independent WARDEN COUSLAND of bioware's DRAGON AGE universe; canon divergent & headcanon based. affiliated with highevar. written by MARTY (he/him, 25+).
#HIGHAVER. an independent roleplay blog for WARDEN COUSLAND of bioware’s DRAGON AGE universe but hugely fandom adaptable. canon divergent & based on headcanon. written by MARTY (he/him, 25+). please read my rules before following / interacting. any memes i reblog are always open & accepting! affiliated with @highevar.
rules. about. verses.
current verses of interest: modern, d.octor w.ho, r.ed d.ead.
as a general note: i do have some memory issues & this does impact my ability to run this blog. i may sometimes forget about drafts or plotting/starter calls or anything along those lines, so please feel free to give me a nudge if you think i might have forgotten about something! i won't be irritated by it at all and actually appreciate the reminder if it's been more than a week or so.
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❛⠀⠀of course. they got you to pay attention, didn't they? must be doing something right, after all,⠀ ❜⠀ she says, tittering like an old matron, though with considerable more charm, dimpled smile as good of an answer as he is going to get. of course no one says no to her. no one dares. it doesn't even cross their minds, and when they, for reasons beyond her great understanding, they attempt something like that, well... that dimpled smile has other uses.⠀ ❛⠀⠀so you've heard. good. saves us time. come on, cowboy.⠀ ❜⠀
"Educated guess, actually." There was no way that he wasn't getting dragged into this, however. That was as obvious as Clara's usual ways: she would try and bypass anyone who told her no, and he would inevitably find himself helping her regardless. Pretending that he wouldn't was just wasting time, at the end of the day. So here he was, wrapping up this dullest of work in favour of whatever nonsense Clara was in the middle of. "So - wipe that smile off your face and catch me up, won't you? Be nice to know who you'll be making me piss off this time."
“don’t you dare try your usual tricks on me. i know exactly how you operate.” also clara lmao
❛⠀⠀is that so? ⠀ ❜ ⠀ tongue touches the roof of her mouth as she crosses the small distance between them, dodging curious unit workers and what looks like a weary accountant along the way. perching herself on his desk without a care about the official papers she was creasing, or if a pen cluttered to the ground, she swung her feet back and forth, crowding his vision. balfour sutherland just admitted he was paying attention to her. there was nothing else as important. ⠀ ❛⠀⠀and pray, tell, what are my tricks? ⠀ ❜
"Are you sure you want me to answer that?" Balfour asked as he leaned back in his seat. There were worse intruders than Clara Oswald, though even he had to admit that he was worried by the look on her face. As if he'd just said something that had pleased her very much. The only problem was, he wasn't sure what that was. Perhaps it was something in his face - which was worse. Endlessly worse. He decided not to look at her any more then, instead turning his attention back to the work she was interrupting. As if it were that easy. "Someone's said no to you." Putting his foot in it, here. Even if he didn't recognise it. "So you've come to me to try and get your way. That right?"
remember when i was watching a.ftersun and then they hit me with the main guy saying "love you" as a goodbye to his ex on the phone and then he had this convo w/ his kid and it was all so modern balfour & cate
dialogue starters from DOCTOR WHO SEASON 9.
feel free to edit for context / continues under the cut.
"Why do you always assume I'm lying?"
"An enemy's just a friend you don't really know yet."
"Wherever you go, there are people who care enough to find you."
"Anyone can hide from an enemy. No one from a friend."
"I did something wrong. I let somebody down when I should have been brave enough and strong enough to do better."
"You do realise you're still an idiot."
"Are you any good with a broadsword?"
"It's okay. I'm not going to hurt you. Just don't run."
"He doesn't know we're here, does he?"
"When do I not see you?"
"Nobody dies here. Not one person, not one of my friends, do you understand?"
"You want to know how dangerous I am?"
"Is that supposed to frighten me?"
"If she is really dead, then you'd better be very, very careful how you tell me."
"What am I even looking for?"
"They don't have much respect for you, do they?"
"I'm so glad you didn't have to see that."
"I'm your friend. I'm your friend!"
"You know what? I've just had a very clever idea."
"How long do you think it's been down here?"
"What's wrong? You're not happy. Why aren't you happy? Tell me."
"Wait, wait. I don't think they're going to hurt us."
"Where do you think you're going?"
"Do you know what you need? You need a hobby."
"Where have you been? Everyone's been looking for you."
"We're coming back, aren't we?"
"I'm fine, by the way, in case you were worried."
"We need to get there. It's our only way out."
"You're sure they're not going to hurt us?"
"You seem to know an awful lot about me."
"I'm asking what I should say to you."
"I'm not ready yet. I don't want to think about that. Not yet."
"You didn't try very hard to stop her, though, did you?"
"You can't cheat time."
"No one is coming to save you."
"You're always talking about what you can and can't do but you never tell me the rules."
"We're time travellers. We tread softly. It's okay to make ripples, but not tidal waves."
"I had a dream you'd all died. It was so real, I thought I'd made it happen."
"There's nothing to fear, strange maiden."
"What's the one thing that gods never do? Gods never actually show up!"
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you afraid."
"I have no reason to fear you."
"Not every misfortune that befalls us is down to you."
"We're not cowards. We do not run."
"Stay. You could help us. I know you could."
"A good death? Is that the best we can hope for?"
"I've got a hobby, thanks. It's you, by the way."
"Every time we do something like this, I keep thinking, what if something happens to you?"
"What do you think our chances are tomorrow?"
"I cannot keep you safe. I do not have the strength. But I will try to till the last beat of my heart."
"I'm sick of losing people."
"Look at you, with your eyes, and your never giving up, and your anger, and your kindness."
"One day, the memory of that will hurt so much that I won't be able to breathe."
"I do it for the adventure. Isn't that what life's all about?"
"Now is not the time to be showing off."
"How many people have you lost?"
"Why should I be responsible for you?"
"You're not like this. I know you're not."
"This is what you made of me."
"Did you miss me?"
"What's going on here? Fun and games?"
"I'm a friend. I've come to help."
"Don't do this. You know it's me. Don't let them trick you."
"I love you. I forgive you and I love you."
"You're talking nonsense to distract me from being really scared."
"You see, that's the problem. I am a brilliant liar. How are you ever going to know?"
"So, you must have thought I was dead for a while. How was that?"
"Do I look like I'm kidding? Is this a kidding face?"
"Is that your answer for everything?"
"Oh, admit it. I totally saved your life."
"What were you doing last night?"
"There is no nice way to say you're about to die."
"You enjoyed that way too much."
"You were upset, weren't you?"
"They look at me as if they want to kill me themselves."
"I did this to save you, you silly thing."
"Why do they always run?"
"So this is your life, then? Just bouncing around saving people?"
"Oh, she is the worst. I love her. Take that how you like."
"I swear, I never meant for anyone to get hurt."
"What were you thinking? Sacrificing yourself?"
"I can do whatever the hell I like."
"You've read the stories. You know who I am. In all of that time, did you ever hear anything about anyone who stopped me?"
"I did this, do you hear me? I did this. This is my fault."
"Listen, if this is the last I ever see of you, please, not like this."
"No. This - This isn't happening. This can't be happening."
"Why can't I be like you?"
"You're going to be alone now and you're very bad at that."
"Don't let this change you."
"Don't go. Stay with me."
"This is as brave as I know how to be."
"I know it's going to hurt you but, please, be a little proud of me."
"I can't keep doing this. I can't! I can't always do this! It's not fair!"
"You are not the only person who ever lost someone. It's the story of everybody. Get over it."
"Nothing's sad until it's over. Then everything is."
"Is this a story or did this really happen?"
"Isn't this going a little far?"
"I'll try not to break your jaw."
"Please, I don't want this."
"Look at me again. In the eye. Look at me. Just do it."
"Tell me what they did to you."
"People like me and you, we should say things to one another."
"You really are thick, aren't you?"
"You don't seem surprised to see me."
"I'm trying to keep you safe."
"Nobody's ever safe. I've never asked you for that. Ever."
"These have been the best years of my life and they are mine."
"So what happens now? Hey? Me and you, what do we do now?"
"Why don't we just fly away somewhere?"
"I don't think I could ever forget you."
"No. Stop it. You're saying goodbye. Don't say goodbye!"
"Run like hell, because you always need to. Laugh at everything, because it's always funny. Never be cruel and never be cowardly. And if you ever are, always make amends."
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❛⠀⠀ probably. but who is gonna tell on me? ⠀ ❜ ⠀ bal and what army? oh, she is sure he can create some trouble, and that pike and la'an might look kindly upon his allegations, but she's got m'benga on her side, and there is only so far this ship can go without urgently requiring them.
unless balfour figured out a way to shake off the bad luck star that followed pike and enterprise around, she had this fight in the bag.
❛⠀⠀ oh yeah. i love your moaning and groaning, and the fact i know you came back because you didn't follow my orders. my favorite patient, ⠀ ❜ ⠀ she says, sarcasm barely hiding the fact she means every single word.⠀knee digs into his side as she secures her hold on his shoulder. ⠀ ❛⠀⠀ i should start charging you for all the grief you give me. ⠀ ❜
"I repay you in love and devotion, what are you talking about?" And heartfelt drawings, even if it took him an age to work up the courage to let her see them. Balfour was stupid like that, after all. Always had to work up to those firsts, as if they were the most terrifying things in the world. Which they were. They were getting easier, though, bit by bit, and he did owe it to Christine to at least try. The world wouldn't end - she wouldn't get sick of him or meet some grisly end - just because he finally opened his heart to her.
"Admit it. Your day's way better when you get to see me and my stupid knee." He was a terrible patient, it was true - and yet, getting to see Christine for five minutes was more than worth suffering through the rest of it. "That's why I keep coming back. Gotta keep morale up, y'know?"
❛⠀⠀ what do i strike you as, then? tell me, what’s your take? not unit’s take, i don’t care an iota about their reading. i wanna know what you are thinking.⠀ ⠀ ❜⠀ ⠀ the question encapsulates who she is, in a mannner. bashful and demanding. side-stepping the compliment offered, so she doesn’t have to agree or disagree with his assessment of her good character, but also wanting to hear him shower her with compliments for a little while longer.
add a dash of contempt for institutions, and that's clara oswald for you.⠀
it also offered her something else to think about. something she had no trouble losing herself into. herself. it was an endlessly fascinating subject. she could — and has — spent hours constructing and deconstructing her story, more so in the past months, when her genre shifted gears unexpectedly, story unfolding out of contemporary romance into fantasy.
A hell of a demand to the man whose hand she was currently holding. There was such a thing as too much - for Balfour, at least, who always struggled to find the right words for the right time but twice as badly at a time such as this. It was too... intimate. Especially for the man who still failed to look his own sister - the woman who knew him better than anyone else - in the eye when he was discussing his feelings.
Balfour would give Clara what she wanted. But he would take his hand back, first.
"I think you're very kind. And clever." The words came slowly, as they often did with him. He had to make sure that he was saying the right ones, in the right way. As he spoke, Balfour wrung his hands. "Brave, too, to the point where it probably overrides your cleverness just a little bit." He smiled. "And you're very, uh - what are you, Yorkshire?" English accents weren't his forte. Evidently. "Northern. In a good way - not a Londoner way."
❛⠀⠀ i could do that. ⠀ ❜ ⠀ land her tardis in the backroom, spend hours doing nothing with balfour, forget, for just a second, that things had changed and pretend she still belonged here.
maybe even do something painfully domestic like cook a meal with him. a home-cooked meal, none of that junk she got travelling. potatoes, gravy, maybe even get him to crack some old recipes just for her as she ran to the market to get themselves a nice cake for tea.
she could do that...
❛⠀⠀ or you could come with me, ⠀ ❜ ⠀ she says, dropping her gaze to her hands, smirk painted on her lips. ⠀ ❛⠀⠀we could see the moon landing and be back for tea.⠀ ❜
Balfour laughed. He didn't mean to. It was just one of those things. Like that bright red blush that spread across his cheeks - like right now - whenever he went and felt too much. Quite the change of pace, this, so she'd have to forgive him for it. Only, what else was he meant to do? When he'd gotten so used to being the one who got left behind? This felt like a dream. He was wringing his hands even as that big, gorgeous smile of his spread across his face, full of too much.
"Are you fucking serious?" There was no saying no to Clara. Yes, Balfour had his life and his responsibilities, but Calum was with Cate this week - and Clara was in possession of a time machine. Back in time for tea. She'd said it herself. There was only ever going to be one answer, wasn't there? "Yes. Absolutely. Anywhere."
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“Little bit of column A, little bit of column B.” Julia smiled slightly, drawing on her cigarette and letting the smoke stream out through her nose. Then she sighed. “I had a hunch you'd come back, but I wasn't sure how accurate it'd be.” Along with the spark of magic growing within her, a certain sixth sense had also taken root. Somehow, she'd known to expect him back today. Perhaps that was even why she'd been sitting out there for an hour, just waiting. “You feeling like a smaller dickhead is just a perk.”
Balfour wasn't sure what to do with this. Someone having even the smallest little bit of faith in him - instead of expecting to just be a fuck up. He didn't know how to accept it. There was a blush creeping steadily up his neck, and he had to avert his eyes, a firm frown upon his brow. Finally, he fished his lighter out of his pocket and lit his cigarette, grateful for the distraction.
"Are you guys any further along or...? I'm not sure I make your odds any better, but - you know." He would do what he could.
@stormlit asked: "You seem to know an awful lot about me."
Balfour shrugged, non-committal, and offered Mrs Adler the briefest of glances to see if she was still looking at him. Her gaze was firm and steady. There was something quite distrusting in it, he thought, and he wondered, perhaps, if he had not crossed some unspoken line in his attempts to be kind. Still sat upon the log he had dragged down here some time ago for a place to sit, Balfour looked back to the Flat Iron. His face was red.
"I just listen, is all." A true enough fact, though he realised slightly too late that he was implicating the others in having talked of her. But how could they not? There were good hearts in this gang, even if they were rotten criminals all. Some of them, they could not help but be concerned about the woman that Dutch had... saved. In that way of his. The girls seemed to care for her for the most part, anyway, and Balfour always had an easier time talking to them than the boys.
"I'm sorry, Mrs Adler - I wasn't trying to make you uncomfortable," he said after a moment. He looked at her again now, drawing his heel through the sand, shoulders tense. "Only, I heard you'd been harmonica and, well, I thought - since it is we both like music, then, I thought you might like to talk about your favourite songs or something. It's a small camp, you know?"
@miss-polly asked: "This is as brave as I know how to be."
"Okay. That's fine with me." Balfour's smile was warm and understanding. Frankly, he was just glad to be able to see her outside of the café - and it was fun, having a bit of a kick about. (Turned out, actually, he quite liked football when he was playing for fun.) Maybe the offer of dragging her along to some stuff with some of the club - men's and women's - was a bit much right now. He gave the ball a boot back her way. "Let me know if you change your mind, though, eh? They're alright, that lot. As far as footballers go."
dialogue starters from DOCTOR WHO SEASON 9.
feel free to edit for context / continues under the cut.
"Why do you always assume I'm lying?"
"An enemy's just a friend you don't really know yet."
"Wherever you go, there are people who care enough to find you."
"Anyone can hide from an enemy. No one from a friend."
"I did something wrong. I let somebody down when I should have been brave enough and strong enough to do better."
"You do realise you're still an idiot."
"Are you any good with a broadsword?"
"It's okay. I'm not going to hurt you. Just don't run."
"He doesn't know we're here, does he?"
"When do I not see you?"
"Nobody dies here. Not one person, not one of my friends, do you understand?"
"You want to know how dangerous I am?"
"Is that supposed to frighten me?"
"If she is really dead, then you'd better be very, very careful how you tell me."
"What am I even looking for?"
"They don't have much respect for you, do they?"
"I'm so glad you didn't have to see that."
"I'm your friend. I'm your friend!"
"You know what? I've just had a very clever idea."
"How long do you think it's been down here?"
"What's wrong? You're not happy. Why aren't you happy? Tell me."
"Wait, wait. I don't think they're going to hurt us."
"Where do you think you're going?"
"Do you know what you need? You need a hobby."
"Where have you been? Everyone's been looking for you."
"We're coming back, aren't we?"
"I'm fine, by the way, in case you were worried."
"We need to get there. It's our only way out."
"You're sure they're not going to hurt us?"
"You seem to know an awful lot about me."
"I'm asking what I should say to you."
"I'm not ready yet. I don't want to think about that. Not yet."
"You didn't try very hard to stop her, though, did you?"
"You can't cheat time."
"No one is coming to save you."
"You're always talking about what you can and can't do but you never tell me the rules."
"We're time travellers. We tread softly. It's okay to make ripples, but not tidal waves."
"I had a dream you'd all died. It was so real, I thought I'd made it happen."
"There's nothing to fear, strange maiden."
"What's the one thing that gods never do? Gods never actually show up!"
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you afraid."
"I have no reason to fear you."
"Not every misfortune that befalls us is down to you."
"We're not cowards. We do not run."
"Stay. You could help us. I know you could."
"A good death? Is that the best we can hope for?"
"I've got a hobby, thanks. It's you, by the way."
"Every time we do something like this, I keep thinking, what if something happens to you?"
"What do you think our chances are tomorrow?"
"I cannot keep you safe. I do not have the strength. But I will try to till the last beat of my heart."
"I'm sick of losing people."
"Look at you, with your eyes, and your never giving up, and your anger, and your kindness."
"One day, the memory of that will hurt so much that I won't be able to breathe."
"I do it for the adventure. Isn't that what life's all about?"
"Now is not the time to be showing off."
"How many people have you lost?"
"Why should I be responsible for you?"
"You're not like this. I know you're not."
"This is what you made of me."
"Did you miss me?"
"What's going on here? Fun and games?"
"I'm a friend. I've come to help."
"Don't do this. You know it's me. Don't let them trick you."
"I love you. I forgive you and I love you."
"You're talking nonsense to distract me from being really scared."
"You see, that's the problem. I am a brilliant liar. How are you ever going to know?"
"So, you must have thought I was dead for a while. How was that?"
"Do I look like I'm kidding? Is this a kidding face?"
"Is that your answer for everything?"
"Oh, admit it. I totally saved your life."
"What were you doing last night?"
"There is no nice way to say you're about to die."
"You enjoyed that way too much."
"You were upset, weren't you?"
"They look at me as if they want to kill me themselves."
"I did this to save you, you silly thing."
"Why do they always run?"
"So this is your life, then? Just bouncing around saving people?"
"Oh, she is the worst. I love her. Take that how you like."
"I swear, I never meant for anyone to get hurt."
"What were you thinking? Sacrificing yourself?"
"I can do whatever the hell I like."
"You've read the stories. You know who I am. In all of that time, did you ever hear anything about anyone who stopped me?"
"I did this, do you hear me? I did this. This is my fault."
"Listen, if this is the last I ever see of you, please, not like this."
"No. This - This isn't happening. This can't be happening."
"Why can't I be like you?"
"You're going to be alone now and you're very bad at that."
"Don't let this change you."
"Don't go. Stay with me."
"This is as brave as I know how to be."
"I know it's going to hurt you but, please, be a little proud of me."
"I can't keep doing this. I can't! I can't always do this! It's not fair!"
"You are not the only person who ever lost someone. It's the story of everybody. Get over it."
"Nothing's sad until it's over. Then everything is."
"Is this a story or did this really happen?"
"Isn't this going a little far?"
"I'll try not to break your jaw."
"Please, I don't want this."
"Look at me again. In the eye. Look at me. Just do it."
"Tell me what they did to you."
"People like me and you, we should say things to one another."
"You really are thick, aren't you?"
"You don't seem surprised to see me."
"I'm trying to keep you safe."
"Nobody's ever safe. I've never asked you for that. Ever."
"These have been the best years of my life and they are mine."
"So what happens now? Hey? Me and you, what do we do now?"
"Why don't we just fly away somewhere?"
"I don't think I could ever forget you."
"No. Stop it. You're saying goodbye. Don't say goodbye!"
"Run like hell, because you always need to. Laugh at everything, because it's always funny. Never be cruel and never be cowardly. And if you ever are, always make amends."
"Yeah. Pretty comfortable." Balfour looked decidedly uncomfortable as he said all this, not one for talking about... any such matters unless he really had to. It was not as if he swept through town with the intent of seducing its young ladies, sweeping them off of their feet simply to rob them or have his fun. That wasn't his way. "Her pa owns this big ranch, a while away north, they don't want for much." He rubbed at his jaw, fingers grazing over the stubble he would have to shave. "She reads a lot. Maybe too much. I think she's got ideas about how it is we all live, and how much more exciting that is."
He wished that Bessie would give him his hat back. He needed something to do with his hands, and it surely was not enough to keep on fidgeting with his waistcoat as he was. With a lack of other options and an overwhelming need to move his anxiety out of his body, Balfour set to pacing, hands on his hips and a frown firm at his brow.
"I wouldn't -" He was uncertain of how to say this next part without being offensive. Or without admitting that he himself would sooner live the life of a farmhand than any such one he had now. As much as he owed his life to Dutch, it exhausted him. And he would not willingly drag another soul into such a rotten state. So he said something else. "I have given her no cause to think she should run away with me. And I don't know how to dissuade her."
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@highaver said: "I'm sorry. I was stupid. I should have come back earlier. I wish that I had." magician bal for julia after he's vanished for a bit in t40
“Would you believe me if I said I had a feeling you'd be back?” Julia flicked the ash from the end of her cigarette, having watched him approach the cottage from her perch on the stone wall outside its front door. Reaching into her jacket pocket, she produced a pack of smokes and offered him one. “Not that you owe us anything, really.” She might've brought him home and helped him get sober, but he hadn't asked for that help, and she hadn't expected him to stick around and help them bring back magic just because of that.
"No, I..." The sentence died with a small sigh. Too much to say, he supposed, and no words for it. Balfour had wanted to vanish, as if that might suddenly fix everything, as if the world was so simple. But all he could think about was what if magic never came back? What if this was it? And what if he could help? Dad had always told him that you needed to fucking stand for something. Otherwise, what was the point?
And he had thought, honestly, that it would be a terrible thing to let Julia down.
He took a cigarette with a gruff cheers, patting down his pockets to find the lighter he still wasn't used to carrying. Not as light as it could be: "Did you seriously think I'd be back or are you just saying that so I don't feel like a massive dickhead?"
