残念ですが、さようなら

Okay party, I've called this meeting because I want to make sure there's a contingency plan for if the Evil Sorceress tempts me and I betray you. I'm just noticing that we have a witch, magus, and cleric in this party while I am spec'd heavily into anti-magic, on account of the Evil Sorceress situation, so I really don't like our odds if I'm the one that gets seduced. Just something to take into account before we enter this fortress with a purple-pink color motif and abundant rose bushes. I'm not saying it WILL happen, I just know myself well enough to admit that my Sacred Oath as a crusader won't hold up for a second if I'm offered so much as a crumb of villainess pussy.

For the love of GOD turn the volume on

every day someone thinks of an art form no one did before

@l1zardl1ps 😭

omg. your favorite piece of fiction is so crazy fucked and serious with its unapologetic and raw depictions of how abuse functions. like it’s so perverse with it too, which is so interesting and transgressive. and i’m pretty sure the perversity is a self-aware meta thing, meaning it’s ultimately clean which is a relief. it would be a serious problem if you were at all titillated by the crazy perverted abuse story. at best you’d be a moron and at worst a predator. those other fans are freaks and pervs in the bad way but not you… not you. you’re doing a great job at ethics and avoiding punishment

Canadian bilingual packaging is fun because you get to see how various slightly odd idioms end up being translated by people who don't give a shit. I just saw a tub of double chocolate chip ice cream where the English label says "death by chocolate", but the French translates literally as "chocolate until death", which has a somewhat different vibe.

I will figure out your body’s resonant frequency and play a drum solo that will dissolve you

Anyways maybe I've said this before but the more accurate and useful version of what "do you have any hobbies outside of media consumption" is ostensibly supposed to be communicating is something like "do you have any hobbies that are active (physically, mentally, emotionally) and/or generative in some way? Are you actually engaged with the things you do in your free/leisure time or do you let them just passively happen to you?", but unfortunately none of that is as pithy or smug as "do you have any hobbies outside of media consumption" nor does it allow you to bully people for having harmless interests you happen to think are lame but with a thin layer of plausible deniability that prevents people from telling you what an asshole you're being. Also it's really long. So you know it'll probably never take off in the same way the other thing has.