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idea: scene with two characters eagerly stripping each other clearly about to bone, but they keep getting interrupted by finding carefully concealed weapons in each other’s clothing, so they keep just unholstering, revealing and unstrapping increasingly ludicrous amounts of hidden guns and knives as the clothes come off, and it’s lowkey killing the mood a little

Alternatively: it's not killing the mood at all but it's totally making both of them giggle like they're twelve and possibly get lowkey competitive in a subconscious way about who has the most to drop.

...Oh

It’s not that there’s already a bunch of weapons hidden underneath the sink that makes it awkward so much as that there’s so many weapons hidden underneath the sink that they fall out of the cabinet with the unmistakable sound of a knife-alanche, and then the other person comes in like “I can explain!” and you’re just dead-ass standing there with your own armload of weapons like “I can also explain.”

Married version is shoving your hand in your partner’s clothes when you’re out of weapons because you KNOW where their spare is.  Or wearing a weapon in a spot you can’t draw from yourself because its now spare storage for your spouse’s weapons.

Every single one of you is a genius

virgin nicolò and experienced yusuf, but like, yusuf is an incurable romantic and nicolò has just forsaken a life of piety and chastity. yusuf wants to kiss sweet and slowly under the moonlight. nicolò wants to bounce on it in the middle of dinner. yusuf wants to read sonnets during lovemaking and nicolò wants to 69 on the floor.

GUESS WHO FINALLY WROTE IT?

So this was hilarious and hot and entirely delightful, go read immediately!

Deleting my dating apps because I want to meet someone the old fashioned way; fighting on opposing sides of a Holy war, discovering we're both immortal after killing each other repeatedly, and eventually becoming lovers for over 900 years.

Old Guard Headcanon: When Copley eventually passes away, his home becomes one of the safe houses, not because he left it for them, but because they like to cling to all of the memories that took place there over the years.

I’m afraid some of ya’ll just don’t have the freak gene that lets you enjoy ACTUAL enemies to lovers. Ya’ll think that trope is just like coworkers fighting over a promotion or smth like no give me people that have tried to maim and kill one another or give me nothing