Winslow @ink-and-bleach - Tumblr Blog

Literally everyone must find me irresistibly beautiful or I will combust, you don’t understand

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I’m doing better.

It’s been a long time since I’ve posted. I keep this account as a tool for not forgetting the things that happened to me, and a resource for therapy. I want you guys to know that I’m alive and ok.

My relationship with food isn’t perfect but I’m able to enjoy eating again. I love food. I love cooking, I love making dinner for myself and Mitya, I love trying new foods when we travel and experiencing culture. When I eat something I don’t feel anxious about it. I don’t think about my body every second of the day.

I got ketamine therapy, and diagnosed with autism. Kind of embarrassing but it’s changed my life so much. The ketamine made my life-long depression go into remission. I do art again. I learned to crochet and I’m really good at it.

Mitya and I got engaged in Bled, Slovenia. We’ve been to 6 countries and will be going to the 7th (Lisbon, Portugal) in a month.

The rats passed away. So did Mitya’s cats. All from old age related illnesses. I feel a little bit traumatized medically from it all but I’m working through it at work.

I work at an animal shelter. Animal behavior and medicine is my special interest. I’m hoping to be trained in a shelter vet-tech. If I like the role I think I’m going to try and go to school for the certification.

My sister fully came out as my sister. I’m really happy for her and glad to not be the only trans person in the family anymore.

Things are a lot better now. I haven’t spoken to Dan in over 4 years. I still see him occasionally because I can’t avoid it with him being my siblings biological father but I’m able to start to heal from all of it.

I can’t reach out I can’t tell anyone what’s happening no one knows how it bad it is I want to kill myself so bad

Please help me I’m so scared I’ve never been this low before

Why is getting mental health help so hard I’m going to kill myself before I can get help

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I had a horrible day

New lw

I don’t even really care

This isn’t about being pretty anymore is it

New LW for this round, 130.8

I feel euphoric and consumed

New lw for this relapse, 134

My hair falling out so bad but my stomach is looking better

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I got a new job and with that I’ve had some pretty extreme anxiety where I’m losing my appetite. I can’t eat in the morning, I try really hard to but I can’t force myself to. I put a few honey roasted peanuts (one of my favorites) in my mouth the other morning and I had to consciously try not to gag. So I get to work and I feel like shit and I’m starving. And I work for 4-5 hours and then I get 15 minutes to eat and then it’s back into the dog pen where of course I’m not going to bring my human food. So your boy isn’t really eating much until after work and by then I’m overstimulated and still anxious so appetite is low. My body feels like shit and I think I’m going to get some meal replacement shakes.

The job is really fun, I’m a dog daycare attendant so I get to play with them all day and teach tricks and I’m learning a ton about behavior science and body language. I love this job and I doubt I’ll feel anxious for long. But oof I’m losing weight and it feels good and it feels horrible

ink-and-bleach

My resume looks good but like what if it was honest

-commits time clock fraud

- smokes weed literally every single day right outside the building on my break

- has stolen likely $1000 worth of merchandise at this point

ink-and-bleach

My silk robe rack ❤️ 18 out of 20 are stolen

My resume looks good but like what if it was honest

-commits time clock fraud

- smokes weed literally every single day right outside the building on my break

- has stolen likely $1000 worth of merchandise at this point

139 139 I’m at a new lw for this relapse let’s goooooo I’m so ready to get through the 130s now

Why am I so miserable

It’s never going to get better what’s the point in trying

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

I need to eat something. I don’t know if I will.

aahsoup

"dm me pictures and I'll help you reach your goal w-"

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