✿Pastel✿

2013-2016 Hyundai Genesis Coupe

and every time we kiss I swear I could fly

people foolishly dismiss desserts and treats as having no nutritional value when they actually are necessary for refilling your sanity stat. to prove my point please observe the emotional stability of the next person you meet who doesnt let themselves ever eat any form of dessert

"all you ever do is complain" that's not true. I also resent.

if you're not 26 years old right now you will be soon

NO MORE SONGS UNDER 3 MINUTES. GO BACK INTO THE STUDIO

what people dont get about divorces is the Whole Thing About Dogs

i have written custody plans for labrador retrievers more complex than i have for children. i went to four years of undergrad, three years of law school, and sat for the bar exam to write up custody exchange provisions for dogs with hyphonated last names

my clients are paying $295 an hour for me to go to court and litigate who makes veterinary decisions for Chuckles the Goldfish and theres literally nothing i can do to stop them

you literally have to unironically listen to some shit like party rock anthem so you don’t kill yourself

*guy looking down at you after beating the shit out of you* hey i really wanna commend you for being the bigger person here and not stooping to my level. You’re such a better person than me