( hiatus ) 一问三不知

↳ @goldencored​

"Did you think I'd forget?" There's a smile in his words— hidden by the golden gauzy curtains pulled 'round their bed and the low light of the oil lamp. He is not quite in shadow, those curtains sheer enough to reveal how pretty he sits, looking very much the part of an imperial concubine— Huaisang's for the taking. "Come here, A-Sang, and accept your present."

         he had been a bit concerned when xuanyu excused himself early from the feast ( which he didn’t even know was happening, for one, he’d been too busy mediating a conflict between two smaller sects in qinghe to realize what day it was)  even though the other had assured it’s nothing serious, and that huaisang needn’t worry nor should he leave his own birthday celebration early.

         well he still did—worry, that is—and so he retreated to his room after the dinner portion of the celebration was done, even declining a second round of drinks, a rarity for him. but xuanyu had been truthful when he told huaisang it’s nothing to worry about, and now he’s faced with his lover sitting on their bed beckoning huaisang to unwrap him like a present.

         slowly, he parted the curtains. with that out of the way, he could finally see that xuanyu was dressed in an extravagant robes and his face covered in powder and rouge, a visual not unlike that of an imperial concubine. huaisang’s reminded daily of how lucky he is, to have such beauty by his side, but never has he been reminded this strongly, as said beauty was offering himself up wholly to huaisang and huaisang only.

         he exhaled a breath, and it’s shaky; he extended a hand, and it’s shaky, too. his whole body was thrumming with anticipation.

         “ i simply didn’t think it was anything noteworthy. even i didn’t remember until dinnertime.”

Huaisang’s stuttering reaction only makes Ziyu’s smile grow wider. There’s little denying how endearing it is, or how his heart flutters because of it. “A-Sang, I was teasing you. I couldn’t possibly expect or force you have coats made for me. Especially not when you’re already offering so much.”

A home of his own sounds like a dream. All his life he’s lived in spaces that weren’t his own. Even now he lives in a gilded palace and can change so little of it to suit his own tastes. To have something of his own that he can decorate freely— it’s enticing, exciting.

“I know you will. Perhaps it seems a little silly to say, because it seems so far off, but I do look forward to retirement.”

          “ it’s not forcing if i wanted to do it!”  he countered immediately. a coat and a plot of land, that’s what he’s putting on the table, so minuscule compared to the actual amount of things he wanted to offer to xuanyu, the amount of things he’s willing to give to make up for what he did. he promised to make sure xuanyu will want for nothing and has every intention to keep it.

          now there’s a conflict happening inside him; the horrible, selfish part of him couldn’t wait for xuanyu to retire, wanting to keep the man for himself. but the rational part of him knew it would be better if it happens later. even he, who became sect leader at the age of 25 ( relatively older compared to cases like jiang wanyin or lan xichen)  struggled under the weight of the responsibilities. the next generation deserved better.

‘   stay still.   ’   he instructed.   ‘   it won’t sting you, if you don’t SCARE it into doing so.   ’   eyes remained fixated upon the tiny insect, which was resting contently on huaisang’s hand. alot of people had an irrational fear of bees, despite them being so small   &&   generally, not hostile unless disturbed. dainty digits lifted close to the insect, which willingly hopped on wangji’s hand instead.   ‘   it’s probably more scared of you, than you are of it. ’      /      &&.   @hwaniao​

          “ h-how would you know?”  huaisang whimpered. he’s genuinely trying to stay still as lan wangji told him to, but he couldn’t help the way his arm slightly tremble from fear. “ i’m plenty scared right now.”

            what a world you live in that the times had changed so. your eyes narrow as you take in the man before you. one day you know his true nature will be revealed. perhaps it’ll be today perhaps years from now. should you trust him and ask for his help today, would he be willing to be capable for you.

          one look from wei wuxian and huaisang knew the man has figured it out. no matter, this was all within expectations, though he supposed that last impromptu bit with lan xichen sped up the whole process by a lot. now all he could do was hope that wei wuxian doesn’t run his mouth.