Sentence Stories And Other Crap

I just had a tiny spider crawling on my knee. Instead of the usual thought of “oh no, a spider!” My thought was “I’m too tired to be Spiderman today” and I flicked that bugger as far as he would go.

Maybe if Mother Gothel hadn’t told Rapunzel her real birthday she wouldn’t have worked out the laterns were for her.

Cute guy just got on bus. Me: hmm I like him Cute guy: *bangs head on roof while getting into seat* Me: he's perfect

She knew mother birds taught their young to fly by pushing them out of the nest so it didn’t seem that unnatural when her grandfather pushed her over the edge of the ravine. Though the spikes at the bottom may have been overkill.

He had expensive taste but he mostly wore the clothes his sister made him. It wasn’t that he couldn’t afford them, it was just really hard finding a designer that made pants with a decent tail hole.

She leaned on the porch railing and watched the lake glisten in the early morning sun. It was beautiful and expanded far beyond the horizon. And it hadn't been there yesterday.

He wasn't surprised when he discovered that over the years the aliens had slowly and secretly invaded the planet. He was slightly more surprised when he discovered he was one of them.

The rope around my neck was starting to itch. I had been hanging there for three hours now and while it was funny to see the locals' faces, I knew when they eventually cut me down they would have questions. I was going to have to move again.

For twelve years he sat in front of the panel of lights making sure that none of them flashed red. When they hired him they told him the one rule: red = dead. In hindsight he probably should've told them he was colour blind.

The cement blocks on the dock's pillars were rough and cracked, they looked eerily similar to the ones encasing my feet. Today was not a good day for swimming.

Names are a powerful thing: with them he could see the echoes of a person's memories, creep into their innermost thoughts, even bend them to his will. He wished he could remember his.

She held the fate of the world in her hands. If only the fates knew how clumsy she was.

Her best friend had the confidence of a runway model and all the vocabulary of a cereal box; next to him she could start levitating and no one would notice. Which was good, because sometimes she did.

When he was seventeen he was tasked with saving the world. It's too bad he was a terrible procrastinator.