i tried explaining to this girl at a party once how i could be gay and asexual at the same time and it basically boils down to never being into anyone but like once a year i’ll find a man attractive. and she was like “so what am i if i only like girls, and i’ve never found any of my boyfriends attractive and and i just wanna do cocaine all the time?” i was like “you’re a lesbian with a coke addiction?” and she was like “woooooah”. she broke up with her boyfriend that night and had a threesome with two girls in the bathtub. rebecca if you’re out there, i hope you’re going places. well, not far, since you’re electronically tagged. but spiritually.

sorry i turned your shy, innocent daughter into a rowdy and unashamedly horny man. yeah he's so much happier now. yeahhh sorry it's permanent too. might do it again tomorrow

cds 💿 are so cool its literally a cirlcle 🔵 that has music 🎶 in its heart......

i am going to suck you off! *puts in plastic vampire teeth and gives you the worst blowjob imaginable*

the most attractive thing a man can do is have autism and be transgender I’m sorry I don’t make the rules

can I lick your collar bone? as friends

Hey can I just sit in your lap for a bit? No, I know you're busy.. I just want to sit here. I won't be a distraction. What? No.. I uhh... I didn't grind on you on purpose..... I was just adjusting. I'm not bouncing slightly.. what are you talking about? Anyways.. completely unrelated note, can you just call me a good boy a few times?

the word on the street is 2026 is the year of the dominant bottom

men should learn more about female desire and eroticism and devotion and passion and less about porn

guys I figured it out I just need to suck dick and I’ll be fixed

amazing porn gif. unfortunately the caption u paired with it has made it entirely unsharable

they made horny potions in real life and they're calling it "20mg edible"