deep in my mind

i'm so hungry for love i am starving

i think about him and him and him

no one to love

i would give him all of me but he's too tired

But what makes me so sad and drained is the fact that I disappoint over and over again.

I am not a loser but have to admit my failure all the time to people I care about. Wish I didn't tell them about it in the first place.

Coming home, being asked how it went, reading it on instagram "how did it go?"

I do not want to answer. Would love to lie but can't.

Sorry for ghosting you, I was too disappointed in myself and didn't want to disappoint you as well.

he grabbed my leg

his hand between my thighs

he pushed his crotch against my knee

his arm around my shoulder, hand laying on my breast

my head on his chest

his fingers stroking my lips, putting them in my mouth