SMAPPIE, CARAT, ARMY, STAY ❤️

“I say more dumb things before 9 A.M. than most people say all day.”

“So it seems like this internet thing is here to stay.”

“Hi, I’m Chandler. I make jokes when I’m uncomfortable.”

“I’m not great at the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?”

“I’m a gym member. I try to go 4x a week, but I’ve missed the last 1200x.”

“Until I was 25, I thought the only response to ‘I love you’ Was ‘Oh, crap!”

“I tend to keep talking until somebody stops me.”

“What must it be like not to be crippled by fear and self-loathing?”

“It’s always better to lie than to have the complicated discussion.”

“Cheese. It’s milk that you chew.”

“I’m hopeless and awkward and desperate for love!”

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