Birthday Bitch
It was turning out to be a fairly nice day even though the weather that week had been somewhat unpredictable. The house was uncharacteristically quiet. Days like this weren’t uncommon now that Boogie was often out on the road, leaving the chaos in the house at a minimum.
Ju walked into the kitchen with half-closed eyes, making a beeline for the coffee pot as Deenie sipped from her cup, working on the crossword in the newspaper.
“Good morning to you too, sunshine!” she spoke, without looking up from her task.
“It’s too bright in here.” Ju croaked in her, I-just- woke-up-and-can-barely-find-the-strength-to- speak voice.
“That’s because you’re hungover, sweetie. Again.” Deenie rolled her eyes.
Ju simply didn’t have the energy to go off. She was tired and the days of their heated, short-tempered youth were mellowing out as they all became more civil in adulthood.
“Good.” Deenie smirked, looking up for once from the paper. “Keep that same energy when Boogie gets back.”
Ju scoffed with a chuckle.
“You tell her that too!” “Mornin’ ya’ll” Dejah bounded in, sing-song, all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.
“The energy needs to come down about 12 million notches, babe” Ju held her head.
Dejah laughed as she opened the fridge looking for the orange juice.
“So Boogie is coming back today, I heard.” Dejah said, sounding skeptical, “It’s been months since she’s even slept here. Last time she came home, she didn’t even realize her Jean Paul Gaultier perfume was missing, since she was only here for a day.”
“You better stop takin’ that girl’s stuff, Dejah!” Deenie warned.
“Boogie don’t miss little shit like that. I only took it because I know she’d say yes if I asked her for it!” Dejah shrugged, before popping some bread into the toaster. “Besides, she’s changed. She seems like, nicer now in a way? I dunno.”
“Fuck outta here, she’s the same Bougie Bitch she always was,” Ju interjected, waving her hand dismissively, “She knows it too. Just because she wrote that weak ass self-help book, she thinks she’s an expert now in, whatever hoodoo, booboo garbage juice meta trend is sweeping the masses. Witchcraft is not a fucking trend, bro. She shouldn’t be playing with that shit.”
“True, Remember that fucking demon situation we had on Halloween, years ago?” Deenie reminisced, “All the windows busted out, it was like a movie!”
“Exactly!” Ju sipped her coffee, slowly finding her energy, “There have been many incidents in this house of paranormal activity, and I swear they all was surrounding her.” “Come on ya’ll know that’s not fair.” Dejah chimed in, turning to face them with her arms folded. “If you had some freaky secret power that could communicate with ghosts or whatever, what the hell would you do with it?”
“I dunno. Help somebody I guess.” Deenie replied. “Who says I don’t?”
“Nobody, but I’m just saying if it’s a part of you, you probably can’t just turn it off.” Dejah shrugged, pointing a finger at her head and making a mocking “Duh” face at the girls, who scoffed in response.
“Whatever, she’s so full of shit. Even if that bullshit she wrote in that book is real, her personality is still the same, I don’t care what you say, Dejah, people don’t change.”
“Have you read the book, Ju?”
“I started it, but it was trash, so now it’s a coaster on my nightstand.”
Deenie laughed.
“Ya’ll bein’ real shady right now.” “Hold on now, we’re not haters- I’m just saying she comes off high and mighty. That’s all.” “Power will do that to you, maybe.” Dejah said, catching her toast on her plate the moment it popped out, before walking back up to her room while sipping her OJ.
“Or an inflated ego,” Ju sucked her teeth, irritated as her eyes followed Dejah leaving the kitchen,“She gets that shit from Boogie.”
_____________________________________________________________
By the time she’d arrived, it was nearly 4PM. Boogie came nearly crashing through the door, balancing worn Louis Vuitton luggage on her arms, as her little white bichon came running up barking and jumping all over her.
“Down Momo! Ahh! Mama missed you too!” she cooed at the small dog, before announcing, “I’M HOOOOOMMEEE!”
With closed eyes Boogie threw her arms open wide, waiting for a rush of hugs that did not come.
“Hey Booger,” Rai smiled down from the upstairs banister. “What are you doing?”
“Rai! I was...nothing.” Boogie put her arms down looking somewhat embarrassed. “Where is everyone?”
Rai shrugged.
“Around, I guess.”
Boogie pouted. It wasn’t a big deal for her to come home from a long book tour, but it wasn’t unlike them to miss her birthday.
“It’s my birthday today,” she announced dejectedly.
“Happy birthday!” Rai said smiling, and making her way down the steps, when Dejah suddenly burst out of her room, running down the stairs and hugged Boogie.
“Awh!” Boogie laughed, hugging her back. “Thank you both!”
“I have an announcement to make and I wanted to treat everyone to a girl’s day. I have big news!”
“Ooh! OK! I’ll go tell everyone!” Dejah jumped up and down excitedly before running back up the stairs.
“How are things, Rai?” Boogie asked, just as her phone chimed urgently, demanding her attention.
“Quiet, you know. It’s not boring, but since you’re not around as much, Ju goes through these combative moods all by herself and she doesn’t know what to do with that frustration.”
“Psychology suits you, miss.” Boogie smiled, with a fist bump to her little sister.
“Thank you! I’m almost a doctor- when this semester is over, I’m gonna be legit.” Rai beamed, then, slowly, her smile faded, “She misses you. You know that, right?”
“I don’t know anything she doesn’t tell me,” Boogie shrugged.
“Hello, hello!” Desty and Jayti, followed Dejah, Deenie and Xai down the stairs as welcome home hugs made their rounds and they all caught up for a moment before beginning to wonder what the hold-up was with Ju.
Finally Ju emerged from her room, leather-clad black jacket and shoes, dressed to kill.
“You’re finally back.” she chuckled, as she took her time walking down the stairs. “Next time you go, take that little annoying yappy mutt with you.”
Boogie rolled her eyes before hugging her best frienemy with cheek to cheek kisses.
“I missed you too, Miss Salty- Ooh!” Boogie pulled back suddenly, her eyes watering a bit. “You smell like a distillery, Ju, damn! It’s not even after 5!”
“Mind your business.” Ju flicked her wrist dismissively before tossing two pieces of chewing gum in her mouth. “So what are we doing?” “Right! Sooooo! I rented a party buusss!!!” Boogie exclaimed, leading them all outside with open arms. “Tadaaa!” “Wow, just like the old days.” Deenie scoffed, remembering nights past that got so wild, they all wished they could forget.
“No! Not like that, we’re responsible adults now!!” Boogie said as she led them to the vehicle.
The bus driver opened the door to them, and they all entered to see an interior of woodgrain and leather seats. A small mini fridge with wine and champagne and a small assortment of snacks, cheeses, and chocolate.
“Heeyyy! We fancy now!” Rai voiced her approval, before taking a seat next to the snack bar.
“Eee! I’m glad you approve!” Boogie clapped her hands with glee before telling the driver to proceed to the first stop for luxury mani-pedis and massages at the day spa.
As they all settled into the back seats to get comfortable, Rai filled and passed out champagne glasses, proposing a toast.
“To the Buttacreme sisterhood! May we always have each others’ backs!”
“Cheers!” ____________________________________________________________
“This place is legit!” Boogie called back to the girls as they waited at the crosswalk, to cross the street. “Wow, you ladies sure look nice, today.” and older white, gray-haired gentleman commented, looking over their collective outfits.
“Thank you, Mister!” Jayti bubbled, particularly happy with her colorful spring dress of choice.
“Do you mind taking our picture?” Boogie asked, handing the man her phone, as the light changed. “Sure! Ooh! You all should line up over the lines of the crosswalk, like the Beatles!” he said excitedly, walking backwards to line up the perfect shot as they crossed the street. “Who are the Beatles?” Dejah whispered, to Jayti, who shrugged, before serving face to the camera.
As they all entered The Pampered Palm: Nail Bar, they were met with the acrid scent of Acetone and Enamel- the combination of a sweet chemical smell that excites the high maintenance part of the human female brain; and there were exclaims of “Yaasss!” and “Okurrr!” that rose from the 8-woman group as the cushy pink upholstery and silver damask wallpaper welcomed them into the lap of luxury.
As half the crew sat to get manis, the others got pedis, and a kind uniformed woman served champagne and mimosas which Ju knocked back in a matter of seconds.
Boogie looked worried. “I’m concerned.” she whispered suddenly to Rai, sitting next to her, sipping slowly from her champagne flute. “She’s fine.” Rai said, before shooting Boogie a sympathetic look, “You know how she is… she’s coping.” Boogie, stole a peek at her friend once again, now on the phone, withdrawn from the present moment and enthralled with pondering what color to paint her fingernails next.
“Have a happy birthday!” Rai insisted, raising her glass,
Boogie sighed, shaking off her dark feelings, before smiling and clinking glasses with Rai.
_______________________________________________________
After a couple of hours of pampering, they all made their way to the new Pomerado Luxe Beauty store. As per usual, Boogie went overboard, buying the latest this and that from the Gisza collection.
“Ladies, get whatever you want!” Boogie laughed, placing her hands on her hips as they all winced, when her store receipt printing from the cash register began to resemble a trail of toilet paper.
They were all much more economical in their choices, even though she was paying.
Xai landed on a metallic pink lipstick, Ju found a red to add to her collection, Desty landed on a spring eyeshadow palette, and everyone only chose one thing, except the baby of the Buttacreme bunch who wanted six. “Dejah!” Deenie picked the excess glosses and highlighter from her basket. “NO!”
“Boogie said we could have whatever we want!” She frowned.
“Yeah! But out of courtesy, you shouldn’t be greedy!” Deenie reprimanded with a wag of her finger.
“But-” “No buts, put it back and pick ONE!” Dejah began to protest when Jayti gently squeezed her arm and shook her head.
Leaving the store, everyone was smiling and happy with their purchases, except Dejah who fell behind, pouting a bit and feeling irritated by Deenie.
“She gets on my nerves sometimes, Jay,” she confided in Jayti, “Like, you’re not my mom!”
Jayti pulled Dejah aside a moment, holding her shoulders.
“You’re right. She’s not, and she does have that way about her. But D, she has been there for you- for all of us. It’s just makeup. Don’t let it make you too mad, k?” Jayti comforted her.
Dejah rolled her eyes with folded arms, before drawing a deep breath and nodding, agreeing to let go of her animosity toward the woman.
“Good,” Jayti smiled mischievously, “becaaaaaauuuse-”
Jayti suddenly opened her bag to reveal it full of stolen shit.
“Byyytch!!!!” Dejah burst out laughing so loud, the others turned around, wondering what was so funny.
Jayti hastily zipped up her purse while Dejah made some weird ass excuse about a meme she saw on the internet before rushing the procession onward to their next destination.
________________________________________________________
La Luz Hotel was situated in the middle of downtown. It was rumored that famous people stayed there all the time, and as they walked into the lobby, they were promptly greeted by the staff.
“Miss Patel! You’re just in time for your surprise party!” The girls snickered and Ju scoffed at the woman looking annoyed.
“Well you just ruined the surprise part!” she hissed.
“I apologize,” the woman looked sincerely confused, “Since she planned it for herself, nearly 6 months in advance, I assumed she already knew about it.”
Her words seemed sarcastic, which further irritated Ju, but the look on the woman’s face was choked up as if she were about to cry. So Ju, backed off, uncomfortably.
“Sorry-Lead the way,” she said, exchanging a nervous glance with Desty and Xai.
The Suite was on the 34th floor, with high ceilings and party snacks and favors that meticulously decorated the luxury suite.
“Ahh! This is so cool!” Desty giggled, barely able to contain her excitement.
“So glad you like it!” Boogie laughed, passing out whistles and party poppers to the girls as Xai pulled out her phone to take a pic, “Now Everybody say ‘SURPRISE!’” They played trivia games, danced and talked about the past 10 years of ups and downs they’d all shared- from the happiest moments, to the saddest breakups. They all laughed and cried and caught up from the beginning to the present, resolving past fights and issues that were buried among them all. At that moment, Boogie, busted out the champagne and began pouring glasses for everyone before stating,
“I have an announcement to make,” she said, clearing her voice. “These past 10 years have been such an experience! I’m grateful to each and every one of you for helping me grow into the person I am today! I used to be selfish, spoiled and heartless, but living with you guys helped me evolve into a better person,”
Her voice cracked with emotion and her eyes got hot with tears.
“Thank you so much for being my friends! I’ll always love all of you, so with that, I’d like to announce that I’m going to be-”
“Married!” Ju shouted, slurring her words, “I fucking knew it!”
“No- I’m actually going to be-” “A lesbian!” She cut her off again.
“Ju, relax,” Deenie, squeezed her arm, prompting Ju to snatch away, stumbling toward Boogie. “Sorry, I’m trying to pretend to be psychic like you do.”
The girls winced at the dig, suddenly backing away, giving the two space, as had happened so many times in the past when a fight was about to break out.
“Ju, what is your problem? You’ve been acting like this all day.”
“You always thought you were better than me- NO! ALL OF US! Just because you had money, and you would flaunt it in our face and pit us against each other and you’re JUST WICKED! Forgive me if I’m not buying the ACT, Boogie! You are the same selfish bitch you always were, with a shiny new coat of paint and a nose job!” “Ooh! Somebody stop her!” Rai interjected as Jayti’s arm shot out to stop her from jumping in. “I didn’t get a nose job!” Boogie lied as her finger self-consciously touched the tip of her nose.
“See? So self-absorbed. That’s the only thing you took from EVERYTHING I just said!? Fuck you, Boogie!”
It was as if in slow motion. The raspberries floating in the bubbly champagne flute hit her in the face first then the drink splashed over her immaculate beat, melting her mascara and eyeliner instantly.
“No. The. FUCK. YOU DID NOT!” Boogie shrieked.
“I think I just did.” Ju said flinging the last remaining drops that were in the glass, at her, to make sure she made her point.
A Table skid across the floor, flipping over. Purple and blonde weave was flying, the thud of them collapsing to the floor sent all the girls into a frenzy trying to break up the fight before the cops were called. The freshly manicured raptor claws were out, and even though there were 5 of them, trying to pull the two apart, they were so heatedly engaged, it was nearly impossible. Finally Boogie pinned Ju flat on her back, holding down her wrists, which was pure luck combined with the fact that Ju’s drunkenness had made her lose her balance.
“You ARE A FUCKING LIAR!” Ju shrieked, bucking and thrashing under Boogie’s modest weight, when suddenly, Boogie kissed her.
The gang gasped, Rai’s hands flew to the sides of her eyes, shielding her peripherals as her jaw dropped, Jayti looked like she might faint, Dejah’s face contorted with shock and disgust, while Deenie’s hands flew to cover her young eyes instinctively trying to protect her. Desty and Xai however, exchanged a wide-eyed look that simply prompted them to take another sip of their drinks.
After about 30 seconds of them full on making out on the floor, they finally stopped and looked up at the collectively confused faces of their housemates.
Boogie slowly stood up, lending a hand to Ju, who wobbled to a stand as well…
“So… I guess you’re all wondering, what that was about.” Boogie started.
The awkward, tense silence hung thick in the air, as they were all rendered completely speechless.
“We maybe...hooked up...a few times…” she trailed off.
“WHAT?!?!?” Dejah shouted from behind Deenie’s knitted hands over her face.
“There was this time… with that Australian guy...Tristen… we might have had a threesome.” Ju added in, guiltily.
“WHAT?!?” Dejah exclaimed once again.
“Anyway… after that, things changed a bit between us… We just hooked up, but it didn’t mean anything!” Boogie dismissed.
“Clearly it meant something to ME!!” Ju glared at her, shaking, with tears watering her eyes, when she finally threw her hands up and stormed out of the hotel room, slamming the door behind her.
Boogie reluctantly went after her, and found her standing outside on the hallway balcony of the hotel, smoking a cigarette.
“You smoke now, too?” Boogie jested.
“What do you care?” Ju dismissed her, flicking ashes to the ground.
“Ju, I’m sorry, if what we did, confused you. I’m not a lesbian. Sure, we tried some shit, but it wasn’t like I made a full commitment to gayness! It wasn’t THAT GAY.”
“I don’t even know what that means!” Ju sneered. “It wasn’t just a ‘few times’ like you’re convincing yourself. I mean, I wasn’t counting, but the fact that I LOST count, means that you’re trying to minimize it to something meaningless.”
“But, you’re not a lesbian either!” “That’s not the fucking point!” Ju rebutted, “You can’t just treat me like one of your little fucktoy boyfriends; use me and leave.”
“Wow, okay, I didn’t use you anymore than you used me!”
“REaALLy?!” Ju snapped, “ because as I recall, I never, not once, came to your room in the dead of night like a stray cat scratching at YOUR door.”
Boogie groaned with exasperation.
“Ju! I wasn’t trying to use you! I just thought we were having fun!”
“It was. Until you broke my heart.”
“I didn’t know!”
“Correction: You didn’t care.” Ju said, grinding the cigarette butt into ash and flicking it over the balcony. “As soon as you started traveling all the time, it was like you couldn’t WAIT to leave and have an excuse not to talk to me. You wouldn’t even answer my calls or texts, and most of the time it only about regular shit, like ‘Bring home some toilet paper.’”
“Ju, I’m sorry!”
“You ghosted me like some fuckboy. You KNOW how my relationships with men have gone… and now you’ve ruined women for me too...”
“Ju, I swear to God, if I had known how you felt-”
“Stop playing coy. You knew how I felt when I left you those dusty, sappy ass voicemails when you were gone. You knew how I felt when I made you come 4 times in one night.You just didn’t want to commit, and I get it. But you can’t just buy back my fucking friendship and, for once, throwing money at the problem ain’t gonna make it disappear, Boogie.”
“Ju…” Boogie reached out touching her shoulder, teary-eyed, when Ju shrugged her off “ I really am sorry…”
“You’re right about one thing: I’m not a lesbian- hell I never even considered myself bi, but what I am willing to admit, is I am damaged. In spite of that, I trusted you, because we were friends, and you made me feel accepted, only to turn around an reject me on the basis that you’re ‘not a lesbian’. I’d never been with a woman before you; how about you, Boogie?
Boogie’s eyes were glued to her champagne stained shoes with guilt.
“Fuck you.” Ju said, with her back facing Boogie as she pulled out another cigarette. “I never want to see you again.”
Boogie, slowly nodded before hesitantly turning around to pull the door open to see cast shadows on the floor scrambling from around the hallway corner, that let her know everyone heard everything.
As she walked back into the suite, everyone was behaving so over the top in trying to act normal, Boogie couldn’t help but call it out.
“I feel so dirty.” she admitted. “Look, guys, I’m leaving… for good. I didn’t want things to end like this,”
“Aww! Boogie” They exclaimed and began coming in to hug her goodbye when she held up a hand, stopping them and backing away toward the door.
“I really don’t deserve it,” she said, teary eyed, “I just wanted one last good memory, for old-time’s-sake, but I’m sorry, ya’ll; I can’t do this… “
“Boogie, wait!” Dejah called out as Boogie opened the door to leave.
“I’ll send for my things. Goodbye.”
As the door shut behind her, the room fell silent with a heaviness that left them all feeling disconnected and hollow. The candy nipples and crumbled BDSM gingerbread men littering the floor along with smashed cupcakes and spilled champagne, prompted them all to begin cleaning up the mess, while humming “happy birthday” in such a somber tone it sounded like a negro spiritual.
___________________________________________________________________
The weeks that followed stretched into a month, and as the weather started to become warmer, the Buttacreme house welcomed a new college sophomore who moved into Boogie’s old room and mostly kept to herself.
The awkwardness surrounding the birthday party, had created a moody tension around Ju, that, at the slightest mention or reference to Boogie seemed to set her off into a funk that would last for days.
Other than that, some normalcy was returning with the intro of the new girl, Kayla, since she was unaware of the drama and simply offered up baked goods to anyone and everyone who was interested.
“She’s cool.” Rai said to Jayti, taking a sip of lemonade as they sat out on lawn chairs in the backyard, soaking up the springtime sun.
“Yeah, she’s so innocent though.” Jayti laughed, “Remember when we were that age?”
“God, I don’t think I was ever so baby-faced in my youth.”
Jayti sighed and opened up her magazine to read up on the latest gossip.
“Oh my god!” Jayti’s jaw dropped.
“What?” Rai looked up suddenly, from her phone.
“House meeting…” Jayti said, flipping the magazine and showing Rai the article.
__________________________________________________________________
It was dark by the time Ju came out of her room. As she bound down the stairs, headed to the kitchen, she saw the entire house, save for Kayla, seated in the living room, surrounding the coffee table, whispering quietly amongst themselves. It looked suspicious to say the least.
“What’s up?” She asked, taking a detour into the living room to see a single magazine in the center of the coffee table.
They all remained silent, not certain how to break the news.
Dejah grabbed the magazine, and flipped to the page, handing it to Ju.
Upon seeing Boogie’s photo, Ju scoffed, pushing the quarterly, back at Dejah, with rejection, when Dejah, pushed it again, for Ju to take a closer look.
“...The 34 year old best-selling author was reported missing on April 6th 2020 soon after she arrived in Japan, when she unexpectedly didn’t show up for a book signing, and subsequent attempts to contact or locate her yielded no results. The police began an ongoing investigation that led them to the local den of Yakuza who are known to use spiritual mediums situationally.
Ichigo Soichirou, the lead detective on Blaire Patel’s case, reported that it “isn’t uncommon for the Yakuza to outsource to a foreigner as they are harder to track.”
April 12th, only 6 days after the initial report, Miss Patel’s body was found in a Freight container at a commercial loading site in Tokyo Harbor. The case is ongoing, suspects are being interrogated and arrests have been made, but the tragedy of Patel’s sudden and violent end has undoubtedly shaken her family and fanbase to the core. Prayers and condolences to the family and close friends of ‘The Ratchet Medium’ author. She will be missed.”
Ju’s breath shuddered, prompting Deenie to stand up and hug her, when she pulled away, hyperventilating for breath.
“She’s….gone.” Ju sobbed.
Desty ran to hug her oldest friend, stroking her hair and whispering comforting words to her, when Ju pulled away, turning her back to them and slowly, ascending the stairs as they called after her, worried.
Once she got to the landing at the top, Desty’s voice called out emotionally.
“JU! We all loved her! Stop pushing us away! We need to heal together!”
Ju’s hand gripped the wooden stair banister, digging her nails into the varnished finish, when she slowly turned her head looking down at the lot of them, standing and looking up at her, with deep concern ingrained into their facial expressions.
“These are the last tears I cry for Boogie.” Ju announced. “Good Riddance.”
With a final wipe of her tears, her footsteps receded and her bedroom door slammed shut; leaving them all frozen in a moment of time wondering what would happen now?
