Incorrect Devils Quotes

Cody Glass, in conversation with the other trade deadline additions: What's your most controversial video game hot take? Brian Dumoulin: The pursuit for photorealism in games is a fruitless endeavor that only results in bloated file sizes that take too much space. Daniel Sprong: Mario is a woman and just really butch.

Jesper Bratt: What do you think Haula will do for a distraction? Ondrej Palat: He'll probably, like, make a noise or throw a rock. That's what I would do. [Building explodes; several car alarms go off] Pally: ...Or he could do that.

Dawson Mercer: Here comes the lightning! Dawson, whispering: You've got to imagine it coming out my fingertips, wherein I am an almighty wizard. Luke Hughes, brow furrowed: Okay, currently imagining that. Hmm, not bad. Not bad at all.

Jack Hughes: Look, I know we don't always see eye to eye but - Luke Hughes: That's because you're too short to do so. Jack: ...Listen here you fucking -

Timo Meier: Snow got me feeling some type of way. Dawson Mercer: That's hypothermia. Timo: Damn, the paramedics told me it was the magic of Christmas.

Erik Haula, filling out league paperwork: Were you guys born AMAB or AFAB? Dougie Hamilton: Bold of you to assume I was born at all. Jesper Bratt: I personally was created in a lab. Johnathan Kovacevic: I just straight up spawned lol.

Nico Hischier: Are you sure Timo's going to be able to handle that IKEA furniture? He's not very good with technical stuff… Jesper Bratt: Why are you worried? IKEA was never complicated; these days, it's even easier! Everything's color coded, numbered, and there’s even an assembly robot option to make it even easier for Timo, which we've obviously opted in for. All he needs to do is press the clearly labeled ON button, scan the QR code on the front of the box, and it'll take care of the rest. Even a monkey could do it! [Bratt's phone rings] Timo Meier: Hey, so I'm at Lowe's... Nico: Nico: I should have gone with the monkey.

Dougie Hamilton: It's just that lollipop sticks last longer than the head, even if they’re less flavorful. I'm thinking of paper sticks, because you can peel off the layers with your teeth or leave it there until they fall off naturally, but plastic sticks can be chewed on too or left sticking out like a cigarette. Paper straws can be eaten layer by layer over time though, so they have the edge. Luke Hughes, bored: Can't we just leave while he's distracted? Dawson Mercer, genuinely interested: But what about wooden sticks? Luke: I hate you.

Kurtis MacDermid: Even Pally and I have been getting closer. The other day, he gave me half of his sandwich! Ondrej Palat, deadpan: I mistook him for a garbage can.

Jesper Bratt: You know, sometimes I really think I can be too straight. Timo Meier, covered in bi merch and sipping an iced coffee: Sucks to be you.

Johnathan Kovacevic, after the Lightning game: Hey! Wanna hear a joke? Jake Allen: Sure. Kovy: Your life! Jake: Actually, my life isn't a joke, jokes have meaning. Kovy: Jake, no...

Luke Hughes: Did you miss me while I was gone? Dawson Mercer: You were gone?

Paul Cotter: Small creatures are much more vicious because they have a smaller body to bottle up all their emotions. Johnathan Kovacevic: Ridiculous. Give me some examples. Simon Nemec: Wasps? Dawson Mercer: Terriers? Jesper Bratt: Jack.

Dougie Hamilton, looking at the Sabres offense: Hey Dillon, I've got an idea for how to solve this. Brenden Dillon, pulling out a shotgun: Yeah? Dougie: Wh- No! That’s not the idea, Dillon!

Seamus Casey, wearing shades: Rule one of destroying the world. Shea, doing finger guns at the camera: You gotta look good while doing it.

Dawson Mercer: Why aren't you sleeping? Luke Hughes, annoyed: I'm too busy plotting your murder to sleep, Dawson. Dawson: Luke, sighing: ...The nightmares. Dawson, scooting in closer and wrapping his arms around Luke: Aww, sweetie...

Jack Hughes: How do tall people people possibly sleep at night when the blanket can't possibly cover them? Dougie Hamilton: Jack, it's four o'clock in the morning. Jack: So, you can't sleep, huh? Jack, smirking: Is it because of the blanket?