Heteroshrekual

when springtime arrives……and the world turns green again……..grass is a thing…….the sun isn’t dead………wowow life is glowing again

me @ very talkative cats: i love you so much. please continue your story. tell me about your day. i love you

house arrest is so funny to me. you commited crimes, stay home

*overwhelmed at the adult toy store* *whispering under breath* The wand chooses the wizard. The wand chooses the wizard. The wand chooses th…

if you’ve ever had a crush on me god bless your poor misguided heart

EXCUSE ME WHAT

I need to be the hottest person at the grocery store

This perfectly captures my ridiculous inner monologue that revolves around impressing other people in the most oblique ways

god i wish i were a seal could just roll around on the floor and slap my big tummy all day

I need to be fuckin kissed. Just grab me by my collar and pull me close to you, or with both hands pull my face so my lips are against yours, or back me into a wall and hold my waist, or push me down on a sofa or bed and get on top of me and kiss the fuck outta me. I just need to be fuckin kissed man.  

love it when someone puts down their phone and just lives in the moment

being gay and having gay friends is a joy straight people will never know

slow kissing in dim lighting to a nice playlist

are you a sleep deprived gay or a touch starved gay