insu clearly refutes him. states the facts without much hesitation, as if he knows how to pry into yuwol's brain. in a way, insu does, insu used to be the only one who could.

yuwol doesn't know how to respond, in the face of the insu he once knew. of course it's not always black and white, how they ended up had been a mess of emotions filled with fights that sometimes only felt one-sided—but that wasn't how they always were. before all this, insu had cared. before all this, insu could make yuwol believe that love can exist, for someone like him. in the face of that gentleness, yuwol finds himself at a loss—what is he supposed to say to that? what can he say?

"i guess you're right," he admits, taking back his things and slowly putting them into his bag. if he can't lie, then he supposes he shouldn't. "maybe i'm not... okay. but that... it's not really any of your concern, right? you kind of made that clear... last time." yuwol replies, taking in a sharp breath, before letting it out again. he doesn't want to start another argument, his voice is soft and his tone is meek—he's just stating what was already obvious. there's a reason why the two of them didn't work out.

for a moment he just stares at the other after yuwol speaks, slightly squinting as he thinks before giving a small shrug of his shoulders. "you're right, it really shouldn't be any of my concern." yuwol is in fact right. that's why he doesn't feel sorry for himself with the words that are spoken to him, rather he thinks back to the times when he wouldn't concern himself with a single damn thing that the other would do or even whatever would happen to him. "even so, my time away from here had me thinking some and now it sort of is. so what is it?"

he himself is still trying to figure out why he's dead set on figuring out what's wrong with yuwol, though he'd figure that all out later when he was back home in his own apartment. for now he would do his best to figure out what the hell was bothering the other male so much and making him give the expressions that he's currently giving. that's why, once he's managed to drag yuwol off to a more quiet section of the mall, he finally stops and abruptly turns, not letting go of the others wrist.

though it seemed while he was trying to keep an eye on what was going on around him, he ended up bumping into someone else. he has to stop himself from almost falling since he knew that could be embarrassing. he didn't need to deal with feeling that way at the moment but he felt bad for the other's phone.

giving a small shrug before picking up his phone, insu looks at the male in front of him before finally speaking once again. "it's all good. actually this gave me the perfect excuse to get a whole new phone.... and number.." the last part is mumbled as he shoves the device into his pocket.

he glares, and all but pouts at insu, figuring he ought to be obedient because damn. he did feel tired. but! but! "one more for the road? i promise that..... if you let me get one more yogurt soju before we leave that i'll actually leave with you, no more being argumentative?" the boy tries to bat his bambi eyes at insu but he knows its probably not working. "seriously, its as if i drank everything for the two of us. you are being no-fun! which, y'know, you're not designated driver. lighten up!"

fighting the urge to just drag minsoo's ass out the door and ignore the other, yet another sigh escapes before shaking his head. "fine, just one more and that's it. but don't blame me tomorrow for the major hangover and headache you're going to have." he says this before glancing over at the bar, his inner voice warning him against giving in to the other, though if it means that minsoo will cooperate with him and go home after... well, it would be worth it.

see, there's always that deep plunge from feeling alright to feeling completely insane. whatever is in front of him is a blur, but it really sounds familiar. "oh? what do you mean, i'm not up, i'm right on the ground," minsoo says before taking a rather deep plunge - yep, seems like he's missed a rather large step. "i'm okay!" he says, as if minsoo wasn't faceplanted against insu's arm right now. "why does it sound like you're not having as much fun as me?"

he tries to be quick with reaching out, trying to stop the other from falling on his ass. thankfully he manages to somehow, awkwardly, catch minsoo before letting out a heavy sigh as he looks at the other male. "that's because i'm not. just how much have you had to drink? you're so shitfaced right now that i'd believe you had a whole keg of alcohol." he says, squinting at the other male as if to show that he's trying to assess just how much the other really did have to drink.

maybe back then, insu would be the person yuwol tells about the plight in his life. the fact that he's basically been trapped by his parents lately, unable to step a foot outside the door without checking in, having a curfew at this age. but not anymore, clearly. if they had stayed friends, instead of trying out a romantic relationship, would things have been fine? he doesn't know the answer to these questions, but there's no use asking anyway—there's no undoing the damage that already exists.

"you really don't have to..." yuwol insists, his voice even softer than it usually is. it's strange, in front of insu like this he feels kind of small. memories of their constant fighting flash through his mind as insu draws closer, now just a few feet away from him. even though he isn't looking up, he can tell that insu is glancing at him every now and then—honestly, it makes him nervous. he doesn't know what insu is thinking after all, if they're even okay.

so yuwol decides to focus on gathering all the items that have fallen out instead, putting them back into his bag. still, insu starts off the conversation regardless, something that yuwol hadn't expected in the slightest. it'd be rude to ignore it, right? it's not like he wants to act like insu doesn't exist, when insu had been an important part of his life for a while. "how i've been..?" horrible, yuwol wants to say, but insu doesn't need to know that. but with the eyebags under his eyes, his sunken demeanor, the slump on his shoulders—insu can probably tell. "i'm... okay," he lies.

call it whatever you want but insu had known yuwol long enough to know how the other felt even without him having to verbally tell him. so, when the other male answers him, insu is able to tell right away that yuwol is straight out lying to him and despite telling himself inside that he doesn't care, well he still can't stop himself from speaking before the words that come out next just end up flowing out without warning. "you're lying. you're not okay"

his own words startle even himself as he says them, standing and handing yuwol what he had managed to gather, his expression serious as he stares at the other as if he's carefully watching him and his expressions. why did it matter to him? it didn't. absolutely not, there's no way that someone like insu would really care about how someone else felt ( the lies he's telling himself now continue even as he stands there ). "how have you really been?" honestly his tone almost sounds like it had back then, back when they first started 'dating', before insu got in his own nonchalant and uncaring ways. it almost sounds as if he's being soft towards yuwol in that moment.

"and i already told you, i did have to." as he says this he shoves his hands into his jacket pockets, gaze still stuck on the male in front of him for a few moments before glancing around. this definitely wasn't the place to be talking, not when it was getting more crowded by the second and people were becoming louder due to the excitement of the activities going on.

but he thinks this is a nice opportunity wander around, look at the decorations and stock up on some candy ( that’s his main motive anyway, nothing else ).

that’s mostly what’s filling his basket right now, a few halloween-themed chocolate bars and candies, along with a pumpkin he thinks he can put up in his room. it’s rather barren and lifeless at home, a splotch of orange might make it seem a bit more lively. even though he hasn’t felt that spark of life since being dragged back to his parents, forced to stay in a makeshift prison he calls his family home. but that’s neither here or there.

at first, yuwol doesn’t think about the fear factor of halloween—but perhaps, these hauntings can come in different forms. today, it comes in the form of someone from his past, someone he thinks doesn’t want anything to do with him. how funny, that the world can just drop insu onto him suddenly when he’s woefully unprepared. when they crashed into one another, a bunch of yuwol’s recently purchased items fall out of his basket, pathetically scattering about.

so yuwol has an excuse to look down on the floor, instead of at insu. even though insu’s voice is enough to make him shudder a little, memories of their arguments and fights creeping up at him.

“ah, sorry… for bumping into you,” yuwol starts, eyes still looking at the floor, fixated. eventually, he crouches down, trying to gather everything that fell out back into his basket. “i can take care of this, so… it’s okay. you can go… sorry.”

he honestly doesn't understand why he's even like this, why he's so keen on avoiding yuwol yet wanting to help him at the same time, though he guesses that's just how their 'relationship' is, or rather was at some point.

insu was never one that ever cared about someone else's feelings before, much less helping them unless it benefitted him in some way, though when it came to the other male in front of him it felt as if he couldn't resist the urge to just be in the other's presence. why? even he wasn't sure about that, though he figures that it has something to do with their shared history (even if it were pretty much short-term) with one another.

"no, it's my fault for not paying attention so it's only right that i help..." the words seem to just come out on their own, even before insu can fully process or even think about what to say in response to what yuwol had told him just moments before. even as he's there helping pick up the items from the floor, he can't help but occasionally glance up at the other male every now and then, only looking down at where he's reaching when it's time for him to pick something else up.

there's that voice inside his head that tells him he should have just taken the chance to book it, that he could have avoided any confrontation that may come their way once they were standing face-to-face again, though it's not like he could avoid the other forever. hell, insu didn't have a reason to really avoid yuwol, yet here they were awkwardly picking up the contents that were sent flying to the floor during their literal run in with one another.