JUST ONE YESTERDAY

He was sad.

And a few years ago, that would’ve been a rare occurrence.

Now, it was a new normal. Something Tensei had to readdress day after day after--

Truthfully, he hated bringing it up. He hated taking attention away from other matters. Why did his sadness matter more than everything else going on? It didn’t, and for him to bring up his problems when there were other things to deal with--well, that was just plain selfish, especially when the sadness had seemingly no end in sight. Bringing it up would just make everyone else sad when they realized they couldn’t do anything for him.

So he said nothing. For days, he pushed those feelings down, out of the way, as he focused on just about anything else.

Which worked, for the most part, until he went down to the Pussycat’s office to visit Tomoko while she worked.

The moment she saw him, she sprung up from her desk, and bounced over, leaning forward until they were eyelevel. 

“Hi.” Tensei smiled, tilting his head up to kiss her, which she reciprocated--by grabbing hold of Tensei’s face, and pressing several, loud kisses to his mouth, cheeks, forehead, nose, which had him giggling as he allowed her to finish, clearing his throat when she pulled away. “What’s all that for?”

She shrugged, lifting her hands.

“I missed you, Tensei-chan. And you looked sad.” 

Oh. So he didn’t need to mention it at all.

Tensei let out a tiny chuckle, ignoring his watery eyes as he reached forward, and pulled her in for another kiss.

She was crying.

Between the two of them, someone seemed to always be crying. 

It wasn’t always a sad cry. But it usually was. They had a lot to cry about.

It was bedtime. Or, at least, the socially mandated time of day in which people were meant to go to bed. Nowadays, the idea of them both falling asleep peacefully for a full eight hours was the closest thing to a nice dream either of them could have.

“I know.” He whispered as he pulled her close, fingers sliding through her hair as he kissed away the tears that rolled down her face.

Tensei very well couldn’t tell her “It’ll be alright” because he didn’t know if it would be. And he couldn’t say “It’s not real” because it was real. And he had been having the same nightmares enough to know that none of that provided any comfort. It didn’t really seem like anything did.

Lying wouldn’t do them any good. So, he had to speak in absolute truths.

“I love you.” Tensei finally whispered, and she nodded quickly as even more tears started to fall. He felt her hand on his chest, weakly gripping at the fabric of his shirt. So, he tugged her closer.

“I’m right here.” He mumbled against her skin as he pressed a few more kisses over her face. “Do you want some water?”

She shook her head.

“Want to stay like this?”

She nodded.

“Alright. We can stay.”

So they stayed, with Tensei’s fingers dragging through Tomoko’s hair as he periodically kissed her tear-soaked face. “I’ll be here when you wake up.” He promised, feeling her relax against him.

What felt like hours had passed, but eventually her eyes fell shut, and her breathing evened out, and Tensei was able to drift off shortly after her.

He woke up that next morning with a start–his breathing heavy as the same feelings he felt so many months ago came rushing back all over again. 

Her hand touched his arm, and he startled–she gently apologized, and opened her arms to him. 

It was still too early to tell.

There wasn’t a body. Or a sign of forced entry. Or anything like that. He was just…gone.

He lived in a secure building. He would’ve been safe. He should’ve been safe.

The police wouldn’t do much. Couldn’t do much.

‘You know,’ Some detective had told them, ‘A lot of the time, after a traumatic event, people will…disappear. Run off somewhere. Try to find some semblance of normalcy again. Do you think it’s possible tha–’

Tora stood and left the room.

Tomoko was shaking her head while tears ran down her face.

‘No,’ She signed. ‘No, he wouldn’t–’

They didn’t talk about it on the way to Tensei’s parents’ place. Nor did they make any mention of Tomoko’s bloodshot eyes when Tensei’s mom looked on in concern when handing Tensei the diaper bag.

It wasn’t until they were back in their own apartment, the baby bouncing along in some weird circular seat that Tensei didn’t recognize when Tomoko brought it home, probably because Tenya, as a baby, did not require any extra leg workouts as he probably would’ve launched himself through the ceiling, had he bounced a little too hard.

But their baby was, at least, for now, without leg rockets. So bouncing was an acceptable activity. Bounce away, tiny human.

Tensei was pulled from his thoughts when his arm was nudged up, and Tomoko crawled into his lap. Instinctively, Tensei’s arm tightened around her, pulling her close, and pressing a kiss to the top of her head.

“Maybe he went to Milan.” Tensei mumbled. “If I were him, I’d go to Milan. That’s where all the fashionistas are, right? Or is it Paris? Both? Is it both? I feel like it’s both. Milan sounds funner, though. if you ask me.” 

He rambled on about absolutely nothing for a few minutes, one arm around her waist, and his other hand stroking her hair slowly. Tensei tilted his head to catch her eye, pouting a bit as he sighed. “Hey–hey, seriously, we’ll find him, alright? He’s one of the best out there. I’d say it’s more likely that he went on vacation and forgot to tell all of us than it is that anyone could even lay a finger on him. Seriously. For…for all we know, he might have…I don’t know…a cousin none of us know about that he took the train to see. Or–” A gasp. “A secret child with an ex-lover…or–wait. Does he–is Best Jeanist gay?”

Tensei furrowed his eyebrows as he thought for a long moment, before letting out a small, defeated sigh. “No, no, seriously, I…I know this is really hard. I was about ready to turn this country upside down when you were gone and I couldn’t. I couldn’t move. I couldn’t do anything, but–but I had to trust that…everyone else would be able to handle it. i think this is…kind of like being on a hero team…” He mumbled, eyes shifting over to the baby, who was now hopping while shaking some plastic rattle–the sound of which was definitely hitting the back of Tensei’s skull in all the wrong ways. Oh, he’d be feeling that later.

“It’s…well, when you’re on a team, you have to trust that everyone does their jobs, right? That’s how you do the most efficient work. If you spend your time worrying if Tiger is doing this or that then it detracts from the work you’re doing. But when you all…trust each other, then that’s when the good stuff happens, right? That’s how lives get saved. When you were gone I realized…well, me being involved in that at all would slow everyone down. I’d be a liability, if anything. So I had to sit, and wait. And try my hardest to not stress out because when I stress out too much I get sick and oh my god, if I have to hear that stupid doctor lecture on keeping my heart rate down one more time–” He trailed off, shaking his head. “No–I mean–yeah, we’ll be up the police’s ass about it, of course, but we aren’t…in a place to go save the day anymore. We need to trust that heroes will keep on saving and the police will keep on…policing…? Even without us. Because now…” 

Tensei squished Tomoko’s cheeks in his hand, guiding her gaze to the still bouncing baby. Rock on, little weirdo.

“This is our job now. And It sucks that this is happening, and I know how easy it is to feel helpless right now, because I get that, trust me, I do, but–Hakamata kept his ranking while being on a hiatus. That is someone who is so loved that…his fans won’t let him stay missing for long. And neither will the rest of the pros. They’ll find him. Someone will. I’m sure of it. And we’ll do what we can, too. But that’s all we can do. That’s all anyone can ever do.”