Honey Syrup

i should shut up on main i think

let me rest in peace for fuck’s sake

it is so nice that my friends think i am not a bad person because i treat them kindly and conscientiously but i wonder what they would think if they actually believed the truth that my kindness is the same as a smile that doesn’t reach the eyes… practiced and calculated out of habit and necessity. someone like me must be so rare because everyone i meet refuses to believe me about my inhumanity. what is so hard to believe? they ogle serial killers imprisoned for their crimes like some kind of mentally deficient zoo but find it so hard to believe there are others who do not have the means to reach the end?

crazy how the thing that finally kicked my weight loss desperation was when i was shopping in japan and the clerks would look between me and my sister and immediately kindly remind me that everything is f size (one size fits all- small)