I'm Not Crazy

Genesis noticed the other excitement and refused to crush that for him. She nodded with a smile across her lips, “yes I would.” Although, honestly it wasn’t her she was worried about, but more so the people dealing with illness, but Ilhoon seemed okay for the moment, so she pushed that thought in the back of her mind. “Playing outside sounds perfect, leggo.” She smiled at him, and leaned against him as they made their way outside, “what game do you want to play?” She asked. 

Ilhoon didn’t try to hide the smile on his face after Genesis agreed to tell him if she wasn’t okay. Granted, he wasn’t sure what to do if something happened, but he would cross that bridge if and when he got to it. He led the way outside, a little too eagerly and pushed through the doors. The sky was overcast, but it was so much better than what counted as outside for the castle. “Uhm...tag. You’re it.” He yelled, tapping her shoulder and taking off down the path.

Glancing around them as he voiced his suggestion, the small blonde nodded, half paying attention. She didn’t care where they went, so long as they didnt stay where they were currently standing. She jumped, gaze flickering back to her opposite upon seeing his hand move out toward her out of her peripheral vision, before her sights dropped to his limb. Touching had always been something she struggled with, but the utterly suffocating feeling she felt was quickly becoming unbearable. Anastasia impulsively grabbed his hand, pulling him in the direction of the courtyard – though once they were on the right path to where they wanted to go, she didn’t hesitate to drop his hand. “S-Sorry about that… there’s j-just… um… someone I-I don’t want t-to s-see…”

Ilhoon gave her hand a little squeeze--just a small gesture of reassurance that, even if he couldn’t be much help to her, that he was there for her. “It’s okay. Personally, I don’t see anything wrong with holding hands. It’s just a nice thing to do. Even if you don’t mean anything by it. But I used to know this girl back a few years ago at the asylum, she used to blow every little touch out of control. If someone even brushed against her in the halls, it was like they attacked her. I don’t remember her name. She wasn’t there for too long. I don’t remember what happened to get either.” The lad pulled the door open to the courtyard and stepped aside so she could go out first. “Take a few deep breathes. We’ll be okay. I promise.” He smiled at her.

The small blonde nodded with a tight jaw, inhaling and exhaling deep breaths through her nose. She kept her chin angled downward, almost as though she was afraid to look up at him despite knowing – or, being relatively sure that he wasn’t going to hurt her. The touch alone still lingered on her skin like a series of vibrations, and it made her want to turn the other way and run for the discomfort it had set within her. It was in these moments of uncertainty that she often chose to picture a familiar face – Jason’s, a boy she’d known back at the asylum, and who she missed terribly, selfishly now. Slipping her hands over her elbows, Stassi turned her face from him to glance around, anxiety fixing itself in her chest. “…I-I want to g-get out of here…” She said softly, as though she were already expecting something big to happen – before suddenly turning back to look at her opposite with wide eyes. “N-Now.” She insisted.

Ilhoon pulled away as soon as he thought the girl was stable enough not to fall, but she didn’t seem to stable to him. She looked so on edge. “We can...we can go outside and get some air.” He suggested, suddenly feeling nervously at how helpless the girl looked. “Come on. Let’s go get some air.” He held out his hand as an offer to her.

As Anastasia caught a glimpse of someone nearby waving to her with a smile, her green eyes widened – gaze fixed on their face as she picked up her pace to pass them quickly. Though, as she did, her sights slipped down to her shoes in an effort to avoid seeming approachable – when suddenly she felt the side of her face collide against another body, the material of their shirt – and whatever else they might have been wearing – scratching against her cheek. With a hard gasp, she kept her head down as she leaped back, apologizing profusely, “I-I’m sorry! I’m s-so sorry! I-I’m s-sorry!”

Ilhoon reached out, grabbing the blonde so she didn’t fall as the two collided. “It’s okay. No blood, no foul.” He released his grip on the girl as she jumped back. “It’s okay, Stassi. You didn’t hurt me. Are you okay?”

Genesis offered IIhoon a small smile, somehow Genesis felt that the doctors would never arrive. It was too good to be true. “Yeah, yeah. I feel totally fine. I was just making sure, that’s all.” The smile seeming more uncertain at this point. “What would you like to do?” She smiled a bit more genuinely this time, figuring they might as well enjoy it while it lasted. 

A smile spread across Ilhoon’s face when he saw the older smile at him. Before he let himself get too happy, he tried to be serious. “If you don’t feel good, you’ll tell me right?” He asked, wanting to take care of her like she always took care of him. “I wanna go play outside. We haven’t been outside in forever.” He reached for her hand and headed down the far too familiar hall.

“Because there’s only one thing concerning me right now, and it’s not whether some damn curse broke or not.”

“It did. That’s why were back.”

“I wouldn’t count victory just yet, I mean there are no doctors around. Isn’t that odd? How do you feel? Are you feeling okay?”

“I feel fine. Maybe all the doctors are just on break or something. Do you feel okay? Am I not supposed to feel okay?”

“It’s doubtful, but like I said, I don’t care.” His lips quirked upwards in the beginning’s of a horrid smile, and he negated the boy’s step backwards by pointedly taking one forwards.

Ilhoon took another step back as the man got closer. “Why don’t you care?”

“Well, if it isn’t the last place I expected to see again…”

“How’d we get back?”

I-is it over? Did they really give up? Or am I dreaming?

“We’re back, Ginny. We’re not at the castle anymore. They let us go.”

“Very weird. But there’s nothing wrong with being weird. It’s not perfect, and I do strive for perfection so weird things aren’t in my taste, but if others want to be weird, all the power to them.” Evelina furrowed her brows, letting out a small laugh. “I am not cute.”

“Being weird is better than being normal. Perfect is an unreachable goal.: He shrugged. “That may be what you think. But you are cute. Very pretty.”

Ilhoon’s question was an odd one, in her opinion, but perhaps that was why it brought a subtle smile to her face. She didn’t like it at all – even less so than she liked Broken, and that was saying something. “It’s… okay.” She replied, her gaze glued to the steps she was taking. The blonde was aware that she wasn’t the easiest to converse with, and not every effort she made was always shown. To her, that was mostly the reason she only had one or two people she felt comfortable being around. It wasn’t easy for her to warm up to others, it took time and a serious drainage of her energy. However, rather than leaving him with two words, she forced herself to look up at him, wearing the friendliest expression she could portray. “I… like the b-books. I-I’ve… been trying to learn… how to play the p-piano from them. What… about you?”

Ilhoon ran his fingers along the wall as the duo walked. The texture of the stone wall against his fingers felt nice--plus it was something to do with his hands. “My brother can play piano. He tried to teach me more than once when he came to visit me at the asylum. But It’s really hard. I’ve just been exploring. There isn’t anything interesting here.”

“You weren’t bothering me. I wasn’t up to much anyway.”

“It’s alright....I probably just imagined it anyway...I do have psychosis after all.” He mumbled, staring at the ground.

Green hues lifting to look at her opposite, she couldn’t help the initial fear her cautious mind allowed to set in – even though it was her idea to hang around him. Anastasia forced a smile that was small at best, but still visible to the eye. “It’s okay… if I-I was only a few s-seconds… later… I m-might have been following you.” She said, maintaining the same curve of her lips as she gave a half shrug. Although she didn’t recognize him immediately, since she’d always been the girl curled up on her chair with her gaze down in group therapy sessions, she didn’t disbelieve him either. “Oh, I-I…. I’m sorry, that was… a l-long time ago…” She wondered if he even knew about her death – some of the people closest to her still didn’t. “I’m Anastasia.” She added quickly, though she assumed he already knew her name.

Ilhoon offered the nervous-looking girl a small smile. He remembered her from group therapy. She never said much, and when she did she always seemed like she was scared that someone would start yelling or laughing or something. The last thing he wanted to do right now was make her more nervous than she already was. “It’s okay, Anastasia.” He repeated her name so he would remember it. Sadly, he hadn’t remembered her name from group, just her face. “How do you like the caslte?” He asked, unsure of what to really say as they walked.