ImaginesByEm

I take in a deep breath and smile. Six long years later, and I was finally back in California. Although I was extremely excited to see all my old friends again, the pit in my stomach seemed to grow heavier every minute I thought about it. As I wait for my Uber to arrive, I decide to send Lydia a text. 

‘Hey Lydia, its (Y/N). I know its been some time, but Jackson gave me your new number from when he was down a year or two ago. I just arrived back in California and I’m heading to Beacon Hills now! If you were up for it, I’d love to grab some dinner and catch up? :) xx’

I sucked in as much air as I could before pressing send, as if it would lessen my stress somehow. Upon seeing my uber was arriving, I huffed it back out in relief. I really did need to sit down.

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“Thanks again! Have a good day.” I say before closing the car door. I look back at my phone and smile. The last 20 minutes Lydia and I had been texting non-stop as if we never stopped all those years ago. We were never the closest of friends, but from what Jackson said, she really learnt to let go of her worries and insecurities and became such a loving and caring friend to everyone. I didn’t believe it when Jackson had first told me, but he reminded me that just like he had, people grow. 

I looked up and was met with the view of my nan’s old house. I mustered a smile at the memories of her looking after me after my parents passed away. Leaving her was so hard, but she made me realise it was what needed to be done. If it wasn’t for her, I probably would still be going in and out of conscious control.

Just got confirmed for dinner tonight at The Hub for 6PM! Send me your details and I’ll come grab you! Wear something cute! Xx

I looked up at the time and saw that it was already 4PM. Shit. I quickly dragged my suitcase to the front door and grabbed the key from the lockbox. Stepping inside, I was overwhelmed with emotion. All of the old furniture was here. But everything else was emptied out and boxed up, placed by the garage door. Nan knew she was sick, and she insisted that she wanted to make sure I didn’t have to go through the pain of clearing out the house when it was time for me to return. I wheeled in my suitcase and plonked down on the couch, seeing a piece of paper sitting on the bare coffee table. 

My Dear (Y/N),

I know life has not been easy on you, but I want you to know I am so proud of you. Your passion and determination is unmatched, and it is no surprise that you are so special. Your stories and photos have inspired me and made me feel great comfort in these last few months, and I hope you use everything you have learnt to make others feel the same. Please, don’t be afraid coming back to Beacon Hills. It may be the same town, but you are a different girl. A much more capable one at that. And even with all that said, a girl still needs someone there to pick her back up when things get tough. And I know how you must be feeling right now. So please, for my sake, keep yourself open and honest. I’ll always be by your side in spirit.

Love always,

Nan xoxoxo

I wiped the flowing tears from my face as I placed the letter back on the table. “Why couldn’t I see you just one last time. It’s not fair.” I sniffle, standing back up. I open up my suitcase and grab the nicest casual dress I have, along with my shower supplies. I needed a long, hot shower to help me relax. 

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“Coming!” I shout as I hear a repetitive knock on my door. I finish sliding my foot into my strappy silver heel and fling open the door, revealing Lydia in a gorgeous royal blue dress. She immediately envelops me into a hug.

“It’s been so long!” She squeals before snapping away from me, grabbing ahold of my arms. “I want to hear everything!” I laugh and grab my bag, closing the door behind me. 

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“A what?” Lydia asks, confused. 

“A Xana” I repeat myself. “I’m not surprised that you haven’t heard of it. Theres not too much about my kind. I was lucky enough to have been mentored by the husband of one who was killed.”

“So what does it mean? Did you find out why you kept losing yourself?” Lydia asked, intrigued.

“Well, from what Martez told me, there has been centuries of inner turmoil in my kind. The fight between good and bad is a constant inside of me. There are tales of Xana’s great thievery when it came to materialistic goods as well as children. But there are also tales of their compassion and beauty. From the culling we faced so long ago, we had to form as one cohesive unit in order to stay alive, so amongst that time there was inter-breeding and the swapping of ideologies. Now, I don’t know if theirs one pure blooded Xana alive.”

“Wow. I’m so happy that you got the chance to find all of this out.”

“It’s the best thing I’ve ever done in my life. I backpacked through the whole of Europe- which coincidentally was when I met Jackson in London. I saw the most amazing sights. The temples in Indonesia. The rolling green hills in Brazil. The great Poyang Lake of China. Martez had informed me that fresh and pure water was where I would find the answers to any questions he couldn’t answer. And he was right. I felt like I was beginning to lose my sense of self out there. And one day, while I was camping by the lake in a rocky forrest, I saw a glimmering light. I followed it to the lakeside, and a giant blue beacon shot from where I was knelt to the other side of the lake, and I knew. It was time to come home.” I smiled at the memory. 

“The Nemeton” Lydia breathes. I nod. 

“I was lucky enough to visit several. In Chengzhou, China I first was drawn to it. I didn’t know what it was until I found Martez in Brazil, along with the second Nemeta. After we had finished, he suggested I visit the one in Toulouse, France. And from there I found myself following whatever lake, river, or body of water I came by. Eventually, I ended up at the Thames, face to face with Jackson. He told me about his past few years and passed on your number for when I knew it was time.” 

“Wow. I need to go on some enlightenment holiday.” She says, deep in thought. 

“So anyway, tell me about everything I’ve missed!” I smile, eager to hear about how everyone has been. I secretly prayed that Lydia would tell me how Stiles has been awaiting my return, but I knew not to get my hopes up.

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“I cannot wait to see the looks on their faces!” Lydia laughs as she hears the doorbell ring.

“What do you mean? Wait- Lydia, you didn’t tell them I was back?!” I whisper yell out of pure shock. Lydia had lured me back to her place, insisting that everyone was excited to see me. Now who knows! They might not have wanted to see me again. Especially Stiles. 

“Oh come on, it’ll all be worth it seeing the look on Stiles’ face” She sniggers playfully, looking out the window. “False alarm, it’s just Scott and Malia. Stay here.” She says and quickly makes her way downstairs. I could hear distant laughter and murmuring as I sat on Lydias bed, worried. Scott came with Malia. What if Stiles comes with someone? I quickly stand up and begin gathering my things. 

“What are you doing?” Lydia asks as she makes her way back into the room. 

“I shouldn’t be here.” I quickly say, embarrassed with myself. 

“What do you mean? Everyones going to be ecstatic to see you!” My mind flashes back to the last time I saw Stiles. His pained expression was imprinted into my mind. It was all I saw the first year after I left. “You need to sit down” Lydia says, growingly becoming worried. I take a seat back on her bed and try to steady my breathing. 

“You said how Scott found love so many times over. What about Stiles?” I ask, feeling like a weak schoolgirl once again. Lydia remains silent for a few seconds. “Please, just tell me.” I whisper.

“Stiles and I found love in each other. I didn’t want to tell you because I didn’t want to make you feel bad. But it’s all in the past now. After we both finished school and went our seperate ways, we realised our lives just didn’t match up to one another’s. I can’t say I don’t love him still, but I’m not in love with him anymore. And I know we didn’t spend too much time together, but I knew even back then that you two were always going to end up together. Even years after you had left, he’d be talking about you, or smiling about an old memory. I can only hope I find someone who leaves such a permanent and beautiful mark on me.” Lydia says, as if she has already rehearsed this speech. 

“Thanks. I really needed to hear that.” I say, trying to hold back the welling tears in my eyes. As she envelops me in a hug, the doorbell goes off again. She pulls away and smiles at me, she already knew who was here. And I could feel it in my bones too.

“Come down in 5.” She semi-squeals, before closing the door behind her. I stand up and look at myself in the mirror. A gorgeous white wrap dress clung to my figure with large sheer ruffles decorating it. I ran my fingers through my hair and sighed. This was it. Six long years and it was time. I made my way to the door and grabbed the handle, leaning my head against it for a second, praying for strength. Without giving myself time to think twice, I opened the door and began making my way downstairs. 

“Who’s that?” I hear Scott voice out as he hears my shoes click against the wooden stairs.

“About that, I have a surprise.” I hear Lydia giggle, and I can picture the cheeky smile she’d be wearing. My heart skips a beat and I stumble down the stairs, grabbing ahold of the railing.

“Fuck!” I blurt to myself and I look up to see a figure I haven’t seen for six years staring back at me. 

“(Y/N)?” Stiles whispers, in disbelief. 

“Not the graceful entrance Lydia was hoping for.” I giggle to myself, trying to ease the pounding in my chest. 

“When-”

“Did you say (Y/N)?” I hear another voice shout before I see Scott’s playful smile appear from around the other side of the wall. “I- You know what, now I understand the decorations.” He jokes before making his way over to me, opening his arms. I tear my eyes away from Stiles’ and make my way down the remaining stairs and reciprocate his hug. 

“I don’t know how I went six years without one of these hugs.” I giggle as Scott squeezes me tight. I pull away and look back at Stiles. I really wanted to hug him but I didn’t know if he was still mad at me. I didn’t know if he even wanted to see me. I feel my eyes welling up yet again out of fear of rejection, which he notices immediately. 

“Come here.” He says softly, before pulling me in for a deep hug. I wrap my arms around him and inhale, missing the sent of his cologne. I didn’t want to let go, but I knew I had to. 

“Come, I’ll introduce you.” Scott says as he drags me into the room by hand. I see Lydia chatting with the rest of the people, no doubt explaining what was happening in the other room. I look around and can’t help but feel a pang in my chest when I don’t see Allison, remembering what Jackson had told me. If I knew what was going to happen, I would have said more. I would have tried harder to keep in touch. I didn’t get the chance to say goodbye.

I feel a familiar hand slip into mine which I’m thankful for. Stiles was someone who battled through a lot of anxiety, I’m sure he could sense mine from a mile away. I look up at him and smile gently, thanking him silently. 

“This is Malia, Liam, and Theo. Guys, this is (Y/N)” I wave awkwardly with my free hand. 

“It’s nice to see you guys managed to actually make new friends.” I joked. When I left, the boys were just a couple of dorks who freaked out when I tried to introduce them to new people. Its a bittersweet memory, thinking of all the things I’ve missed out on. They’re probably completely different people now. 

“Well, they actually tied me up and kidnapped me.” Liam says, deadpan. I look, over at Lydia trying to see if he was joking or not. She just shrugged her shoulders back at me. 

“He’s not joking,” Theo speaks up. “And I tried to kill them”. 

“You did kill me, Theo” Scott says, obviously still a bit pissed off. Theo simply flicks his hand as to dismiss Scott. I furrow my eyebrows, confused.

“Well, theres a few things you skipped over at dinner” I laugh, looking at Lydia uncomfortably. 

“I can’t fit six years into one dinner. Plus, I’m sure Stiles can fill you in later.” She winks. I pull my hand away from his, not wanting the others to see me. 

"For some reason I thought murder and kidnapping would be a more pressing subject than your 21st birthday party” I smile through my sarcastic tone.

“Well, then you’d think wrong.” She said, equally as sarcastic. “Come, sit. I’m sure the others are dying to hear about your adventure!”

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I looked down at my phone seeing it was past 1am. Since Lydia picked me up, I had no way of getting myself home. And since she was currently 8 strawberry daiquiris deep, and passed out on Malia’s lap, she had no way of getting me home either. 

“It’s been great getting to catch up with you all, but I’ve still got to unpack my PJ’s let alone get to bed” I laugh, standing up. I’m met with a chorus of ‘goodbye’s and ‘nice meeting you’s.

“I’ll walk you out?” Stiles says, standing up from beside me. I gently nod, and make my way to the front door. 

“How are you getting home?” He asked, clearly knowing I had only been back in Beacon Hills for less than 24 hours. 

“Just thought I’d grab an uber. I’m using nans old car at the moment but Lydia picked me up.” I said, nonchalantly. 

“Don’t be silly. I’ll drive you.” Stiles says.

“You don’t have to do that.” I try to rebut.

“Why waste 10 bucks when you have a chauffeur right here” He says, presenting himself. I laugh in response, happy to feel so comfortable with Stiles after all these years. Its just easy with him. 

“Well, if you insist.” I smile. He opens the door and gestures for me to go in front of him. “Thank you, kind sir.” I laugh back. 

“So, I take it you’ve moved into your nan’s old place” He asks as we jump into his car. I nod, still heartbroken over her death. “She was a great woman.” Stiles said, obviously sensing the shift in mood. 

“She really was” I smile softly.

“She would always say how proud she was of you. How she wished she had the determination you did. At first, I couldn’t understand how she was so happy to have lost you. But then I realised that she never lost you. She just gave you room to grow.” Stiles said, staring at the road ahead.

“You visited her?” I asked, confused as to why nan never told me.

“Every Friday night Dad and I would swing by for dinner. At first, I’ll admit I really didn’t want to. But her homemade stew made it all the worthwhile.” He joked. I giggled to myself before feeling the silence creep back in.

“I’m sorry.” I admit.

“What? What do you have to be sorry for?” Stiles said, already knowing what was coming. 

“I shouldn’t have left things the way I did. I wouldn’t take back everything I’ve learnt over the past six years for the world, but I do really regret what happened between us.” I admit, feeling my throat tighten. 

“(Y/N), you did what you had to. And although its not nice to come to terms with, it was what was best for me. I had cornered myself off from the entire world, thinking that you and I could live in a perfect little bubble. What you did really just woke me up to the world. And probably saved my life if I’m honest.” I placed my hand upon his which rested on the gear clutch. 

“I heard about your dealings with an ancient dark spirit.” 

“Don’t remind me” He shakes his head, playfully. 

“I knew you were strong, but phew” I fan my face, chuckling. 

“Don’t you start.” He jokingly threatens. I rest my head back against the headrest, and examine Stiles in all his glory. His now prominent stubble, his strong and veiny arms. He’s changed quite a bit, but there was one thing I knew he’d never change. Roscoe. 

“God, I didn’t realise how much I missed this car.” I laugh, admiring the bumps and dints, and all the memories that came with it. 

“A lot of good memories,” Stiles smiles. “And you did pop your cherry in the back of it.” He quickly looks back over at me and laughs harder when he sees my mouth agape, shocked at his brazen attitude. 

“Stiles! Don’t you start!” I laugh.  Slowly, we come to a halt and I realise we’re out the front of my place. I look out the window, and back at Stiles. I don’t want to step out of the car. I don’t want to leave him again. 

“Well, here’s your stop.” Stiles said, clearly also holding something back. 

“Did you want to come in?” I ask, feeling the words leave my body before I can even think. 

“Are you sure?” Stiles asks, knowing if we go down this road, neither one of us will be able to turn back. I smile softly and nod. He smiles back and jumps out of the car, following me inside.