Incorrect Cubs Quotes @incorrectchicagocubsquotes-blog - Tumblr Blog

Tim Buss: What's your workout routine?

Jon Lester: Does running out of fucks to give count as cardio?

#chicago cubs #tim buss #jon lester #source: the internet

•18+ Adults Only

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Justin Wilson: I won't let you down.

Anthony Rizzo: I think you will. I think this entire project of yours is stupid and doomed to fail.

#source: the good place #justin wilson #anthony rizzo #chicago cubs

John Lackey: This is exhausting. I just want to go back to my container of goo and go to sleep.

#source: the good place #john lackey #former chicago cubs

Anthony Rizzo: Thanks, Dad... Why is everyone staring at me?

Kris Bryant: You just called Grandpa Rossy dad; you said thanks, dad.

Anthony Rizzo: What? No, I didn't. I said thanks, man.

David Ross: Do you see me as a father figure, Rizz?

Anthony Rizzo: No, if anything, I see you as a bother figure, 'cause you're always bothering me.

#source: b99 #anthony rizzo #kris bryant #david ross #chicago cubs #former chicago cubs

Kyle Schwarber: Whoa, he’s being a little…

Kyle Hendricks: Obstreperous? Recalcitrant? Truculent?

Kyle Schwarber: I was gonna say “cray-cray”.

#chicago cubs #kyle schwarber #kyle hendricks #source: modern family

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Javy Baez: The Cardinals are the enemy. The first enemy and the last.

#chicago cubs #javy baez #source: game of thrones

Kyle Schwarber: I will put my “A” down to make “A.”

Javy Baez: I will add to your “A” to make “AT.”

Anthony Rizzo: I will add onto your “AT” to make “RAT.”

Kyle Hendricks: I will add onto your “RAT” to make “BIOSTRATIGRAPHIC.”

Anthony Rizzo: [flips the board]

#chicago cubs #kyle schwarber #javy baez #javier baez #anthony rizzo #kyle hendricks #source: the suite life on deck

Javy Báez: Ooh, I've never had to walk before, this is fun! [Walks a few steps] Now I'm bored. Walking is dumb.

#source: the good place #javy baez #chicago cubs

Tommy La Stella: Ladies and gentlemen, when you look at this power-hitting couple, it's no wonder they're a household name all over the world like... bacon and eggs. Bryant and Rizzo!

#chicago cubs #tommy la stella #kris bryant #anthony rizzo #source: singin in the rain

*Joe Maddon tries to remove Kyle Hendricks from a game, Willson Contreras continues discussing the next batter with him*

Joe Maddon: The manager has made a decision.

Willson Contreras: I recognize that the manager has made a decision, but given that it is a stupid-ass decision, I have elected to ignore it.

#chicago cubs #joe maddon #willson contreras #source: the avengers

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Brandon Kintzler: I wasn't a failed pitcher. I was pre-successful.

#source: the good place #brandon kintzler #chicago cubs

CJ Edwards: I keep trying to make protein shakes but they keep turning out as margaritas idk

#chicago cubs #cj edwards #carl edwards jr #source: twitter

Tommy La Stella: Great. Now you've gotten me kicked out of a funeral. Just add it to the list. Kicked out of Petsmart, kicked out of Santa's Village, kicked out of the Salvation Army...

Anthony Rizzo: Dishonorably discharged!

#chicago cubs #tommy la stella #anthony rizzo #source: psych

Jake Arrieta: Hold that thought. Is it okay if I go work out? I love working out. I gotta stay jacked. It's who I am.

#source: the good place #jake arrieta #former chicago cubs

*heading to Milwaukee*

Ian Happ: I can't go, stress is bad for the baby

Anthony Rizzo: What baby?

Ian Happ: Me.

#source: twitter #chicago cubs #ian happ #anthony rizzo

•18+ Adults Only

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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Anthony Rizzo: There are always lessons in failures.

Javy Baez: Is that why you lost 101 games a few years ago?

#chicago cubs #anthony rizzo #javy baez #source: game of thrones

Chris Gimenez: You guys came to say goodbye because you're my friends.

Anthony Rizzo: Well, I suppose some part of me possibly has a sense of casual kinship with you, much as one might be fond of a street cat.

#source: the good place #chris gimenez #anthony rizzo

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