Incorrect Habs Quotes @incorrecthabsquotes - Tumblr Blog

Shea Weber: The Montreal Canadiens select Cole Caufield.

Brendan Gallagher: MY SON!

#habs #montreal canadiens #incorrect quotes #brendan gallagher #shea weber #cole caufield #congrats new baby hab!

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Jonathan Drouin: So I told him to take his apologies and shove them right up his a--

Shea Weber: ALRIGHT STOP

[Covering KK's ears]

Shea Weber: Okay, Jo, you can continue.

#habs #montreal canadiens #incorrect quotes #shea weber #jonathan drouin #jesperi kotkaniemi #source: twitter

Carey Price: So how was everyone's trade deadline day?

Max Domi: Gally got super drunk and tried setting his contract on fire.

Max Domi: He said "Good luck trading me without a receipt!"

#habs #montreal canadiens #incorrect quotes #brendan gallagher #carey price #max domi #source: twitter #have i been dead or does school suck?#who's to say

Claude Julien, talking about the Bruins first goal: And where were you?

David Schlemko: I was over on the bench.

Claude Julien: And what did you do?

David Schlemko: Nothing. I was over on the bench.

Claude Julien: But you saw what happened?

David Schlemko: Yeah. Cause I was over on the bench.

Claude Julien: So you saw what happened and you did nothing?

David Schlemko: Cause I was over on the bench.

#habs #montreal canadiens #incorrect quotes #claude julien #david schlemko #source: john mulaney #book it: November 24th 2018

Carey Price: I can't take this anymore, somebody take me out.

Shea Weber: In the date kind of way or like an assassination?

Carey Price: I don't care, surprise me.

#habs #montreal canadiens #incorrect quotes #carey price #shea weber #source: unknown

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Jesperi Kotkaniemi: Webs, I hope to be half the man you are someday.

Shea Weber: You're gonna have to up your protein intake quite a bit, maybe start doing some squats-oh, you meant that metaphorically.

#habs #montreal canadiens #incorrect quotes #jesperi kotkaniemi #shea weber #source: crazy ex girlfriend

Brendan Gallagher: *gazing out a window.*

Max Domi: Do you think he's depressed?

Jonathan Drouin: He might just be thinking about life.

Max Domi: What if he's sad?

Jonathan Drouin: Maybe he's planning what to do tomorrow.

Brendan Gallagher: *humming Wii music*

#habs #montreal canadiens #incorrect quotes #brendan gallagher #jonathan drouin #max domi #source: twitter

I believe in hate at first sight.

Brendan Gallagher, upon meeting any new member of the Bruins.

#habs #montreal canadiens #incorrect quotes #brendan gallagher #source: someecards

MY SON HAS HIS FIRST GOAL

#habs #montreal canadiens #jesperi kotkaniemi

[Police siren wailing in the distance].

Jesperi Kotkaniemi, who has never done anything wrong in his life: Oh no, they found me.

#habs #montreal canadiens #incorrect quotes #source: tumblr #jesperi kotkaniemi

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We started chanting, McDonald's! McDonald's! McDonald's! And Webs pulled into the drive thru, and we started cheering, and then he ordered one black coffee for himself and kept driving.

Kotkaniemi discussing the time the kids on the team carpooled in to practice with their dad.

#habs #montreal canadiens #incorrect quotes #source: john mulaney #shea weber #jesperi kotkaniemi #victor mete #noah juulsen #artturi lehkonen #all the youngins on the team #habs insta calling Webs 'dad' killed me

Ahhhh!!!! Thank you so much to every single person who follows me. I can't believe I hit 1000!!!

Jesperi Kotkaniemi: *Putting a lightsaber, a princess crown, and goldfish crackers in his hockey bag*

Jonathan Drouin: Where are you going?

Jesperi Kotkaniemi: To war.

#habs #montreal canadiens #incorrect quotes #source: twitter #jesperi kotkaniemi #jonathan drouin

Victor Mete [texting]: You don't have to sign your name on texts.

Shea Weber [texting]: Dear Victor, suggestion noted. Sincerely, Shea Weber.

#habs #montreal canadiens #incorrect quotes #shea weber #victor mete #source: brooklyn nine nine

Brendan Gallagher: So, how'd you convince all of them to betray me? What'd you offer them?

Carey Price: I ask them if they wanted to embarrass you and they instantly said yes.

#habs #montreal canadiens #incorrect quotes #brendan gallagher #carey price #source: brooklyn nine nine

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Me watching Kotkaniemi play:

#habs #montreal canadiens #jesperi kotkaniemi #my son!

Brendan Gallagher: Momma didn't raise a quitter, but she DID raise a fool, and it turns out those two things are a terrible combination.

#habs #montreal canadiens #incorrect quotes #brendan gallagher #source: tumblr #this is so accurate

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