os/coxae

TW: mild ED content, trauma, abuse, mental health struggles etc.

*MINORS*: I do not want you following me. if you follow me, I will likely block you. HOWEVER!!! if you need help seeking an abortion in the United States, please lmk ASAP - I can HELP YOU. I do this work in real life. Otherwise, DNI! Thank you angels!

you can call me k (she/her). i'm 31. i'm (re)lapsing in my ED (EDNOS/OSFED - purging disorder). i also suffer from CPTSD, GAD, and depression. my DMs are always open for you, especially if you're older (25+) and still struggling with this shit.

i am pro recovery & i actively encourage recovery. this is simply my safe space. i just need a place to vent and be witnessed in this struggle. i try not to post too much explicit ED content on my main, but you will see some in my likes. i post daily ed vent/rant text posts, which ALWAYS appear with a trigger warning and a "keep reading."

stats after the jump.

waddup, i haven't been around all month so i thought i'd update with the highlights of my weird fucking life and also apologize (as if i need to) for being so sporadic.

irl, i'm an attorney, and i work in reproductive justice. i help minors get abortions and work with nonprofits across the US. it's great work, but it's hard work.

in my state i've been working on a bill to secure reproductive rights and abortion rights and it got introduced the day i got surgery 3/3. so that's why the month was a shit show. i had to go to the state capitol and testify, i had to work with state reps on their questions about the bill, a whole bunch of wild stuff.

the good news is that my bill passed through both houses of our general assembly and is at the governor's desk :)

during all this i got a nasty bout of the flu. i know i am actually for real relapsing because i couldn't manage to break my current eating patterns even though i literally felt like i was dying. i still only had one meal a day and because i was so sick, it was like bullshit food. probably didn't help the length of the illness but whatever, i feel better now.

only other related update is that my fucking mom finally came to see me - she didn't know i was sick, because she never calls me. i had told my grandma, because she called me, and then i made the decision that i wasn't going to go out of my fucking way to announce my illness to my own mom. she'd know if she ever fucking checked in on me. even a text. well, she finds out, she comes over to my house to see me and drop off a present from an aunt, and in the 5 fucking minutes she's here she manages to get out "well at least you look like you've lost a few pounds"

no fucking shit sherlock, but also, really? you're going to look your 31 year old daughter - whose eating disorder treatment you paid for - in the eyes and let her know that you still watch her weight, that you still notice when she's lost weight, and that you STILL think it's a good idea to tell her you value the fact that she's smaller now than the last time you saw her? totally cool and healthy adult activities. why can't you just ask me if i need fucking soup or dayquil or a fucking hug like a normal fucking mom?

christ.

so that's it. i can't believe march is almost already over. i have lots of goals for june coming up and i need to buckle down again, my weight loss has slowed way down and i know it's because my body has been through hell this month with the surgery and that flu and the stress of the bill. i'm hoping it evens out in april.