incorrect bundesliga quotes @incorrectbundesligaquotes - Tumblr Blog

Alex: Do I look straight?

Nikki: Not in the slightest.

Alex: I meant my parking job.

Nikki: Oh, yeah, you’re good.

#incorrectbundesligaquotes #schalke 04 #alex nübel #fc bayern munich #niklas süle #nüle #source: i can’t remember tbh

•18+ Adults Only

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Mats: Well, whats your ideal date?

Marco: Watching you get hit by a bus.

#incorrectbundesligaquotes #borussia dortmund #mats hummels #marco reus #source: i don’t know oops

Julian: I'm sending good vibes your way. They're coming. There's nothing you can do to stop them.

Kai: That’s the most threatening way I’ve ever been cheered up.

#incorrectbundesligaquotes #borussia dortmund #bayer 04 leverkusen #julian brandt #kai havertz #bravertz #source: tumblr

Mats: Would you rather marry Manu or-

Thomas: Marry Manu.

Mats: Wait, you didn’t hear the second part-

Thomas: Your point?

#incorrectbundesligaquotes #fc bayern munich #borussia dortmund #mats hummels #thomas müller #source: can’t remember oops

Mats: I just decided I don’t like you.

Marco: I just decided I don’t care.

#incorrectbundesligaquotes #mats hummels #marco reus #borussia dortmund #source: unknown

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Jadon: Hey, Marco... why do you do this game? What’s it all for?

Marco: In a word?

Marco: Chaos

#incorrectbundesligaquotes #borussia dortmund #jadon sancho #marco reus #source: snl

Joshua: I think Leon is in trouble!

Serge: Alright. Struggling to give a fuck, if I’m honest.

#incorrectbundesligaquotes #fc bayern munich #joshua kimmich #serge gnabry #source: derry girls

Mats: I feel like I have died and gone to Heaven.

Marco: I have that dream too, but you go in the other direction.

#incorrectbundesligaquotes #fc bayern munich #borussia dortmund #mats hummels #marco reus #source: the nanny

Marco: Mario and I don’t have pet names for each other.

Julian: Uh huh. Marco, what do bees make?

Marco: Honey

Mario, from the other room: Yes, baby?

#incorrectbundesligaquotes #borussia dortmund #marco reus #julian weigl #mario götze #source: twitter

Mats: I never brag.

Thomas: You once called your face proof of God’s existence.

#incorrectbundesligaquotes #mats hummels #thomas müller #fc bayern munich #source: desperate housewives

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Julian: Why were these hot chocolates in the oven, you could’ve burned the house down!

Kai: You asked for hot chocolate!

Julian: KAI, I SWEAR TO-

#incorrectbundesligaquotes #julian brandt #kai havertz #bravertz #bayer 04 leverkusen #source: youtube

Joshua: How dumb does Mats think we are?

Leon: Sometimes he leaves me pictures of food instead of a shopping list.

#incorrectbundesligaquotes #fc bayern munich #joshua kimmich #leon goretzka #source: modern family

Mats: *has a black eye*

Thomas: *walks over and sees Mats* holy crap! What happened to you?!

Mats: I was admiring myself in the bathroom mirror when some jackass snuck up behind me and hit the back of my head! I hit my eye right on the counter!

Thomas: Wait, how’d they sneak up on you in a mirror?

Mats: I was too distracted by my beautiful face...

#incorrectbundesligaquotes #mats hummels #thomas müller #fc bayern munich #source: unknown

I wanted to make fun of stupid people while I get drunk. My two passions.

Manuel Neuer, probably.

#incorrectbundesligaquotes #manuel neuer #fc bayern munich #source: parks and rec

Jadon: Good morning.

Mario: Good morning.

Roman: Good morning.

Marcel: You all sound like robots, try spicing it up a bit.

Marco: MORNING MOTHERFUCKERS!

#incorrectbundesligaquotes #jadon sancho #mario götze #roman burki #marcel schmelzer #marco reus #borussia dortmund #bvb09 #source: unknown

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Mats: See? See, one day you’re gonna look back on this and laugh.

Marco: I assure you, for the rest of my life, every time I look back on this I will personally drive over to your house and smack you.

#incorrectbundesligaquotes #mats hummels #marco reus #fc bayern munich #borussia dortmund #bvb09 #in honor of the halftime score in der klassiker #source: phineas and ferb

Mats: Remember when I was being a bitch with you and you asked me why I was acting like that and I just screamed “CAUSE YOU’RE SO FUCKING ANNOYING?!”

Thomas: You need to be more specific, that happens all the time.

#incorrectbundesligaquotes #mats hummels #thomas müller #fc bayern munich #source: tumblr

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