skye ⭑

❝ tracklist ❞  ─── joyride—cortis ❦ lullaby—cortis ❦ wassup—cortis ❦ polaroid love—enha ❦ kidult—svt ❦ our summer—txt ❦ youth—skz ❦ turbulence—atz ❦ time of our life—day6

the quiet before midnight felt heavy with light, if light could ever have weight.

it was the kind of air that settled over your skin like warm silk, humid and sweet with late summer, smelling faintly of cut grass from the neighbourhood park and the metallic tang of sparklers stacked in cardboard boxes near your feet. the rooftop of your dorm building near your company’s practice studios was far from glamorous. the concrete was cracked around the drainpipe, worn smooth in patches where many people before you had probably sat staring up at the city skyline hoping for something to give, but tonight, under a canopy of deep indigo and soft haze, it felt like the safest place in the world.

you were leaning against the chest-high brick ledge, your oversized knit cardigan slipping off one shoulder. juhoon was sitting right beside you, his legs dangling casually over the edge, swinging back and forth in a lazy, unhurried rhythm. he had his chin rested on his folded arms, his soft wavy hair flopping into his eyes every time the light breeze picked up.

“you’re gonna fall,” you murmured softly, not even turning your head to look at him, but reaching out a hand instinctively to grab the loop of his jeans’ belt.

he hummed, a lazy, chest-deep sound that carried more comfort than words ever could. he didn’t move away; instead, he leaned his shoulder slightly into your side, a solid, grounding presence that had been your anchor for as long as you could remember. “if i fall, you’ll catch me. or you’ll come down with me. either way, i won’t be alone.”

“i’d probably let go half way down just to teach you a lesson,” you replied, though your fingers tightened around the denim fabric, completely betraying your words.

juhoon let out a breathy laugh, turning his head so his cheek rested against his arm, eyes crinkling at the corners as he looked up at you. “liar. you cried when i stubbed my toe on the coffee table last week.”

“that was because you dropped my cereal, jju, not because of your toe.”

“details,” he mumbled, closing his eyes contentedly as the soft breeze blew over your heads.

behind the two of you, the rest of the rooftop was a chaotic mess of hushed giggles, rustling paper bags, and the metallic clinking of sodas being arranged in a cooler that juhoon had previously dragged up five flights of stairs.

seonghyeon was crouching by the cardboard box of fireworks they had managed to secure, treating each small paper-wrapped fuse as if it were an ancient artifact. keonho was right beside him, holding up his phone flashlight so seonghyeon could read the tiny korean instructions, his low voice occasionally breaking into quiet chuckles whenever seonghyeon accidentally pointed a roman candle at his own shoe.

“if you blow up the roof before midnight, i’m telling manager-nim it was your idea,” martin warned, sitting cross-legged on a worn picnic blanket they’d stolen from the dorm lounge. he was carefully unboxing small cupcakes topped with pastel icing, sticking a single metallic candle into the centre of each one.

“it won’t blow up,” seonghyeon insisted, though his fingers trembled just a bit with excitement as he straightened the fuses. “these are the gentle ones. the shop owner swore they look like falling stars.”

“falling stars or exploding trees?” keonho teasingly chimed in, flicking the back of seonghyeon’s ear with his almost healed hand before ducking away to avoid a playful swipe.

you listened to their voices blend into the night—the familiar, comforting background noise of your life for the past year. three hundred and sixty five days since the six of you stood under blinding stage lights for the first time, hearts hammering against your ribs, clutching each other’s hands so tightly your fingers went numb.

it didn’t feel real that a whole year had passed. a year filled with endless practice sessions that stretched into dawn, shared bowls of instant ramen eaten in complete silence because everyone was too tired to chew, soft tears shed in practice room corners when the pressure became too heavy, and moments like this—quiet, beautiful, hidden away from the rest of the world.

a soft footstep sounded on the gravel behind you, slow and deliberate, and before you even turned around, you knew who it was.

james settled into the space right next to you on your other side. he leaned back against the ledge, his elbows resting on the concrete, mirroring your posture. he was wearing a simple white t-shirt and loose black trousers, his blond hair catching the faint orange glow of the distant streetlights. he looked impossibly soft in the low light, the sharp angles of his bare face softened by the quiet warmth in his dark eyes.

he didn’t say anything at first. he just looked out at the city lights stretching toward the horizon, then slowly shifted his gaze to you.

“you cold?” james asked softly, his voice a low, gravelly whisper meant only for your ears.

you shook your head slightly, pulling the edges of your cardigan a bit closer around your front. “nah. the air’s nice tonight.”

“your hands are always cold,” he noted, his lips curving into a subtle, tender smile that made your pulse do a tiny, traitorous flutter against your ribs.

before you could answer, he reached into the pocket of his hoodie—which was currently draped over the ledge—and pulled out a small heat pack. he took your left hand in his, his warm palm cupping yours with a gentleness that always took your breath away. he slid the small warm packet into your fingers, closing your hand around it, his thumb lightly brushing across the knuckles of your fingers before he let go.

it was a tiny gesture, simple and unhurried, but the lingering warmth of his touch stayed on your skin long after his hand had pulled away.

you glanced up at him, meeting his eyes. there was something so quiet and intense in the way james looked at you—a soft, unspoken language built over many months of shared looks across crowded waiting rooms, quiet hand squeezes before entering stage doors, and late-night talks on the dorm balcony when neither of you could sleep. he never had to say the words out loud; they lived in the way he always positioned himself between you and the crowd, the way he saved the last bite of his favorite dessert for you, the way his eyes always found yours first whenever something good happened.

“thank you,” you murmured, your voice barely louder than the breeze.

james just smiled, a soft, secret thing meant only for you, and leaned his shoulder subtly against yours.

“hey, lovebirds and philosophic thinkers, get over here! it’s almost time!” martin’s voice called out, hushed but bursting with restrained excitement from the centre of the roof.

juhoon sat up straight, stretching his arms high above his head with a long groan—his hoodie rode up, which you yanked down quickly as he laughed at your actions—before swinging his legs back over the ledge onto the roof floor. he turned to you, offering both of his hands with a wide, fond grin. “up you get, yn. four minutes to midnight.”

you laughed, taking juhoon’s hands and letting him pull you up to your feet in one swift motion. he kept an arm loosely draped over your shoulders, pulling you into his side for a brief, tight squeeze—purely affectionate, purely comforting, the kind of embrace that reminded you that no matter how terrifying the world got, juhoon was always like your younger brother, your shield, your home.

“ready for year two?” he whispered into the crown of your hair, his voice laced with a sweet, protective warmth.

“only if you promise not to steal my socks anymore,” you whispered back, leaning your head against his shoulder for a second.

“no promises,” he giggled, ruffling your hair before walking over to help seonghyeon and keonho set up the main box of fireworks in the centre of the open space.

you walked over to where the group was gathering, james stepping close beside you, his arm lightly brushing yours with every step.

martin had lit the six tiny candles on the cupcakes arranged in a circle. the small yellow flames flickered against the dark, illuminating everyone’s faces—seonghyeon’s wide, excited eyes; keonho’s smile that showed off all 32 teeth; martin’s proud, emotional smile; juhoon’s fond, easygoing gaze; and james, standing right next to you, his eyes reflecting the soft candlelight as he looked down at you.

“okay, check your phones,” keonho whispered, holding up his screen. “it’s 11:59.”

a collective hush fell over the six of you. the whole city seemed to quiet down in that single minute, as if the universe itself was holding its breath just for cortis.

one year.

one year of sweat, tears, music, late nights, early mornings, fear, joy, and an unshakable love that had bound the six of you together into something far bigger than just a group. you were family.

“thirty seconds,” seonghyeon said, his voice trembling slightly with emotion as he held the long lighter near the main firework fuse.

juhoon stepped up beside you on one side, wrapping his hand around your elbow with a reassuring squeeze. james stepped up on your other side, his hand dropping down to lightly brush against yours before his fingers delicately slid into the gaps between yours, holding your hand in a soft, hidden clasp behind the folds of your oversized cardigan.

your heart skipped a beat, warmth blooming from your chest all the way to your fingertips. you squeezed james’ hand back softly, feeling his grip tighten just a little in response, grounding you completely.

“ten!” martin started the count, his voice rising in a happy, excited whisper.

“nine!” keonho joined in, grinning from ear to ear.

“eight!” juhoon shouted quietly, throwing his free arm around seonghyeon’s shoulders. “seven!”

“six!” you yelled along with them, laughter bubbling up in your throat, sweet and effortless. “five!”

“four!” james’ voice was soft right beside your ear, rich and warm, his thumb caressing the back of your hand. “three”

“two!” seonghyeon chimed in, smiling wide.

“one! happy anniversary!” you all whisper-yelled together. “cortis fighting!”

seonghyeon sparked the lighter, catching the fuse just as the phone clocks hit midnight on august 18, 2026.

a tiny hiss of golden sparks erupted from the centre box, shooting straight up into the dark sky before bursting into a quiet, brilliant shower of pastel lights—soft pinks, dreamlike blues, and glowing silver stars that floated down like burning snow. another one followed immediately after, a gentle thump... pop filling the air, painting the clouds in shades of soft gold and lavender.

the roof erupted into soft cheers and laughter. martin immediately threw his arms around keonho and seonghyeon, while juhoon wrapped both of james and you into a massive, clumsy group hug, laughing loudly against the backdrop of the crackling sparks.

“we made it,” juhoon cheered into your hair, rocking you back and forth affectionately. “a whole year. we didn’t die! and we didn’t break anything!”

“speak for yourself, you broke three plates last week. and look at keonho’s hands, dude,” seonghyeon laughed, joining the hug and suffocating all of you in a mass of arms and oversized hoodies.

through the chaos of the group hug, as fireworks continued to light up the night sky in gentle, twinkling bursts of silver and gold, you felt james’ hand slide gently up your arm, his fingers lingering on your wrist before settling on your waist to balance you amidst juhoon’s swaying.

you turned your face slightly to look at him through the glowing light of the fireworks. james was already looking at you, completely ignoring the brilliant display in the sky above. the soft pink and lavender light reflected in his eyes, catching the tender, delicate smile on his lips.

he bent his head down slightly, his lips hovering near your temple, his breath warm against your cool skin as the sparks whistled softly in the air.

“happy one year,” james whispered, his voice soft like an angel’s wish, meant only for you to hear. “here’s to forever. with the boys. and with you.”

you smiled, leaning your head softly against his shoulder as martin and keonho’s warm laughter rang out, the fireworks painting the night in endless, beautiful light.

the group hug dissolved slowly into a messy pile of limbs and shared laughter on the worn picnic blanket, the quiet crackle of the last remaining sparklers leaving faint trails of sweet smoke in the cooling night air.

martin immediately pulled out a big insulated cool bag he’d been hiding behind the cooler with a triumphant grin. “you guys didn’t think i brought just cupcakes, right?”

from the depths of the bag, he pulled out three large tubs of acai ice cream, completely loaded with frozen blueberries, sliced strawberries, coconut flakes, and generous drippings of honey.

“martin, you’re officially promoted to my favorite member,” seonghyeon gasped, swooping in with a bunch of plastic spoons he pulled straight out of his hoodie pocket like a magician.

“hey! i carried the cooler up five flights!” juhoon protested, poking seonghyeon’s arm playfully before dropping down onto the blanket right next to you. he didn’t even bother grab a spoon for himself at first; instead, he reached over, unceremoniously scooped a strawberry slice covered in dark purple acai with his bare fingers, and popped it into his mouth with a ridiculous expression of sheer bliss.

“you’re disgusting, kim juhoon,” you giggled, swatting his shoulder as you grabbed a spoon from keonho.

“i’m efficient, princess,” he corrected with a cheeky, mouth-full grin, leaning his side against yours so heavily you almost tipped over into the blanket.

james sat down right on your other side, his long legs crossed comfortably. he reached out and took a tub of acai, carefully using his spoon to gather a perfectly balanced bite—a mix of soft acai, coconut flakes, and a crisp blueberry—before holding it out toward you.

“here,” he murmured softly, his dark eyes sparkling under the faint rooftop strings of fairy lights keonho had turned on. “try this bite, it has all the coconut.”

you looked at him, feeling that familiar, delicate warmth curl up in your chest. you leaned in and took the bite straight from his spoon, the cold, sweet tartness of the berry bursting on your tongue. “oh damn, it’s so good,” you breathed out, smiling up at him.

james’ lips curved into that slow, sweet, impossibly tender smile that always made time feel like it was moving in slow motion while lana del rey played in the background. he reached up with his thumb and gently brushed away a speck of stray coconut from the corner of your lip, his thumb lingering against your skin for a second longer than necessary before he drew his hand back to lick it off, his eyes soft and fixed on yours.

“save some for the rest of us, lovebirds!” seonghyeon teased around a massive bite of acai, though his cheeks were puffed out like a squirrel’s and he was grinning too wide for the jab to carry any real bite.

you ducked your head with a tiny, embarrassed laugh, feeling the heat rise to your cheeks. beside you, james just let out a quiet, velvety chuckle, his knees brushing against yours under the blanket as he casually scooped another bite for himself.

for a while, the rooftop was filled only with the soft sounds of plastic spoons scraping against cardboard tubs, hushed giggles over keonho accidentally dropping a blueberry down his shirt, and the gentle, humming stillness of the city late at night.

juhoon was sitting quietly next to you, chewing slowly on a piece of granola. he had gone unusually quiet, his eyes staring blankly at the empty sparkler sticks sticking out of the box near the edge of the blanket.

you noticed the shift in his energy immediately. “jju?” you whispered, nudging his knee with yours. “you okay?”

he turned his head to look at you. the faint light caught the gloss in his dark eyes, and you realised with a sudden, soft tug at your heart that his eyes were brimming with unshed tears.

“i was just thinking... about the basement,” he said, his voice dropping into a small, thick whisper that cracked just a little on the last word. “remember... last winter? when the heater in our practice room broke, and we only had one heavy coat between the six of us?”

a soft, tender silence fell over your side of the blanket as the memory washed over you.

“we shared that stupid red coat,” you remembered quietly, a soft, melancholy smile touching your lips. “we sat on the cold floor in a circle for two hours waiting for the repairman, singing harmonies just to keep our jaws from shivering.”

“and you cried because your toes were numb,” juhoon whispered, a watery giggle escaping him as a single tear finally spilled over his eyelash and tracked down his cheek. he quickly wiped it away with the back of his sleeve, looking down at his hands in his lap. “i was so scared back then. every single day, i thought... ‘what if we never make it out of that basement?’ or ‘what if nobody ever hears us?’” he turned his head to face you fully, his lower lip trembling just a tiny bit, looking so small and vulnerable despite his broad frame. “i’m just... i’m so glad it was you guys. i’m so glad i get to be here with you.”

seeing juhoon look at you with such raw, unfiltered gratitude proved too much for your own emotions to hold out. a sudden wave of warmth and overwhelming love hit your chest, and your eyes filled with heat. a quiet sob hiccuped out of your throat before you could stop it, and tears began to spill down your cheeks, wet and silent.

“don’t make me cry, juhoon, i swear to god,” you choked out through a laugh, reaching out to slap his knee weakly.

“you’re already crying!” he sniffled, immediately pulling you into a tight, fierce hug, burying his face into the crook of your neck. his arms wrapped around you with all the protective, clumsy strength he had, holding you like you were the most precious thing in the world.

you wrapped your arms tight around his shoulders, burying your face into his cardigan, both of you letting out quiet, watery giggles mixed with soft sniffling. it wasn’t sad tears—it was the pure, heavy relief of having survived the storm together, of knowing that no matter how hard the road had been, neither of you had ever let go of the other’s hand.

“look at you two,” martin murmured softly, his own eyes glistening as he watched the two of you, though he kept a playful smile on his face to keep the mood light. “crybabies.”

“shut up, martin,” juhoon mumbled into your shoulder, though there was zero hostility in his voice. he pulled back just enough to look at you, his hands cupping your cheeks gently, using his thumbs to wipe away the tears streaming down your face. “look at your nose, it’s so red.”

“yours is redder,” you sniffled, laughing wetly as you wiped a stray tear off his jaw with your cardigan sleeve. “you look like a reindeer.”

“a handsome reindeer,” he corrected softly, his broad, endearing grin returning as he leaned his forehead gently against yours for a quiet second. “thank you for sticking with me. really.”

“always,” you whispered back, squeezing his arm firmly. “always, juhoon.”

as he let you go to wipe his face with a paper napkin keonho handed him, you felt a warm, sturdy hand settle softly on the small of your back.

you turned around to see james sitting close, his face etched with such quiet, overwhelming devotion it made your breath catch. he held a soft cotton handkerchief he’d pulled from his pocket.

without saying a word, he leaned in closer. his fingers gently tilted your chin up, his touch impossibly tender, as he carefully dabbed away the fresh wetness beneath your eyes and along your cheeks. he worked so gently, as if he were handling delicate glass, his dark eyes searching yours with an intensity that felt like a quiet confession.

“all cried out?” he murmured, his thumb brushing over your lower lip, catching a small tear that had caught there.

“i think so,” you whispered, your voice still a little shaky, a soft chuckle bubbling up from your chest.

james let out a small, breathless hum, his hand staying cupped around the side of your jaw, his thumb softly stroking your cheekbone. he didn’t pull away, even after your face was dry. he just looked at you under the flickering rooftop lights, his gaze soft, deep, and holding a world of unspoken promises for the years ahead.

“good,” he murmured, his voice soft like a lullaby as he leaned down and pressed a long, sweet, lingering kiss to your forehead, right between your eyes. “because we have a lot more years to celebrate, and i don’t want you dehydrating already.”

the rest of the boys laughed softly as you hid your blushing face against james’ shoulder, his arms wrapping around you to keep you warm against the midnight air, holding you tight while keonho reached over to steal another mouthful of acai ice cream from your tub.

corporate management probably would have had a collective heart attack if they could see the six of you now, piled together on a half-deflated picnic blanket on a drafty rooftop, surrounded by sticky plastic spoons, half-eaten containers of melted acai ice cream, and three different brands of convenience store wet wipes.

keonho had somehow managed to get a stray blueberry stuck to the back of his grey hoodie, a fact that seonghyeon discovered only after accidentally sitting on it with full force.

“you squished it into the fabric!” keonho whined, twisting around in circles like a dog trying to catch its own tail as he tried to inspect the dark purple smudge near his shoulder blade. “this was my favorite sweater! it’s imported!”

“you’re the one who left food on your spine,” seonghyeon replied with absolute deadpan precision, not even looking up as he used a wet wipe to meticulously polish his tiny portable speaker. “it’s basic anatomy, bro. food goes in the mouth, not in between the shoulder blades.”

martin let out a high-pitched, wheezing laugh, leaning back so hard he nearly rolled straight off the picnic blanket into juhoon’s lap. “imported from where? the clearance rack at the metro station?”

“it was a gift from my sister!” keonho defended loudly, though his cheeks flushed a brilliant pink as he finally gave up on reaching the spot and flopped sideways onto the blanket, dramatic and defeated, resting his head right across seonghyeon’s knees.

seonghyeon didn’t even flinch. without breaking his rhythm of cleaning the speaker, his fingers automatically reached down to push keonho’s soft, messy bangs out of his eyes, his touch absentmindedly fond despite his sharp words.

juhoon, who was still recovering from his earlier crying spell, let out a wet, raspy snort into his cardigan sleeve before reaching over to yank a handful of coconut flakes out of the last remaining tub. he looked over at you, his eyes still slightly rimmed with red, but his smile was radiant—the kind of open, golden smile that made every single hardship over the past year feel entirely worth it.

“hey,” juhoon nudged your side with his elbow, his tone shifting into that rare, mischievous register that always meant trouble. “remember when martin tried to write our first intro speech and accidentally translated ‘we will capture your hearts’ as ‘we will harvest your organs’?”

“oh my god, do not bring that up,” martin groaned instantly, burying his face in his hands while keonho erupted into fresh, breathless giggles from seonghyeon’s lap.

“he practiced it in front of the mirror for three hours!” juhoon continued, leaning his entire body weight into your shoulder as he laughed, his cheek pressing warm against your arm. “he was standing there looking all sleek and handsome in his suit, saying ‘hello, we are cortis! and we are here to harvest your organs!’ with the most intense eye contact!”

“i was nervous!” martin protested, though he was laughing so hard his shoulders were shaking. he picked up a small paper napkin, balled it up, and threw it accurately at juhoon’s head. “the machine translation lied to me. korean is not my first language, i’m canadian!”

you burst out laughing, the sound ringing bright and clear in the cool night air. juhoon caught a paper ball easily, tossing it up and down like a tennis ball before dropping his head onto your shoulder, resting his heavy chin right on your collarbone.

“you’re heavy,” you murmured, reaching up with one hand to fondly ruffle the thick, soft dark locks at the nape of his neck.

“i’m your favorite,” he mumbled back smoothly, closing his eyes and letting his weight settle completely against you. it was entirely comfortable, and warm—the kind of physical affection that came naturally between two people who had spent endless hours leaning on each other through sheer exhaustion in dark practice rooms. he was your anchor, your brother in every sense that mattered, and having him so close felt as natural as breathing.

from your other side, james shifted slightly.

he had been quiet for the last few minutes, just listening to the banter with that quiet, protective contentment that settled over him whenever all six of you were together. but as juhoon rested his head on your shoulder, james’ gaze drifted down to where your hand was resting on your knee.

slowly, without interrupting the chaotic conversation happening between martin, keonho, and seonghyeon, he reached out. his long, warm fingers slid over yours, his index finger tracing a slow, soothing pattern over the back of your hand before his palm closed over yours completely.

the contrast between the quiet comfort of juhoon’s weight on your left shoulder and the subtle, warmth of james’ hand wrapping around yours on your right made your heart do a sudden, fluttering leap against your ribcage.

james gave your hand a soft, deliberate squeeze, his thumb stroking the sensitive skin of your wrist.

“you’re getting cold again,” he whispered, his voice a smooth, quiet rumble that was completely lost under the sound of martin and keonho now arguing over who got the last bite of cupcake.

juhoon must have felt the shift in your posture, or maybe he just recognised the quiet stillness that always fell between james and you. he opened one eye, looked up at your face, then cast a cheeky, knowing glance over at james’ hand holding yours. he let out a soft, amused hum, casually pushing himself up off your shoulder with an exaggerated stretch.

“i’m gonna go harass seonghyeon for the aux cord,” he announced loudly, giving your shoulder one last affectionate pat before crawling across the blanket on his hands and knees to tackle seonghyeon into a headlock.

“get off me, you giant turtle!” seonghyeon squawked, instantly losing his cool composure as juhoon began furiously ruffling his previously styled hair.

with juhoon joining the chaos on the other side of the rooftop, the space immediately beside you felt suddenly open, private, and breathtakingly quiet. james shifted closer. the cool midnight air blew across the rooftop, making the hem of your cardigan flutter, but where james sat beside you, it felt like a haven of absolute warmth. he moved his arm behind you, letting his hand rest lightly against your waist, pulling you just an inch closer so that your shoulders aligned.

“better?” james asked softly, his dark eyes searching yours in the faint, dreamy glow of the overhead fairy lights.

“you just wanna make sure we’re touching all the time,” you murmured, your voice barely louder than a whisper.

his hand at your waist felt solid and steady. he looked down at your face, his eyes lingering on your cheeks, which were still slightly flushed from the cold and the residual warmth of your tears earlier. his expression was so tender, so completely unshielded, that it made your breath catch in your throat.

“you worked so hard this year,” he said softly. it wasn’t a boast, or a grand statement—it was just a quiet, simple truth spoken from the bottom of his heart. he reached up with his free hand, his fingers delicately tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear, his knuckles lingering against your cheekbone. “every single day... you were amazing. i don’t think i ever told you that enough.”

“james...” your voice trembled just a little, the sincerity in his eyes making a sweet, heavy warmth flood your entire chest. “we all worked hard. you did, too.”

“i know,” he whispered, his lips curving into a small, impossibly soft smile that made his whole face light up. “but watching you... it made me want to be better. every time i felt like giving up, i just looked at you.” he tilted his head slightly, his gaze dropping down to your lips for a fleeting second before rising back to meet your eyes, asking a silent, hesitant question that made your pulse race in your ears.

the rest of the rooftop seemed to completely melt away into soft background noise—the distant sound of traffic below, the quiet crackle of the city, the hushed giggles of the boys playing music from the portable speaker. in this tiny, hidden corner of the world, on august 18th, it was just the two of you.

you didn’t say anything. instead, you leaned in just a fraction of an inch, closing the tiny distance between you. his breath hitched softly. his hand at your waist tightened, gentle but firm, drawing you in as he bent his head down.

when his lips met yours, it was like the entire universe slowed to a quiet, breathless standstill.

the kiss was sweet, lingering, and impossibly soft—a delicate mix of acai, cold night air, and months upon months of feelings finally finding a place to land. it wasn’t hurried or intense; it felt like a promise made in secret, an angel’s wish whispered directly into the quiet of the night. his lips pressed against yours with a tender reverence that made your hand reach up instinctively to rest against his chest, feeling the steady, rapid thudding of his heart beneath the soft cotton of his shirt.

james murmured something soft against your mouth—a gentle, breathless sound of pure contentment—before deepening the kiss just a fraction, his thumb softly stroking your jawline as he held you close. every nerve in your body seemed to hum with a quiet, beautiful warmth, the kind that made you feel completely safe, completely cherished, and entirely home.

when he slowly pulled back, his forehead rested gently against yours. his eyes were still half-closed, a sweet, dazed smile gracing his lips, his breath brushing warm against your skin.

“happy anniversary,” he whispered, his voice rich and thick with an emotion so deep it made your heart ache in the best possible way.

“happy anniversary, pretty boy,” you breathed back, a shy, radiant smile spreading across your face.

“hey! are you two making out behind the cupcake boxes?!” martin’s loud, scandalised shout suddenly pierced through the air, completely shattering the dreamlike quiet.

you instantly pulled back with a startled giggle, your face flushing a deep, vivid crimson as you looked over.

keonho was already standing up on the picnic blanket, pointing an accusatory spoon straight at the two of you, his eyes wide in mock horror while seonghyeon tried to pull him back down by his belt loops.

“i knew it!” keonho gasped, dramatic as always, covering his eyes with both hands. “my innocent eyes! on our anniversary too!”

“keonho, sit down and eat your ice cream,” juhoon laughed, though he was shaking his head with a fond, knowing smile as he looked at the two of you. “let them be.”

james didn’t look flustered at all. in fact, he just let out a quiet chuckle, his arm staying securely wrapped around your waist as he pulled you closer into his side, completely unbothered by the teasing. he looked down at you, his dark eyes sparkling with a secret, beautiful light, his thumb lightly stroking your hip through your cardigan.

“ignore the yappatron 3000s,” he joked into your hair, pressing one last soft, lingering kiss to the side of your head as the music from the speaker finally kicked in—a personal, softer version of joyride that martin, seonghyeon and you had mixed one day, floating up into the starry midnight sky, wrapping all six of you in its quiet magic.

ooh, ooh, ooh 갇혀 이 건물 속에 밤새 no sun, no sky, 얼굴은 창백 all day 미쳐 난 flipping 마치 fried eggs, pancakes bloodshot eyes tonight, 도망가 여길 벗어나

‘cause, ooh 우리는 꿈꿔왔지 찰나의 해방 달려 부릉 트렁크에다 콜라 채워, 얼른 밟아 그 pedal (yeah)

이 자릴 떠 지도는 집어치워 ‘cause we’re on a joyride 더 세게 speed it up, 지금 기분 so high driving so fast, 가로질러 긴 밤 day to night, ride, we’re on a joyride yeah, yeah, yeah, we’re on a joyride yeah, yeah, yeah, we’re on a joyride driving so fast, 가로질러 긴 밤 day to night, ride, we’re on a joyride

범생이는 나의 past tense 학교는 찍먹 아지트로 came back 인생이 폭풍이면 난 내 drip 아래 춰 rain dance 종일 뛰었었지 폭주는 내 personality 마치 mj, ever since ‘23 rat snakes, 담을 넘었지

‘cause, ooh 우리는 꿈꿔왔지 찰나의 해방 달려 부릉 트렁크에다 콜라 채워, 얼른 밟아 그 pedal (yeah)

the rooftop slowly faded back into its quiet, nighttime stillness as the music from the portable speaker reached its final, gentle fade-out.

이 자릴 떠 지도는 집어치워 ‘cause we’re on a joyride 더 세게 speed it up, 지금 기분 so high driving so fast, 가로질러 긴 밤 day to night, ride, we’re on a joyride yeah, yeah, yeah, we’re on a joyride yeah, yeah, yeah, we’re on a joyride driving so fast, 가로질러 긴 밤 day to night, ride, we’re on a joyride

the cool august breeze was picking up, carrying away the last faint wisps of smoke from the fireworks. keonho was already half-asleep, slumped against seonghyeon’s shoulder while seonghyeon quietly packed away the unused sparklers and folded the blanket around them. juhoon had gathered the empty tubs of ice cream into a plastic bag, dragging his feet in a sleepy, contented haze as james guided him toward the stairwell door, their hushed voices trailing down the concrete steps.

you stayed behind with martin, kneeling on the cool floor near the edge of the ledge with a brown paper trash bag stretched open between the two of you.

“you don'’ have to stay up and help, you know,” martin murmured, his voice soft and raspy from laughing all night. he reached out to gather the stray paper napkins, his movement slow and deliberate as he tossed them into the bag you were holding. “you look exhausted.”

“i’m fine,” you said quietly, offering him a gentle smile as you picked up a few empty candle holders. “plus, if i leave you up here alone, you’ll probably end up stargazing until three in the morning and miss morning practice.”

he let out a small, breathy laugh, shaking his head. “fair point. you know me too well.”

for a couple of minutes, the two of you worked in a comfortable, rhythmic silence. the sound of distant city traffic hummed far below, a steady, low tide of sound that felt almost comforting. but as martin tied off the top of the first trash bag, his hands slowed down, his eyes lingering on the skyline where the city lights met the deep blue of the sky.

“hey,” martin spoke up, his voice dropping into a tone that was far quieter, far more vulnerable than his usual cheerful demeanor. “can i tell you something?”

you stopped what you were doing, setting down a plastic spoon, and turned to look at him completely. “yeah, mars, of course. what’s on your mind?”

he sat back on his heels, pulling his knees up to his chest and resting his arms over them. he looked small like that, stripped of his usual leader-like composure and energetic humour. the faint glow of the streetlights caught the reflective gloss in his eyes.

“i was really scared this year,” he whispered, staring at his shoes. “like... fucking terrified. every time we stepped onto a stage, or every time a chart dropped, or every time someone asked me if we were ready... i felt like i was wearing a suit that was three sizes too big for me.” he let out a quiet, self-deprecating chuckle, though there was no humour in it. “as the leader, as the one who’s supposed to hold everyone together... i kept thinking, what if i make a mistake? what if i mess up a speech, or lose my voice, or fail to protect you guys when things get hard? what if i’m not enough to keep cortis standing?”

a quiet, heavy ache settled in your chest as you listened to him. martin had spent the last three hundred and sixty-five days being everyone’s rock—organising schedules, offering a quiet comfort to james and you when you were homesick, keeping juhoon, seonghyeon and keonho grounded, translating speeches, and always, always making sure everyone else ate first. you had seen how heavy that weight was on his shoulders, even when he tried his hardest to hide it behind jokes and easy smiles.

without hesitation, you shifted over on the concrete, sitting cross-legged right beside him. you reached out and placed your hand firmly on his forearm, giving it a grounding, reassuring squeeze.

“martin,” you said, your voice steady, soft, and absolute. “look at me.” he hesitated for a second before turning his head to look at you. “you are the reason we made it to today,” you told him, staring straight into his eyes so he could see every ounce of sincerity in your words. “not just because you’re a great leader, but because you’re you. you carry so much for all six of us combined, and you never ask for anything in return. but you don’t have to carry it alone. you never had to.” his breath hitched, his lower lip trembling just a fraction as your words sank in. “you don’t need to be perfect to keep us standing,” you continued gently, your hand moving up to rest warmly against his upper arm. “we don’t stand because you’re invincible, martin. we stand because we’re holding onto each other. juhoon, seonghyeon, keonho, james, and me—we’re here to hold you up, too. you’re allowed to be tired. you’re allowed to be scared.”

a single, quiet tear slipped from his eye, catching the light as it tracked down his cheek. he quickly let out a breathless, watery laugh, ducking his head down to wipe his face on his knee.

“i promised myself i wouldn’t cry tonight,” he mumbled, his voice thick with emotion. “juhoon already stole the crying spot.”

“there’s plenty of room for both of you,” you giggled softly, leaning your head gently against his arm. “you worked so hard, martin. truly. thank you for taking such good care of us.”

he let out a long, shuddering breath, the tension that he’d been holding in his shoulders for months finally melting away completely. he leaned his head sideways, resting it against yours, his side warm and solid against yours.

“thank you, yn,” he whispered, his voice full of a deep, quiet relief. “i really needed to hear that tonight.”

“i know,” you murmured back softly. “that’s why i stayed behind.”

the two of you sat there for a long moment, watching the faint clouds drift across the dark sky, wrapped in a peaceful, healing silence. the fear and pressure that had weighed on both of your shoulders all year felt lighter now, dissolved in the cool night air and shared understanding.

after a few minutes, martin straightened up, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand and giving you a warm, genuine smile—the kind that reached all the way to his eyes, free of any unspoken worries.

“okay,” he said, his usual bright energy returning in a gentle way as he stood up and offered you his hand. “let’s finish cleaning this up before james comes back up here to check if i kidnapped you.”

you laughed, taking his hand and letting him pull you up to your feet. “he wouldn’t think that.”

“oh, he definitely would,” martin teased playfully, grabbing the tied trash bag in one hand while you picked up the remaining cooler. “the way he was looking at you tonight? if i keep you up here five minutes longer, he’ll stage a rescue mission.”

you felt a warm flush creep up your neck at the mention of james, ducking your head to hide your smile as martin swung his arm over your shoulder, walking with you toward the stairwell door.

“happy anniversary, martin,” you said softly as he pushed the heavy door open for you.

“happy anniversary, sweetheart,” he smiled back, his grip on your shoulder tightening in a warm, protective squeeze as you both headed down the quiet, lit stairs toward the dorms. “here’s to many more.”

the stairwell was cool and quiet as martin and you carried the last of the trash bags and the cooler down to the dorm floor.

just outside the apartment door, sitting side by side on the floor with their backs against the wall, were seonghyeon and keonho. keonho was practically asleep, his chin tucked into the collar of his loose hoodie, while seonghyeon was idly picking at a loose thread on his jeans, looking up the moment the stairwell door clicked open.

“you guys took forever,” seonghyeon said, his voice raspy with late-night fatigue. “we were supposed to go inside, but keonho fell asleep standing up while trying to take off his shoes and waiting for you both.”

“i was not,” keonho mumbled instantly without opening his eyes, his voice slurred and heavy with sleep. “i was... inspecting my socks.”

martin chuckled warmly, setting down the cooler near the shoe rack. “i’m going to take these trash bags to the chute down the hall. don’t let keonho sleep on the floorboards, he’ll complain about his back tomorrow.”

“i’ll watch them,” you offered with a small smile, walking over as martin headed down the hallway.

you crouched down in front of the two younger boys. as a soon to be twenty-year-old, having two seventeen-year-olds in the group meant you had spent the entire year watching over them like a protective big sister. you’d made sure they ate proper meals instead of just eating ramyeon, helped them take their minds off the stress between music show recordings, and held their hands when the overwhelming scale of their dreams made them feel small.

“hey guys,” you whispered, reaching out to gently nudge keonho’s knee. “bedtime. come on.”

keonho slowly opened his eyes, blinking up at you like a sleepy puppy. he leaned his head sideways, resting it heavily against your shoulder as you sat down on the floor beside them. “can we just stay here for five minutes? the dorm’s too warm.”

“it’s cool out here,” seonghyeon agreed quietly, pulling his knees up to his chest. he was usually the quietest of the group, mature beyond his age, but tonight, under the soft hall light, he just looked like the young boy he was.

you wrapped one arm around keonho’s shoulders, pulling him closer into your side, while using your free hand to gently ruffle seonghyeon’s hair.

“you two did so amazing today,” you said softly, your voice full of genuine pride. “and all of this year. do you know how proud i am of you?”

seonghyeon leaned his head back against the wall, looking at you through his dark, soft bangs. “really? even when i mess up the choreography counts during rehearsals?”

“hyeon, you haven’t missed a count since march,” you said with a gentle laugh, nudging his knee with yours. “you work harder than anyone i know. you stay in the practice room until your shoes are soaked, and you never complain. but sometimes... you don’t have to carry so much weight on your own. you’re only a kid, and you’re allowed to just that with us.”

his expression softened, a subtle, vulnerable look crossing his face. he ducked his head, a faint, shy smile touching his lips. “i just... i didn’t want to hold anyone back. i felt like i had to catch up instantly so i wouldn’t ruin it for you guys.”

“you could never ruin it,” you said firmly, your hand moving to cup the back of his neck in a warm, grounding hold. “you’re the heart of our performance, seonghyeon. we wouldn’t be cortis without you. not ever.”

he let out a quiet, relieved breath, nodding softly against your hand. “thanks, short stuff.”

“short stuff? shut the fuck up!”

“nah, it’s funny!”

beside you, keonho let out a soft snort, his eyes still half-closed as he snuggled his face further into your cardigan. “what about me? am i the heart too?”

you couldn’t help the affectionate giggle that bubbled up from your chest. “you’re the chaos, keonho. but we’d be completely lost without you, too.”

“i’m the loud heart,” he corrected in a sleepy whisper, wrapping his long arms around your waist like a giant teddy bear. “i was really scared when we debuted, you know? i missed my mom so much. i used to cry in the bathroom stall during our first week of promotions so juhoon wouldn’t hear me.”

your heart gave a soft, tender ache at his confession. “why didn’t you go to anyone else?”

“i didn’t want anyone to worry,” he murmured, his grip around your waist tightening just a little. “james and you were already taking care of everyone else. but... every time you brought me hot tea before recording, or sat with me when i was nervous... it felt like home. you’re like my real sister, y’know.”

tears pricked at the corners of your eyes again, soft and sweet. you pressed a long, affectionate kiss to the top of keonho’s messy hair, then reached out to pull seonghyeon into the hug, wrapping both of them in a warm, protective embrace right there on the dorm hallway floor.

“i’ll always take care of you two,” you whispered into the quiet space between you three. “no matter how big cortis gets, no matter how many years pass... you’ll always be my little brothers. okay?”

“okay,” seonghyeon murmured back, burying his face into your shoulder for a brief, rare hug, letting himself be taken care of for once.

“okay,” keonho echoed with a contented sigh.

after a long moment, martin walked back down the hall, taking in the sight of the three of you piled together on the floor with a soft, fond smile. “all right, wrap it up, eomma,” he teased gently. “these two have extra choreo practice to pretend to do tomorrow.”

“i heard that,” keonho grumbled, though he finally let go of your waist and stretched his long arms over his head with a wide yawn.

you helped both of them up to their feet, smoothing down the back of seonghyeon’s shirt and patting keonho’s cheek gently. “go brush your teeth and get into bed. i’ll come check on you in ten minutes, and if anyone is still awake on their phone, i’m taking it away.”

“yes, drill sergeant,” seonghyeon grumbled with an obedient smile, grabbing keonho by the hood of his sweater to drag him through the dorm door.

“goodnight, yn! happy anniversary!” keonho called out drowsily over his shoulder before seonghyeon gently pulled the door shut behind them, leaving the hallway quiet and still once more.

the heavy front door clicked shut behind the younger boys, leaving the quiet hallway suspended in a cozy, ambient stillness. martin gave you a fond, tired nod before slipping into his own bedroom to finally crash for the night, leaving you standing alone near the kitchen island.

the apartment was bathed in the warm, dim glow of the under-cabinet nightlights. the faint, comforting hum of the refrigerator filled the room, accompanied by the low, rhythmic ticking of the wall clock.

you walked over to the sink to fill a glass with cool water, the floorboards faint and cool beneath your bare feet. before you could take a sip, a shadowy figure shuffled out from the hallway, dragging an oversized grey throw blanket behind him like a makeshift cape.

juhoon leaned his heavy frame against the edge of the marble counter, his eyes half-lidded, dark hair completely tousled into a messy bird's nest.

“you’re still up?” he mumbled, his voice thick with sleep. he reached out with a long, uncoordinated arm and plucked the water glass right out of your hand, taking a long, unhurried gulp before handing it back to you completely unbothered.

“that was my water, dumbass,” you whispered, though there was zero heat in your voice.

“our water,” he corrected smoothly, letting out a satisfied sigh as he wrapped the throw blanket tighter around his broad shoulders. he leaned his forehead gently against your shoulder, his weight light and familiar as he rested there for a quiet second. “my brain is still buzzing. i keep thinking about the fireworks.”

“they were really pretty,” you murmured, holding the glass as he leaned on you. “seonghyeon actually picked good ones.”

“yeah,” juhoon hummed, his chest vibrating against your arm. “a year ago today, we were all sitting on the floor in practice room a, eating cheap ice creams and staring at the ceiling because we were too terrified to sleep before our debut stage. remember?”

“i remember,” you smiled, looking down at your feet. “you dropped your ice cream on james’ white shoes and he didn’t even yell at you because he was too frozen with anxiety.”

juhoon let out a low, breathy giggle, his shoulders shaking against yours. “he looked like a ghost that whole morning. but then... the second we walked onto that stage, everything just clicked. because we had each other.”

he lifted his head, looking down at you with an expression so sweet and affectionate it warmed you from the inside out. he reached out, pulling a loose strand of hair out of your face and tucking it behind your ear, his large hand resting against the side of your neck for a brief, reassuring second—a silent, unspoken vow of protection that had existed between the two of you since day one.

“go to sleep, jju,” you whispered, leaning up on your tiptoes to hug him properly. “we have a long schedule tomorrow.”

“yeah, yeah,” he mumbled, a lazy, fond grin spreading across his face as he turned to walk down the dark corridor toward his room. “don’t stay up too late staring at james, okay? i need my beauty sleep and your quiet giggling will wake me up.”

“yah, kim juhoon!” you hissed, a bright blush exploding across your cheeks. he just let out a low, triumphant laugh and slipped through his bedroom door, pulling it shut with a quiet click. you shook your head, a lingering smile tugging at your lips as you turned back to the kitchen to wash your glass.

“he’s not entirely wrong, you know.”

the voice was gentle, rich, and closer than you expected.

you turned around to find james standing at the edge of the living room. he had changed out of his street clothes into a pair of oversized black cotton shorts and a thin white long-sleeved shirt that clung loosely to his frame. his blonde hair was damp, pushed back carelessly from his forehead, and his dark eyes were fixed on you with an unhurried, magnetic stillness.

the rest of the world felt miles away. the boys were all asleep in their rooms, the city outside was dark and resting, and in the quiet sanctuary of the living room, it was finally just the two of you.

james walked over slowly, his bare feet making no sound on the floorboards. he didn’t stop until he was standing directly in front of you, his comparatively taller frame blocking out the rest of the room. the subtle scent of sweet rain and soft cedar wood drifted off his skin, enveloping you completely.

without saying a word, he reached out. his long, slender fingers gently caught your wrist, his thumb tracing a slow, lingering circle over your pulse point before he pulled you gently away from the kitchen counter.

he led you over to the deep, plush sofa in the corner of the living room. he sat down first, leaning his back against the armrest and extending his long legs out over the cushions. then, with a subtle, wordless tug, he guided you down beside him. you shifted closer, curling your legs up onto the sofa and leaning back against his chest.

james let out a low, soft sigh of pure contentment—a sound that seemed to come from the very depths of his soul. he wrapped both arms around your waist, pulling you snugly back against him until there was no space left between you. he rested his chin in the crook of your neck, his warm breath fanning across your skin in steady, soothing waves.

“tired?” he whispered against your skin, his hands linking together over your stomach, his thumbs lightly caressing your waist through the soft knit of your sweater.

“a little,” you confessed quietly, letting your head fall back against his shoulder. “but i don’t want tonight to end.”

“it doesn’t have to,” he murmured, his voice a low, velvety melody in the dark. “we have tomorrow. and the day after that. and all the years after.”

he shifted slightly, pressing his lips softly to your check—a delicate, feather-light kiss that made a shiver of warmth run all the way down your spine. his touch was so careful, so full of reverence, as if you were something precious he had waited a lifetime to hold.

you turned your head slightly in his arms, looking up at his face in the shadowy light. james was already watching you, his dark eyes brimming with a soft, unspoken intensity that made your breath catch in your throat.

“what are you thinking about?” you whispered.

he smiled—a slow tender curve of his lips that was meant only for you, and sometimes for the boys. he raised one hand from your waist, his long fingers gently cupping the side of your face, his thumb lightly stroking your cheekbone.

“i’m thinking about how lucky i am,” he murmured, his voice dropping into a register that felt like an angel’s secret. “out of all the people in the world... i got to stand next to you.”

he leaned down, his forehead pressing gently against yours. the warmth of his body, the steady, rhythmic thud of his heart against your back, and the soft, lingering scent of him wrapped around you like a blanket.

“happy anniversary, my girl,” he whispered softly against your lips, right before closing the tiny distance between you to kiss you once more—sweet, unhurried, and full of endless promise for every tomorrow yet to come.

© hyuneskkami ❦