gahh

i love misha and i understand where he’s coming from and respect his opinion but i feel like i just studied for a test and he gave me an F- i feel like i got punched

on twitter he said that he liked the ending of supernatural, and that there was no “bury your gays” trope. he also said there was no greater conspiracy, and that the spanish dub was a “rouge translater”

this genuinely hurts- probably more than it should but whatever. this was that trope because after queerbaiting for (i’ll be nice) 5-7 years and then killing the character off physically is the trope at its finest. yes we know he’s alive. but he was only mentioned offscreen twice- probably totaling 5 seconds of screen time, and not in the show ever again. someone working on the show (writers, execs from cw- someone) decided deliberately to imply that he’d come back just to keep people watching which is queerbaiting at its best.

moreover, we didn’t get closure. like i said it was never mentioned again, which would’ve sucked but we could’ve lived with if we had gotten anything from dean at all. telling sam how he felt about cas, monolouging into a phone, a letter, an empty beer, the sky- fucking anything. we got absolutely nothing- at all. beyond being shitty and kind of homophobic, that’s just plain bad writing for a finale because people are obviously gonna be mad about a loose end that big.

this show, in general, has been so important not because of the representation we (the lgbt+ fans) have gotten, but indisputably in spite of the representation. the cw in general, but especially supernatural had bad representation. in sometimes harmful stereotypes- overly feminine gay men being the main representation- or in the “bury your gays” trope that i mentioned before. you see this everywhere from the only gay hunters being guest stars in one episode and never mentioned again to charlie being killed off unnecessarily and for little/no reason (plot wise)

the reason we latched on anyways was because the personalities spoke to us. dean- who felt he always had to put up an act and felt what he wanted was never as important as what other people wanted- who tried to hide from his emotions constantly and was terrified of being alone. that speaks to us. those of us who stay closeted because what we want isnt as important as keeping the other people in our lives happy. who push down our feelings to avoid the potential of the consequences. and the fear that because we’re in a smaller group with no representation, that we might be alone forver.

and sam, who rebels against his family- who dreams of running away and being different than the rest of his family, who hides sometimes that he wants that even though people know because he doesn’t wasn’t too make them mad (also some similar points i already hit on with dean). we dream of getting away and starting a new life where we can be who we are, and even when we’re out we choose not to mention it because we don’t want to upset people.

and cas, finally. cas is so relatable it hurts sometimes. the way he fears rejection so deeply, how he never feels like he’s quite at home, and how he never fits in. how he’s so different from everyone, but also how he wants to fit it so badly- but he just can’t sometimes. how he doesn’t always understand the way he feels and how he feels guilty for being who he is(ik it’s a moral dilemma for him and not about his identity but it still speaks to us). also because he’s an angel his gender, and therefore his identity can be up to interpretation a little more.