How Many Cigarettes Did He Smoke Today?

After the hiding this weekend, this week has been quieter. He’s been maintaining a pack a day. I’m still not happy that he’s not working on cutting down yet. 

Last night he closed and when he came home from work, he had a brand new pack in his jacket with 2-3 gone.

He had today off and spent it chain smoking (as usual, I guess). When he fell asleep I went and checked the pack - 15 left:

So, he smoked a whole pack plus a few, right? Well, then when I was looking for the empty old pack, I found 4 cigarettes in his fucking water bottle. I threw one away and broke another one. I want him to know I saw this bullshit. He (A-FUCKING-GAIN) is trying to pass off a pack as the same one from the previous day. I know it’s not because the empty pack was unmarked and all other packs he’s had have been marked. So this is all about convincing me that he’s smoking a few cigarettes, not full fucking packs. 

He’s been maintaining the pack a day speed, but after the blowout a few weeks ago, things got much calmer. He had stopped hiding his cigarettes, which was a huge first step. As I've said in most of my posts, my main issue is the lying.

This weekend, all of a sudden, he’s started being sneaky again. I am pretty sure he’s punishing me (even if he’s not consciously doing so) for what he perceives as an issue on my end. I am not getting into that here, but it’s unfair and I don’t believe myself to be in the wrong.

Thursday morning he had 11 left. This pack had been replaced by Thursday night, I believe, but I don’t remember 100%

So Friday after I got home from work he had several left in what was a new pack. I think around 15, but I didn't get a picture and I don’t remember for sure. Saturday morning then the aforementioned disagreement took place that I am (probably) being punished for. After he had been out running errands for a couple hours, he came home and took a nap. I could not find his smokes anywhere, but he did have 3 empty packs strewn around the room (one on desk, one in garbage, one in his bag) from over the last few days. I looked all around and could not find the pack in any of the normal spots. I knew he’d had enough left that it was VERY unlikely that he smoked them all while he was out. I looked up and noticed that the cat carrier on top of our pet’s cage was open. I got up onto a chair and looked inside. In a piece of pipe inside the carrier, just out of view if you looked straight in, were the cigarettes. My heart broke a bit. I think he only had 1 left, but I don’t remember for sure. 

I had plans Saturday night. When I got home there was a new pack in his jeans pocket with maybe 15-16 left. It was mostly full, but I didn't get a picture.

Sunday morning he got up and got coffee and then I met a friend for lunch. When I got home, I again couldn't see his pack anywhere. While he napped I checked the pet carrier. The previous day’s empty pack PLUS the new pack from the night before were up there. He had 1 left in the new pack.

Sunday night I took a nap. When I woke up, it was late and he was heading to bed. I went back and checked and here’s what I found:

2 Empty packs in the pipe in the carrier.

Pack #1:

Pack #2:

Empty pack #3 (in his bag, photo for documentation only.

And the new pack on the desk:

This new pack has 18 in it, but he also took 2 out and put them in a cup thing on his desk, so basically he finished off that other pack in the time he was out this morning, I was out at lunch and while I was napping. Then tried to cover for that fact with this new pack. I thought we had moved past this behavior. I was wrong. :(

I haven’t updated in a while because things have been better. This blog exists mostly so I have tracking on his lies. I still haven’t told him that I discovered the hiding spot in the light. That’s sort of my ace if he starts lying again. After I found the smokes hidden out of the pack in the thermos, I confronted him the next day. He tried to tell me he was “metering out a pack” and that I had just “chosen a narrative.” It was such total BS. We had a big fight, but I think I finally got it through to him that as much as I hate the smoking, it’s the lying/sneaking around coupled with the smoking that I WILL NOT stand for. I hadn't been so mad at him or felt so much like breaking up with him in YEARS before this all came to light. Things have been calmer since that night and he’s been a lot more loving.

So he’s stopped hiding packs (mostly, this one today was sort of tucked out of sight, but I am not considering that to be a violation). We haven’t discussed openly the fact that I know he’s smoking a pack a day. That’s next, I guess.

He had 13 left this morning and smoked 3 out of this new pack, for a total of 16 today, April 30. 

Ughhhhh. We had a huge fight today after the hidden smokes yesterday. In spite of all of that, he bought a new pack which is hidden in the light. We fought more, but I still haven’t revealed that I know the hiding spot.

New pack from the light with 5 left:

Old pack with 14 left: 

Now 9 is half his normal pace, but I ASKED him if he bought a new pack. He told me no and left 4 in the pack, emptied the rest out into this thermos bottle thing he has. 

I put them back into the pack and wrote "LIAR” on the inside of the lid. I’m furious. I’m shaking. If he had said “yes” and left a new pack with 18 out, I wouldn’t have been mad. Not HAPPY as I don’t want him smoking at all, but not MAD. 

So yesterday he had 2 more when he went to the store, for a total of 9. Which is half (or less) from his usual pace. 

There were 10 left in the pack at the end of the day. He finished that pack and threw it up into the light. I verified it was the pack dated 4/18. The 4/17 pack is still there too.

The 4/19 pack (which is now being passed off as the 4/17 pack) has 7 left. This brings his total for today to nineteen.

The pack from yesterday has 3 more gone currently (though he’s about to run to the store). So as of now, that’s 7 today.

I woke up and surprised him. He's got a new pack up in the light. I think the one in the box on the desk is gone. He's got to have it somewhere as I know even he didn't smoke 15 cigarettes in 2-3 hours this morning. He MIGHT have left it at work. I'll look later. The new pack has 16 and that means he smoked at least 4 before I got up.

He took a nap so I was able to check the pack. I wrote the date in it too, Behind the paper. He won’t see it.

There’s 15 in this pack. So 21+5 = 26 new updated total since yesterday morning.