Beware the sarcastic monster that is I.

Michelle Gomez, our very own Missy, joined Twitter last night! Go give her a follow @MichelleGomez! 

If a kid refuses to sleep during a nap, is he resisting a rest?

if you ever think about sending me an ask and decide not to cause “oh she doesn’t care” or “oh I don’t want to bother her” literally I’m the loneliest piece of shit you can find and would still love you if you sent me the word nuzzle over and over again

good.

Atheist say “Oh my God!” because they find the situation unbelievable.

when u catch someone lookin at you for like the 15th time and u just like damn u tryna holla or what

If you rip a hole in a net, there are actually less holes in it than there were before.

it’s very frustrating being a girl and trying to flirt with other girls like. you tell them, ur cute. ‘Aw thank you’ no. no i’m being gay with you. homo intended. damn it

IT WAS A SIMPLE NICE THING, AND A COOL THING, WHAT DO YOU EVEN GET OUT OF BEING A FUCKER AND DESTROYING IT?

i long for the day when harry potter is classic literature, so my ridiculously extensive knowledge can be considered intellectual, like it would be if it were shakespeare or dickens, rather than just a little sad