Adam they/them
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â
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i don't do bad sauce passes
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I'd rather be in outer space đ¸
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@im-tempted
Adam they/them
My accolades
a tumblr comment made by trenchcrows

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Several shitposts because we all feel like the butt of the joke for getting our hopes up about aa7 today
Every state split in half by population â the densest half and least dense half
Me when i definitely know what halves are
Oh youâre part of the densest half
@aphantomdweeb
Ummm she's literally sensitive :/

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just throwing this out there
who did this to me
9/100
đЏ

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Idk when people assume Akechi figures out who the phantom thieves are but I like to think it sometimes after Kaneshiro. So rank 1-3 is just him hanging out with this cool guy heâs just met.
But that also leaves a period of time where he realizes Morgana can talk but doesnât know why or if Akiren can hear him or not, but he also just ignores it because heâs ignored bigger things before (*cough cough* Sumire *cough cough*)
i will never be over the fact that during first contact a human offered their hand to a vulcan and the vulcan was just like âwow humans are fucking wildâ and took it
Humanityâs first contact with Vulcans was some guy going âIâm down to fuck.â
Vulcansâ first contact with Humans was an emphatic âSure.â
@sineala
#iiiiiiiiiiiiii mean vulcans had been watching humans for a long time#they knew the significance of a handshake but still#they had to find some fast and loose ambassador#willing to fuckin make out with a human for the sake of not offending them on first contact#lmao#star trek give me the story of this fast and loose vulcan
âsirâŚtheseâŚthese humansâŚthey greet each other byâŚâ *glances around before furtively whispering* âby clasping handsâŚâ
*prolonged silence* âoh myâŚâ
âsirâŚsir how will we make first contact with them? surely weâŚwe cannot refuse this handclasping ritual, they will take it as an insult, but what vulcan would agree to such a distasteful and uncomfortable ritual??â
*several pensive moments later*Â âcontact the vulcan high command and tell them to send us kuvak. i once saw that crazy son of a bitch arm wrestle a klingon, heâll put his hands on anythingâ
Elsewhere, w/ kuvak: ââŚ.my day has come.â
The vulcan who made first contact with humans is named Solkar guys. Yâall just be makinâ up names for characters that already have names.
Bonus: hereâs a screencap of Solkar doing the âmy body is readyâ pose right before he shakes Zefram Cochraneâs hand:
I swear Vulcans only come in two types and they are âdistant xenophobesâ or âhorny on main for humanityâ. Also apparently this guy is Spockâs great-grandfather and frankly that explains everything.
Hey so I looked into this at one point and that handshake literally created a lifelong telepathic bond between the two of them, and basically all of Solkarâs descendants were later obsessed with humans, including freaking SPOCK, so Iâm not saying that handshake was so gay and good that it created an intergenerational telepathic bond between Solkarâs descendants and humans, but Iâm also notâŚ.notâŚ.saying that.
actual footage of first contact makeouts
The slow deliberation with which Solkar takes CockraneâsâIâm sorry, Cochraneâsâhand⌠The sheer sensuality witch which Solkar infuses an otherwise borderline impersonal social ritual⌠It clearly shows a very conscious knowledge, on Solkarâs part, of what the significance of the handshake is in Vulcan terms and of how affected he is by it.
Thatâs why heâs so slow in doing it, and so sensual. A part of Solkar canât believe this is happening, despite it being a perfectly logical thing to expect from a human, and the rest of him canât believe how good it is.
I bet that if the camera zoomed in any further we would see the dilation of Solkarâs pupils and a quickly-repressed shiver of delight. Cochraneâs firm, businesslike clasp is probably (in sexual terms) being perceived as a deliciously carnal display of dominance.
No wonder Solkar is all like, âTAKE ME, YOU WILD-MANNERED BARBARIAN WITH ENTICINGLY ROUGH CALLUSES.â
And so we find out that yes, there is such a thing as bottoming in Pon-farr.
Every time this post comes round my dash, it just gets better.
#somehow the idea of vulcans being Horny On Main always gives me the giggles#like literally all they had to do#was be like actually#hand contact is very intimate for our species#and im p sure humanity as a whole would not find that insurmountably weird#there are human cultures that dont shake hands#vulcans are logical enough to think that through on their own#so clearly that vulcan was just down to fuck#down to fuck in a public#professional diplomatic situation no less#and he did not fucking care who knew it (via kittykatthetacodemon)
Some Vulcan: we could probably just explain that handshakes are intimate in our culture
Solkar, rubbing lip gloss on his hand: donât tell me how to do my jobÂ
Oh my god can they just kiss already
this is new
I've been in talks with tumblr management to replace the website with my self
> steam sends me an email
> game you wishlisted is on sale!
> wow, 30% off!
> $50
I can wait. You'll be 80% off one of these days. I'll outlast you.

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i hope a ceiling fan falls on the empty spot in the bed next to you and it starts understanding your needs
this post always makes me so emo... here's me next to my ceiling fan that i turned off for the first time in months to draw
stop reblogging this post without the art this is the only version that exists now
if you're having trouble sleeping the best you can do is put a bright object close to your face and look at it for at least 30 minutes. if that doesn't work you can close your eyes but make sure to think really hard about a bunch of bullshit