What Do You Mean It Isn't True? Of Course It Is!!!

Iris: Hi~!

Nyx: Yo

Cor: Brat

Prompto: Hey, Noct!

Noctis: No, no, not you, you're not an idiot

Prompto: No, no, no. You went too far about seven hours ago. Now you're going to prison.

Noctis: Dad'll be happy.

Prompto: You're like 15 years old

Prompto: Only if you also don't ask why

Prompto: *Pulls out 7 pristine human skulls* Take your pick.

Noctis:

Prompto:

Noctis: Prompto is flawless.

Ignis: I hear their smile's insured for 500,000$

Gladio: I hear he does modeling... in Altissia.

Noctis: One time he LOOKED at me...

Noctis:

Prompto: If I had a dollar for every pixel in this image, I’d have 15 cents

Noctis: If I had a dollar for every ounce of rage I felt in my body after I read this text, I would have enough money to buy a cannon to fire at you

Gladio: Actually I did the math, Prompto would have $225, not $0.15.

Prompto: Fam I’m right here....

Ignis: If I had a dollar I would buy a can of soda :)

Noctis: while you’re there could you buy me an apply juice please?

Ignis: Sorry I only have a dollar

Noctis: :(

Cor: Hey he's right, Prompto would have $22,500 because it's a dollar for every pixel, not a cent

Ignis: If I had $22,500 I would buy a can of soda and an apply juice

Cor: You can buy anything you want with $22,500

Regis: Yeah and they want soda and apply juice

Cor: Apply juice to what

Gladio: Directly to the forehead

Noctis: Hey.

Gladio : Hi.

Ignis: Hello.

Iris: Hey!

Prompto: I gave you the key to my place for emergencies only.

Prompto: Road: works ahead

Iris: BBQ sauce: on my titties

Ignis: Shavacado: fre

Gladio : Miss Keisha: fuckin dead

Prompto: Ohhhh, we each get our own oven?

Noctis: ... N-No...

Noctis, laughing: How many ovens do you think I have???

Prompto, motioning to their kitchen: Three, I thought!

Ignis: I see a-

Noctis, motioning to one device: This is a microwave.

Prompto: Oh, well I-

Noctis: Hey wait wait, actually- hang on- *fiddles with the buttons on the microwave*

Noctis, amazed: Its got a bake setting!

Gladio : Ohoho, you learn something new every day!

Prompto : Do we- Do we roshambo for who gets to pick first?

Noctis: Now I've just discovered I have more ovens than I thought, we don't have to roshambo nothin!

Noctis: I am someone who owns four ovens...

Noctis, louder and way too happy: I am someone... who owns FOUR OVENS...

Noctis: I didn't know I was so rich with ovens...

Gladio, pointing to another appliance: Also the toaster oven!

Noctis:

Prompto: Ohhh, toasty boy! Four- Five ovens!

Noctis:

Noctis, fucking ECSTATIC: I AM SOMEONE WHO OWNS FIVE OVENS

Prompto: Mmmmm...Nope! absolutely not.

Cor: I hope it sucks, whatever you're going through.

Ignis: I hope it emotionally scars you for the rest of your life.

Regis: I hope you reach out to me so I can ignore you like the loving father that I am.

Clarus: I can't wait to go to your funeral, knowing I could've changed that outcome.

Noctis:

Prompto: Leave it to me!

Prompto: Centaurs have six limbs and are therefore insects. Discuss.

Clarus, Ignis, and Regis: *Immediately begin arguing*

Aranea: Uh...I can explain?

Nyx: How can you still say that?

Prompto: To pet all the dogs.

Gladio: No, fitness goals.