a cygnet of stars or a delusional ugly duckling?

So I fake another smile, and blink away the tears. I’m supposed to be strong, I’m supposed to have no fears but the tears just keep rolling. It’s so hard not to drown. I’m such a strong person. Why am I breaking down?

you are allowed to terminate toxic relationships

you know what i love

There must be a difference between your forever and mine

*cringes at 9 year old me*

when someone with anxiety asks ‘do you love me?’ ‘are you sure?’ don’t get angry.  we’re trying hard, but sometimes we need reassurance.  we feel like no one likes us sometimes. deep down, we know it’s silly.  but that doesn’t stop us. we’re still learning. be patient.

“I want the bear hug kind of hug where he has both arms wrapped around your shoulders and you have two arms wrapped around his waist. I want sick-of-breathing, weightless kisses that make you wonder if you’re awake or asleep, and hasty, misplaced mouths that aim for lips and miss. I want messy hair all over the place, and whispering that says, “this is good, this is real, and this is it.” I want the grounded kind of love that sends a text captioned “this made me think of you,” when you’re having a bad day. I want to be asked to dance in the middle of the street when there isn’t a soul in sight, and to lie on a riverbank and dream. I want a quiet, comfortable silence that settles around you like a warm foam bath, and late night conversations that make you think about the bigger things. And I want life, so much that I might drown in it, and fire and falling asleep to soft, gentle laughter. I want more. For once I want to feel full full full, instead of so goddamn empty all the time.”