my own private psych ward

when people say my name im like.   cant believe i exist

gender essentialism is soooo funny bc it's like "this is what women are like" and you're like "I've met women and many of them, if not the majority, have not been like that" and it's like "well women SHOULD be like that" and you're like "why should women be like that" and its like "because that's what women are like"

did a bit of driving through the state of georgia today and wound up driving through a small town that i later discovered was called newborn, which is an odd name but doesn’t technically have anything wrong with it, except for the fact that i nearly gave myself whiplash doing a double-take at a building sign advertising NEWBORN TAXIDERMY

Young men today being SHOCKED and APPALLED that the girls they're dating are reading dark romance like the closet in my grandma's spare room wasn't totally chockers with Mills and Boon books when I was a kid. "Our generation is RUINED because the young women are reading NASTY PORN" if you saw the shit 50 year old women were reading in the nineties you'd hurl.

They should invent a glasses that you can lay on your side in bed wearing

passing in public makes me feel like white shrek

sorry to everyone out there who thinks they have the funniest tshirt but i think i can confidently say i just saw the actual funniest tshirt just now. i passed by a beautiful black woman with long multicolor braids blowing majestically in the beach breeze & she was wearing an oversized tshirt that said in gigantic letters "WHITE BOY OF THE YEAR"

accidentally said "invasive thoughts" instead of "intrusive thoughts" today and actually I think I'm onto something. this thought does not belong here and it is harming the local ecosystem

A big issue with online queer discourse is you never know what queer level your opponent is. You could be arguing about he/him lesbians with someone who thinks men can’t be bisexual

can you please make one for Ireland