CLARINETISTS!!!!!

okay first, grooming is a serious allegation and requires a bit more premeditation which simply doesn't (AND CANNOT LOGISTICALLY) apply to MxM. so i'm not even going to give the time of day to that argument.

second, i'm rereading the series right now and i just got to book 5, and mia starts it when she's entering her sophomore year, which means we actually miss a decent chunk of the entire rest of the year & summer (not counting the novellas) about michael and mia's first year together. when mia does have the talk or whatever with michael, i feel like he's pretty reasonable. he attentively (CANONICALLY) listens to her and says that her worries actually don’t surprise him at all and he's totally ready to at least talk about it.

maybe when i read this series in middle/high school i would say yeah michael is being pushy when he asks when mia will be ready. but is he really? when he asks her when she'll be ready, she panics and says, "do i have to answer now? can i get a rain check" and michael (CANONICALLY) smiles sweetly and says of course.

i think where people might get a little jumbled is when he continues with "but just so you know, i'm not going to wait forever."

which is, funnily enough, one of my favorite lines because:

sorry, but he's not wrong. he's 18 years old and brimming with hormones and at this point has already known what sex feels like so ?? is it so irrational that he wants to actually do it with someone he loves this time??

mia says that he clearly says it "jokingly" and i just don't think we should take mia's characterization of...anyone seriously.

michael later on backtracks on this in book 10 and admits he WILL wait so the development is clear.

i wanna touch on the age gap though. while it's a relief that michael and mia don't DO anything until she's 18, i agree with you that we need to take the era into consideration. this series was published in the early 2000s!! i simply don't think we can use today's standards as a jumping off point for michael and mia. i have never thought weird about it because i've read meg cabot's other books and its so evident that she doesn't care much about the age gaps and doesn't create them so apart for the sake of making a statement. suze and jesse's age gap in the mediator series is 4 years where suze is 16 and jesse 20 (though older if you count him being dead for over a hundred years lol). this to me is such a non issue because michael clearly is not abusive, nor manipulative, and, like you said, has grown up with mia!!!

i think michael not handling the conversation past the 5th book well is part of his characterization. michael is known for being a little too patient with mia, while being more impatient with others. and he's a BOY who doesn't see hi girlfriend all the time because he doesn't go to school with her anymore AND she has genovian duties. this dude is sexually (and emotionally due to his parents' attempt at divorcing) repressed! and his girlfriend is really stupid sometimes! i get it dude.