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she had returned home for the holidays but... the emptiness in her heart ( stemming from his absence ) prompted her return. so with a wrapped gift in her hands she rang the door bell to their home. // cc;
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā heāsĀ alwaysĀ likedĀ theĀ holidays.Ā theĀ decorationsĀ peopleĀ putĀ upĀ inĀ theĀ stores,Ā theĀ lightsĀ strungĀ upĀ aroundĀ housesĀ andĀ onĀ theĀ treesĀ inĀ theĀ park,Ā andĀ theĀ warmthĀ ofĀ aĀ fireplaceĀ whileĀ watchingĀ variousĀ moviesĀ Ā āāāĀ itāsĀ somethingĀ heāsĀ enjoyedĀ everĀ sinceĀ heĀ wasĀ aĀ child.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā latelyĀ thatĀ joyĀ seemsĀ toĀ haveĀ faded.Ā heĀ stillĀ findsĀ beautyĀ inĀ theĀ thingsĀ aroundĀ him,Ā butĀ heĀ doesnātĀ feelĀ thatĀ sameĀ satisfactionĀ anymore.Ā isĀ thisĀ aĀ signĀ ofĀ himĀ growingĀ upĀ ?Ā no,Ā itĀ canātĀ beĀ ...Ā evenĀ hisĀ grandparentsĀ andĀ auntsĀ andĀ unclesĀ areĀ stillĀ havingĀ fun.Ā soĀ whyĀ isnātĀ heĀ ?
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā ugh.Ā heĀ exhalesĀ quietly,Ā gripĀ tighteningĀ onĀ hisĀ coffeeĀ cupĀ (Ā whichĀ isĀ appropriatelyĀ filledĀ withĀ hotĀ chocolateĀ )Ā asĀ heĀ staresĀ upĀ atĀ theĀ ceilingĀ beforeĀ craningĀ hisĀ neckĀ toĀ peerĀ downĀ theĀ hall.Ā thereāsĀ nothingĀ there,Ā butĀ heĀ wishesĀ thereĀ was Ā āāāĀ heāsĀ lonely.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā maybeĀ thatāsĀ whyĀ heĀ doesnātĀ feelĀ happy.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā aĀ rollĀ ofĀ hisĀ eyesĀ follows,Ā thenĀ anĀ irritatedĀ huff.Ā heĀ feelsĀ badĀ forĀ feelingĀ bad.Ā thereāsĀ plentyĀ ofĀ otherĀ peopleĀ whoĀ spendĀ theĀ holidaysĀ alone,Ā itāsĀ nothingĀ new. Ā he Ā had Ā thought Ā that Ā maybe Ā spendingĀ christmasĀ alone Ā for Ā once Ā would Ā be Ā nice.Ā whileĀ heĀ enjoysĀ havingĀ hisĀ familyĀ around,Ā itāsĀ quiteĀ calmingĀ toĀ justĀ sitĀ inĀ darknessĀ andĀ letĀ silenceĀ surroundĀ him.Ā heĀ oftenĀ prefersĀ toĀ beĀ aloneĀ duringĀ hisĀ freeĀ timeĀ anywayĀ ...Ā yetĀ thisĀ timeĀ heĀ canātĀ bringĀ himselfĀ toĀ feelĀ peaceful.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā heĀ missesĀ herĀ presence.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā itāsĀ aĀ bitĀ strangeĀ notĀ havingĀ herĀ around.Ā evenĀ ifĀ theyĀ arenātĀ closeĀ by,Ā sheāsĀ onlyĀ aĀ roomĀ orĀ soĀ awayĀ andĀ shouldĀ heĀ thinkĀ ofĀ somethingĀ toĀ sayĀ heĀ knowsĀ whereĀ toĀ findĀ her.Ā heĀ canĀ stillĀ text,Ā butĀ itĀ justĀ isnātĀ theĀ same.Ā isĀ sheĀ warmĀ rightĀ nowĀ ?Ā eatingĀ enoughĀ duringĀ mealsĀ ?Ā sheĀ hasnātĀ caughtĀ aĀ cold,Ā rightĀ ?Ā heĀ knowsĀ theĀ icyĀ temperaturesĀ arenātĀ theĀ bestĀ forĀ herĀ health.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā heāsĀ soĀ caughtĀ upĀ inĀ hisĀ thoughtsĀ thatĀ heĀ almostĀ doesnātĀ hearĀ theĀ doorbell,Ā thoughĀ theĀ secondĀ chimeĀ isĀ enoughĀ toĀ dragĀ himĀ backĀ intoĀ realityĀ andĀ heāsĀ untanglingĀ himselfĀ fromĀ theĀ pileĀ ofĀ blanketsĀ toĀ makeĀ hisĀ wayĀ downstairs Ā āāāĀ heĀ keepsĀ oneĀ becauseĀ whoĀ knowsĀ howĀ coldĀ itĀ isĀ outside.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā theĀ sightĀ ofĀ hisĀ loverĀ isĀ definitelyĀ unexpected,Ā butĀ itĀ hasĀ hisĀ heartĀ soaringĀ Ā (Ā aĀ welcomedĀ feelingĀ toĀ replaceĀ theĀ chillingĀ andĀ uncaringĀ natureĀ heādĀ feltĀ onlyĀ momentsĀ beforeĀ )Ā andĀ heĀ instantlyĀ reachesĀ outĀ toĀ slideĀ hisĀ armsĀ aroundĀ herĀ andĀ pullĀ herĀ closer.Ā Ā āĀ iĀ thoughtĀ youĀ wereĀ goingĀ awayĀ forĀ awhileĀ ?Ā āĀ aĀ smallĀ smileĀ formsĀ andĀ heāsĀ takingĀ theĀ blanketĀ offĀ toĀ wrapĀ itĀ aroundĀ herĀ shouldersĀ instead.Ā Ā āĀ iĀ missedĀ you.Ā āĀ aĀ lightĀ kissĀ isĀ pressedĀ againstĀ herĀ cheekĀ asĀ heĀ plucksĀ theĀ bowĀ ofĀ offĀ theĀ presentĀ toĀ setĀ itĀ onĀ topĀ ofĀ herĀ head.Ā Ā āĀ iĀ seeĀ santaĀ cameĀ aĀ fewĀ hoursĀ early.Ā iāllĀ haveĀ toĀ thankĀ him.Ā ā
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā heĀ wondersĀ ifĀ sheĀ knowsĀ howĀ trulyĀ happyĀ sheĀ makesĀ him.

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[ text ] the fact that jj wont text me back caught me off guard too but never accept rejection as failure
[ ā¾ dohyun ] question.
[ ā¾ dohyun ] do you ever get tired of talking ?
misc sentence starters
āĀ i wish i knew how to talk about it.Ā āĀ Ā āĀ you donāt have to talk, we can just sit together.Ā Ā āĀ Ā āĀ i donāt want to be alone anymore.Ā āĀ Ā āĀ i wish i could hate you.Ā āĀ āĀ take a seat, weāre gonna be here a while.Ā ā āĀ i need you to trust me.Ā āĀ Ā āĀ i missed/miss you.Ā āĀ Ā āĀ she/he wonāt listen to me.Ā ā āĀ let me do this for you. please.Ā āĀ Ā āĀ is there anything else you want to say to me?Ā ā āĀ tell me something happy.Ā āĀ Ā āĀ promise me.Ā ā āĀ i just want/wanted to help.Ā āĀ Ā āĀ let me explain.Ā ā āĀ i didnāt/donāt need you to understand, i just wanted/want you to support me.Ā āĀ Ā āĀ iām on your side.Ā ā āĀ iāve got your back, okay? ā āĀ please, tell me you have a plan.Ā ā āĀ stay with me tonight.Ā ā āĀ donāt go. please.Ā āĀ Ā āĀ iāve been alone for so long iām afraid i donāt know what itās like not to be.Ā āĀ Ā āĀ talk to me.Ā āĀ Ā āĀ i did what i had to do.Ā ā āĀ we canāt keep going on like this.Ā ā āĀ Ā iām just tired.Ā ā āĀ iām scared.Ā ā āĀ itās okay to be afraid. fear can be good. use it.Ā ā āĀ itās better to expect disappointment.Ā ā āĀ hope is dangerous.Ā ā āĀ i like seeing you smile.Ā āĀ Ā āĀ you look beautiful.Ā āĀ Ā āĀ be patient with her/him. theyāre trying.Ā āĀ Ā āĀ iām trying my best and itās not good enough. itās never good enough. ā āĀ iām starting to think iām just fucked up.Ā āĀ Ā āĀ have a drink with me.Ā ā āĀ she/he is better off without me. but i guess thatās their choice.Ā ā āĀ you canāt dictate whatās best for someone else. ā āĀ can i help you?Ā ā āĀ i thought youād like this.Ā ā āĀ do you wanna get out of here?Ā ā āĀ walk with me?Ā ā āĀ well, shit.Ā ā
You look at me with disappointment in your eyes but I warned you from the start I really am not good enough
f.a (via seafoamxsiren)
[ text ] they did surgery on a grape
incoming message from dohyun ? jj decides to leave him on read.Ā
š:p
intimidation āāāā ( a. )
š āāĀ OH MY GOD DONāT EAT ME PLEASE

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concept: you taking me to an aquarium and watching lovingly as i completely ignore you to look at the jellyfish
maybe i'll be tracer. i'm already tracer. what about widowmaker? i'm already widowmaker. i'll be bastion. NERF bastion. you're right so winston. i wanna be winston. i guess i'll be genji. i'm already genji. then i'll be mccree. i already chose mccree
hi i love u ...
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā iĀ loveĀ uĀ moreĀ :////
ā how do you keep the monsters at bay ? ā
° ⧠POETRY STARTERS || ACCEPTING !
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā heĀ WONDERSĀ ifĀ herĀ questionĀ isĀ SARCASTICĀ orĀ not,Ā butĀ pairedĀ withĀ herĀ EXPRESSIONĀ heĀ figuresĀ sheĀ MUSTĀ beĀ serious.Ā itĀ seemsĀ likeĀ HIS LIFEĀ isĀ filledĀ withĀ VARIOUSĀ monsters,Ā bothĀ physicalĀ andĀ INĀ theĀ metaphoricalĀ senseĀ andĀ NEITHERĀ areĀ toĀ hisĀ liking.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā āĀ iĀ amĀ aĀ monster.Ā āĀ aĀ SCOFFĀ followsĀ andĀ heāsĀ tiltingĀ hisĀ HEADĀ soĀ heĀ canĀ SEEĀ herĀ better,Ā lipsĀ formingĀ aĀ SMALLĀ smirk.Ā Ā āĀ theyāreĀ scaredĀ ofĀ me.Ā iĀ DONāTĀ haveĀ toĀ doĀ anything.Ā didĀ youĀ FORGETĀ alreadyĀ nowĀ ?Ā shouldĀ iĀ remindĀ youĀ againĀ ?Ā iĀ HATE REPEATING MYSELFĀ butĀ perhapsĀ iāllĀ MAKEĀ anĀ exceptionĀ thisĀ time.Ā Ā ā
ā maybe itād be easier if we call came with an instruction manual ā
° ⧠POETRY STARTERS || ACCEPTING !
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā thatĀ SOUNDSĀ bothĀ helpfulĀ andĀ TERRIFYINGĀ atĀ theĀ sameĀ time.Ā onĀ ONEĀ handĀ itādĀ beĀ easierĀ toĀ FINISHĀ tasksĀ andĀ suchĀ butĀ ONĀ theĀ otherĀ doesnātĀ THATĀ meanĀ someoneĀ moreĀ POWERFULĀ existsĀ andĀ wasĀ theĀ oneĀ TO CREATEĀ everythingĀ ?Ā heāsĀ notĀ sureĀ IFĀ heādĀ likeĀ that.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā āĀ likeĀ robotsĀ orĀ somethingĀ ?Ā āĀ heĀ PICKS UP AĀ pieceĀ ofĀ theĀ figurineĀ theyāreĀ BUILDINGĀ andĀ pointsĀ toĀ theĀ GUIDEĀ theyāveĀ beenĀ usingĀ toĀ PUTĀ itĀ together.Ā Ā āĀ itĀ dependsĀ onĀ whatĀ itĀ COMESĀ with.Ā ifĀ itāsĀ anĀ OUTLINEĀ ofĀ myĀ lifeĀ andĀ SHOWSĀ meĀ whatĀ happensĀ thenĀ IāDĀ beĀ interested.Ā ā

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