Idzwanizey

I know this is some kinda normal thing to people but it’d happen for such a long time. Being alone is better than with a partner or at least one friend.

A person needed a time of his/her to think about whether to spend with me or not. Turns out later, they just being cool and said: “I can’t go out with you cuz I’m busy”. Ok, I understand everyone has their own life, but when it comes to early planning, that’s me, I prefer early plan rather on spontaneous.

Back to the story, turns out again, his/her so-called “busy” was having fun with someone more important than me (exclude family).

First thing first, he/she already announced that I’m a best friend towards them but where is the honesty as a best friend tho? Where is loyalty as a best friend? Where is the appreciation as a best friend? Where are the promises as a best friend? I kinda hate fabricating some bullshit friend but I already declared them as the closest friend.

I am more jovial if I having some good time. I do have my own life. But I’ll try to manage properly and try my best to find a proper time meeting him/her. But what my “best friend” did was easily saying “oh sorry, I got things to do” or “I’m busy, can’t catch up with you”. They simple texted me like no feeling guilty!

This makes me wanna swear to them.

I tried to keep myself private in terms of personal problems and be professional with others. But this one has been over the top. It’s like am letting to considered my tantrum. This problem happened after I enter my bachelor degree in masscom.

Two things I would like to express:

1- I felt discouraged by my surrounding because nobody appreciate my creativity

2- my creativity was criticised by the people who don’t give zero fucks towards art. All they see is “as long as shit’s there”.

I’m so jealous with my diploma experience because creativity is the key to live. Unfortunately, I left due to the huge gap between students and lecturers. Plus, bad hospitality towards the staff(I think it happens in any govt sector). And they far superior than us. Well that sucks being diploma students. But in Masscomm, art is not consider as creative but “communication” is the one.

It’s been a year(masscom) and I can pick whose got the fuckin worse in terms work of art. They all got bad taste to be honest but they feeling pride just because they “liked it”. What the hell! I am truly sorry if anyone feel offended by what I said but this is the truth beneath the people who has been involved in creative industry for years. All they can say is I need more study because I was so-called against the rule. BITCH! I’ve been in this industry for 3 years and you haven’t manage to know my background and yet to criticised what I did. I know what suits the best according to the needs. I try my best by being neutral in order to designing the task given. From my own patrol, neither male nor female, they’re not being neutral. I hate to say this, but you are the one who had the shittiest genre(it could be films, painting, music, etc).

I still remember by this guy who once said I can do whatever I want. Turns out, I don’t feel appreciated. It’s not like I wanted a plaque or getting an attention, I just want people to see me as a person keen on to his job & have more sense to acknowledge my purpose.

I am truly honored and appreciated by people who recognised my work. I will try my best to avoid any jealousy occur because I believe everyone’s opinion and they’re able to express what they like. But please, don’t be an asshole.

From what I saw these new phase, too many asshole I need to get through. There are so many people who was GILA KUASA in one organization. Not once, but thrice occured and ot could happen in the future(by the same people).