I Never Was

imnotangelvasquez:

“Look, nobody’s perfect Angel. We all go through rough patches and do things we might not be proud of, but we learn from our mistakes. Take me out sometime though? Like, on a date or something?” Joni raised one of her dark eyebrows in curiosity, as she took another long hit from the blunt. 

“Guess that’s true.” Angel replied, offering her a smile as he crossed his arms over his chest. “I mean... not a date, since I guess we’re not dating anymore but I mean... We kinda do break the rules of not dating a bit so why not?” He offered. “Let me do something right.” 

imnotangelvasquez:

“I miss you too, Angel.” She replied simply, biting the inside of her lip nervously as she kept the conversation with the boy going. “I just needed some time and space apart from you, I’m sorry. Things just haven’t been the greatest at my house and I needed to focus on that. Stuff is getting better though, and I’m not apposed to the idea is being on better terms with you.” She admitted. “No, no. Please don’t feel obligated to give me money, we’re fine.”

Angel looked at her for a moment, frowning as he realized he was probably speaking out of line. “I get it, I mean, I’m... I know I’m kinda a...” Junkie. Addict. Lost Cause. “I’m a handful sometimes and... but you know it’s not like I ever wanted to be too much for you. I can take care of myself, and I have been.” That was a lie. Taking another hit from the blunt he held his breath as he held it out to her again. “I’m just sayin’ like... even you let... me like, take you out sometime, buy you something nice.”

imnotangelvasquez

“Great. I need to complain about the end of  Scooby Doo. The new TV show, not the classics. I mean, it just ended, there was no warning, no wrap up episode where everything was tied together. How has the creative team lived with themselves after leaving us with this unsatisfying end!”

“Yo wait they ended that? Shit, well was it like cancelled because when a show gets cancelled it can like stop short sometime. What like... plot did they have to wrap up I’m pretty sure Scooby Doo’s a same shit different day kinda show.”

imnotangelvasquez:

“Of course they don’t, no matter what happens between us there’s always going to be this certain level of a connection between us.” She admitted to the boy as she offered the blunt back to him. “Thanks, money seems to only getting tighter and tighter with my family, which is never fun. But, I’ve been picking up extra shifts at the diner to help out with everything.”

“Yeah uh...” He took the blunt from her, taking a quick hit and looking upwards towards the sky as he exhaled. “Hey I... I miss you a lot, you know?” He pointed out, knowing it probably wasn’t what she wanted to hear but, he wasn’t going to let her forget it. He’d fucked up the relationship, and he knew it now. “You know if you like need some help, I don’t have much but... I’ll get some money coming in sometime soon... If I can help you know I will.”

imnotangelvasquez:

“Yeah, that’s true. Obviously we still like each other on a certain level if we’ve been fraternizing with one another at my house on a pretty regular basis.” She let out another laugh as she took another hit from the blunt. “I’ve been alright, things at home have been pretty crazy but I’m keeping my head afloat.”

“I mean... you know those feelings don’t go away, right?” Angel pointed out, though he knew if he spoke like this he would come off as wanting to get back together with her. That wasn’t what he wanted entirely. He simply didn’t want to let her go. “That’s good uh, I hope that you like, stay afloat and all that...” He coughed. 

imnotangelvasquez :

‘‘true true.’‘ theo stepped back with Angel. Resting his cup down on the grass before turning his attention to Angel. Moving closer, attempting to be discreet as possible. He grabbed a joint. ‘’thanks…..you got a light?’’ .

“Do I got a light he asks.” Angel repeated with a scoff, digging in his pant pockets for a second to pull out a little green lighter and lit it up, holding it for the other boy. “I got you, man.” He told him. 

imnotangelvasquez:

“Exactly, plus here you have better access to drugs and booze.” She admitted as she took the blunt from the boy, taking a long hit from it. “I appreciate the fact that you enjoy my company, even if we haven’t sat down and talked for quite sometime. How have you been…?”

“Yeah well, that’s certainly the best reason to be here, but it’s feelin’ kinda dull like, people losing their shit over a few beers, calm down.” He shook his head and stood next to her, bumping his shoulder into hers when she commented on his enjoying her company. “You know just cause we broke up, it doesn’t mean I don’t like you I mean, we were together for a reason.” He exhaled roughly and shook his head. “I’ve been great, you know, the usual.” He was miserable, but that had been his baseline as of late, he thrived in his own misery. 

imnotangelvasquez:

“Well, it looks like you’ve already found something to keep you busy,” she looked over at the blunt between his fingers. “If you’re looking for some company, I don’t think it’s horrible to share a blunt with your ex.” she let out a chuckle.“I don’t know, I wasn’t even going to come in the first place but I changed my mind at the last minute.” She shrugged her shoulders. 

“Yeah well, it was either smoke here or smoke at home and I feel like if I smoke here at least I get to say I was social.” Or he could find somebody with better drugs and get more high than he already was. “Yeah, well I think that sounds like a great idea.” He told the girl, lips forming a small smile. “Yeah well, at least with you here that means there’s someone here to talk to, this place is lame.” He shrugged, taking a hit from the blunt and holding it over to her to take it. 

imnotangelvasquez :

‘‘Right?’‘ theo said excitedly. taking a long swig of his drink. his drunken grin widened a little when the other guy made him an offer on weed. nodding as he quickly thought about it. ‘’yeah that’d be cool man’’

“There is no reason to come to these things ‘cept to get shitfaced.” Stepping backwards towards the edge of the crowd Angel reached into the pocket of his jacket to pull out a plastic bag where he’d brought a couple wrapped up joints as well as some other paraphernalia just in case somebody had something better. “Here, pick one.” He held the bag out discretely.