Cae

For any of you Paula’s Choice fans, they’re having 20% off sitewide + free shipping on all orders + a free 5-piece gift with a $65+ purchase. The promo code is PC23 and it ends June 18. So if you’ve been meaning to stock up on some fav products or try some new ones out, now’s the time! 

Alright so we all want to run that blog or the Youtube channel or even that Instagram feed, but, how do we do it? How is it possible to be successful and consistent?

Firstly, find your niche. Don’t force yourself to do everything at once. That never really works, rather, try to start in one area and then branch out. For example, if you want to start a Mukbang channel on Youtube, stick to Mukbang until you have your rhythm and following. Same goes for beauty, fashion, fitness and even the arts. Running a channel that does DIY’s, Fitness tutorials, comedy, rants, pranks, beauty, fashion, mukbang, talk shows, vlogs, music and motivation all at once is hard for you and confusing for the followers.

Remember, we subscribe to different people for different reasons. You do not have to do all the content possible, just do you.

Make sure your niche is something you love doing. If you are doing fitness videos and hate working out, chances are that you won’t get a following because people will pick up on that. 

That being said, don’t be afraid to play around with different things until you find that niche. Many people are afraid to experiment or to step outside and do something different. Don’t let people dictate who you should be. Just figure out who you are. 

Do not  focus on the numbers. Don’t do things for the followers and the likes, do it for you. When you do what you love, it doesn’t matter if you’re Instafamous because you’re having a good time! Don’t allow yourself to believe that likes are more important.

Interact! If you have a following, find out what they want to see from you. It’s ok if you’ve run out of ideas. Just ask someone for an idea on what you should do and give them their due recognition for that idea. (Speaking of which, thanks to the Anon who told me to make this list)

Have a day that you decide to upload on and then expand on that after you’ve gotten into the habit of uploading. Don’t try to put too much on your plate at once because you’ll struggle and you might ultimately give up.

Don’t let watching people with huge followings and lots of support make you feel discouraged. Don’t be discouraged by how well someone else edits or does their makeup or by the price of their clothing they are wearing. Do you and realize that you aren’t them so you can’t bring their fire, but you can bring yours.

Improve, don’t give up. If you suck at editing or at taking great photos, work on it. Watch tutorials. Practice. Accept that you can’t start at pro level and then move on. Don’t give up and tell yourself that you’ll never make it. 

Plan your content. The quality of a video, blog post or even Instagram photo is usually so much better when a little planning has been put into it. If you want to post an amazing picture, think about aesthetics, colors and poses beforehand. Have notes jotted down for your Youtube video. Have a list of points to cover in your blog post.

Everything takes a little bit of hard work and patience, so train yourself. Ensure that your followers can count on some sort of content regularly. Sit down for an hour and work on your stuff.

If you’re not feeling your content then go over why you’re posting it. Is it for you or your followers? If it’s for your followers do you actually like them or do you simply want to be adored by them? Maybe your motivation is wrong. Reevaluate.

Ask successful people questions. Do your research on how they became successful and incorporate those things in your blog. Little habits like regular uploads, using hashtags, creating unique content and being unproblematic can really give you exposure.

Be nice. Even if your following isn’t huge, having strangers support you, even if their numbers are 5 or 500 000, is an amazing feeling. If they reach out to you, respond appropriately. Too many people grow on social media and then think that’s reason enough for them to treat their fans like crap. We’re all people here and don’t ever forget that.

And again, IF YOU AREN’T ENJOYING YOUR CONTENT THEN YOU’RE DOING THE WRONG THING!

Here’s another repeat, DON’T FOCUS ON YOUR FOLLOWERS, FOCUS ON WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY. 

BE NICE. But also take no shit.

 Last repeat:If you’re just starting, you won’t have everything down perfect. Accept that and try to grow from it. DON’T GIVE UP.

It sounds like you could use some kind words right about now. We suggest Koko, an anonymous support community made up of nice, caring people like you.

Here’s a transitioning starter pack for all my trans folk out there!

Transfeminine resources:

Presentation:

Tucking

Chest area

Voice

Broad shoulders tips

Hair removal

Feminine walk

Curves

Waist training

Growing out your hair

Clothing

Makeup

Passing

Medical transitioning:

Not medically transitioning

Fertility

Estrogen & anti-androgens/testosterone blockers FAQ

The types of surgery available

Surgery: A guide for transfeminine people

Facial Feminization Options

Breast Augmentation

Genital surgery

Other:

Representation

Transfeminine period dysphoria

Yes, Transfeminine People Can Get Period Symptoms

Slipping into masculinity

Women’s restroom etiquette

Transfeminine people can breastfeed

Having sex or masturbating

Transmasculine resources:

Presentation:

Binding FAQ

Clothing

Facial hair

Masculine makeup

Getting short hair / Masculine long hair

If you can’t start T

Lowering your voice

Packing and standing to pee

Passing as male

Not shaving legs

Swimming

Medical transitioning:

Not medically transitioning

Fertility

Puberty blockers

Testosterone FAQ

Top surgery

Facial masculinization surgery

Body masculinization surgery

Hysterectomy and oophorectomy

Bottom surgery (genital surgery)

Other:

Periods and related things

Help! I need to see a gyno

Pumping

Masturbation and sex

Using the men’s bathroom

Hudson’s FTM Guide

Height dysphoria

Hip dysphoria

More resources:

What gender am I? A brief intro to questioning

What is the transgender umbrella?

How do I choose a name?

How do I come out at work/school or to family/friends?

Dysphoria info and tips page

Mental health coping page

Being trans in school

Non-binary resources

Resources to send allies/friends

A page to send to parents/guardians

Convincing someone to respect name/pronouns 

Here is how to get hormones in the US

Here is how to get hormones in the UK

Here’s a US resource with info on changing legally changing your name and gender marker 

Here is a UK resource with info on changing legally changing your name and gender marker

What are the WPATH-SOC guidelines?

How to buy a trans-related item online without parents knowing

I have to go swimming, what do I wear/do?

Trying to sleep when you have dysphoria

Traveling by plane

Does transitioning help mental health?

Trans identity isn’t a mental disorder

Being religious and LGBT

Suicide and crisis hotlines

How to save money

Gender neutral pronouns in Spanish

Getting insurance to cover your transition

Gender Variance Around the World Over Time

A map of gender-diverse cultures

American LGBT history by the National Parks Service

Transgender Lives: Your Stories (to see trans adults) 

1. Take yourself out to the museum, movies, dinner, whatever you want.

2. Spend time learning about yourself. What your interests are, what you want for the future, what your strengths and weaknesses are personality wise. List these things out and keep them in a notebook or somewhere you can keep them safe.

3. Spend time improving yourself. It can be a mental, physical, spiritual, or financial improvement.

If you’re going for a mental improvement, learn what makes you happy, sad, excited, angry. If you find that people are bringing you down, cut them from your life. If you find that an activity or person is making you happy, spend more time with that person or doing that activity. Assess your level on self love and self confidence and work to improve it.

If you’re going for a physical improvement, assess your health. I’m not saying stand in a mirror and pick out all of your flaws. That’s counterintuitive. I’m talking about trying to eat healthier, limited junk foods, eating more proteins, working out if you want, build muscles and flexibility.

If you want a spiritual improvement, assess your relationship with your faith. Are you following the core principles of your faith, attending religious services, reading your religious texts?

If you want financial improvement, track your expenses for a month or two and see where you’re overspending. Where you find overspending, cut those things out or limit them. That extra money can be put into a savings account for travelling, spoils for yourself, or an emergency fund. Whatever you want. You could also look for a job to work if you would like, or work more hours to get that $$$ if you want and have the time.

Work on your speech and vocabulary. Practice speaking properly with a clear voice and enunciation. Learn new words to improve your vocabulary by making Quizlet flashcards of words you’ve heard/read and don’t know the meaning of.

If you don’t like the way you dress, experiment with different fashions or articles of clothing. Pinterest has some great ideas for outfits. When you find something you like, pin it to a Pinterest board. Then when an item similar to it goes on sale at a store, purchase it and try it out in your outfits. If you love it, great! If you don’t, sell or donate it.

4. Do things you enjoy doing. Devote time to your hobbies like you would to a friend or s/o. Your hobbies are also your loves.

What measures are taken to secure the building ?

Are the walls thin? Brief info of who lives in the building. Are they college kids? People that work through the day? Elderly? Is it a mix? Where does the garbage go?

when and for what reasons are your landlords allowed to enter your home? how much of a notice should they give you before entering?

can the landlord make modifications to your home or apartment without your approval? to what extent?

what are the options and conditions for breaking your lease early if there’s an emergency? (this is ESPECIALLY important for anyone moving to a new state/considerable distance where you are not able to visit the apartment/home before you rent – students get taken advantage of ALL THE TIME with this shit)

if your first or last month at the property is a partial stay (i.e. you move in on july 15th, and rent is typically due on the first) make sure you don’t pay the full first month’s rent before you know the area laws! in many states, you are only legally required to pay for the time you are occupying the property

is renter’s insurance necessary? many apartments want at least 30k coverage, which can run a couple hundred dollars extra per year

-ask if there’s been any consistent/frequent trouble with electricity/internet connectivity/cable if you have it

-what KIND of electricity? 

-what kind of heating (hot water/electric)

-how secure is the neighborhood (if you don’t know) 

- Do they have a policy on rent increases? (Also check if there’s a legal limit to rent increases in the area).

- Are utilities paid in a separate check or with the rent?

- Are utilities metered or pro-rated (in older buildings it’s common to be charged by square footage and/or number of occupants, which can leave you subsidizing the people who turn the a/c down to 60 in the summer or the heat up to 80 in the winter - you may not be able to avoid this but it’s worth trying).

- Are there any switched circuits in the apartment. Buildings built in the late sixties through the early eighties often have switched circuits. If they do, then with the number of devices used these days you will probably have to have something important on the switched circuit - tape the switch in the on position! (Trust me).

- What are the rules on hanging pictures?

- Who is responsible for paying for and replacing bulbs in permanent fixtures? If it’s you and there’s a fixture with weird/unusual bulbs (globe style, chandelier style, etc) ask where you can buy the bulbs.

- Take pictures/make detailed notes about damages already present on move-in. Add additional sheets to what they give you if needed because chances are they’re going to be just as nitpicky when you move out to try and keep part of your security deposit.

Herbology class (Harry Potter) doodles on my French notes. With Professor Sprout, Hermione, and some mandrakes. 

*Click on images for better photo quality

I feel like I have to share my pathway towards success with you because I spent all my life considering success as the very end of the journey when in reality you can have it all along the way. And I think that understanding this is fundamental, not only for your studies but also for your everyday life.

I’ll start by showing you a little example. During my long stay in Cartagena I had the occasion to do a few salsa dance lessons with some of my friends (yeah cliché I know) and as I was listening to the salsa teacher I kept telling myself that I was too rigid and not coordinated at all and that I’d look terrible dancing.

When we had to practice the moves I couldn’t keep up with the rhythm and honestly, I was a mess. The teacher even came to me to tell me that I was thinking too much about the moves!!

In that very moment, I thought: “ok Margot, now think you’re a latina goddess, you’re sexy and you’re a born-to-be a dancer”. As soon as I started telling this to myself, my moves completely improved. They got so much better that I was the only one in the group who was able to perform all the moves correctly on the first try.

What I want to tell you with this story is : you won’t go anywhere as long as you keep a negative mindset. The second you switch your mindset and you turn it into something positive, a little miracle happen. Just as me being able to perform good dance moves (and trust me that this one is really a true miracle :)

Now, I know it’s easy to say but I really want you to understand this because it’ll change your life like it changed mine : whatever you think about, you become.

The minute you start filling your brain with useless thoughts like “I’m not enough of this”, “I wish I had this”, “I wish I looked like that”, “I’m too fat to wear that”, “I have no self-control”, “I’m bad at maths”, etc. well guess what : you’ll still be bad at maths, you’ll stay sad and in months from now you’ll be stuck in the same place.

Here are some bits of advice about what you should be doing instead. Notice that this post is inspired by Gabrielle Bernstein’s book “The Universe has your Back” and also by other inspiring video’s I watched in the past few months :) 

Focus on your goal and imagine how you’re gonna achieve it, how you’re gonna feel and how proud you will be. Make it as clear as possible. Write it down in your journal if you want. Visualize every single detail. If your goal isn’t clear, it’s ok! You can still think about how you can improve your life or how you can work on just loving yourself more. And don’t be afraid to think big.

Practice positive affirmations. This one will be hard in the beginning because we all are used to focus on the things we don’t have, or the habits we want to get rid of, but we never pay attention to what we already have or why we really want success. Instead of thinking “I want to stop biting my nails so I won’t be ashamed of them” think “I’ll be so proud of myself if I stop biting my nails and I’ll feel more confident!”. Trust me, it makes ALL the difference.

Practice gratitude. You have no idea about the positive impact it has. If you struggle with this, try to make a list of at least 5 things you are grateful for every night before going to bed. Write it in a journal or just think about it for a moment. There’s no “wrong” way to practice gratitude. You can be grateful for the pizza you had today, or your cat. It just has to be positive.

Get some inspiration. Read a new book or look for some videos that inspire you. Get closer to people you admire. Inspiration is so important because it allows you to get a better view of what you want to become. I really started changing my mindset the first time I read “You Are a Badass” by Jen Sincero. It has been so eye-opening to me that I started practicing more and more positive actions ! I also found TED Talks to be really helpful for me!! 

Judge less. I know, we’re all humans. We all judge and it’s totally normal to do so. However, we can modify our judgment towards a lot of situations : whenever you notice yourself judging something or someone, take a step back and think why you are doing so, it’ll help you to see clearer and you’ll let more space for love. You don’t know what’s behind the people you’re judging and it doesn’t help you to reach your goal. Use this energy to work on yourself instead.

Stop comparing yourself. Don’t stop because you think you’ll never be enough. You don’t know what the others are going through, you don’t even know what they are thinking. I remember in my first med school year that I was constantly focusing on what the others were doing and comparing it to what I was working on instead. I spent so much energy doing so instead of studying that it made me fail my exams. And you know what the funniest part is? That the people I valued better than me failed their exams too. This definitely changed my vision! The next year I only focused on myself and on my own study methods and I passed all my exams :) 

Start where you are and celebrate small victories : you’ve been feeling like crap and all you did was taking a shower? It’s fine. You took care of yourself. Be happy about it. Be grateful to be able to do so. Don’t wait for the right moment to start something because the truth is that there’s no right moment and that you’ll never really be ready. Success is more about the journey than the destination. Always remember that.

Stay true to yourself. Don’t seek perfection but start loving every part of yourself instead. Don’t apologize for being authentic because it will allow you to understand what truly matters to you in every situation. Being your own self will also help you focus on your goal and not letting distractions around. You’ll gain confidence as you’ll know what works best for you and you’ll be able to let go of negative things in your life.

Also, don’t apologize for your success and your abundance. You are worth it. You’ve always been. 

I hope these tips will help you to reach your goals! You deserve to be happy and successful!

june 24, 7:01 pm sorry for the long hiatus but i’m back and with a new phone ! wrapping up this spread took longer than i thought (i had to cut out part of the spread bc i wrote ab a thing and mentioned a name haha) but its here ! hope everyone is having a lovely summer and a happy litha ! :)

07.06.2018

☀️Get It - PRISTIN V

Adult Wednesday Addams 

1. Keep a journal where you record all your different thoughts, feelings and ideas. Look for patterns and consistency – ideas that grab you and get stronger over time.

2. Explore new passions, interests and hobbies. Some of those will stick and intensify; others will slowly fade and disappear.

3. Step outside your comfort zone and try and break with your old routine. That will lead you in different directions, release creative thoughts, and spark some fresh ideas.

4. Talk to people to get different perspectives, and listen to their feedback, and points of view.

5. Have the self-confidence to listen to your heart, and work of developing your creativity.

6. Review your current goals – and how much they mean to you. Ask yourself: Do you still feel motivated, energised and inspired?