* / low activity.

                                love always, merc.

            well i actually did some replies,     be proud of me.     but also people should come plot / rp with me on d.isco.

           after the incident in neibolt,     eddie had been lucky to survive,    even luckier to survive with the full function of his body beyond a lingering pain and nerve damage that would never be fixed.     he had stayed in derry to heal,    for the first while - in the hospital,     but then it had been back at the townhouse.    with myra calling to bitch at him about not being home yet,     at some point - he’d begun avoiding her phone calls for favor of spending time with beverly.    she was the one here.      she was the one taking care of him.      richie had offered,     bill had even offered to stay,     and ben - he’d assured them all that he was fine and that they should go about their own lives.     go back to normalcy.            bev had been the stubborn one,     refusing to leave his side when she could be there to take care of him.     and she had been,     she still was.      she was helping him with everything,     even now - the kiss had derailed a possible panic attack by forcing his focus elsewhere.      his eyes close partially and he leans to return the gentle bump of his nose against her own.      “ i would,     but i’d have to curiously ask:    how long is a while ? “

             eddie breathes a laugh of his own against her shoulder,     eyes closing once more so he can relax into the bed and try to fall back to sleep.     his hand shifts here and there,     clenching his fingers lightly as the still healing wound throbs with pain.    it does ease however as he relaxes into her.     soon enough,     his breathing evens out against her shoulder,     and he falls into what is probably the most restful sleep he’s had since neibolt.       since they’d killed that clown and barely escaped with their lives.      but they had,    and he had been slowly recovering from his injuries since then.      both physical,    and mental.             come morning,     the sun streaming through the shades was what wakes him,      and he lifts a hand to rub at his eyes.     the other still beneath bev,     hand laced with one of hers,      before he buries his face against her shoulder again.     he’s not stupid,     this cannot get out of hand - but for right now he can bask in the warmth of being tucked against her,      he can enjoy the closeness and the feeling of her curled against him so close.     and the thought that maybe..    maybe for one night,    he had helped her as much as she had been helping him.

           the truth of the matter had always been that eddie had forced himself to hide it,     sure -- it had been driven partially by his fear of losing richie.     but there were also fears about his mother,     about the other kids in derry.     about the bowers gang and their reactions to finding out he was gay.      they were always hot on their tails anyways,     he wouldn’t have been surprised if it had only had them after him even more.      and even worse too.      he would have been even more of a punching bag than he already had been as a child.     that was the curse of being the smallest one of the losers.             “ don’t.     you didn’t know it was going to hurt me,   you did it to protect yourself.     just like how i hid my feelings for you.     there were a dozen or more times that i could have told you i loved you,     that i wanted to.    but i couldn’t make myself.    i didn’t want to.    i couldn’t risk losing you,   just because i was in love with you.    it would have hurt far worse than being in the closet the rest of my life.     we were both idiots back then. “       a sheepish sort of smile came across his features,    and he brought his hand over richie’s as it settled on his cheek.     “ i’m sure you can make it up to me..    just..     don’t be afraid anymore,    rich.     and i won’t be either. “

         like bev,    eddie had always felt that something was missing.     people were missing.    people who had meant the world to him in another time and place,     he hadn’t remembered any of them,     but that feeling had always been there ever since he’d left and forgotten derry.     everything had gone,     like someone had wiped a chalkboard clean,      and suddenly,     he hadn’t even known where he grew up or where his childhood had been spent.     who had made it the happiest times of his life,     and who had made him feel loved and wanted when things got to be too much at home with his mother and her overbearing control,     and her munchhausen.          then they came back,    and the second he’d seen her - eddie’s heart had nearly leaped out of his chest.     and the longer they spent together,     the more memories came back.      she’d been an escape,     she’d treated him like a human,      she’d listened when he’d rambled about nothing and everything all at once.      she was the one he confided in when things got bad at home,     because she did the same to him.      they had been solace for each other,     because between them it had been the most comfortable friendship in which they understood everything between them.      sure,     he’d had a crush.      they all had at some point.      bev was gorgeous,     she always had been and he was sure that she always would be.         she is gorgeous.       that thought lingers as she leans into the hand he’s placed upon her cheek,      and she leans into his kiss to return it while his other hand slips beneath her shirt and settles warmth against her bra.      she arches,     and he can feel a shudder trailing up his spine in response.      his experience with women is..    well,    myra.     and that experience was lacking when it came to this.     he almost feels bad for the fact the thought of her doesn’t dissuade him from what he’s doing,     from rocking his hips down against beverly’s with a breathy groan against her skin.      he’s focused solely on bev,    and he shows that when both hands work her shirt up over her stomach and chest.         they dip behind her,     working the hooks of her bra loose as his mouth focuses on the mark against her neck.     before kissing down,      eddie brings himself lower....      lower,     so his lips can brush the swell of her right breast before the bra too is shoved out of the way and lips seize a nipple,     teeth lightly grazing against it as his hands drop between them to work on ridding her of pants as well.     his own are popped undone as well while he’s at it,    to make everything easier,     and faster for the both of them.     “ need you too..    so fucking bad,    bev. “     he murmurs against her skin,     tongue flicking against the nub his teeth had just lightly aggravated.     “ but right now,     i want to see how gorgeous you look when i’m eating you out. “      after all,    she deserves to be spoiled.     she’s busted her ass to take care of him,   to make sure he has everything he needs to recovery.