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Joost Van Poel

@i-only-have-two-problems

Gaurd of Councilman Hoed, Mustache owner(its there, trust)

143 posts

i-only-have-two-problems

Jan 28

Intro post

IMPORTANT: I AM NOT GOING TO BE HERE FROM JUNE 28TH TO JULY 25TH, Interact with me as normal but I will not be able to respond

Joost Van Poel, Guard of Councilman Hoede

Likes: Anya, Raisa, my job, my mustache, goede omens(ooc: I made him a good omens fan because I have free will and none of you can stop me)

Dislikes: the moon, people insulting my mustache

ooc:

slightly canon divergent: Joost lives(clearly, hes not shitposting from the grave)

if you see posts mentioning Anya, those are not part of the timeline

this is a Joost rp blog, take nothing I say seriously

main blog: @queerbookbitch

I am a MINOR

Part of the Ketterdamn rp, so it is 3 years post crooked kingdom

other Ketterdam inhabiting people(and one Ketterdam inhabiting demon)

Raisa safin: @the-safin-sister

Kaz “Dirtyhands” Brekker: @kazgr

Inej “Wraith” Ghafa: @captainghafaofthewraith

Nina Zenik: @ninagirlkisserzenik

Wylan Van Eck: @vanecksprodigalson

Jesper Fahey: @gunslingerofthebarrell

Kuwei Yul-Bo: @kuweiyulcombo

Anika: @coolestcrowinkedderdam

Marya Hendriks: @wylanscoolmom

Alys Van Eck: @alysthesingingmom

Joost Van Poel: @i-only-have-two-problems

Miraya Kipadia: @petals-of-lilac

Sofiya Volkov: @inferniofthesecondarmy

@wavescyber I'm sorry, its boring

#joost rp #six of crows #grishaverse rp #joost van poel #grishaverse #six of crows rp #ketterdam rp

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•18+ Adults Only

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i-only-have-two-problems

Jul 17

Well okay hi there

hi?

#OOC: OMG HI MOOT DONT QUESTION WHY IM HERE BUT HI I MISSED TALKING TO YOU SO MUCH #joost rp #joost van poel #six of crows #six of crows rp #grishaverse rp #ketterdam rp #grishaverse #soc #soc rp

i-only-have-two-problems

Jun 27

hi y'all! I will not have access to internet starting Sunday(jun 28) so all of my blogs will be on a hiatus. I'll be back July 25th!! I'll miss you guys, you can still send asks and interact as normal, I just won't be able to answer them

i-only-have-two-problems

Jun 23

i-only-have-two-problems

Your mustache is atrocious.

- @i-hate-my-son

ok well fuck you too

at least I didn't get embarrassed and outsmarted by a group of teenagers in front of all of my coworkers

I’d say you get embarrassed often enough, walking around with whatever that is on your face.

Or are you not bright enough to notice?

i-only-have-two-problems

your son stole your house and your ex wife (who is barely older than your son, which is disgusting in its own way) is fucking her music teacher and has never been happier because she is finally rid of you

My ex-wife gave me an incompetent son, and is now with a musician?

I should have known something was wrong with her.

i-only-have-two-problems

I meant Alys, but I guess it must get confusing with how many women are living their best lives once you leave. the call is coming from inside the house.

You’re correct for once. I do tend to mix up the unimportant things. What does it matter? As… maximalist… as they were, I don’t find myself thinking back on the two much.

i-only-have-two-problems

you'd think with all that exposure to the barrel you would be better at lying. I guess not. small dick energy fr

What??

What does that even mean??? Why would I waste time on useless daydreams about my past? Is that something you do often? And what does it have to do with— never mind. Your generation is messed up. I am leaving.

i-only-have-two-problems

if you and Pekka Rollins fucked you would be the bottom

I don’t care for Pekka Rollins and never will. Besides, this conversation is over already. Leave.

i-only-have-two-problems

a likely story. you guys are still my favorite evil yaoi. who cares if this conversation is over, you could have left already, and yet...

And yet you’re still pestering me.

It’s not polite to leave the other party unanswered in a conversation. You should know that. I thought you were of higher class than the Crows.

Get the last word. I couldn’t care less. Just leave.

timelinesjwriter

@i-only-have-two-problems its ok his mustache is way uglier than yours could ever be. and he has ugly shoelaces.

"Could ever be".

Yes, how could I forget. The man doesn't even have a mustache yet. His mustache has the potential to be better than mine.

timelinesjwriter

he already has a damn mustache, i meant yours could never be better. also i wasn't talking to you. don't talk to me again or i'll send a mob of birds to murder you.

i-only-have-two-problems

jaybird is the only good person on this web site

timelinesjwriter

yay yippee!!!!!!!!!! do you want to eat this apple 🍎 that i procured legally 😊

i-only-have-two-problems

um....sure?

#ooc: unrelated but I am stealing that comment to use for a good omens text post

i-only-have-two-problems

Jun 23

i-only-have-two-problems

Your mustache is atrocious.

- @i-hate-my-son

ok well fuck you too

at least I didn't get embarrassed and outsmarted by a group of teenagers in front of all of my coworkers

I’d say you get embarrassed often enough, walking around with whatever that is on your face.

Or are you not bright enough to notice?

i-only-have-two-problems

your son stole your house and your ex wife (who is barely older than your son, which is disgusting in its own way) is fucking her music teacher and has never been happier because she is finally rid of you

My ex-wife gave me an incompetent son, and is now with a musician?

I should have known something was wrong with her.

i-only-have-two-problems

I meant Alys, but I guess it must get confusing with how many women are living their best lives once you leave. the call is coming from inside the house.

You’re correct for once. I do tend to mix up the unimportant things. What does it matter? As… maximalist… as they were, I don’t find myself thinking back on the two much.

i-only-have-two-problems

you'd think with all that exposure to the barrel you would be better at lying. I guess not. small dick energy fr

What??

What does that even mean??? Why would I waste time on useless daydreams about my past? Is that something you do often? And what does it have to do with— never mind. Your generation is messed up. I am leaving.

i-only-have-two-problems

if you and Pekka Rollins fucked you would be the bottom

I don’t care for Pekka Rollins and never will. Besides, this conversation is over already. Leave.

i-only-have-two-problems

a likely story. you guys are still my favorite evil yaoi. who cares if this conversation is over, you could have left already, and yet...

And yet you’re still pestering me.

It’s not polite to leave the other party unanswered in a conversation. You should know that. I thought you were of higher class than the Crows.

Get the last word. I couldn’t care less. Just leave.

i-only-have-two-problems

I mean most people consider it impolite to hire people to kill/torture your son on two different occasions, kidnap a teenage girl, refuse to pay people when you said you would, abuse your son, and tell your son his mom died and send her away, so I guess you might not be the leading authority on what is polite

inedibleplastic

Manners and morals don't come as one. I could be polite and say please stop interacting with me. I could also be polite and slit your throat.

Of course, I wouldn't want to get my hands dirty.

you never want to get your hands dirty do you. thats why you hired the crows and miggson and prior, right?

i-only-have-two-problems

ooc: I just realized we both used the wrong accounts for this. pretend these are the same accounts guys

SweetDream.ai • Live Cam

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

i-only-have-two-problems

Jun 23

i-only-have-two-problems

Your mustache is atrocious.

- @i-hate-my-son

ok well fuck you too

at least I didn't get embarrassed and outsmarted by a group of teenagers in front of all of my coworkers

I’d say you get embarrassed often enough, walking around with whatever that is on your face.

Or are you not bright enough to notice?

i-only-have-two-problems

your son stole your house and your ex wife (who is barely older than your son, which is disgusting in its own way) is fucking her music teacher and has never been happier because she is finally rid of you

My ex-wife gave me an incompetent son, and is now with a musician?

I should have known something was wrong with her.

i-only-have-two-problems

I meant Alys, but I guess it must get confusing with how many women are living their best lives once you leave. the call is coming from inside the house.

You’re correct for once. I do tend to mix up the unimportant things. What does it matter? As… maximalist… as they were, I don’t find myself thinking back on the two much.

i-only-have-two-problems

you'd think with all that exposure to the barrel you would be better at lying. I guess not. small dick energy fr

What??

What does that even mean??? Why would I waste time on useless daydreams about my past? Is that something you do often? And what does it have to do with— never mind. Your generation is messed up. I am leaving.

i-only-have-two-problems

if you and Pekka Rollins fucked you would be the bottom

I don’t care for Pekka Rollins and never will. Besides, this conversation is over already. Leave.

i-only-have-two-problems

a likely story. you guys are still my favorite evil yaoi. who cares if this conversation is over, you could have left already, and yet...

And yet you’re still pestering me.

It’s not polite to leave the other party unanswered in a conversation. You should know that. I thought you were of higher class than the Crows.

Get the last word. I couldn’t care less. Just leave.

timelinesjwriter

@i-only-have-two-problems its ok his mustache is way uglier than yours could ever be. and he has ugly shoelaces.

"Could ever be".

Yes, how could I forget. The man doesn't even have a mustache yet. His mustache has the potential to be better than mine.

timelinesjwriter

he already has a damn mustache, i meant yours could never be better. also i wasn't talking to you. don't talk to me again or i'll send a mob of birds to murder you.

i-only-have-two-problems

jaybird is the only good person on this web site

#ooc this is fucking incredible #<-yay thank you

i-only-have-two-problems

Jun 23

i-only-have-two-problems

Your mustache is atrocious.

- @i-hate-my-son

ok well fuck you too

at least I didn't get embarrassed and outsmarted by a group of teenagers in front of all of my coworkers

I’d say you get embarrassed often enough, walking around with whatever that is on your face.

Or are you not bright enough to notice?

i-only-have-two-problems

your son stole your house and your ex wife (who is barely older than your son, which is disgusting in its own way) is fucking her music teacher and has never been happier because she is finally rid of you

My ex-wife gave me an incompetent son, and is now with a musician?

I should have known something was wrong with her.

i-only-have-two-problems

I meant Alys, but I guess it must get confusing with how many women are living their best lives once you leave. the call is coming from inside the house.

You’re correct for once. I do tend to mix up the unimportant things. What does it matter? As… maximalist… as they were, I don’t find myself thinking back on the two much.

i-only-have-two-problems

you'd think with all that exposure to the barrel you would be better at lying. I guess not. small dick energy fr

What??

What does that even mean??? Why would I waste time on useless daydreams about my past? Is that something you do often? And what does it have to do with— never mind. Your generation is messed up. I am leaving.

i-only-have-two-problems

if you and Pekka Rollins fucked you would be the bottom

I don’t care for Pekka Rollins and never will. Besides, this conversation is over already. Leave.

i-only-have-two-problems

a likely story. you guys are still my favorite evil yaoi. who cares if this conversation is over, you could have left already, and yet...

And yet you’re still pestering me.

It’s not polite to leave the other party unanswered in a conversation. You should know that. I thought you were of higher class than the Crows.

Get the last word. I couldn’t care less. Just leave.

i-only-have-two-problems

I mean most people consider it impolite to hire people to kill/torture your son on two different occasions, kidnap a teenage girl, refuse to pay people when you said you would, abuse your son, and tell your son his mom died and send her away, so I guess you might not be the leading authority on what is polite

#wait they need a ship name #<YES THEY DO #might I suggest Rolecks #like the watch brand lol #<- moot you are a genius

i-only-have-two-problems

Jun 23

i-only-have-two-problems

Your mustache is atrocious.

- @i-hate-my-son

ok well fuck you too

at least I didn't get embarrassed and outsmarted by a group of teenagers in front of all of my coworkers

I’d say you get embarrassed often enough, walking around with whatever that is on your face.

Or are you not bright enough to notice?

i-only-have-two-problems

your son stole your house and your ex wife (who is barely older than your son, which is disgusting in its own way) is fucking her music teacher and has never been happier because she is finally rid of you

My ex-wife gave me an incompetent son, and is now with a musician?

I should have known something was wrong with her.

i-only-have-two-problems

I meant Alys, but I guess it must get confusing with how many women are living their best lives once you leave. the call is coming from inside the house.

You’re correct for once. I do tend to mix up the unimportant things. What does it matter? As… maximalist… as they were, I don’t find myself thinking back on the two much.

i-only-have-two-problems

you'd think with all that exposure to the barrel you would be better at lying. I guess not. small dick energy fr

What??

What does that even mean??? Why would I waste time on useless daydreams about my past? Is that something you do often? And what does it have to do with— never mind. Your generation is messed up. I am leaving.

i-only-have-two-problems

if you and Pekka Rollins fucked you would be the bottom

I don’t care for Pekka Rollins and never will. Besides, this conversation is over already. Leave.

i-only-have-two-problems

a likely story. you guys are still my favorite evil yaoi. who cares if this conversation is over, you could have left already, and yet...

#ooc: why is this making me want to write jan van eck x Pekka Rollins fanfic #wait they need a ship name

i-only-have-two-problems

Jun 23

i-only-have-two-problems

Your mustache is atrocious.

- @i-hate-my-son

ok well fuck you too

at least I didn't get embarrassed and outsmarted by a group of teenagers in front of all of my coworkers

I’d say you get embarrassed often enough, walking around with whatever that is on your face.

Or are you not bright enough to notice?

i-only-have-two-problems

your son stole your house and your ex wife (who is barely older than your son, which is disgusting in its own way) is fucking her music teacher and has never been happier because she is finally rid of you

My ex-wife gave me an incompetent son, and is now with a musician?

I should have known something was wrong with her.

i-only-have-two-problems

I meant Alys, but I guess it must get confusing with how many women are living their best lives once you leave. the call is coming from inside the house.

You’re correct for once. I do tend to mix up the unimportant things. What does it matter? As… maximalist… as they were, I don’t find myself thinking back on the two much.

i-only-have-two-problems

you'd think with all that exposure to the barrel you would be better at lying. I guess not. small dick energy fr

What??

What does that even mean??? Why would I waste time on useless daydreams about my past? Is that something you do often? And what does it have to do with— never mind. Your generation is messed up. I am leaving.

i-only-have-two-problems

if you and Pekka Rollins fucked you would be the bottom

#ooc: sorry moor is this making you uncomfortable? I can stop

i-only-have-two-problems

Jun 23

i-only-have-two-problems

Your mustache is atrocious.

- @i-hate-my-son

ok well fuck you too

at least I didn't get embarrassed and outsmarted by a group of teenagers in front of all of my coworkers

I’d say you get embarrassed often enough, walking around with whatever that is on your face.

Or are you not bright enough to notice?

i-only-have-two-problems

your son stole your house and your ex wife (who is barely older than your son, which is disgusting in its own way) is fucking her music teacher and has never been happier because she is finally rid of you

My ex-wife gave me an incompetent son, and is now with a musician?

I should have known something was wrong with her.

i-only-have-two-problems

I meant Alys, but I guess it must get confusing with how many women are living their best lives once you leave. the call is coming from inside the house.

You’re correct for once. I do tend to mix up the unimportant things. What does it matter? As… maximalist… as they were, I don’t find myself thinking back on the two much.

i-only-have-two-problems

you'd think with all that exposure to the barrel you would be better at lying. I guess not. small dick energy fr

SweetDream.ai • Live Cam

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

i-only-have-two-problems

Jun 22

QOTD // question of the day #15

What's your claim to fame?

@kazgr @captainghafaofthewraith @gunslingerofthebarrell @ninagirlkisserzenik @loveofthes-n @ajathesqualler @i-hate-my-son @coolestcrowinketterdam @i-only-have-two-problems @the-safin-sister @verlesandpearls @blazinginferni @sankt-adrik-the-uneven @laoise-inthecity

the-safin-sister

I haven't really got one.

i-only-have-two-problems

isn't your sister part of the ravkan triumvirate. that seems like a claim to fame to me

i-only-have-two-problems

Jun 22

i-only-have-two-problems

Your mustache is atrocious.

- @i-hate-my-son

ok well fuck you too

at least I didn't get embarrassed and outsmarted by a group of teenagers in front of all of my coworkers

I’d say you get embarrassed often enough, walking around with whatever that is on your face.

Or are you not bright enough to notice?

i-only-have-two-problems

your son stole your house and your ex wife (who is barely older than your son, which is disgusting in its own way) is fucking her music teacher and has never been happier because she is finally rid of you

My ex-wife gave me an incompetent son, and is now with a musician?

I should have known something was wrong with her.

i-only-have-two-problems

I meant Alys, but I guess it must get confusing with how many women are living their best lives once you leave. the call is coming from inside the house.

#also I must add that Jan is defo posturing with this one #he really did love marya before (but the first stage of grief is denial)#ah I love this guy #<- well most of what he does is posturing

i-only-have-two-problems

Jun 22

i-only-have-two-problems

Your mustache is atrocious.

- @i-hate-my-son

ok well fuck you too

at least I didn't get embarrassed and outsmarted by a group of teenagers in front of all of my coworkers

I’d say you get embarrassed often enough, walking around with whatever that is on your face.

Or are you not bright enough to notice?

i-only-have-two-problems

your son stole your house and your ex wife (who is barely older than your son, which is disgusting in its own way) is fucking her music teacher and has never been happier because she is finally rid of you

#ooc//hiiii #an feels like being a bitch tdy lol #<- ooc: I didn't know he could be anything else lol #but I finally get to fulfill my dream of shit talking jan van dick to his face!#no one question why joost knows this #I reblogged this too the wrong account twice I'm gonna kms

i-only-have-two-problems

Jun 22

Your mustache is atrocious.

- @i-hate-my-son

ok well fuck you too

at least I didn't get embarrassed and outsmarted by a group of teenagers in front of all of my coworkers

#joost rp #joost van poel #six of crows #six of crows rp #grishaverse rp #ketterdam rp #grishaverse #soc #soc rp #hi moot!

i-only-have-two-problems

Jun 16

YOUVE NEVER HAD A MILKSHAKE????

i hope that you find one soon because they are very yummy and super good and nice

I’m not interested in drinking ice cream. I’m barely interested in ice cream.

saphhoandstrawberries

ur life must be sad man

i-only-have-two-problems

well we already know that(I hear he counts down the days waiting until the wraith comes back)

SweetDream.ai • Live Cam

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

i-only-have-two-problems

Jun 16

Hi Kazakstan

Kazoo

AlaKAZam

Not even a little bit.

inedibleplastic

Which one do you like best tho

My name.

inedibleplastic

But if you had to choose… out of the three…

i-only-have-two-problems

what about emo horse boy?

#I was originally going to post this on my main account but I thought it would be funnier here

i-only-have-two-problems

Jun 12

QOTD // question of the day #6

What's something no one else knows about you?

@kazgr @captainghafaofthewraith @gunslingerofthebarrell @ninagirlkisserzenik @loveofthes-n @ajathesqualler @coolestcrowinketterdam @i-only-have-two-problems @the-safin-sister @verlesandpearls @blazinginferni

i-only-have-two-problems

I would say, but I don't know if the other guards have Tumblr, and I am not giving them anymore ammunition against me

#ketterdam rp #six of crows #six of crows rp #grishaverse #grishaverse rp #joost van poel #joost rp

Joost Van Poel @i-only-have-two-problems - Tumblr Blog | Tumlook